


It's Just Business

by Santai



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: AU, Afghanistan, Alternate Universe - Human, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Businessmen, Complete, Corporate Espionage, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Everyone wears suits and drinks coffee, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Fluff, FrostIron - Freeform, Human Loki (Marvel), Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Nightmares, Plot, Plot got away from me a little..., Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Slow Burn, Tony Stark Has A Heart
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-23
Updated: 2019-05-04
Packaged: 2019-07-01 10:32:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 30
Words: 130,437
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15772329
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Santai/pseuds/Santai
Summary: Loki is a saboteur. It is his job to lie, cheat, and seduce New York's foremost business men and women at his employer's behest in order to get to their most prized works. And he's good at it. Better than he might like to let himself realize. It's no kindness to accept your role in the world is to do nothing but destroy the lives of others. Then again, it's not like he really has a choice in anything. His targets were slid across a desk in a brown folder and results were demanded of him. And the projects were getting more complicated by the day. The immensely successful and well-liked CEO of Stark Industries would be his most difficult project to date and it may well end up being his last.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> (Very quick A/N: This is a rewrite of something I wrote 4 years ago that never got finished for various reasons. But I really liked the concept and this time I really want to meet its conclusion. Hope you enjoy! I appreciate any feedback you may have!)

The air was uncomfortably warm as Loki stepped out of the bathroom, back into the bedroom. He wrinkled his nose at the old man sprawled out on the expensive purple covers, eyes closed. Unconscious, most likely, given the amount of alcohol he'd drunk in the last couple of hours. The man was naked in preparation for how he had expected the rest of the night to pan out. It was not unwarranted, Loki supposed, the plan had worked for the most part. The target was older, in his mid to late fifties, a litttle over overweight, but not succumbing to his years too early, maintaining the majority of the colour to his hair. Loki hadn’t anticipated him to be able to hold his liquor quite so well. This part should have happened an hour ago.  

Loki sighed, relieved that he had had his timings right and the man had passed out before Loki could return from ‘freshening up’. In truth, he had simply gone into the bathroom, had a glass of water and tried not to look at himself too closely in the mirror. If he didn’t see his reflection, perhaps he could pretend this was someone else’s evening. He hadn’t even bothered to unbutton his shirt any further than the man had already managed. Which wasn’t particularly far.  

The man had been an executive of one of New York’s biggest firms, the name of which didn’t matter, nor did its line of work. He hadn't wanted to know in the first place as it would only serve to ground what he was doing in reality. Something he was happy to avoid for as long as possible. In fact, Loki made a concerted effort to know only the bare minimum to execute these projects. Whatever made the job more straightforward. 

He gave the slack-jawed man one final once over to make sure that he was completely unaware before he slipped from the darkened bedroom and into the lounge of the flat. It was still lit, the man too keen to move the evening into the bedroom to bother with such trivialities. It was furnished with professional minimalism, dark wood cabinets and bookshelves pressed against the clean, bright walls, complemented the leather sofas and a dark rug that sat on laminated oak flooring. There were no personal effects anywhere in sight, not even a painting on the wall. Loki couldn’t help but commend the man’s tastes, though it was apparent this was not this man’s only property.  

He padded quietly across the room to one of the cabinets not far from the large window overlooking the cityscape. The leftmost drawer slipped open with ease at his slightest pull. Lying in the bottom was simple, black, hardbound project book, exactly where the man had drunkenly confessed it to be not an hour ago.  

Loki’s lip twitched up into a grim smile as he lifted it out and flicked through the pages. It was full of scribbled notes and hand-drawn diagrams, initial plans that Loki quite frankly cared little for. All this book was to him was a way to keep his job for another day.  

How he felt about that prospect was something he would deal with later. 

Sealing off that particular thought train, he tucked the book under one arm and reached back into the drawer once more. A USB stick was taped to the back panel, out of view of anyone giving the drawer a cursory glance. It came away easily from the wood as Loki slipped his fingers behind the tape, pulling it out of the drawer and into his back pocket. With that, he closed the drawer.  

That was it. He had successfully completed another project. He held what was undoubtedly this man’s life’s work. It would have made his career. His firm would have double, no, tripled its profits and he would be able to enjoy his retirement twenty years early. Loki’s employer couldn’t be having that though.  

Now that man’s future held nothing but failure. Loss of everything. Respect, career, money. Gone.  

The man would know who did it. The guy with the black hair he met in the bar down the street. His name? He never got a name. It didn’t matter at the time. Where does he live? No idea. His own apartment was nearby why would he even ask. Who does he work for?! It didn’t exactly come up in conversation. Why did you tell him everything?!  ...Hubris.  

The door clicked quietly behind him as Loki left the apartment, two hours after arriving. It was a new record. Loki’s stomach churned sickeningly at the thought. 

********** 

The office building was spotted with lights. It was 10:30pm, only those trying to make a name for themselves in the career, or those who had little choice in the matter were here at this hour. It was a tall building, not unlike the other tall buildings of New York but it seemed to loom that little bit more than its neighbours.  

He paused at its base, taking a moment for himself in the summer night air, before striding confidently towards the doors. There was a security guard sat behind a wide circular desk directly opposite the entrance. She cast a lazy glance his way as Loki crossed the lobby. As he reached the set of turnstiles, the guard reached out and pushed a button somewhere on her console. There was a soft beep, and Loki continued on through towards the bank of elevators ahead. Behind him, he heard the security guard pick up her phone, already announcing his arrival to the man Loki was going to see.  

No matter how many times Loki had ridden this lift, he still hated it. Why exactly, he couldn’t say. Claustrophobia didn’t affect him elsewhere and never had. Perhaps it was the sheer simplicity of it. It was a dull, metal box with just two buttons. One for each of its only two destinations. It might as well have been a service elevator to anyone who hadn’t been told differently. For such a vast and wealthy company, this elevator seemed much more appropriate as a container for transporting livestock to the slaughter.  

Maybe that was it.  

A sharp ding echoed through the box, triggering that same almost physical reaction he felt every time he came here. Loki took a deep breath, ran a hand through his hair and adjusted his collar before the doors opened.  

There was an old hunched man waiting to greet him, standing just a few feet from the lift’s doors. Despite his years here, Loki had never asked for, nor cared to find out this man’s name. Names were for loved ones, friends, family, friendly acquaintances even. This man fit none of those descriptors. He barely fit ‘man’.  

Loki fought the urge to wrinkle his nose as the man stepped closer, sending a waft of the sickly stench of death up his nose.  

“You’re early, Laufeyson,” the man drawled in that rasping, choked voice that could not have suited him better. 

Loki eyed him, “I wanted to get this done.”  

The man smiled. Before he had begun his work here, Loki would not have believed that anyone could become more grotesque while smiling. “Thanos will be pleased,” he nodded to himself, making Loki even more uncomfortable. With that, he turned and began to shuffle back to his desk.  

The desk was set off to the right of the room that the elevator opened up into. It was the only way into this room, at least as far as Loki knew. There were no windows and no other elevators. The only doors were a set of tall double doors made of black wood, set into the wall opposite the elevator. The whole room was just a bit bigger than 20ft square, and the only furniture in it was the desk, and the chair behind it.  

Loki didn’t hesitate to follow the man to the desk, requiring a force of will to keep his head up. Though he couldn’t bring himself to look at those doors. He’d never been through them. Never even seen through them. But he knew what was behind them, and it was the last place Loki ever wanted to be. The moment he stepped through those doors, he would have already lost everything.  

Loki pulled the book out from under his arm and dropped it onto the desk with a bang, tossing the stick alongside it. 

The man watched them with an odd hunger, “You’ve done well,” he said after a moment, lifting the items off the desk and placing them almost reverently into one of his drawers.  

“When have I ever failed?" Loki replied shortly.  

The man looked up and met Loki’s gaze, instantly smothering any tiny spark of confidence he might have felt, “Don’t be so smug, boy. Remember where you are, and who put you there.” 

Loki tried to keep his chin up under the weight of the man’s gaze. It was profound and crippling, and Loki clenched his jaw and looked to the floor. This one of the few places where his silver-tongue would do nothing but dig his own grave just that little bit deeper. But that didn’t stop him from contemplating how much of a kindness it would be to rid the world of this man’s withered existence. It was a small satisfaction that he clung to. Even if he did hope that his face didn’t betray his thoughts.  

The man chuckled. A broken, gravelly noise, more akin to a death rattle than an expression of amusement, “You may go. Return here tomorrow for your next assignment.” 

Loki didn’t speak, simply nodded curtly and turned for the elevator, desperate to get away from the man, the office, and that door.  

******************** 

Tony swirled the dregs of his drink, half melted ice cubes chinking against the glass. Quite how he’d found this bar, he couldn’t fully remember. All he knew was that he was hiding from Steve and Pepper and they already knew all of his usual haunts. Something about falling behind on schedules and needing to actually pay attention in the board meetings. The same old stuff. Tony just couldn’t deal with it right now.  

This particular establishment was a good distance away from Stark Tower. Hopefully far enough that Steve and Pepper wouldn’t think to look here. A classy place, filled with men, not unlike himself, wealthy, well-dressed, drinking expensive drinks and talking lucidly over the quiet music in the background. Even the bartender was wearing a shirt and tie. This wasn’t a place to get blind drunk. They’d never look for him here. He smirked at his own ingenuity and finished his drink in one final mouthful. 

Sliding his glass back across the bar, Tony motioned for a refill and glanced up at the clock. It was nearly 1am. He’d been there for about three hours now, and he had only reached a pleasant buzz. He mentally patted himself on the back and rewarded himself with a sip of the crisp, fresh beverage, officially welcoming in the new day.  

The sound of the bar door opening drew his attention, and he turned his head slowly, still holding the glass off the table in one hand. The man stood in the doorway had his attention immediately. He was tall and slim, dressed in a green shirt and skinny black jeans that made his legs seem even longer than they were. Black hair was slicked back over his head, just brushing his shoulders, framing his face that had features sharp enough to cut. The man stood in the doorway for a moment before entering the bar properly. He stumbled slightly as he walked, clearly already drunk. Tony was surprised the bouncer outside hadn’t noticed. 

Tony followed him across the room with his eyes until he came to lean heavily on the bar top and requested a drink. From his position, Tony couldn’t accurately overhear the exchange, but it appeared that the barkeeper was refusing him. A dark scowl marred the man’s otherwise handsome features, and he tried again, loud enough this time for Tony to hear the slur in his British accented words. Still, the barkeeper refused, having worked long enough to know how to deal with drunkards. 

Deep in his mind, Tony felt a pang of sympathy. It was a position he had been in many times before, and a part of him wondered what had driven this man into this state.  

Tony’s body seemed to move without him telling it to do so, sliding off his seat and crossing to stand beside the man, earning himself a confused, though still dark frown. 

“Hey, Paul was it?” Tony asked the barkeeper who arched an eyebrow at him, “How about we make a deal? One drink, just one, on me, plus a large tip for yourself, and I’ll put him in a taxi, sound fair?”  

Paul eyed Tony for a long moment before rolling his eyes and turning away to get the drink. 

Tony flashed a smile at the man next to him who had lowered himself onto one of the nearby barstools and was propping his forearms on the bar, “You’re welcome.” 

“I didn’t ask for help,” the man said harshly, though he clasped the drink Paul placed in front of him with a fierce possessiveness. 

Tony raised an eyebrow, “Well, aren’t you an angry drunk.” 

“I’m not drunk,” the man growled, taking a large swig of his drink. 

“Uh huh…” Tony watched as the man lowered his drink to the bar and stared at it silently, looking very much like he was on the verge of hurling it against a wall. It did nothing but pique Tony’s curiosity, “Tony Stark,” he held out his hand to introduce himself. 

The man glanced at it out of the corner of his eye like it was the last thing he wanted to touch before looking back to his drink, blinking slowly, tiredly, “I know.” 

“You’re supposed to tell me your name,” Tony informed him, retracting his hand. He wasn’t surprised that the man already recognised him. He was a well-known figure throughout the city. One of the few CEO’s that actually made themselves the face of their company rather than hiring a team to do it for them. And he wasn’t exactly subtle in how he made his appearances, especially more recently. 

The man turned his head, an over exaggerated movement that he was barely in control of, “Why would I do that?” he asked, curiously, regarding Tony out of the top of those emerald eyes, glazed and distant from alcohol. 

“Because I want to know.” 

The man chuckled and looked back to his drink, “Well, can’t have someone not get what they want from me, can we?” he muttered, taking another mouthful. 

Tony frowned. He wasn’t sure the guy had meant to say that bit out loud, “So you gonna tell me?” 

The man shook his head, moving it a little too far to each side, “No.” 

“Aw come on, you’re not going to tell me your name even after I bought you a drink,” Tony tried his best puppy eyes. 

“Leave me alone,” the man grumbled, finishing his drink in one final swig and going to stand up. He wobbled dangerously, reached out to use the bar as support, missed and nearly dropped to the ground. Tony moved quickly and managed to slip an arm under the man’s shoulders before he hit the floor. 

“Yeah, ‘cause you’d do just great on your own,” Tony pointed out, lifting the man back onto his feet. He was surprisingly light, even for a guy of his height, and Tony couldn’t help but catch a whiff of expensive cologne and shampoo under the fog of alcohol. 

“Get off me,” the man hissed venomously and made a violent attempt to push Tony away, managing to get both his hands onto Tony’s chest and shoving. It was a forceful shove, given his condition, and Tony couldn’t help but notice a mix of emotions flicker across the guy’s face. Anger and suspicion that bordered on full-blown fear flashed across his features. 

Tony let go instantly. He could recognise an anxiety trigger when he saw one. Now that the guy was upright he seemed mostly stable. Tony just kept his hands close, just in case.  

 “I’m not gonna hurt you, big guy,” Tony replied, guiding him back into his seat, keeping one arm in place to steady the precarious swaying. He pulled his wallet out of his jacket with his free hand and tossed a few notes onto the counter. More than enough to cover the tab and the tip and then probably three more drinks. Tony just wanted to get the guy out of the bar before anything else pushed this guy to freak out, collapse or throw up. In his condition, he was probably dangerously close to any of those. Once he had tucked his wallet away, he turned to help the guy back onto his feet, only to find him staring intently at his face. 

“You’re very attractive,” the guy decided, matter-of-factly. 

Tony raised his eyebrows at the unexpected comment and gave a flirtatious smirk, “Well thank you, so are-“ 

“It wasn’t a compliment,” the man cut him off, dissipating Tony’s smirk immediately, and going to stand again. Tony helped him up, despite the new scowl on his face. This time, the man either didn’t react so violently. He made some incoherent protest but allowed himself to be supported. 

“Attractiveness isn’t a good thing?” Tony asked as he guided him out the door of the bar and into the cool night air. 

The man opened his mouth to reply but thought better of it, twisting out of Tony’s grip instead, as though only just realising he was still in it, “Can walk on my own!” he insisted, stumbling over his own feet and falling ungracefully to the pavement on his hands and knees. A soft groan fell from his lips, and he made no move to get up. 

Tony sighed as he watched with pity, seeing something of himself in the stubborn drunken man, swaying on all fours. After a moment, he crouched in front of the man’s head and offered a small, reassuring smile, “Hey, come on, let’s get you home.” 

The man lifted his head and narrowed his eyes at him suspiciously, “Why’re you helping me? What d’you want?” 

Tony shrugged, “I don’t want anything; I’ve just been in your position enough times to know when a guy needs help.” 

The man chuckled, a little too loudly, shifting his weight back until he fell onto his ass, gazing absently at his lap, “A lie and a false assumption. You can't know my position,” he said quietly, his voice suddenly thick with restrained emotion. 

Tony tilted his head, “It’s not a lie, I really can be empathetic sometimes. And not that I remember all of them, but I can certainly say I’ve found myself in a very similar position to where you are right now. Except I'm usually on my own.” 

At that, the man looked up and searched Tony’s gaze intensely, suddenly more lucid than he had been all the time they’d been together. His eyes flicked between Tony’s, looking for something. Tony found himself unable to look away. 

A note of confusion flickered across the man’s face, and he broke eye contact, “S’not a lie,” he whispered, finally to himself, but said nothing more about his ‘position’. After a second, he reached out to place a hand on the nearby building wall to support himself back to his feet. 

Tony stood along with him, watching carefully for any sign of him falling again, still incredibly curious about what his ‘situation’ was. It couldn’t be that bad, could it? Tony shrugged it off. There was no way he was about to get any answers from the guy in this state. He hadn’t even gotten a name for Christ’s sake. 

“So where do you live?” Tony asked conversationally, as the man took a moment to steady himself, placing a hand over his stomach. 

At the question, the man frowned and glanced around, before apparently realising he was supposed to be being surly and scowling at him, “Why the hell should I tell you?” he jabbed a finger in Tony’s direction, the force of which made him sway dangerously. But he remained upright. 

Tony stuffed his hands in his pockets and regarded the man with calm patience, a look he perfected from seeing it on the faces of Steve and Pepper so often, “Because, Captain Grouch, I’m going to take you home.” 

“I can ge’ home on m’own,” the man spat, attempting to take a step forward to prove his point, only to misjudge it and stumble sideways into the wall. 

Tony winced as he watched him rest against the wall, having lost the energy to even hold his head up himself and sighed, “I’m not going anywhere. So you can tell me where you live or you can pass out here on the street like some bum and-“ 

“I’m notaa bum!” the man hissed, violently. 

Tony paused at the sudden venom in his voice noting to avoid saying that again, “Ooook then, so you gonna tell me where you live? ‘Cause that’s the only option left; I swear not to sell your address to any third parties or send you any unwanted mail.” 

The man regarded him for several minutes, while Tony presented his most trustworthy smile and waited patiently. Hurrying a drunk guy, especially one as stubborn as this one, would get him nowhere. He knew that well enough from his own experiences of being himself. 

Eventually, the man gave up his address. Tony’s eyebrows rose. He lived upmarket. Just by looking at the guy, he hadn’t guessed that he was that well off. He was only wearing a pair of dark skinny jeans, a dark green t-shirt and a grey blazer. Comfortable, sure, but very wealthy? Tony just hadn’t made the assumption. 

“That’s not far from here,” Tony mused, glancing around to get his bearings before looking back at the man still leaning on the wall. His eyes had drifted closed, “You gonna let me help you walk, or do you and the pavement want to get better acquainted?” 

The man blinked tiredly but didn’t lift his gaze. He was well past partaking in Tony’s quips, “Jus’ keep quiet on the way.” 

“No promises,” Tony replied, smiling as he stepped round to the man’s side and looped an arm around his waist, lifting the man’s arm over his shoulders with his free hand and gripping it around the wrist, taking his weight easily. 

The man made no attempt to get away, but simply leant his weight against Tony, head lolling a little. His energy was almost entirely gone. 

The walk back was slow, made difficult by Tony’s poor sense of direction and the man’s inability to walk in a straight line. Most of the journey was spent in silent, but Tony found himself unable to stay quiet, making random pointless observations or checking to make sure the man wasn’t about to throw up all over his shoes or every now and then making a guess of the man’s name. 

He was always wrong. Or at least, the man didn’t respond. 

Eventually, they came to the glass revolving door of a tall, swanky apartment building that could have rivaled Stark Tower itself and the two of them stopped in front of it upon Tony’s new friend’s indication. 

“Nice place you got here,” Tony commented, helping the man negotiate the revolving door as he dug around in the pocket of his jeans for a set of keys. 

The reception area was equally grand as the outside. The large room had a high, wooden desk to one side, manned by a middle-aged woman who looked too tired to even pretend to be polite. On the wall opposite her was a square set of shelves, each with a pile of mail laid on it. At the far end, three elevators stood side by side, ready to transport the residents to their floors. 

The concierge looked up from the magazine she was reading as the man made a wild, pointless gesture. Tony offered a small, reassuring smile and she went back to reading, happy she wasn’t going to have to deal with a drunken resident. 

“You’re not coming up,” the man informed him, seriously, once again pointing a finger in Tony’s direction once he had twisted out of his grip. He seemed to have sobered up enough on the walk to enunciate correctly and stand on his own feet. 

Tony held up his hands in a gesture of peace, smirking. Now that he knew the guy was safe and home, he could acceptably find the situation amusing. “Didn’t expect anything less from a guy who hasn’t even told me his name,” he placed a hand on his heart and gave a small salute, “Just wanted to make sure you passed out in a place with heating,” he flashed a grin and turned to leave, stuffing his hands in his pocket. 

He had his hand on the revolving door when the man spoke again. 

“Loki.” 

Tony stopped and looked over his shoulder, mild confusion on his face, “Bless you?” 

“My name,” the man said, hesitantly, like he was giving up his greatest secret, “it’s Loki.” 

They regarded each other for a while before Tony nodded his head, “I’ll take that as a thank you,” he smiled warmly and walked from the building, head held high. 


	2. Chapter 2

The sharp ding signalling the arrival of the elevator struck Loki’s hangover deep. He screwed his eyes shut and made a concerted effort to ignore his throbbing head and roiling stomach.  

There was no real telling how much he had drunk last night. He knew that after leaving the office the night before, likely not more than 12 hours prior to this very moment, he had returned home and polished off the half bottle of whiskey he had in his apartment. Then, deciding that that was not enough, he had made his way out to some of the nearby bars. Things got a little blurry after that. He was particularly ashamed of himself when his dazed thoughts came across the vague memory of having to be helped home by some stranger. He’d even told him his name.  

A new wave of tiredness washed over him. He rubbed his eyes with the thumb and forefinger of one hand before the doors slid open and he stepped out with what he could only hope was a confident, healthy looking gait.  

The man didn’t even look up from his computer. He was typing away at something or other, abnormally long fingers twitching efficiently across the keyboard. Loki wondered for a second whether this man’s finger length had been a deciding factor in his employment, he was struggling to list any other redeeming features.  

“You stink of alcohol,” the man rasped as the doors to the elevator sealed behind Loki.  

Loki knew that wasn’t true, but his appearance and personal hygiene had always been a button that this man knew to push if he wanted an immediate reaction. Loki forced himself not to react.  

“Rid yourself of the memories of what you did, have you?” the man finally left his computer and made eye contact, that horrible smile on his face.  

Loki had to clench his jaw at that. Of course he hadn’t, but he had deliberately not thought about it. Though now he wondered. What was his victim doing? How was he reacting to losing his life’s work? Did he even know yet... 

With a deep inhale, Loki shoved his thoughts to one side as he realised that he had fallen right into the trap that this man had wanted.  

“You said you had a new one for me,” Loki stated flatly. His head and his stomach threatened to spill over as he spoke but he fought the feeling.  

The man gave his death rattle of a laugh and leant down to unlock one of the drawers behind the desk. Loki didn’t see and once again was happy not to know the contents of this man’s desk, it could not be pleasant, “Stark Industries has been unusually quiet in recent months.  We believe that they are in the early stages of working on something significant.” 

A frown flickered across Loki’s forehead. Why was that so familiar? Of course, everyone knew Stark Industries. You couldn’t go outside in New York without seeing the Tower rising into the skyline. Its notorious history of weapons development had more recently turned to philanthropy and clean energy generation created an interesting debate around redemption and whether a bold new direction can really erase the sins of the past.  

But no, that wasn’t it. It felt as though Stark Industries had been on the forefront of his mind for a little while, but he just could not place why.  

The man eventually sat back up, as much as his hunch would allow, and tossed a manila folder across the desk. Loki flipped it open on the desk and found the answer to his conundrum grinning up at him from the first page.  

That blurry memory of the irritating man who had had to almost carry Loki home the previous night came into sharp, nauseating focus as he looked down on the candid photograph of Tony Stark paperclipped to the first of a number of sheets of A4.  

“We want whatever it is that he is working on,” the man interrupted Loki’s storming thoughts, not making them any better. When he didn’t reply, the man continued, “Is there a problem, Laufeyson?” 

Loki swallowed and placed a hand over his stomach, “No, of course not.” 

“Good,” the man reached over and lifted the sheets in the folder, revealing the details some form of charity gala in a printed email, “We know he will be attended an event this evening. You will make contact with him there and give us a report tomorrow morning.” 

Loki nodded silently, not trusting his stomach to remain still should he open his mouth. It didn’t seem like they knew where he had been last night or, more importantly, who he had spoken to, Loki told his rising panic. This could be dealt with, this  _had_ _to be dealt with_.  

“Laufeyson!” the man was sharp and loud. It struck a chord in Loki’s stomach, sending waves of fear across his skin, raising it into goosebumps and overshadowing anything he had felt about the situation. His head snapped up and his back straightened immediately. He kept his gaze lowered doing his best to keep his breathing normal, “You will listen to me and answer when I am speaking to you!” 

“Yes of course,” Loki replied quickly. Though he stopped short of apologising. 

“Do not forget where you came from,” the man smiled when he got the reaction he was looking for, easing back into his chair slightly, “Do you understand the assignment?” 

“I do.” 

“Then be gone,” the man wafted a hand and turned away from him.  

Loki didn’t hesitate. He snatched the file from the desk and turned for the elevator already opening behind him. As soon as the doors closed, blocking him from sight of that man, Loki slumped forward, resting his forehead against the cold metal of the door. His stomach boiled and cramped and it was all he could do not to throw up as the lift took him back to the ground floor.  

What was he going to do? Well maybe take steps to stop drinking first of all. It was going to get him killed at this rate. Stark Industries was a direct rival to Thanos in both size and influence, it was just that Thanos was much less public facing. It meant that Loki would have to be very careful. If Stark suspected anything it would be easy for him to ruin Loki in much the same way as Thanos could. And Loki was starting this incredibly difficult endeavour having to deal with the fact that Stark already knew his real name, a fact he usually did absolutely everything to avoid giving out. 

He tried not to think about it until he was back out in the open air. Not that the air of New York on a summer’s afternoon was particularly refreshing. It felt thicker than usual, but at least it wasn’t the office. He walked down the street for a little way and found an unoccupied bench where he could cradle his head for a minute and figure out what he was going to do.  

Once his head and stomach stopped throbbing, he started to think a little straighter. His first step was to figure out exactly what had happened last night and how much Mr Stark already knew. Loki could remember giving his name, but other than that he couldn’t be sure. It was the uncertainty which was worrying.  

He flicked through the folder, careful to hide the picture of Mr Stark, it was probable that anyone waking around him would know who it was. There were pages on the company, its structure, its board members, its leaders, organised into a chart, following by specific profiles on each of them. Then it moved into the work that Stark Industries was involved in, some of its major public projects and some which Loki suspected it was illegal to know existed. That didn’t bother him. He was well out of the ‘law-abiding citizen’ category anyway.  

What did strike Loki as odd was that there was little to no information on what his actual target was. It seemed that Thanos was working on the assumption that Stark being quiet meant that he was up to something. Which may well have been true but it only served to make this situation even more complicated.   

Loki hung his head a little and took a couple of deep breaths as a fresh wave of nausea washed over him. He glanced sideways, momentarily judging the distance to a nearby bin.  

But it passed relatively uneventfully and Loki turned to the final page of the folder to where there was the information about the gala. It was a fundraiser for something, being hosted by Stark Industries at their properties out in far reaches of the city’s limits.  It was the kind of environment in which Loki was familiar, but how Stark might react to seeing the drunken man who he stumbled back home meeting for the second time at such a different setting, was difficult to predict. And he only had an afternoon to do plan it.  

With a sigh, he stood and hailed a cab. There was no way he would be able to walk back in his current state.  

*********** 

The ‘party’ was in full swing.  

The charity auction had just finished with an array of art and furnishings passing through, donated by various individuals or companies with equally varying ulterior motives. Several million donated in total. Tony couldn’t knock that really, though there was the lingering feeling that this was pittance to the men and women in the crowd. Many of them had just given less than 1% of their spare change and that was only because they got something in return. Tony couldn’t make too much of a stance on it publicly however. His history was a little too marred to be able to try and stand up as a paragon of change in society.  

The charity benefitting from this was a key beneficiary of Stark Industries and Steve Rogers had actually organised this event so Tony had to show his face and pretend to be interested. But realistically, he was more interested in his teams that actually went to the people that needed the help, installing the systems that kept them happy and healthy and safe, not one of the rich socialites who liked to boast about their endless social activism to their friends.  

This whole thing reminded him too much of himself a decade ago. In fairness, unlike his former self, at least these people pretended to care. 

The auction crowd was slowly dissipating and classical music had started flowing through the air from the string quartet tucked into an alcove to one side of the room. The suited men and gowned women began to drift amongst each other as focus moved away from the stage where Tony was stood, to each other and the rounds of idle small talk and ‘networking’ began. Waiters began moving through the people with silver trays of champagne, one of whom peeled off to present his selection to Tony as he descended the stairs. Tony accepted the glass which appeared to be the fullest and nodded his thanks.  

He polished it off quickly, and realised it wasn’t going to be quite enough to survive this evening. With a quick assessment of potential pathways, he began to make his way to the bar at the back of the room.  

It took several minutes to get there. Being not only the organiser of the event, but the CEO of Stark Industries which was still in the later stages of attempting to shake its infamous history, meant that most if not all of the attendees wanted his ear. Tony managed to brush off most of them with a nod, a smile or a handshake of thanks before moving on. There was the odd person who managed to collar him and commence a conversation about share prices, or stock holders or something similarly boring to Tony. He only obliged them where they had been one of the top donors in the auction. It was expected in a way. But eventually, the conservation would turn to the subject of his work and ‘what’s next for Stark Industries?’. As soon as that came up, Tony would laugh, mutter top secret and quickly move on.  

Usually Tony made a point of being explicitly open and forthcoming with information on what he and his business were working on. A move to counteract the impacts of Stark industries secretive weapons manufacturing of the past. But he knew what he was doing now was a dangerous technology that no one should really be able to know the workings of. It irritated him to have to hide something he was so proud of, but needs must.  

Getting a drink would never have been so complicated at home.  

Once he had finally reached his destination, he leant his elbows on the white marble bar top and requested a bourbon on the rocks from the barman who came to greet him. It was in his hand less than ten seconds later. He took a sip and sighed. He had chosen this bourbon personally and it was good. Finally able to relax a little, he turned to face the crowd, resting his elbows on the bar behind him.  

No, definitely not his scene anymore, he concluded. When he was younger he had relished opportunities like this to boast, show off, show that he wasn’t his father and he could be better. The incident in the desert had changed everything.  

He rubbed his eyes and shook his head. Now was not the time to revisit that. The thoughts were pushed aside and boxed up. He had a session on Friday, he could deal with them then.  

When he looked back to the crowd, he was immediately distracted.  

Moving through the crowd towards the bar not too far away was the last person he expected to see again, let alone at his gala. A well-tailored, black suit that was accentuated by a green and gold scarf that matched his tie had replaced the jeans and t-shirt. The black hair that had, the previous night, been scruffy and unkempt was now brushed and styled back over his head. But there was no mistaking those features. Loki hadn’t seemed to notice Tony as he moved patiently through the people, at ease in the crowd. He handed out smiles and handshakes as he passed individuals but never really stopped to make conversation.  

Tony twisted to hide his as Loki emerged to lean on the bar a little way down, immediately grateful that Steve and Pepper had forced him to attend this.  

He waited until Loki had ordered a drink before sliding closer.  

“I am loving the scarf,” Tony commented, watching for a reaction. There was no telling whether Loki even remembered him in the state he had been in and it wasn’t going to be Tony to embarrass him with that information unnecessarily.  

It didn’t look like he had to worry though because as he spoke, the corner of Loki’s mouth lifted a little and he closed his eyes for a second before turning to look at him, mirroring his stance, one arm resting on the bartop. There was definitely recognition there.  

“The whole outfit just works,” Tony continued, “You’ll have to give me the name of your tailor. What is that? Italian?” 

“British actually,” Loki replied, with his accent that sounded as good as he looked, “It’s good to see you again Mr Stark. I wasn’t sure whether I would be able catch you at such an event. I must admit I am rather embarrassed that the memory of our first encounter is a little...fuzzy. But I know that thanks are in order.” 

Tony chuckled, “I thought as much. Can’t say you could exactly walk the straight and narrow. Don’t thank me, just doing what I would’ve wanted someone else to do,” Tony waved it off and changed the subject. There can’t be too many happy reasons for a guy to get into that state and Tony’s mood was now too good to want to ruin it, “Now, I can’t say that I memorise my guestlists, but I reckon I would have remembered your name popping up. Can I ask in capacity you are attending? Business? Philanthropic? Avid fan? Professional stalker?” 

“I suppose that would depend on what you prefer,” Loki chuckled over the lip of his glass as Tony struggled for a response, replacing it on the bar before finishing his sentence, “In all honesty, I’m here as a plus one. Very last minute.”  

A shot of disappointment cannonballed into Tony’s good mood. It must have shown on his face because Loki laughed again and continued.  

“A plus one in a purely professional capacity Mr Stark, do not fret.” 

“Well that is a relief,” Tony smiled. For a moment he considered telling him to use his first name, but decided he liked the way Mr Stark sounded in his clipped accent. Instead he tilted his head, “I’m curious about something.” 

Loki merely raised his eyebrows in question.  

“Where is that name from?”  

“It comes from old Norse mythology. Loki was the god of mischief in the Viking pantheon of gods. I imagine my parents must have known who I would grow up to be,” he gave a grin that aptly fit his name.  

At that, Tony made a decision, finished his drink immediately and clapped his hands together, “This party is putting me to sleep, and I have a couple of bottles back at Stark Tower that are just screaming after-party so how about you and I-” 

Loki cut him off as he inhaled through his teeth, “That is a tantalising offer Mr Stark, but sadly one that I must decline. I have a meeting in...” he checked the watch strapped to his wrist, “Forty-five minutes, and it would not do to be late.” 

Tony couldn’t help but be a little bitter as he replied. It was rare for him to be turned down. It was an irritating feeling, “What? You work for owls or something? It's nearly midnight.” 

Loki’s eyes creased as he smiled, “Nothing so mystical. My client is based in Europe and has certain particulars around time keeping.” 

“It’s big then, the company you work for,” Tony asked curiously. He had realised that all he knew about this guy was that his that his parents could see that impish grin on his face even as a new-born.  

“Oh yes,” Loki responded, lifting his chin a little in what seemed a forced gesture. Was he uncomfortable talking about his company?  

Tony raised an eyebrow. This was a curiosity. Tony loved curiosities, “Would I have heard of them?” 

“Probably,” Loki gave a smirk. 

“You know I could easily just find out.” 

“Then why would I tell you,” the comeback was laced with victory that Tony had to concede.  

Tony glared playfully at him, content that Loki did not appear to merely be brushing him off. If that was the case, the man would have disappeared already, not hung around for this verbal jousting match. After a few minutes of a silent staring contest, in which Tony was not exactly keeping his thoughts in the ‘safe for work’, he shrugged with as much nonchalance as he could muster.  

“Rain-check on the after party then?” 

“Rain-check,” Loki agreed, although the phrase sounded practically foreign in his accent, “Though it strikes me that surely there must be a party before there can be an afterparty?” he asked, the glint in his eye telling Tony it was less a passing question. More a request.  

“I’m sure I could arrange something.” 

“I don’t doubt it,” Loki grinned that impish grin as he stood upright fully, “Now, sadly, you must excuse me Mr Stark. It was a pleasure meeting you. Properly this time.” 

“Likewise,” Tony replied lifting his drink in farewell before hesitating as he realised something, “Wait, have you got a card or something. I’ll need it for the guest list.” 

Loki laughed, “If you need a card to find me, Mr Stark, then I fear I may have underestimated you.” He gave Tony one last, lingering gaze that swept up and down his body before smiling softly to himself and moving into the crowd.  

Tony was left watching him go, needing a moment just to reign his thoughts back into some kind of reasonable order. Once he was calm enough to think straight, he made sure that Loki was out of his immediate eyeline before hurrying along the wall to towards a flight of stone stairs which lead up to a balcony overlooking the main room. He couldn’t have Loki knowing how eager he was to see him again. Once he was in position, he pulled his phone out of his pocket and held it up to the crowd, quickly opening the camera as he searched the people’s faces. It wasn’t long before he spotted Loki’s dark, distinctive hair and snapped a photo as he turned to speak briefly to someone he passed. Once he had the shot, Tony spun away quickly in case Loki looked up. As he did, a brief thought crossed his mind. Was this stalking? No, it was a challenge. Tony Stark didn’t stalk anyone.  

“Jarvis,” he said quietly, not wanting anyone nearby to overhear too much, “Get me everything you can on this guy.” The photo was uploaded to his phone’s JARVIS connection as he spoke.  

“Right away sir,” came the calm reply.  

With the acknowledgement given, Tony tucked his phone away and twisted slightly to watch as Loki hesitated in the exit to look over his shoulder. After a second, his gaze fell on where Tony definitely wasn’t hiding and lingered. Finally a grin came across his face and he left the building.  

********** 

As soon as Loki was outside in the cool night air, he let his mask drop. The smile slipped away and with it went the tension in his shoulders and the rigidity of his spine. The evening had been a relative success. He had manoeuvred himself well through the uncertainty of their prior meeting and had even established plausible reasons for odd working hours and potentially a second meeting. Though he was no closer to finding out what his target actually was. There had been no mention of it at all during the gala and Loki had been surprised when Tony hadn’t used it as a boasting chip in their exchange. This would be a long-term job. How long exactly, he would work out tomorrow. Right now, he just wanted to go back to the apartment, away from anyone and everyone.  

He handed a valet the stub of his ticket and waited patiently for his car to be brought round. A sleek silver sports car. Loki wasn’t sure of the make and it didn’t bother him. He hadn’t chosen it, it wasn’t even really his. It was another piece of Thanos property loaned to him for appearances' sake. Loki thanked the valet and handed over the customary tip before entering his car.  

He waited until he was well out onto the road before making the call. It was answered as quickly as ever but there was no greeting given from the other end. This was usual and Loki continued anyway.  

“I’ve made successful contact,” he stated flatly as he tugged his scarf off and started on working his tie loose, “I will give a full initial assessment tomorrow.” 

Without waiting for a response, he hung up.  

********** 

Tony hadn’t stayed for too much longer after Loki had left. The one and only thing that had made the night interesting had come and gone and he couldn’t see much more topping it.  

Steve Rogers was waiting for him in his penthouse as Tony stepped out of his left. Did the man ever sleep?  

“How was it?” Steve asked as Tony strode out of the elevator, into his penthouse, flinging his jacket to one side barely sparing his PA a second glance. 

“Dull,” he replied simply, stopping in the middle of the room and clapping his hands together, “What have you got for me, Jarvis?” he called loudly, “And please tell me nudity is involved," came the muttered afterthought as he crossed to the table top that acted as a physical interface with the AI. 

Steve rolled his eyes as he bent to pick up Tony’s jacket, watching out of the corner of his eyes as Jarvis threw up a large camera photo of a tall, blacked haired man, before it was quickly shrunk back and followed by various pieces of texts and other photos, thrown into the air in a haphazard fashion. Raising an eyebrow, Steve stepped forward to inspect the picture closest to him. 

“So boring you had to resort to stalking huh?” he commented. 

“It’s not stalking,” Tony retorted, lifting his hands to enlarge one of the few photos Jarvis had provided and stepped back to look at it through narrowed, scrutinizing eyes, “It’s...research,” he continued in a distracted tone before flicking the photo back into the wall of information and pulling forward a couple of the pieces of text. 

“His name is Loki Laufeyson,” Jarvis announced, “It appears there is little information about him. He has virtually no online presence.” 

Tony scowled, sceptically, “No facebook? Twitter? Drunken youtube video?” 

“Nothing of the sort sir.” 

“A man after my own heart,” Tony muttered with a small smile, flicking through the photos, mostly taken at the kind of soiree from which Tony had just come. There were none of him in anything other than a well tailored suit and tie, talking with many dignitaries that Tony recognised as well as quite few he knew personally. It was strange how a man so well connected was so unknown. 

“Except you have a few youtube videos," Steve input, but Tony ignored the jibe, “Let me guess, some guy refuses to give you his phone number, so you decide to go for every single detail ever published about him online. Don’t handle rejection well do you?” Steve asked, smirking to himself. 

Tony gave a sarcastic laugh and shot a glare over his shoulder, before turning back to frown at the information, “Who’s he work for?” 

There was a brief pause as Jarvis searched, “His last listed employment was in an undisclosed position at Asgard Corp. However, he left six years ago due to an unspecified disagreement with the CEO. After that, there is no information.” 

“Mr. Blake might know him,” Steve mused. 

“If the internet doesn’t know I doubt out friend Thor would. Asgard isn’t exactly the smallest of companies,” Tony muttered to himself, frowning as he continued to flick through the information. Loki worked for someone big. Or did he? God of mischief probably wasn't beyond a little lie. Tony couldn't help but smirk. 

“Still, you should ask him at the meeting tomorrow,” Steve told him, pausing for a reaction and scowling when he didn’t get one, “You do know you have a meeting with Mr. Blake tomorrow don’t you?” 

Tony made a non-committal grunt, a noise which Steve had come to recognise as his cue to let the guy have some time alone. He gave a quiet goodnight, laid Tony’s jacket over the back of a nearby chair and took his leave. 

With a sharp exhale, Tony centralised the photos and leant back onto the back of the sofa behind him, folding his arms across his chest. 

Loki Laufeyson was a very interesting fellow indeed. There weren’t many people who were able to keep themselves almost entirely off the internet. Especially all those deep, dark corners that most computers couldn’t get to without some substantial software. Of course, Tony had some of the most substantial software known to man. 

“Steve!” he called, only turning when he got no answer, completely unaware that his PA had left the room. With a put out scowl, lifted his chin, “Jarvis send Steve up here.” 

A few minutes of studious silence passed as he flicked through some of the few passages about this Loki. There weren’t many. His name was listed on a few high end events that Tony wasn’t even invited to, but then it was missing off those that Tony openly refused to go to. The only other mentions of him anywhere else was on a couple of magazine mailing lists – mainly small publications that Tony had never heard of - to an apartment in a particularly high class part of town. Whoever this guy worked for, they paid upmarket. Even with that, though, his name didn’t come up on any lease or deed that was published online. 

“You rang, Tony?” Steve interrupted his thoughts from behind with an exasperated tone to his voice. 

Tony raised his eyebrows as he turned, “Keep up that attitude and you’re not coming to my party.” 

Steve frowned, “What party?” 

“This Friday,” Tony announced, “Here. House party. Invite everyone we know.” 

Steve blinked, taking a second to process whether his boss was actually being serious or not, “That’s the day after tomorrow, Tony. You have a meeting with Thor Friday morning.” 

“Invite him,” Tony replied flippantly, “I’m sure Mr. Blake would have a most merry time!” he took on his best impression of man’s booming voice before grinning at Steve only for it die when he saw that he wasn’t sharing his mirth. 

Steve opened his mouth to argue, thought better of it and raised his hands in a gesture of surrender, leaving again without another word. Tony smirked to himself spinning back to face the wall of information in front of him. 

“One last request Jarvis, since you’ve let me down on workplace, video and nudity, get me a phone number,” he asked, throwing his arms forward, waiting for Jarvis to pull it out of the text. 

“Got one, sir.” 

Tony grinned. 

 


	3. Chapter 3

Loki was sat forward in one of the firm leather armchairs that furnished the second bedroom his apartment. No, that wasn’t right. It wasn’t truly was  _his_  apartment. It belonged to one of Thanos’s smaller businesses and Loki had been graciously allowed to stay there. If only for appearances’ sake.  

It was a high-end building close to central park, a large renovated structure from the early 1900s built from carefully crafted stone which stood in defiance of the metal and glass that threatened to swallow it. The apartment itself was deceptively large. Set over two floors, there two double en-suite bedrooms on the upper floor, and on the lower floor, an open lounge dominated the space, with a well-equipped kitchen and dining room separated from it. The ceilings were high with windows to match. The décor was modern and simplistic, enough to show wealth but sparse enough to indicate class.  

In Loki's opinion, it was fine, but it wasn’t his. He paid none of the bills and his name wasn’t on the lease. For all intents and purposes, Loki didn’t live there. It was just another part of his work. When you were dealing with executives and CEOs, it was necessary to have the evidence to back up claims. This was just one more thing that could be taken from him at a moment’s notice. 

He sighed as he picked up one of the array of papers that were spread out over the table in front of him. It consisted mostly of his own scribbled notes on Tony Stark, part of the research he had undertaken before going to the gala the previous night. He looked from the paper up to the wall opposite where he was sat, on which he had pinned the documents that had been in the manila folder that he had been given the previous day. 

Stark would be a different mark than most. Most could be coerced into spilling almost everything in just a few conversations on the right topics or – as was the case for a surprising number – the promise of a few nights of pleasure. Tony Stark would require something more. He was too silver-tongued to be caught out by clever words and twisted topics, and he was too sure of himself to resort to impressing his target with boasting. He knew that if someone wasn’t interested in Tony Stark the man, he wouldn’t be hard pressed to find someone that was. 

Of course that didn’t mean Stark would give up at the slightest hindrance. The man enjoyed a chase, if only a little one. To get to Stark’s secrets, Loki had to be more than a one night stand. 

Six months, minimum. That’s how long Loki estimated it would take to achieve his goal. Their initial encounter had not been as productive as Loki would have liked. The tabloids would have you believe that the weapons giant turned philanthropic, clean energy magnate was an open book, taking any and every opportunity to get his name in the headlines. Loki had believed it too, until he had met the man the previous night.  

Well, met formally. He had decided not to acknowledge their first meeting.  

Contrary to expectations, Loki had learnt nothing from Stark about his life or his work in the conversation they had had. The only things about Stark that Loki knew for certain was what he had discovered in his research.  

Tony had had to step into the large shoes of his father at a young age, but had by all accounts flourished. Stark Industries had grown exponentially under his leadership and its weapons became a household name like no other before it. That is until just a couple of years ago. During a demonstration in Afghanistan, Stark had been kidnapped.  

Loki didn’t know too much of the detail. At the time, it barely crossed his radar, his own life had been in a too dark a place for him to think of much else. But he learnt that Stark had been held for around three months before escaping. The details of his escape had been largely classified by the military and Stark himself had never spoken about it publicly. What was public was that the moment he came back, Stark singlehandedly dismantled Stark Industries weapons manufacturing. Stocks had plummeted, a significant portion of the managing directors quit on the spot, there were rumours of bankruptcy.  

But to Stark’s credit he was undeterred and since then, the reformed company had gone from strength to strength.  

He could see that Stark was a man who allowed his reputation to speak for him and was content to let the world believe what they would. Loki couldn’t help but admire the man. It was this fame that Tony had been relying on while flirting the previous night. But a one-night stand would not be enough for this project. Tony was not so stupid as to hide his life’s work in a USB stick taped to the back of a drawer. Loki needed to become someone that Tony trusted, someone that would break through that constructed personality to the man who was hiding behind it. That would take time, but exactly how much he couldn’t be accurate. In his research, there was little information on any significant other in Stark’s past which only added to his uncertainty.  

He exhaled as he took another sip of coffee, picked up his mobile with his free hand and dialled the number. As it rang he set it to loudspeaker and replaced the phone on the coffee table before him.  

The phone rang once before it was picked up. Not that anyone greeted him, but Loki was used to that now. The man had never been one for wasted words, especially not on Loki and he knew that Thanos would never be the one to answer the phone. Thanos had other things to be concerned with. Loki was nothing on his radar. That man was always the mediator. Loki wasn’t sure which was worse, having to continue with this man for the foreseeable, or ever becoming enough of a problem that Thanos personally took an interest. He had a feeling that if Thanos was ever to deal with Loki himself, it would be the end.  

“Six months,” Loki stated flatly. He knew the man would know what he was referring to, these early stages of the project were always the same. A target was given, Loki would track them down for an initial assessment and then report back his estimated time. Over the years, he had learned to read a person very quickly. It was sickening how accurate he could be.   

There was pause from the other end of the line before the rasped reply came, “One moment.” 

Loki took another sip of coffee as he waited patiently for the man to relay his estimate to Thanos for approval. He always did for anything more than a couple of weeks. They rarely questioned his timings anymore, they were invariably accurate, but Thanos may decide that it was not worth the time. This was the longest project Loki had estimated since his ‘employ’ had begun.  

It was about 5 minutes before the man returned.  

“Done,” he growled, “weekly reports are required.” With that he hung up.  

Loki blinked in surprise. It was rare that he got the full time he asked for. In most cases, Thanos would slash the time given by a third and expect a return. Either this was more difficult than Loki had appreciated or there was some additional obstacle that Thanos had not deigned to share with him.  

Not that it mattered, he would deal with any obstacle that arose. He drained the last couple of mouthfuls of his coffee and sat back in his chair, regarding the wall opposite intently.  

The papers from the dossier the man had given him had little information of much use right now, some information on Stark Industries, its history, its board, its financial reports, quite basic information that Loki could have gotten himself in a couple of days internet searching. The only documents that interested Loki were the profiles of the employees considered to be of Tony’s inner circle. There were 5 in total, two personal assistants Steve Rogers and Pepper Potts, two personal security Natasha Romanov and Clint Barton, and Tony’s science chief, Bruce Banner. Their histories were more varied that Loki could have possibly imagined but all seemed to share the theme of redemption. This in itself told Loki something about Tony. He was attracted to people who needed a second chance.  

There was an angle there perhaps.  

Loki placed his initial notes sheet in the top left corner of the area of wall, pinning it in place and taking a step back. This would likely be the hardest project that Loki had undertaken to date. Not only in terms of completing his goal but emotionally.  To immerse yourself into someone’s life so fully, so completely, only to explode away from it at their weakest moment, taking everything they had with you...Loki swallowed then exhaled forcefully, reminding himself that there was no choice.  

Tony would survive if he lost this game. Loki would not.  

He remained in the room until well into the afternoon, making notes and plans, erasing them and replacing them, building and demolishing different parts of a personality that he thought Tony would follow into a something that the man, to his knowledge, had not been a part of before. There were too many variables yet to determine his exact approach, but that would come with time.  

Eventually, the claustrophobia that inevitably came with trapping oneself in a room with nothing but your plans to destroy the life of another forced Loki to find space. He left the room, locking it behind him and tucked the key into his jeans pocket. With nothing but his phone and his keys, he left his flat.   

****** 

So far, it had been a good day for Tony Stark.  

Having fulfilled the admittedly minor request of his PAs and attended the gala the previous night without any recordable incident they had allowed him a day of undisturbed workshopping. They had promised only to bother him if it was absolutely necessary. And as Tony ensured that he kept only the most competent staff close to him, he was pretty confident there was nothing that they would need from him today.  

His personal workshop was a large open space that occupied almost an entire floor of Stark Tower. Several long working tables were arranged around the room, some against the walls, some central to the space, all of which were specially designed for interfacing directly with Jarvis. A series of tools both advanced and mundane were set out neatly, organised into various stations dependant on what Tony needed. A single physical, largely redundant computer sat on a desk in one corner of the room. There were no windows. A security features suggested to him during construction. It didn’t bother Tony at all. In fact, in recent times, the open white space hidden from the world gave him a sense of security like nowhere else.  

Tony felt a number of small cracks in his spine as he finally sat upright from the workbench, lifting his goggles onto the top of his head with one gloved hand. He didn’t really know what time it was, but his back told him it had been bent uncomfortably for at least a few hours. Tony dropped the soldering iron he was holding onto the workbench with a satisfied sigh and wheeled backwards a little on his chair.  

“How’s it looking?” he asked, regarding his latest work sitting on the worktop before him, glowing a comforting blue.  

There was a moment of silent as a holographic line drawing formed in the air over his work, giving a technical outline of the work, stretched into its component parts. This had been his baby for almost a year, only moving into physical development in the last couple of months. Why he had been so reluctant to give this work a name, Tony wasn’t sure. Maybe it was because if he named it, then it would be acknowledging that it existed as more than just an idea. If it became a project, it could fail and he wasn’t sure he was ready for that. He had wanted to keep this work from being revealed for as long as possible. He wasn’t so naïve as to think that rumour hadn’t gotten out. But that didn’t mean he had to confirm or deny anything. 

That hadn’t stopped Steve and Pepper from affectionately referring to it as project Heart. Something to do with it being his first solo work since his return. Tony had made a small show of arguing the name but in truth he had quite liked it. Not that he would ever say that out loud.  

 The Heart throbbed gentle light over the counter under its holographic rendition.   

“Energy levels have improved, sir,” Jarvis replied in his familiar tone, “It looks as though you have fixed the transistor problems. However, there appears to be an area of significant overheating.” 

Tony hmmed to himself as he tugged off his thick soldering gloves and reached up to spin the hologram in a quick circle. A point in the back of the hologram glowed red, “Could be a misconnection. I’ll need your help with these Jarvis. We’ll have to go smaller on the circuits. Have we got any of that neodynium alloy we used in the armour cladding? That should resist the overheating better.” 

“I can check with Dr Banner, but the more immediate problem is-” 

Before he could finish, the Heart flashed once before giving a frazzled pop and extinguished. A plume of smoke trailed into the air. Tony’s shoulders slumped a little. 

“Bummer.” 

“Might I recommend that now would be a good opportunity to take a break,” Jarvis interjected, you have been in the workshop for almost eight hours.” 

With a deep breath, Tony conceded, “Sure. Any messages?” he asked, picking up the still warm bulb and tossing it up in one hand. He kicked against the counter top and wheeled across the room to separate table he kept by the redundant desktop. He set it down gently alongside the its five previous iterations.  

“Mr Rogers and Ms Potts wish only to assure you that there was nothing for you to attend to today, but would like to remind you of your scheduled office day tomorrow.” Tony sniffed at the concept, but Jarvis continued regardless, “Dr Banner reports that progress on the grid upgrades in Harlem have been successful, he will be able to give a full debrief tomorrow. Donald Blake has confirmed your meeting tomorrow morning and RSVP’ed for tomorrow’s party. He wished to pass on the message that he would like to know what he should wear.”  

He’d been so engrossed, he’d almost forgotten about his party, “No dress code. How many is that now?” 

“That is 54 confirmed attendees, another 50 left to confirm.” 

Tony pursed his lips and nodded to himself as he admired his progress table. The five fist sized bulbs of glass and metal lay in a neat line in various states of disrepair. There had been earlier versions but Tony hadn’t been able to salvage enough of them to warrant any display. He was getting so close to his answer. Two, maybe three more revisions and he would have it. 

A soft smile played at his lips as he regarded the table.  

“Call Mr Laufeyson will you please Jarvis,” Tony asked, picking up the earliest, largest version of the Heart and began tossing it from hand to hand.  

“Sir, it is close to 11pm.” 

Tony paused Jarvis’s point. He hadn’t realised it was so late. He had purposefully not put up any clocks in the room. It gave him a more plausible excuse when he conveniently missed meetings he wasn’t so keen on attending. “Call him anyway. He gives off a bit of a vampire vibe anyway.” 

The ringing that echoed through the room as the call struck a note of unexpected nerves. Was this too eager? It had been less than 24 hours. Was that bad? He couldn’t remember the last time he had made a call like this. His therapist would be so proud.  

“Good evening, Laufeyson speaking,” the deep distinctive voice he had come to recognise played well over Jarvis’s speakers as Loki greeted with an air of working formality. He probably did keep night hours then. 

“Do I meet your estimations?” Tony asked playfully.  

“Ah, Tony,” Loki replied, and Tony was pleased to note that that formality had been replaced with an easier, familiar tone. His reservations started to wilt away, “I was starting to worry you wouldn’t meet my challenge. Though I should have known that a man with your extensive talents would be able to find something so inconsequential as a phone number.” 

“Well, crisis averted,” Tony smirked, “Though I would note that it could be called rude to just walk off without giving a number. You’re lucky I’m even talking to you.” 

Loki’s chuckle echoed through the room, “I shall count my lucky stars.” 

“Please do, can’t guarantee how many there are now,” Tony confirmed, “In other news, I made that rain-check. Party, my place, tomorrow.” 

There was a short pause and Tony worried for a second. If nothing else, Steve would not let him live down being rejected twice in the same week. 

“So desperate to see me again are you?” 

“Don’t flatter yourself.” 

“I don’t have to, you do such a good job for me,” Tony could hear the smug smile in Loki’s voice.  

“Well actually, someone dropped out and I need to round out the numbers for...reasons. You know how it is,” Tony replied as flatly as he could manage, “Besides, you owe me an after-party.” Loki laughed over the phone and Tony paused to enjoy the sound before continuing, “So, you coming? Or do those owls need you in a meeting again?” 

“It would be my genuine pleasure to attend Tony.” 

“Excellent. 10pm sharp, my place. It’s the big one next to the Empire State Building. Can’t miss it. It’s got my name written in big letters on the side.” 

“I’m sure I’ll find it.” 

“Well then I’ll try and catch you there,” with that Tony hung up and exhaled a stressed breath he didn’t realise he’d been holding.  

He could be up for three good days in a row. Things were starting to look up.  

******* 

 Once the phone call ended, Loki lowered the phone to the kitchen countertop. He hadn’t expected the phone call so soon. It had ignited an instinctual reaction of fear. If it had been so easy to find that. What else could be uncovered with Stark’s technology? It was only two days in and Stark already knew the building he lived in, his phone number, and his real name. 

But for some reason, in the brief conversation, he found himself relaxing a little. There was clearly no suspicion in Tony. And so, Loki had found himself enjoying the back and forth. He had found genuine humour in the man’s words. It was almost...fun. It was only after a second that he realised the smile was still on his face. He had learned that the best way to fake emotions over the phone was to physically mimic the facial expression. But this smile had lingered. Was it real? 

A wave of guilt washed over him and he screwed his eyes shut, killing the smile. He could not allow himself to enjoy any of this. At all. He couldn’t afford to relax, or let his guard down.  

This was an act. A job. Tony was a target. And that is what Loki had to remember.  

He rubbed his eyes with his thumb and forefinger of one hand and looked up at the clock on the wall. It was 11pm, giving him around 26 hours to prepare for the party. For him, there was no such thing as ‘just a party’. Everything was work. And when so much hung on his success, there was no being too prepared. With a heavy sigh, he pressed a button on the coffee machine. It would be a long night.   


	4. Chapter 4

Tony’s ‘office’ days were always dull. It wasn’t that there was nothing to do. Quite the contrary actually. Since he was only present in his office for one day a week, and even that was reluctant, there was plenty left piling up for him to deal with while he was there. The problem was that it was all long, dry reports given by paper or a particularly enthusiastic colleague, interspersed with Steve and Pepper asking him to sign things. He rarely knew what he was signing and rarely asked. He trusted Steve and Pepper more than himself when it came to that side of things, but they would often need his approval for legal reasons. The only thing that kept him even a little bit sane was the hour he set aside for Peter, this year’s intern, and the literal therapy session that was regularly scheduled first thing on his office day morning. 

This particular office day was slower than usual. Peter was having a relatively dull day, although he did show off one or two of the little gadgets they had let him loose on in R&D. There were one or two thick reports deposited on his desk by Steve who had smirked at the look on Tony’s face before leaving. And Pepper had come in only the once with an invoice for him to scribble on. When he had asked if they were for the party that night she had just raised an eyebrow and given a firm negative. Someone was probably sorting that out. He was reasonably sure he had people for that...

It was mid-afternoon when there was a knock at the door. A knock indicated that there was someone for him to be meeting who maybe shouldn’t see what Tony actually got up to in his office while no one was around. 

Tony quickly wafted a hand to dissipate the holographic basketball and hoop Jarvis had put up for him and pulled his feet off the desk. Just as he had moved into a suitably professional position, the door opened, and Pepper leaned around it. She glanced around the room with a knowing smile before meeting Tony’s innocent gaze. 

“Dr Blake for you, Tony,” she announced. 

“Mmhm, yep, I know,” Tony lied, as he pretended to finish typing something on his computer, “Send him in.”

Pepper retreated, and Tony heard her say a few quiet words to someone. 

“You have my thanks, Ms Potts,” came the booming response. A moment later the source of the voice entered. 

Dr Blake, or Thor as Tony much preferred to call him, fit his pseudonym perfectly. He had been around the offices for a little while now and it appeared he had started to embrace Stark Industries’ dress-down Friday policy that Tony had implemented as a clause of his ‘office day’ agreement. His hair was tied up in a messy bun at the base of his head while jeans and a white t-shirt clung a little distractingly to his body. 

 “Good morning Tony!” he said, beaming, crossing the room in just four large strides. It took Tony at least nine. 

Tony stood and moved around the desk to meet him, reaching out to shake the man’s outstretched hand. He couldn’t help but wince at the grip, “Ah! So, is that just steel you can crush with that grip?”

Thor just laughed, “Give it time. Thank you for taking the time to sit with me. I know your time is valuable.”

Tony led him to where there were two small sofas set up around a low glass table and gestured for Thor to take a seat, “Coffee? Can you have coffee? I imagine you’re on some form of raw meat only diet,” he moved over to the coffee machine and pressed a button without waiting for a reply.

Thor chuckled, “I’m good, thank you, Tony.”

Tony nodded, stuffing his hands into his pockets as he watched the coffee flow smoothly from the machine into the cup waiting below, “Your loss, more for me. I’d offer you something a little stronger, but mom and dad took my secret stash not so long ago,” once the coffee was finished, he took the cup and seated himself opposite Thor, “So, how is everything going? You settling in alright?”

“I am, everyone has been incredibly welcoming,” Thor sat forward, and it was only then that Tony realised he had brought a folder with him. He hadn’t seen it tucked under the man’s massive bicep, “The team has pulled together a progress report for you to look at.”

Tony leant forward as the folder was slid across the table. He flicked through the pages idly. It looked unfortunately detailed. He glanced over the first page and then flipped it closed, “Thank you for what I expect is excellent bedtime reading,” he sipped his coffee, “I will read it and get back to you if I have any questions. But, while I have you here, something I wanted to ask. A bit off topic.”

“Of course, ask away.”

Tony was already tapping into the Jarvis interface built into the table, “Well it's not really a question to be honest. I met someone you might know. Tall guy, black hair, green eyes. Think he’s British, not sure. An accent like yours but not as loud.”

Thor’s eyes narrowed ever so slightly, “I fear I may not be able to help you, Tony. There have been many a colleague who has come and gone over my time at Asgard. I am sad to say, as much as I try, it is hard to remember everyone.”

“Humour me,” Tony replied. A second later, the head-shot Tony had taken two days prior was thrown up into the air. Tony regarded the photo for a second and then looked to Thor, gauging his response. 

The reaction he saw was unexpected, to say the least. Thor looked stunned. His mouth fell open a little, and his eyes had widened. 

“Loki...” his voice was barely audible, his eyes not leaving the photo in front of them. 

“Ah! You do know him?”

Thor closed his mouth finally and sat up straighter, peering at the photo, “When was this taken?”

“Wednesday.”

Something akin to relief flickered across Thor’s face. 

“I’ve known Loki since I was a boy,” he spoke without looking away from the photo, “We met when I was very young. We grew up together, went to the same schools. Life took us separate ways here and there, but we would always keep in touch. Eventually, we attended different colleges. However, when we graduated, my father didn’t hesitate to offer Loki employment at Asgard,” he paused, and Tony could only barely see the bob of his throat, “We were like brothers...” he trailed off, gazing up at the green-eyed Loki hovering in the air above him. 

“That was...not what I expected,” Tony quipped light-heartedly after a pause when he was sure Thor wasn’t going to continue. 

Thor turned and gave what he probably thought was a convincing smile, “How was he? Was he well?”

“Well there was actually two meetings, first time not so much well as...very drunk. But the second time he seemed pretty good,” Tony shrugged and leant back on the sofa, drinking his coffee, regarding Thor carefully. 

“That is good,” Thor nodded to himself, “I haven’t heard from him in so long, part of me feared the worst.”

Tony frowned for a moment, “Well I’d say he maybe needs to cut back on the binge-drinking but other than that he seems fine. In fact, you’ll even be able to check up on him yourself at the party tonight.”

Thor looked back to Tony for the first time, “He is attending?”

“Should be.”

“That is fantastic news, Tony,” he was grinning now, “It has been so long since I have seen him. If there is nothing further, I should go, there are only a few hours to prepare.”

Tony picked up the folder and waved it half-heartedly, “I’m sure it’s all in here. You go. I’ll catch you tonight.”

With that Thor, nodded and practically jogged out of the room. 

*****

It was at least half past ten when Loki pulled up outside Stark Tower. 

He straightened his blazer as he stepped out of the low car before tossing the keys to a young valet who had hurried forward the moment he had pulled up. Tony had probably hired them for his party. Impressive considering it had only been organised in just two days. As he approached the tall revolving door, he took a moment to check his appearance in the reflection of the glass. He’d gone for a more casual outfit for this evening. Dark jeans, white shirt, thin black tie, finished off with a grey, slim fitted casual blazer. His hair was slightly more out of place than the previous night, not unruly, but not as controlled either. He'd let it dry mostly naturally after his shower, and so some of its natural waves were still in place. It fell more forward than usual brushing the tops of his ears, and a few thick strands of his fringe were allowed to fall over his forehead. Satisfied with his appearance, Loki continued forward through the revolving door into the main lobby, pausing once he was inside to take in his surroundings. The reception was rather grand, yet modern, built of grey stone, steel and glass. 

Tony Stark had taste, Loki decided. 

“Mr Laufeyson, I presume,” a male voice called across the room, drawing Loki’s attention at the call of his last name. It was rare that anyone but those he worked for used it and it was quite the refreshing change. 

Loki stopped his scan of the room to find a man crossing the reception towards him in a smart, grey suit, neat blonde hair and a welcoming smile. One of Mr Stark’s employees, Steve Rogers, Loki remembered his photo from the folder. This was one of Tony’s personal assistants. He returned the smile, “Loki, please. I’m not especially fond of my family name.” 

The man nodded and smiled, “Of course,” he agreed, extending a hand once he was close enough, “Steve Rogers, Mr Stark’s P.A.”

“Personal assistant to Mr Tony Stark,” Loki said, announcing the job with a soft note of respect, taking the outstretched hand and giving a single shake before letting go, “You must be a commendable man to take on such a task.”

Steve smiled at the compliment, “He’s told me a lot about you,” Steve continued, gesturing for Loki to walk with him as he headed towards the back of the lobby and through a set of glass doors.

Loki narrowed his eyes momentarily, still smiling slightly, “Oh, I doubt that’s true,” he murmured as though a simple utterance to himself, but making sure it was easily audible to the man walking beside him, even as Loki moved his head to take in the signs and postings on the walls. 

Steve raised an eyebrow and looked at the man beside him, the movement drawing the attention of Loki’s gaze. It was rare that he found someone who matched his height. 

“He can’t talk about what he does not know,” Loki answered the unasked question, pushing one hand into his jeans pocket, the other hanging loosely by his side. 

“That hasn’t stopped him before,” Steve chuckled, bringing them to a stop beside the silver doors of a lift. 

Loki’s eyes creased, “So I’ve heard.” 

A short pause hung between them as Steve pushed the lift button while Loki considered Steve Rogers, knowing better than to let the silence draw out into awkwardness. If he was to get close enough to Tony he had to make sure the man wasn’t being warned off by his closest employees. It was almost certain that Steve would give Tony an assessment of him, and Tony would listen, “This is a remarkable building,” he noted eventually. 

Steve glanced up and around before nodding, “ Mr Stark had a direct hand in the design.”

“Really?” Loki asked with feigned surprise. Of course, he already knew, it was one of the first things he had come across in his research, “That is most impressive.”

Steve nodded, a slight but fond smile on his lips that was wiped as the elevator arrived and the doors opened. Loki had caught it though. There weren’t many that would talk of their bosses in such a way. Especially a personal assistant often tasked with their employer's least desirable jobs. Something that Loki had presumed came quite often in the service of Tony Stark, “he likes to have things his own way,” the PA continued, stepping into the lift, eyes going straight to the bank of buttons.

Loki ignored his quiet tang of unrest before following into the lift.  This was not the same building, he consciously reminded himself. This lift was not going there. “Of course, I imagine that causes you no end of irritation,” Loki commented, smiling conspiratorially as though the two were sharing an inside secret, “from what I’ve heard, Mr Stark can be quite the handful.”

Steve chuckled, but it was not the exasperated laugh of a man wearied by his work. “You can say that again,” he replied, facing the doors as they closed, “never a dull day though.”

Loki raised a curious eyebrow, “you enjoy it then? Working for Mr Stark?” he asked, watching the man intently for his reaction. To gauge him accurately, Loki needed more than just his words. 

The PA shrugged. “It has its moments,” he replied with a grin that told anyone who saw it that it meant so much more to him than Steve was ever going to admit. 

Suddenly, there it was. The first wave of guilt crashed over him. Loki simply gave a twitching smile and looked to his feet, searching the floor to keep his eyes averted. Those who had once known him would say how his eyes spoke volumes while his features were set and stony. It could be a problem at times if he were not concentrating wholly on the task at hand. The first surge of remorse was always easiest to brush aside, it took nothing more than a mental shrug and a quick flash of those double doors in his mind’s eye. Reminding himself of what he stood to lose.

Guilt wasn’t usually a problem in his projects. By the time it became debilitating, Loki had often delivered the secrets, and the matter would be washed off his hands. Tony Stark, however, was going to be particularly tricky. Loki was going to have to become a part of the man’s life. Live it with him. See what he loved and lived for. See what he was going to lose when Loki finally snatched it from him. 

A second flash of Thanos’s door was needed before he could lift his head again, glancing away from Steve. 

“I hope you don’t mind me saying,” Steve started, thankfully stealing Loki from his thought train, “You’re different to the kind of person Tony gets attached to.”

A single eyebrow arched with genuine intrigue, and he looked at Steve, “How so?”

“You just seem more...mature.”

Loki gave a breathy chuckle and looked forward again, “I shall take that as a compliment. I don’t know if this is true for Tony, but I’ve found that people often become attached to different people for what they wish to see in themselves,” he mused before looking back to Steve, “he is attached to you, for example. Is he not?”

There was a moment’s pause as Steve considered the idea before raising his eyebrows and nodding agreement, “Never looked at it that way before.”

The thump of a bass line could be heard even before the elevator came to a stop. It poured in when the doors opened up. Beyond was the semi-lit Penthouse, a wide-open room with the far wall made entirely of glass, giving a spectacular view of the city. The room itself seemed to be divided into two parts, the space that the elevator opened up onto, where guests stood in small groups laughing and joking amongst themselves, and then there was the area of floor that had been lowered a couple of feet, joined to its second half by a couple of small staircases. It created a makeshift dance floor where a throng of men and women were bunched together, moving in time to the thud of the music, the source of which was unclear. Loki couldn’t help but wrinkle his nose at it, reflexively, but shook the expression quickly. 

“I’ll have to leave you here,” Steve said apologetically.

“Of course, more people to greet,” Loki finished, waving off his need to explain.

Steve smiled, “It was good to meet you.”

Loki inclined his head, “You too, Mr Rogers,” he replied before stepping out into party, hands in his pockets, shoulders pulled back. 

His first encounter with an employee was less productive than Loki would have liked, but this was a job focused almost entirely on Tony Stark. This kind of job took time. 

Regarding the mass of people on the lower section of the room with aversion, Loki began to move around the hall towards the mahogany bar set against the wall on the raised floor. Being pulled into that was not something Loki would allow to happen. The mere thought was enough to twist his features into a grimace. He didn’t like to be touched at the best of times, so to be at the centre of something so enclosed and crowded was his idea of hell. 

The rest of the penthouse was exactly what Loki had been expecting. Suave, simple and elegant. No over the top furniture or brash designs, everything was dark wood, polished steel and glass. The few sofas and chairs were leather, already occupied by men and women either already partially intoxicated or resting from a period on the makeshift dance floor. So far, Tony Stark wasn’t to be seen. 

But then, Loki wouldn’t have approached him anyway. That wasn’t how this game was to be played. 

“What can I get you sir?” the waist-coated barman asked politely when Loki came to a stop in front of the bar. Yet another hired lackey brought in for just the evening. 

“Black Russian,” Loki replied, not paying attention as the drink was mixed, turning instead to the man a couple of years younger than himself who had leant on the bar beside him, grinning ignorantly up at Loki as though he had already agreed to go home with him, “I would strongly advise against what you plan to do.”

“Why’s that?” the man responded, smirking foolishly, “Worried you’ll say yes?” he continued, placing his hand over the one that Loki had been resting on the bartop.

Loki reacted before he had time to think, upturning his hand to grab the one that the man dared to put on his skin, twisting it back on itself and pushing it into the man’s chest, relishing the change in expression from smug to pained. Holding the hand in place as the man’s eyes took on a note a fear, Loki smirked and moved his head so that his lips were brushing the man’s ear, “I worry that you will,” with that, he stood upright and shoved the man backwards, releasing his hand. 

“Holy crap man,” he stammered, eyes wide as he cradled his pained wrist against his chest, “Calm down.”  

Loki simply glowered before the barman’s voice brought his attention to the drink on the counter. He regarded it for a second before looking at the barman out of the top of his eyes, “I’d appreciate it if no one was to know of that little incident,” he told him, pulling a note from his jeans pocket and holding it out.  

The barman nodded silently, taking the money and tucking it away in his trousers with an empty expression. 

 Loki smiled his thanks, taking his drink and moving off again, towards the door that led out onto the balcony curving around the outside of the building. He needed to place himself where he could be easily spotted. There was the odd person that cast him an inviting look, but Loki ignored them, walking with casual determination, enough to deter most. His encounter with the over-confident fool had left him a little on edge. He truly hated being touched without his permission. A control thing perhaps. Since there was nothing left of his life that was truly his, he could at least take comfort in knowing his body was still his. Just. 

Once outside, he dropped his shoulders and found himself relaxing. The loud music had dulled, and the masses of people reduced to just a few, babbling amongst themselves in groups of two or three, often smokers. Occasionally someone would break off to exchange a few words with Loki as he passed, but nothing so invasive as those within the building. He would politely return their interest before slipping away to an empty space on the glass wall of the balcony, looking out over New York. He had to admit one thing. Stark Tower did not disappoint. 

He sipped his drink and carefully considered how the rest of the evening was going to go. He most likely had around twenty minutes before Tony would approach even if he had already been spotted and-

His thought train was abruptly halted as a booming voice called his name. It was a voice he had never expected to hear again. Especially not here, not now. He looked out of the corner of his eye, trying everything not to move. Hoping, praying that he would assume he had the wrong person. 

A sickening twist wrought Loki’s stomach as he saw the unmistakable form of Thor moving through the crowd. Deliberately, determinedly. Straight for him. 


	5. Chapter 5

Panic laced through Loki’s thoughts. He had spent hours planning for every possible situation, what he would do, what he would say. He had back up plans for his contingencies. But nothing could have prepared him for this. For Thor. 

Loki felt a buried rage and fear throw itself at the intricate defenses he had built in his mind over the years, but with a deep breath, he quashed them once again. Now was not the time. He needed to stay in the present. 

Finally, he turned to face Thor, a wide grin plastered across his face, hoping that it conveyed the joyful surprise he was trying to portray, “Thor!” he greeted when the man was a couple of steps away, “What a surprise, it’s goo-”

Before he could finish his sentence, Thor had covered the distance and enveloped him in a tight hug. Loki gave a strangled cough and attempted to save his drink. Although, that visceral reaction to unexpected contact was not forthcoming. He knew there was no danger, having been on the receiving end of these embraces countless times before. There was a surprising comfort in it. But that was not something that Loki would be analysing right now. He buried the thought. Thor held the hug silently for several moments before Loki awkwardly patted him on the arm.

“Thor, I’d like to keep my ribs together. Please.”

At the touch, Thor released the hug and took a half-step backwards, keeping his hands on Loki’s shoulders. The man regarded Loki with an unhindered smile. Loki allowed the hands to stay for now. His focus was simply to remove himself from this situation, quickly. There was no positive outcome that he could see. 

“It’s so good to see you brother,” Thor said. 

“And you, Thor,” Loki replied, doing his best to mirror Thor’s emotions, “Though, I can’t say that I expected you to be in New York of all places.”

Thor let his hands drop to his sides, “Asgard is embarking on a joint venture with Stark Industries.” Loki swore internally. “And father sent me here to oversee it.”

A pit opened in Loki’s stomach. This was it. This was why Thanos had given him his time without quarrel. He had known. That bastard. As emotion and dread raged through his mind, Loki could just manage a flickering smile. Those thoughts threw themselves harder at Loki’s mental block, and he felt something crumble. He had to get out of here. Calm down. Re-evaluate. Adapt. Survive. 

Loki finished his drink in one mouthful and gave Thor a pat on the shoulder, “congratulations, Thor. You deserve it. But if you will excuse me, I have some business to attend to.” With that, Loki started back towards the door to Stark Tower, whether it was to the bar or solely to the exit he hadn’t decided yet. He just could not be around Thor. 

“Loki, wait!” Thor caught up with him easily, that eager smile still on his face, “It’s been so long. How have you been? Where have you been? What are you doing here?”

“This is neither the time nor the place for that conversation, Thor,” Loki responded, flatly at first then remembered his pretense and forced a thin smile, “Perhaps another night.” He attempted to step around Thor once more. 

“Please Loki,” something in Thor’s voice made Loki pause. It had lost that eager, puppy-like tone. A hint of anguish clung to his words. “It’s been so hard since you left.”

Another piece of Loki’s defenses fell away, and he turned his head to look at Thor, “...Left? You think I left?”

A frown creased Thor’s forehead, “I don’t understand.”

Loki exhaled forcefully through his nose, consciously forcing himself to be calm, “What does it matter? It’s in the past and should be left there.”

“Please wait, it’s been so hard, not knowing where you were, whether you were OK.”

Loki's defenses cracked. He could feel his cold, hard rage spilling through. Adrenaline had begun to seep into his system, tensing his muscles and tightening his stomach. Thor could barely finish his sentence before Loki rounded on him, jabbing one finger against his chest. 

“No!” He hissed through gritted teeth, eyes wide, “No. You do not get to tell me how hard it’s been for you. You have no idea. None whatsoever of what I’ve endured. What I’ve had to do to survive.”

Thor held his hands up in a peace gesture, genuine concern on his features. Damn him. “Loki...I’m sorry, brother. I meant no harm.”

Loki took a deliberately long and slow breath and retreated half a step, casting his eyes to the floor. He felt sick. His stomach was cramping, and his eyes were burning. His skin prickled with the sensation of eyes on him. Not only Thor’s but the curious onlookers around him, watching the drama unfold as though it was for their entertainment. Damn them all. 

Mistakenly taking the moment of calm as a cue, Thor continued, softer this time, “What happened to you? We searched the earth for you.”

“Who is we?” Loki didn’t look at him.

“Father and I,” Thor replied as though it were obvious. 

A dark, sarcastic laugh escaped Loki’s mouth before he could stop it. His control was slipping as that rage threatened to collapse his dam, “I knew he had lied to you, Thor, but I didn’t think you so naive as to believe him.”

“What are you talking about?”

Loki clenched his jaw and shook his head, “What does it matter?” He turned to leave once again. 

Before he could go, Thor reached out and gripped his arm, “Loki, please don’t walk away again.”

He wasn’t sure whether it was the unexpected physical contact or the implication that it had been his own decision to leave all those years ago, but Loki’s defenses shattered. He whirled about to face Thor, breaking the grip on his arm in the process and came face to face with the big man one of the few that matched his height. He could feel the fury on his own features as it roiled his stomach and clenched his fists. 

“Is that what he told you?” Loki asked in barely a whisper, but venom dripped from his words, “I didn’t walk away. Your father threw me out. I gave that man everything I had. Everything I was. And he robbed me of it. The moment I became inconvenient, he stripped me of my position, my money, my dignity and cast me to the wolves.” For a second, it looked as though Thor was going to interject, but Loki didn’t let him. The floodgates were open now. “The wolves caught me, Thor. And oh! How they bit and mauled and destroyed me. I begged and stole and worse to survive. And you believed that I had walked away? I disappeared from Asgard without a word, and you thought so little of me that you just trusted that I had simply left?” This time Loki paused deliberately, searching Thor’s face. He didn’t know what he was looking for. There was nothing he would find there that would help him now. 

“He’s my father, Loki...” The reply was small, pathetic for such a large man. 

“I needed help!” Loki yelled suddenly. It sent a shockwave through the sparse crowd around them who were stunned into silence. But Loki paid them no heed, “I needed your help, Thor. And you did nothing. You left me.” Loki felt raw as he spat the last words at Thor. His thoughts were racing, descending into a place he had managed to shut out for so long. He tried to swallow back the lump in his throat, but it was stuck fast. 

Thor looked dumbstruck. There was a terrible sadness on his face that Loki couldn’t, nor wanted to, process right now. Seeing it struck a fresh blow. The thought of what the last 6 years could have been. What they should have been before it was snatched from him. His eyes burned as he felt tears welling up. He turned his face away before they could fall. For a second, he contemplated saying something more. But he realised he had nothing. For a long time, he had practiced what he was going to say when, if, he ever saw Thor again. But over the years the possibility of seeing him again had waned to next to nothing, those words had burned and wilted into an incomprehensible stream of thought. And now that stream had dried up and there was nothing left. He swallowed again and started towards the doors to the building.

“Stop, don’t go now. We can work this out. I want to help you brother.”

“It’s too late for that now,” Loki paused and spoke over his shoulder with a quiet finality, “I’m not your brother anymore.”

The rhythmic thud of the music reverberated through Loki’s head as he stepped back inside. The darkened lighting and the deafening music deadened his thoughts to a thankfully minimal volume. He walked straight to the bar and muttered an order for whatever was strongest and then leant heavily on it, trying to process what had happened. And what the hell to do about it. After a second, the shot was placed on the bar under his eyes, and he drank it.

It was vodka he assumed by the taste. He gestured for another. He shot a quick glance out of the window to make sure Thor had not followed. The man was stood chatting with someone Loki didn’t know, a solemn but politely interested look on his face. 

“Do you always make such a stir when you go to parties, Cinderella?” 

It took all of Loki’s self-control not to just hang his head there and then. He instead focused on the new shot presented to him by the bar staff, finishing it off before replying, “Would you be surprised if I said no?”

Tony regarded him over the lip of his own glass, it was hard to tell what it was in the dark. He was dressed well, hair neatly done as ever, leaning on the bar looking out over the sea of people on the dancefloor, “The big guy told me that you two knew each other, but he didn’t warn me about whatever that was. I heard the word brother.”

Loki wasn’t even surprised that Tony had seen. It was just his usual luck, “It’s complicated,” he replied, indicating for another drink. 

“Hey, slow down. I never planned for family reunions in the drinks package,” Tony scolded, but when Loki met his eyes, there was nothing but amusement there. There was evidently confusion on his own face because Tony smirked, “I’m no stranger to complicated, Slick. Don’t stress yourself. If I’d known I’d have invited my therapist. She’s fantastic. Could sort you two out in less than an hour.”

A suspicious comfort began settling on Loki’s emotions. He narrowed his eyes at the feeling. Was Tony really this accepting? He swallowed the question with the next shot. The liquor burned his throat. 

“You’re late by the way,” Tony quipped, raising an eyebrow at him. 

Loki gave a breathy chuckle unexpectedly, “And yet had I been on time, you would have been disappointed.”

Tony was silent for a second, “That’s a neat trick, you know. That whole telepathy thing.”

“What if it’s no trick,” Loki replied casually, meeting Tony’s gaze, “What if you’re simply not as hard to read as you like to imagine?”

“Really?” Tony practically pouted, “Well maybe you’re not so hard to read either, bub.”

A fear blossomed on Loki’s mind, but it was dulled by the alcohol and the fact it was just another log to throw on the fire that had been this evening. After a beat, Loki cocked his head, “Oh? Then please pray tell. I’m dying to hear it.”

Tony raised an eyebrow, lowered drink to the bar and looked Loki up and down deliberately slowly, “You’re well off. That much is obvious by the cars and the apartment and the company you keep. But what you do is not publicly available, nor is it available to less than public search engines. And neither is your history. You’re not ex-military or special forces, no offence but that much is obvious. You keep odd hours and don’t even talk about who you work for. And you’re an exceptionally intelligent man who can read people like their children’s stories. So, I reckon you’re in accounts or business development or client management or something along those lines for someone who’s business is not particularly palatable. Am I in the ballpark?” Tony paused for a response. 

Loki opened his mouth to lie, but he hesitated, then smiled, “In a sense,” he stated. 

Tony nodded, victoriously, “Despite that, of the 3 times, I’ve met you, 100% of them have been while the both of us are leaning on a bar at various stages of the drunken road. With you, a few steps ahead of me on most of those. Whatever it is you’re doing in your life. You’re not happy with it. But there’s nothing you can do.”

Loki’s smile died, and he looked back to the bar top. Damn this whole damn building. 

“But!” Tony announced, picking his drink back up and gesturing for one for Loki, “That is what parties were invented for. To help us forget those terrible things that haunt us in the daylight.”

The drink was passed to Loki by the bartender and Tony raised his own, and chinked it against the rim of the glass before taking a swig. Loki looked from the glass to Tony’s face, searching it for something suspicious. Something was off. It had to be. This was not what he had expected to happen. The personality that Loki had planned on using to seduce Tony had been a man who was confident and aloof, charming but unobtainable. Not the broken and angry man that Loki really was. But Tony had seen through that act.

He gazed into the dark liquid in his glass then back to Tony. The man was handsome, incredibly so. Younger, fitter and more charismatic than any of Loki’s previous targets. But beyond that, the man had a heart and a soul. He was not the corrupt, greedy businessman who would do anything for that 1% bump in profits or one night drunken sex to boost their ego. Tony had known him for less than a week and had somehow broken through almost every barrier he had. But the strangest thing was, that Tony hadn’t walked away yet. 

He had finished the shot just as Tony struck up a new line of conversation. 

“How do you do that by the way?” he asked suddenly, as though the thought had just struck him. 

“Do what?” Loki replied through a grimace. 

“You are an internet ghost. I mean almost literally. There’s barely even paparazzi photos of you. I was hoping for something a little bit juicier.”

Loki tilted his head as he admired Tony, finally coming to a decision that was most likely to be blamed on alcohol. He would have tonight. This would be his night. Just for these few short hours, he could allow himself to enjoy this. With that thought, a physical weight seemed to lift from him. He knew it would be back come the morning twice as heavy as he had to put back the pieces of everything had been broken tonight. But for now, he was free of it.  

Loki replaced the glass on the bar and turned to face Tony properly for the first time, “Maybe you were just looking in the wrong places,” he teased, “I prefer not to have my details obtainable to just anyone. Those with the means and the determination to uncover it are invariably worth my time.”

Tony’s eyebrows arched in exaggerated surprise, “Was that flattery, Mr Laufeyson? What could you possibly hope to gain with that?”

“Nothing I haven’t already, Tony,” Loki replied smoothly, leaning slightly rest his arm on the bartop beside him. 

Tony observed the movement, “Is that so?”

Loki chuckled and caught his lip between his teeth as he moved slightly closer. His hand slid along the bartop, gliding up over Tony’s, stopping only once the tips of his fingers lay just under the cuff his shirt, brushing against the silver watch hidden there. There was nothing more than a handbreadth of space separating them. 

Tony held his position, intently watching the hand move before flicking his gaze up to Loki’s. Not that he was looking back, his eyes were focused keenly on Tony’s lips, letting them linger there for a long drawn out moment before they slowly lifted, showing him a world of offers unspoken.

A silence hung between them for a second, neither moving nor speaking until Tony lifted his free hand, a single finger outstretched, “Please, for the love of God, hold that thought,” he almost begged, backing up a couple of steps and striding away, lifting his watch to his mouth as he went.

Loki smirked to himself as he watched Tony walk, wondering why exactly he was muttering into his watch. His answer came when bright lights throughout the penthouse had him wincing and shielding his eyes, and the music stopped abruptly causing a cacophony of groans. The elevator doors on the far side of the room slid open, and the men and women took their cue to begin to filter into it. Only a few actually managed to fit, the others were being shepherded by Steve Rogers through a door that Loki hadn’t noticed before, presumably a stairwell to a lower floor.

Loki waited until he could see that the penthouse was empty before setting his empty glass down on the now unmanned bar and crossing to where Tony with his back to Loki, decanting brandy into two waiting tumblers.

“You’re quite the trusting man, Tony,” Loki said, moving across the room in slow, measured steps.

“Hm, that actually not true,” Tony replied, replacing the lid of his decanter and turning to face his guest.

“Oh, I beg to differ,” Loki beamed lifted his hands and gesturing around the empty penthouse, “You and I met 3 days ago. You know nothing of me save for my name. And now you and I are alone,” his expression of curiosity became intense as he got closer, now just a few feet away, “You’re vulnerable.”

“Pfft, please,” Tony answered, “You would not believe the security team I have. Not to mention, the thousands of cameras and the world’s most intelligent AI tha-”

Loki didn’t wait to hear the rest of the sentence. Had he been in any other state of mind, the sentence would have been invaluable to him but now it was nothing but noise. He cut off Tony’s words by sweeping over the final couple of feet and claiming his lips for a much more enjoyable purpose. Hands flowed up to clasp the man’s stubbled cheeks, holding Tony against him as Loki pushed forward, forcing him back against the stone wall. It took Tony a second to recover before he was kissing back fiercely, tongue nimbly parting Loki’s lips and slipping inside, readily greeted. Fingers fumbled for the buttons of Loki’s silver jacket, undoing them with practiced ease and gliding around his waist, feeling cool skin beneath the thin shirt. Loki arched against the man as hands roved across his back, running his own fingers up the CEO’s neck, lacing them through his dark hair. Grasping it tightly, Loki pulled Tony’s lips sharply from his, giving a teasing, breathless grin, as he looked down on the man, drinking in the quickened breath, the glisten on his lips, the yearning in his eyes. This was control.

“Now,” he murmured, his head drifting forward to brush his lips against Tony’s ear, cheek against cheek, keeping a firm grip on his hair, “I was assured of an after party. Mr Stark.”

“Well…I won’t have it said I don’t keep my promises,” Tony muttered between heavy breaths, closing his eyes and leaning his head back into Loki’s possessive hand as his neck was nipped and brushed by hot, moist lips, “I know the perfect place.”

Tony could feel Loki’s grin pressing against his own cheek, “Show me.”

And Tony Stark obeyed.


	6. Chapter 6

“You knew.” 

Loki snapped that statement at the shriveled man as soon as he stepped out of that lift. He had left Stark Tower less than an hour previously with an almost genuine apology that he could not stay longer. All things considered it had been a fine evening followed by an exceptional night. But Loki had only given himself one night to enjoy. Now he had to face the reality that he had put temporarily on hold. And that had unfortunately started with an immediate visit to this room. He hadn’t even passed his own apartment for a change of clothes. Every now and then he caught a whiff of Tony's cologne on him. It was a little distracting. 

The man gave his choked gravelly chuckle, but didn’t bother to lift his eyes from the cabinet drawer his was fingering through, “Well, good afternoon, Laufeyson. Would you care to elaborate on what it is that has you so stressed? We know a great many things.” 

“Thor,” Loki stated. Despite the night with Tony having dulled his anger a little, the memory of the argument with his brother was still vivid. Something so monumental that would derail his whole operation, his whole life was not something that could simply be ‘overlooked’.  

“Ah yes, your long-lost brother,” the man relished the pinched look on Loki’s face, “Yes, of course we knew. Why do you think we have been so generous with your timescale? Quite frankly, it’s disappointing that it has taken you so long to discover it yourself.” 

Loki didn’t reply. He didn’t know why he had come here. When he had awoken that morning he had been determined to come here and confront the man about this. To get an explanation. But the closer he had gotten to the office the weaker his resolve had become until he found himself struggling to remember what he was doing here anymore. It wouldn’t achieve anything but to vent his own frustration. And that was a dangerous game.  

“Is this going to be a problem, Laufeyson?” 

“It might already have been,” Loki retorted before he had actually could stop himself. Maybe he was fueled by that sliver of determination he felt from the night previous or something else but he couldn’t stop himself, “I was sent into rather ambitious scheme with no time for planning, minimal information on the situation, not even a hint of what I am looking for and now I have been blindsided by the one person who knows enough about me to cause everything to  fall apart. So quite frankly, I have been set up to fail by your incompe-” 

He didn’t have time to finish his sentence.  

The man crossed the room faster than Loki could possibly have imagined and backhanded him across the face. Sharp pain echoed across his jaw bone and into his skull.  A combination of the surprise and the sheer force of the blow knocked Loki back a step where he stumbled over his own feet and dropped to the floor unceremoniously. His cheek burned. He slowly brought a hand to his face and it came away bloody. He stared up the man incredulously. But silent.  

The man stood over him, idly readjusting the set of large rings he had across his hand, “I’ve told you before, boy. Do not forget where you came from,” the man’s voice had not changed in volume, but it stung almost as much as the strike, “We pulled you out of the gutter when no one else cared for you. You owe us your  _life_. You would be wise to make sure your life remains worth something to us. We can throw you back at a moment’s notice. What would you do without us to hide you from your own crimes? How long do you think you would last before someone less understanding than Thanos found you?” 

Loki remained frozen in place, eyes fixed on the man. He did his best to control his breathing but his heart was thudding in his ears.  

The man chuckled again, “Get up.” 

Loki obeyed without a word. His face stung and he could feel an open cut about half an inch long along his cheekbone. A drop of blood was welling in one corner.  

“Now, I will ask you again,” the man calmly returned to his desk and took a seat, “Will this be a problem?” 

Loki took a moment to control himself then replied, “No.” 

“No what?” 

“...No sir.” 

“Good,” the man drawled, “For your impertinence, your time is halved. We will have delivery in 3 months.” 

Fear echoed through Loki’s mind, but he suppressed it and nodded.  

The man smiled his chilling smile, clearly very much enjoying this whole experience, “Well since you are here, you might as well give an update on whatever progress you are making,” he paused to look him up and down, “And I can only hope for your sake that it is not simply parties and...less than lonely nights.” 

Loki swallowed. He could feel the drop of blood finally reach the point of falling down his cheek but he didn’t move to wipe it away, “I have infiltrated Stark Tower, I know the layout of the penthouse, Tony's personal apartment and I have met his personal assistant Steve Rogers,” he was reciting his information as flatly and succinctly as possible, “I am certain that I have established sufficient relationship with Tony himself to continue the project. However, what his work is has yet to reach conversation. Though I imagine it will. I can’t promise when that would be.” 

“And your brother?” the man asked. It was a leading question and an obvious one at that.  

“It won’t be a problem, it is unlikely that whatever this joint venture is the ultimate goal, I get the impression that Tony keeps his best ideas under his own control.” 

“I didn’t realise you and your target would be on a first name basis so soon Laufeyson.” 

Loki hesitated. It hadn’t even occurred to him that he had made the switch in his mind. He swallowed again and but didn’t bother to respond. The man was trying to get a rise out of him again, but Loki had learned his lesson.  

Eventually the man realised his fun was over, “Very well. Remember, you have 11 weeks remaining to deliver us what we want. We will not tolerate failure. Now be gone.” 

Loki left without a word.  

********** 

Music blared from the speakers set up strategically around Tony’s workshop. He had headed down there pretty much as soon as Loki had slipped out earlier that day, with a muttered apology and citing that job he despised as his reason for turning down Tony’s offer of breakfast in bed. How anyone could turn down such an offer was beyond him.  

It had been a particularly enjoyable night. Loki was possibly one of the most attractive men that Tony had had the pleasure of and the guy knew what he was doing. With his tongue. With his hands. With his... 

“Sir!” 

Tony physically flinched as Jarvis’s voice echoed through the room muting his music in the process. 

“Your heartrate is elevated, is everything alright? Would you like me to inform Ms Potts or Mr Rogers?” 

Tony sighed. It had been a recommendation of his therapist to have Jarvis monitor his biometrics. She had said he would be able to point out panic attacks or anxiety before he could, helping him to better deal with it. What she hadn’t anticipated was Tony’s overestimation of Jarvis’s sensitivity.  

“False alarm,” Tony sat back and regarded the circuit board which now had a scorch mark straight through the middle of it, “But could you remind me, what's rule number one of the workshop?” 

“No interruptions while the soldering iron is on, unless there is an emergency.” 

“Bingo.” 

“In my defence sir, I perceived an emergency. But now that I have your attention-” 

Tony frowned, “Wait, did you only do that so I would answer you?” 

“Dr Blake has asked to see you when you have a break,” Jarvis continued without addressing Tony’s question.  

“I’m pretty sure I programmed you better than that young man,” Tony muttered glowering around the room at the general existence of his AI.  

“Apologies sir. What should I tell Dr Blake?” 

“I’ll meet him in the penthouse in five minutes,” Tony replied with a note of resignation. He would have to start this board all over again anyway.  

“Very good, sir.”  

With that, Tony pulled his gloves from his hands and stood from his chair, letting it wheel where it would within the room, and headed for the door. There were never any guests down here, not even before Afghanistan, this was his sanctuary, his alone place. There was only him and Jarvis allowed to enter here. The door to his workshop opened with a futuristic and entirely unnecessary swoosh and he jogged up the stairs beyond it, confident that Jarvis would take care of the security as he left.  

The penthouse was spotless, you would be hard pressed to find any evidence of a party not more than 24 hours earlier. Thor wasn’t anywhere to be seen so Tony crossed to the espresso machine tucked in a alcove. It had been where he'd kept his brandy set, but Steve and Pepper had made him move that. Only allowed out on special occasions. This espresso machine was his negotiated substitute. It whirred into life when he placed his cup under it.  

His lift dinged softly behind him and he heard the doors open.  

“Good afternoon Tony!” 

“You know it’s going to be so quiet around here if you ever leave,” Tony commented as he plucked his cup from the machine and turned.  

Thor stood beaming just out of the lift, hands in his jeans pockets, plaid shirt hanging over a white t-shirt. 

“Oh I didn’t know it was lumberjack day,” Tony quipped, “Or is that everyday for you?” 

“Only the weekends,” Thor replied and it took Tony a moment to recognise that he was joking, “Thank you for sparing me your time at the weekend, no doubt you have better things to be doing than humouring me.” 

“You’d actually be surprised,” Tony replied, as he realised that he did pretty much exactly the same on the weekends as he did during the week, “You want a drink? I did have some stuff left over from last night but mom and dad have hidden it from me.” 

“I’m sure Steve and Pepper are doing what is in your best interest. But I’m fine for a drink, thank you, Tony, I shan’t keep you that long.” 

Tony took a sip of his coffee and looked the man up and down quickly, “Well what can I do you for big guy?” he crossed to the set of sofas positioned in the lowered part of his floor and gestured for Thor to join him.  

“I actually came to apologise,” Thor followed Tony and took a seat opposite him, “and to ask for a favour.” 

“Did you break another microscope and need me to buy you a new one?” 

Thor winced, “Peter told you...” 

“He tells me most things.” 

Thor leant forward in his seat, resting his arms on his thighs, “I actually wanted to apologise for what happened last night. I wasn’t expecting Loki’s reaction to seeing me to be so...violent. In hindsight it was not the time nor place for such a reunion. Particularly when so much is unknown.” 

Tony’s eyebrows flicked up and down as he rested his empty cup on the arm of the sofa, “Yeah, no kidding. Didn’t exactly seem like a Brady Bunch kind of moment. For a second I thought I was going to have to call Nat or Clint. But then again I reckon you could have taken him.” A sigh heaved Thor’s shoulders. Tony scratched his eyebrow, “If it means that much to you then apology accepted but I’ve got to be honest, I don’t see what you’re apologising to me for. Now I don’t want to pry but it’s  probably not me you should be apologising to.” Tony tried to be as nonchalant as possible, it wasn’t exactly his place to be dictating how the two apparent brothers interacted. 

“I know,” Thor nodded, “That’s actually related to the favour I wanted to ask of you.” 

Tony schooled his expression into neutrality. He could see where this was going. 

Thor rubbed his hands together as he gathered his thoughts, “Tony you are the only person I know who has seen Loki, let alone spoken to him, in six years,” Thor had a pleading look in his eyes, “I don’t know where he’s been nor what he’s been doing, but something terrible has happened to him. That much I know. It’s changed something in him.” 

Tony regarded Thor with a silent, intent expression. He had suspected  something was up from the first night he had met Loki that drunken evening in a bar. Tony had never quite forgotten Loki’s rambling about his ‘situation’. Whatever Thor thought had happened to Loki, Tony did not think that it was in the past.  

Thor waited for Tony to reply but when he didn’t be continued, “No matter what he has been through or what he has done, he is still my brother and I have to help him.” 

“And how do I slot into your ambitions?”  

“Do you plan on seeing him again?” 

“...Maybe,” Tony answered evasively, despite the fact he had already made that decision as he had watched Loki get dressed that morning.  

Thor nodded, encouraged by Tony’s answer, “It was clear last night that he has no intention in talking to me, at least not anytime soon,” there was an immense sadness on Thor’s face, “But it’s obvious he sees something in you that he connects with. Not that I’m surprised, but...would you help me find out what’s happened to him? If I can do that then maybe I  help him.” 

A silence fell between them as Tony thought. In all honesty, what Thor was suggesting was something that he had already considered doing. But was he about to jump into this crockpot of family drama and daddy issues. He had enough of those of his own. 

Thor was staring at him with an incredibly accurate impression of a Labrador puppy in need. After a second, Tony  ran a hand over his face and sat forward in his seat. 

“Ok,  _if_  I was going to help you,  _if_ ,” he reiterated the last word as hope began to spread across Thor’s face, “You’ve got to give me something. Some background. I’ve only known the guy a week. I’m not a mind-reader. And by the sounds of it, he’s going to clam up the moment I even ask about all this. So, tell me what happened between you . What do you think happened to him?” 

Thor hesitated and looked to the floor.  

Tony sighed, “Look, I’m not asking as a boss or a colleague or an informant. Nothing you tell me will reach your dad if that’s what you’re worried about. You’ve been here, what nearly two months?” Thor looked up and met his gaze, “I’m asking as a friend.” 

Thor offered a small smile as his response and nodded his head as he apparently came to a decision, “At Asgard, Loki reported directly to my father, one of only a few of us who did. I don’t know exactly what it was that he did, it was all confidential. He developed business leads with new clients I believe. Whatever it was, it meant that Loki would travel away for periods of time, sometimes a couple of days, sometimes longer, but he always came back successful if a little stressed. Then one day about six years ago, he came to me and told me that he was going away for his most difficult project yet and that he wouldn’t be back for a while. Months possibly,” he paused but Tony didn’t push him. After a moment, he continued, “He was scared. But I thought nothing of it. Assumed it was the nervousness that naturally came with a large in. God I should've.. but I didn’t and so off he went, here, to New York, I found out later, and...” 

“Never came back,” Tony finished for him as Thor trailed off. 

Thor sniffed and nodded, “Of course I tried to search, begged father to tell me where he’d been sent what he was doing. But he always just told me that it was being handled and that he was doing everything he could...” Thor wiped at his nose with the back of a big hand, “The years passed and I think father presumed I had forgotten, but when Stark Industries approached with the offer of working together, of course I jumped at the chance.” 

“You came here looking for him.” 

Thor nodded, “And now I have found him.” 

Tony sat back into his sofa, frowning at the floor in thoughtful silence. 

“You know...he’s not the man you saw last night.” 

“Well I hope that both saw slightly different sides to him last night,” Tony chuckled at his own joke but Thor didn’t join in. Tony could see what Thor really meant though. Even after just a few, relatively brief meetings, it was clear that Loki was hiding much more than he was revealing. He took a deep breath, “Ok, fine, for you, I’ll do my best,” he held up his hands quickly as Thor beamed like a Viking on the eve of battle and moved to get up in such a way that had Tony immediately worried for his ribs, “I can’t guarantee anything! I don’t even know if the guy wants a third date.” 

Thor was grinning, “He will Tony. Trust me. I know what he looks for in a partner.” 

Tony pulled a face, “I don’t even want to think about the connotations of that sentence now I know you’re brothers.” 

Thor only chuckled, apparently in too good a mood for anything to really bother him now, “I wouldn’t worry too much about it,” he slapped his hands on his thighs and pushed himself up, “Well I have taken up enough of your time. Thank you once again Tony, I will repay you, I promise.” 

Tony stood up as well, “Don’t count your brothers before they hatch...” 

With that, Thor grinned and headed for the lift once more. Tony remained where he was until the lift doors had closed.  

“Jarvis what time is it?” 

“It is 5:39pm.” 

Tony wrinkled his nose in thought. There were so many logical reasons not to bother with this. He was still not fully recovered from Afghanistan. He had the Heart project to think about. Not only that but the joint venture with Asgard was incredibly important for Stark Industries in its still establishing reputation as ‘not-a-weapons-dealer'. He wasn’t even sure he had time for dating. And yet, he couldn’t shake the image of Loki’s face. Not just the man in his bed that morning, but the man in need of help the night they first met. The man with so much buried that merely the sight of a brother he hadn’t seen in years had him raging. The man who was not only suspicious, but confused that anyone would even bother to help pick him up off the floor without demanding something in return.  

He gave another short sigh.  

“My therapist had better be proud of me,” he muttered to himself as he pulled his phone from his back pocket and began typing out the message to Loki. 

 


	7. Chapter 7

Rain pattered softly against the wall of glass that line the side of the corridor, blurring the image of the city beyond. Not that there was too much of a view from here. Dr Bruce Banner had requested a lab as close to ground level as was possible. He had a thing about heights apparently. Tony had been more than happy to oblige if it meant being able to take on one of the world’s foremost theoretical physicists and radiation experts. After his employ he had quickly become one of the tight group of Tony’s inner circle. When Tony had returned from Afghanistan and announced the change from weapons to energy, Bruce had been a leading figure in the new R&D facility.  

Not that Tony had ever told him, but Bruce was one of the very few people that he considered to be an intellectual equal. They had different, yet complementary minds that seems to bounce off each other in the most productive ways.  

The doors to Bruce’s lab slid open as Tony approached and slid closed behind him11. He found Bruce stood at his desk just ahead of the door. The rest of the lab spanned off to the right, made up of an array of machines that beeped or whirred or silently flashed tiny LED lights. At the far end, a glass cabinet marked with a big radiation warning sticker sat closed over something that Tony presumed to be Bruce’s latest project. He was quite happy to let him get on with whatever he felt would be in the best interests of the company.  

“Missed you at the party,” Tony quipped, smiling as he crossed to Bruce’s desk.  

“Parties aren’t really my thing, Tony, you know that,” Bruce looked up as Tony approached and held out a hand to shake Tony’s in greeting, “I hear it was a good night though. What can I do for you?” 

“Did you get my email?” 

“The one with the readouts attached?” 

Tony nodded.  

“Yeah I got it this morning, I was just reading through it now. It’s interesting stuff.” 

“I’ll let you finish it before I ask my question. Well, questions.” 

Bruce returned to his monitor and gestured to a second that was set perpendicular to his own, “There’s actually a report I was going to send to you later today on the concept design for micro-nuclear reactors, but you can make a start while I’m finishing this if you want.” 

Tony shrugged and approached the computer that lit up as he stepped up to it, the facial recognition activated and he was immediately logged in. A report document was already open on the screen.  

“So, I hear you’re dating now.” 

Tony sighed looked up from the monitor. Bruce was peering at his own screen intently through glasses perched on the end of his nose, apparently oblivious to Tony’s reaction.  

“You know, you’re the third person to ask me that on my way here,” he commented, going back to his screen, “Would you be able to hook me up with this Stark’s Personal Life email blast that everyone else seems to be a part of? I need to keep up somehow.” 

The edge of a smirk lifted Bruce’s lips and he looked across the lab to him, “You’d have to ask Thor for that.” 

“I knew that big mouth would be trouble,” Tony muttered.  

“He seems quite excited by the whole prospect.” 

“Does he...” Tony stared deliberately at his screen. This was not why he had come down to Banner’s lab. Hi had actually come down here to take advantage of the mutual peer review system the two had set up not long after Bruce’s employ. They would come to each other with their work and reports and act as a judgement free sounding board for all the dumb ideas they came up with. Well mostly it was dumb ideas that Tony came up with, Bruce’s were usually entirely sensible.  

There was a short pause before Bruce continued, “So, are you dating?” 

Tony rolled his eyes and didn’t answer.  

“You know I think it’s a good thing!” Bruce offered brightly, “You’ve been saying you need to get out more, start meeting new people.” 

“Oh good lord, alright, Dr Phil, I’ve already got one therapist on my ass about that kind of thing. If I wanted advice on that I’d ask for it,” Tony sat back from his screen.  

“While we’re on the subject-” 

“We’re  _not_ on the subject...” 

“Have you made sure that you considered what it is that Loki actually wants?” 

Tony paused what he was doing and looked up a Bruce, a confused frown on his face before a realisation came over him, “Ah...I see. Who put you up to this? It was Steve wasn’t it. Boy he works fast nowadays.” 

Bruce half-shrugged, clearly not especially bothered that he was caught, “He presumed that you wouldn’t be willing to talk about it with him.” 

“He presumed right.” 

“But I do agree with his caution, Tony,” Bruce looked at Tony with real intention for the first time, removing his glasses in the process. 

“Oh Jesus...” Tony rubbed the bridge of his nose. 

“I’m just saying that you need to make sure that you’re keeping a healthy amount of skepticism. I mean you’re Tony Stark. What you know and what you do would be worth a lot of money to a lot of people who aren’t afraid to play dirty to get it,” Bruce paused for what Tony suspected was deliberate dramatic effect, “You just need to be careful.” 

“I appreciate your concern Bruce, or should I say I appreciate Steve’s concern, but I wasn’t born yesterday. I know what he could be sniffing around for. But what am I supposed to do? Turn my nose up at everyone who shows even the slightest interest in me?” Tony scoffed, “I wouldn’t be able to speak to anyone. It’s not realistic.” 

Bruce chuckled, “Of course not.” 

“Besides, me even seeing him again is just a favour to Thor to find out where he’s been for the last six years,” Tony mumbled as he went back to the information on his monitor, mentally congratulating himself that what he said had almost sounded truthful. 

“So, you are seeing him again,” Bruce pointed out.  

Tony’s eyes flicked up and then back to his computer, “Maybe.” 

“Good for you,” Bruce smiled, ”Have you got any theories by the way? About where he’s been, I mean.” 

“Not a clue...” Tony replied a little distracted as he reread a sentence that might have been of relative importance. When he realised it wasn’t, he looked up, “Most likely came to New York, realised his life with Asgard could never live up to this, and spent six years partying it up downtown where Papa Odin couldn’t find him. It’s not hard to disappear in a city like this. Would you mind if we get back to the readings I came down here about in the first place? I feel like we’re spending literally all day not doing that. And it is the one thing I had in my diary.” 

Bruce replaced his glasses and returned his attention to the screen, “Well if what you’ve given me is accurate then these readings are phenomenal. The amount of energy that this thing is outputting is like nothing I’ve seen before. It’s just a shame that it can’t seem to hold itself together.” 

Tony gave an affirming hm.  

“Can I ask what this is?” 

“I always encourage questions.” 

“Is this project Heart?” 

“No comment.” 

It appeared that his response gave Bruce all the answer he needed. Which was good, because Tony was desperate to share what he had achieved, but he knew that he couldn’t. Not officially. Not yet. But Bruce was a trustworthy guy.  

“Do you think that alloy we made not so long ago would be able to withstand the fluctuations better?” 

Bruce shook his head pensively, “I doubt it, these spikes are reactor level wild. It’d need its own cooling system.” 

Tony scowled at the floor thoughtfully immediately running through potential alternatives. There had to be something he missed. He hadn’t come so close only to lose it now.   

“Did you get my email the other day?” Bruce asked curiously. 

“Probably.” 

“Did you read it?” 

“Probably not.” 

 “Ok well, I came across something in your dad’s archived files now that they’ve been uploaded.” 

Tony’s mood picked up a little, “Oh yeah? What?” 

“Well it’s not exactly my field, you’d have look into it yourself, but it appears to be the steps needed to create a new element,” Bruce started typing away at his computer and Tony moved around to watch over his shoulder as a set of scanned pages of a handwritten notebook began to fill the screen, “Seems like your dad had everything except the technology to make it.” 

The corner of Tony’s mouth lifted as his eyes flicked over his dad’s handwriting scribbled on the sheets of scanned notebooks. He’d only actually asked for his dad’s notebooks to be uploaded to the system for nostalgia’s sake. He hadn’t cared too much about them until his brush with death had made him re-evaluate a lot about his life.  

“Been dead for almost 20 years, still taking me to school,” Tony smiled to himself, “Could you send this to me? Again. I’ll get Jarvis to run some tests. This could be exactly what I needed. This is why you're my favourite radiation specialist.” 

“Mmhm,” Bruce replied, already in the process of uploading it, “As far as I know I’m your only radiation specialist.” 

“Which only emphasises my point,” he grinned and turned for the door only to spin back around when he was halfway there, “Oh and please please please please delete those read outs. Super mega confidential. You know the drill.” 

Bruce wafted a hand in his direction, “Sure sure, I got it.” 

“And for the love of god, don’t let the kid get hold of it, ciao!” 

************ 

Loki sat in the chair before his planning wall, hands clasped under his chin. His cheek throbbed a little against the butterfly strips he’d used to hold it together. They weren’t really necessary. The cut was small and had already mostly healed over, but anything he could do to help it heal smoothly would be good. It was the darkened ring of bruising around it that was slightly more problematic. It would only bring about difficult questions.  

But that would be a problem for a later date. He had covered bruises before and he could do it again.  

For now he needed to get an idea of his next steps. 

He had spent the day and a half since his last encounter with Stark infilling some of the gaps in his knowledge. He’d written notes and pinned them around the headshot of the man for his own information. Things such as ‘Undergoing therapy. PTSD?’ and ‘Exceptionally perceptive’. He’d added another note to those of Stark’s staff he’d met highlighting the loyalty that was apparent in the demeanor of Steve Rodgers. It had only taken the one encounter to eliminate him as a potential source of information. He hadn’t encountered any of the others. Save for Thor of course.  

The only photo he had of the man had been a folded up polaroid he found buried in the pocket of his old sets of clothes. Some jeans he brought over from Asgard all those years ago. It was a photo Thor had demanded to take of the two of them years ago at a friend’s wedding where a number of the novelty polaroid cameras had been spread around the reception. They were smiling up at the camera, Thor’s arm around Loki’s shoulders, the other extended in the foreground of the photo holding the camera above them. In truth Loki had forgotten most of that night, but the few memories he did have were fond.  

He had paused only for a second to regard it before he folded himself out of the photo and pinned it up to join the others on his board. That was not his life anymore. That was a different man in the photo with Thor.  

The rain pattered against his window, creating a scene of scheming and conniving that Loki couldn’t help but consider a little dramatic, even for him. With a sigh, he stood and left the room. Staring at a wall for hours wasn’t going to change what was on it.  

It was clear that any plan he had would likely be thrown out of the window almost immediately. That had been clear two nights ago. Although, despite the minor set-back, he was fairly confident he had been successful in gaining a foothold in Tony’s life. Now he needed to ensure that it was secure. Perhaps Thor could be that way in.  

He considered the option as he started his coffee machine and pulled his phone from his pocket. It would be tricky. Exceptionally so. The difficulty would not come from Thor. It was clear that Thor wanted nothing more than to have Loki return and for everything to be forgotten and they could go back to the life they had shared in that photo. Brothers once again.  

But Loki knew that that could never happen and that maintaining the pretense would painful. Even more painful when at its very end, Loki would disappear once again and this time Thor would know why. Loki gave a resigned sigh and touched the cut on his cheek. 

The coffee machine finished with a resolute click and Loki took a sip of the scalding liquid as he turned to lean on the counter. There was a notification of a single text having been received on his phone. Loki knew what it was. Tony had reached out about a day ago and Loki had ignored it. Not only for strategic purposes but at the time he was not exactly in the best place to answer it. It had arrived while he was peering into his bathroom mirror attempting to dab the remains of the blood from his face. 

He opened it. 

‘Since you turned down my offer of breakfast, I can only assume you don’t eat it. So how about dinner instead? (Without your brother around this time)’ 

Loki thought for a moment before replying, ‘Let’s just say there was something else I’d hoped to have eaten that morning, but there was sadly no time. But I’m sure we can work something out later this week, as long as I have your word on Thor. It might make for an awkward date.’  

He had barely enough time to replace the phone on the counter before it started ringing. Loki watched it  impassively and waited until it had almost rung off before answering.  

“Good afternoon Tony.” 

“Do you reply to a message and then just  fling your phone across the room? How can it take so long to answer when you literally had your hands on it seconds ago?” 

“I just like to keep you waiting,” Loki replied easily, “Although, in all honesty, I didn’t expect a call. Are you not busy?” 

“I hate texting. Too much hands-on requirements. I can multitask this way.” 

“Mmhm,” now that he mentioned it, Tony’s voice had a distinct echo, “Am I on speaker phone?” 

“Yup, but don’t worry there’s no one else here. You can be as dirty as you want.” 

“Where exactly are you? You’re echoing.” 

“Er...workshop.” 

Loki hesitated and very quickly weighed up his options. This was an opportunity to get maybe even a hint of information about what it was he was supposed to be looking for at Stark Industries. But he bit it back. It was too early to be fishing for that yet, “Hm, not important enough to dedicate hands and tongue to at the same time. Oh Tony,” Loki chastised playfully.  

“Not during the working day, I'm afraid. How about Friday?” 

“I think I should be free in the evening.” 

“Great. Dinner at mine.” 

“Oh, will you be cooking?” 

Tony laughed down the phone, “God no. You like Thai? I know a fantastic place just down the street.” 

“Sounds fine to me.” 

“It’s a date then!” Tony said brightly.  

Loki chuckled, “A date.” 

“And just to be clear, Thor will not be present this time.” 

“That is good news,” Loki replied, then continued without really considering what he was going to say, “How is he?” 

“Funny, he asked that about you.” 

“That doesn’t surprise me.” 

“Mind if I ask what the hell happened there?” 

Loki paused, “It’s a long story.” 

“Well we’ll have a whole evening on Friday,” he sounded as though he was going to continue when there was a noise like sparking wiring in the background and Tony swore under his breath, “Ah, I should go. Apparently multi-tasking isn’t as easy as they make it sound. Cya Friday.” 

“See you Friday.” 

With that the phone went dead.  

He had four days before he would be meeting Tony again. Four days to work out how to deal with the Thor problem. The most obvious challenge was how much Thor knew. Loki had never actually been clear about how much Odin had told his son about what Loki did at Asgard. The fact that before being ousted, his role at Asgard had been largely the same as it was for Thanos. Loki suspected that Thor had been kept in the dark. His morals were too steadfast for him to have the opinion of Loki that he did if he had known that Loki was nothing more than a snake for pay.  

But he couldn’t work on hunches alone. Not for this project. He had to speak to Thor and he would somehow have to do it without Tony being involved. Loki screwed his eyes shut and rubbed the bridge of his nose. 

With a sigh he dialed the only other number in his phone.  

“What?” the voice drawled down the phone.  

“I need a cellphone number for him,” Loki replied simply, they would know who he meant.  

“Reuniting with your long-lost brother are we?” the man chuckled, “I hope that it does not stir any sentiment. I’d hate to have to report your betrayal to Thanos.” 

“If you’re worried about that then you clearly don’t know me. Just get me the number.” 

The man chuckled and Loki could he the faint noise to typing in the background. He waited silently. He had no interest in wasting words on this. After about a minute, the man reeled off a cellphone number. Loki memorized it and hung up without a goodbye, immediately typing the number instead.  

He hesitated with his thumb over the call button. There would be no going back from this. Once he made contact with Thor he knew the man would not leave him be until this whole project was over and Thanos would step in with whatever cover up methods he had. At that point Loki would be more of a ghost to Thor than ever before.  

But he could not see another option.  

With gritted teeth, Loki pressed call.  


	8. Chapter 8

The day of the date came around slower than Tony would have liked.  He didn’t have anything particularly special in mind, other than take out in his penthouse. Alone this time, rather than in a throng of mostly strangers. Given that his public appearances had been somewhat limited recently for a number of reasons he didn’t want to imagine the furor that going out to a restaurant with a new man might stir up in the gossip columns.

Loki had arrived appropriately late, dressed as smartly as always, carrying a bottle of a remarkably expensive red wine as what he called an apology for skipping out so early the last they saw each other. The conversation flowed easily over the take out food and the wine, touching on this topic and that and the evening passed quickly. Loki was an exceptional conversationalist with well-constructed opinions backed up with reasonable evidence that could counter many of Tony’s points. But he was just as gracious when he could not give an argument against something Tony had said. The only problem was that for all of Tony subtle attempts at gleaning information, Loki had revealed nothing about himself all night. 

Eventually, they found themselves sat on the sofas of Tony’s lounge as Tony emptied the remains of the wine into Loki’s upheld glass, setting it on the coffee table and taking a seat beside him. 

“Now that we are sufficiently tipsy,” Tony started, watching Loki take a sip from his glass, “I want to play a game.”

Loki raised an eyebrow at him, “A game? Interesting. What are the rules?”

“You ever play truth or dare when you were a kid?” Loki nodded. “Well it’s like that, but without the dare bit.”

“A shame. That always was my favorite part,” Loki smirked that beguiling smirk over his glass. 

“Sadly, dare is a two-wine-bottle game, this one is easier. So far you have been largely an enigma to me and while I love mysteries, I love getting to the bottom of them even more. So!” he held up the index finger of the hand that wasn’t holding a glass, “There’s only one rule. Nice and easy. I tell you something that I think I know about you and you tell me true or false.”

Loki tilted his head, an unreadable expression on his face, “And do I get to return the favor?”

“Mmhm.”

“No holds barred.”

“What's the fun in barring holds?”

Loki paused for a moment, not breaking eye contact as he considered the proposition. Tony silently complimented the man’s poker face. “Sounds fun.”

“So you agree to the terms?”

Loki smiled and nodded, “I have one to start.”

“Shoot.”

“You devised this game five minutes ago.”

“Well that was obvious,” Tony replied unfazed, “What can I say I have a creative streak. My turn. You don’t own a single piece of clothing that isn’t black, white, green, or grey.”

“False.”

Tony’s eyebrows rose immediately, “Oh, unexpected. What is it? Wooly scarf? Tie-dye trousers? Neon underwear?”

Loki chuckled, “I’m afraid Tony, I have fulfilled my obligation to answer as per the rules of your game. Anything further must be left up to your imagination.”

Tony conceded the point with a sip of wine and did indeed leave it to his imagination. 

“My next assumption about you Tony Stark is that you are now imagining me in neon underwear.”

“You are just swinging at low hanging fruit. Time to turn the heat up a little,” Tony considered Loki silently for a moment, “You haven’t been on a date in a while.”

An unexpected expression flickered across Loki’s face but he masked it with a mouthful of wine too quickly for Tony to work out what it was. Tony had struck something a little deeper. Maybe it was the chink in Loki’s armor he had been looking for. After a second, Loki responded, “Is it that obvious?”

Tony shrugged one shoulder, “An educated guess. You don’t seem like the kind of guy to let his guard down easy. Makes dating pretty difficult. I’ve been there.”

Loki lifted his arm to lean his elbow on the back of the sofa, resting his head in his hand, “...True or false, you don’t fully trust me.”

“...True.”

Loki smirked as though he had scored a point, “It would seem that we both face an uphill climb. I wonder who will endure the longest.”

Tony took a drink to mask his thought process. The comment struck him a little more than he had expected, “I wonder...” he waved a hand in the air, “Ok we’re both naturally paranoid people, moving on. Assumption number three, you didn’t come to this city of your own accord.”

Loki’s expression faltered, this time enough that Tony could see what it was he was trying to hide. It was something caught between fear and suspicion. He paused for a moment before replying, “...True.”

“Well, I certainly hoped you’ve liked it while you’ve been here,” Tony made an attempt at light-hearted but it was clear that the sentiment didn’t quite land. He had pinpointed something else that Loki was not so casual about. Thor had been telling the truth after all. It wasn’t that Tony didn’t believe him, it was just that the whole story seemed so fantastical that he wasn’t sure that it wasn’t at least partially misremembered. 

Loki looked to the floor for just a second before he appeared to compose himself through some conscious thought-process and returned his gaze to Tony with a renewed interest in his eyes, “You spend 90% of your time alone.”

“Do robots count?”

“No.”

Tony wrinkled his nose, “Well it’s more like 80%...”

“Have you considered just how unhealthy that is?”

Tony nodded, “Yup, I’m working on it...Anyway, speaking of. I reckon you’re just as much of a loner as I am. I bet you didn’t keep in touch with anyone once you came here.”

It was then that Tony realized he probably wasn’t being as subtle as he’d planned because Loki closed his eyes and sighed, “This game doesn’t seem as fair if you’re using my estranged brother as a source of information.”

Tony held up his hand in a sign of innocence, “I’m just trying to level the playing field. I can’t help the swathes of information about me on Google. I need something.”

Loki’s expression had become hard, “Did he put you up to this? I understand he's probably bitter about what happened but I didn’t expect him to get you involved.”

“No one put me up to this,” Tony replied perhaps a little too quickly to be believed.

Loki’s expression didn’t change, he simply regarded Tony expectantly, clearly not buying his lie.  

After an awkward second that felt a lot longer, Tony sighed and rubbed and hand over his face and started speaking before his rational mind could stop him, “Ok, cards on the table. I like you. I like this,” he gestured between them, “which is a relatively new concept. Ok no, it’s not new, it’s just foreign, especially since...” he trailed off and decided not to mention Afghanistan. It seemed like a backwards step when this whole spiel was already a step outside his comfort zone, “Doesn’t matter. But what does matter is that you should know I’m still in a pretty delicate place, you know, mentally. I’m better than I was but there’s still a road ahead. But that’s beside the point,” he shook his head as he realized he was rambling. What was he doing? “What  _is_ the point is that, while yes, Thor did ask me to help him find out what happened in those years you’ve apparently been MIA, this whole thing is about me trying to get to know you. Because if it turns out you’re up to your neck in something underhand, I rather know now before it’s harder to back out.”

Loki exhaled through his nose, “The rules of this game are getting a little blurry.”

Tony narrowed his eyes, “Look, you. I’m having a relatively rare moment of emotional clarity and I’d appreciate that you respect how vulnerable I am making myself right now,” he reeled off the words his therapist had taught him almost word for word, “Then we can go back to the game after. I'”ll even add a dare or two in.”

There was something warring Loki’s mind as the man looked away. Despite the school expression on his face, that much was obvious. Tony did his best to quell the rising worry in his stomach. He took a second to make sure it was nothing major, but it wasn’t anxiety or panic. It was just the normal human fear of throwing yourself off a cliff and hoping someone will catch you. The seconds stretched out for what felt like an eternity as Loki held his own silent debate that he did not feel the need to include Tony on. After a while, Loki set his glass on the table beside the empty wine glass and lifted his gaze back to meet Tony’s. He had lost that relaxed, casual demeanor he had a second ago. His movements were slow and deliberate, and when he answered, he spoke as though each word had been selected with excruciating care. 

“There is a...significant part of my life, both past and present that I simply cannot share with you Tony. Not now. And that is not a fault of yours, nor Thor’s, nor, to an extent, my own. It is simply a fact,” he paused and Tony could see that a hint of that sadness he’d seen a couple of times before, but it was buried under an expression of schooled neutrality.  It was the same sadness that he had seen the night they’d first met. 

Tony was silent as he tried to find the words for an appropriate response. Before his rational mind could gather them together, the side of him that could not stand to sit in this expectant silence any more answered for him, “Are you a prostitute?”

Unexpectedly, Loki gave a breathy chuckle and his expression cracked a little before it was quickly recovered.

“Because, I’m not judging. I mean you’ve got the looks, and the skills, and the-”

“I’m not a prostitute Tony,” the brief smile on his face fell away. 

Finally, Tony’s rational side fought to the fore and provided the response he had needed. He hesitated for a moment before asking.

“Do you need help?”

Loki regarded Tony silently, as unreadable as he had ever been, “Why would you ask that?”

“Because you’re wearing make-up to cover a bruise on your face.” Tony hadn’t noticed until a short while ago after Loki had inadvertently brushed a part of it away when he’d leant his head on his hand. If not for that, he wouldn't have seen it, it was so well done. A fact in itself did not bode well.

Loki’s mouth pinched and he looked away again, turning his head slightly so the bruise was no longer visible. He was quiet for a moment before looking back. 

“Tony if we are being truly candid, I should to tell you that company such as yours is something that I haven’t been able to enjoy in...let’s say a long time. I acknowledge that there are some difficulties in my life that I should address but that is much easier said than done. I imagine if you have spoken to Thor as much as I think you have, I suspect you will have learned as much as I can tell you myself. I am sorry for having to keep you in the dark...I truly am sorry,” there was an odd gravity to his words that Tony wasn’t sure he completely understood. It seemed as though the apology was a revelation to Loki as much as it was to Tony. “Despite that, I would like very much like to follow whatever this is between us as far as it can go.”

It was an answer that both quelled that rising fear in the pit of stomach and ignited a different spark. Tony sat and digested what Loki had said. There was definitely something off about him but it didn’t feel threatening. There was one thing that stood out though. He had not denied that he needed help. 

“I have one condition,” Tony stated, doing his best to regain a lightheartedness to the evening.

“Which is?”

“You need to bury the hatchet with Thor.”

Loki scowled and opened his mouth to argue but Tony raised a finger. 

“He is going to be hanging around this building for a while and if you see yourself coming back here on the regular I’d like to keep the blow outs to a minimum if I can.”

Loki closed his mouth and practically pouted. 

“Look the worst that could happen is that the guy hugs you so hard your ribs break.” 

Loki smirked, “You know him quite well I see. I actually spoke to him not long after you called me the other day. I’m seeing him tomorrow.”

Tony grinned and snatched his glass up from where he’d placed it, “Alright! Down the rabbit hole we go,” he held his glass up expectantly. 

Loki hesitated before a small smile graced his lips and he picked up his own glass to clink against the glass of Tony’s. 

*******

Loki lay beside Tony in the dark. He wasn’t sure how long it had been since they’d retired to the bedroom, let alone how long since they finished and actually closed their eyes to sleep. Or at least Tony had. Loki didn’t think he would sleeping at all. He still had to sort through everything he had said earlier that evening and work out what was truth and what was lie. The line was already blurry. He was hard pressed to find anything that had been a lie. Although he had convinced himself that he couldn’t say anything that could be disproved and so by sticking to omissions and half-truths he was carrying out his mission to the best of his ability. 

But he hadn’t expected to have been so transparent to Tony in so many ways, both intentionally and not. In all the years he’d been doing this, no one, not a single soul had even guessed at the fact that he might be anything other than ‘the man who could want for naught’ he had been portraying. Loki had spent much of the night damning Thor as the reason for this transparency. But the more he thought, the more he realized that Tony was more than likely to have come to this conclusion on his own. 

And the man wanted to help. 

Perhaps it was good that Thanos had cut his time back. He could not afford to be here for much longer. Things were already becoming too complicated to navigate. 

The problem was that the man that Tony was drawn to was simply Loki, not a construciton or a fake. But that meant that Loki had to react in an honest way. Had to think in an honest way. Feel everything in an honest way...He had already literally told Tony that he was sorry for what he was going to do. And the worst bit was that he meant it. 

He was brought out of his thoughts as Tony shuffled beside him. The man was laying on his side facing away from him. He had fallen asleep quickly and had remained still since. Loki took a moment to admire his tussled hair, the slope of his neck and the slight of exposed shoulder before the sheets covered him. 

Why was this so difficult?

Tony flinched sharply. 

Loki frowned at the sudden movement. It didn’t seem like just a regular sleep twitching.

His suspicions were confirmed when Tony sat up violently with a half-suppressed yell. It was dark in the bedroom, but Loki's eyes had adjusted enough to see the man’s silhouette sat up in bed. He could hear fast, anxious breaths. Loki forced himself not to react. If he didn’t react now he could work out what to do. 

Tony remained where he was for a second, taking deliberately long, schooled breaths before he swung his legs off the bed, bent to grab what Loki presumed was a pair of pants from the ground, pulled them on and left the room. 

Loki stayed where he was. That was the aftermath of a nightmare, which was not unexpected given what Tony had gone through less two years ago. The question was how to react to it. At this point, Loki was well placed to simply ignore it, stay where he was and pretend it hadn’t happened. It wouldn’t be the first time Tony had had to deal with this, he would be ok. That was what the rational part of his mind was telling him. 

But there was another voice. A relatively new voice. One that reminded him that Tony had helped him out of a bad place at least twice now. And Loki knew how it felt to wake from a nightmare and have to face it alone. 

“Damn it,” Loki muttered softly to himself and kicked off the covers. He found a pair of pants and pulled them on, unsure to whom they actually belonged, it didn’t really matter. With that he left the room. 

He found Tony sat on the sofas where they’d been sat just a few hours prior, leaning forward with his head in his hands, his fists clenched over handfuls of hair. The only light in the room was the soft orange glow of New York City that filtered in through the glass wall of the lounge. Loki paused in the doorway, slightly unsure of how to approach. 

It was Tony who broke the silence though, not looking up from where he was, “Sorry. Didn't mean to wake you up.”

Loki didn’t move from the doorway, “You still get nightmares about what happened to you…”

“Sometimes. Who knew being kidnapped for 3 months isn’t something you just get over...” he trailed off and lifted his head from his hands and stared out over the city, “You can leave now if you want. It’s ok.”

Loki frowned, “Leave? Why would I leave?”

Tony shrugged, “Lots of reasons. Not sure I’ve heard them all, but I’m sure I’ll get there one day. They usually come about now.”

Loki took a deep breath and tried to ignore that tug on a heartstring he’d almost forgotten he had. He crossed the room and quietly took a seat beside Tony, “I know what it’s like to have to deal with something like this on your own. I’m not going anywhere.”

Tony didn’t look at him as he sat down, “Any handy tips on how to get rid of them? Nightmares I mean.”

“Well sitting in a dark room on your own isn’t recommended,” Loki regarded him quietly as he settled in the corner of the sofa, leaning back into the seat, arms resting along the back cushions, “Come here.”

“You want to cuddle them away?” Tony said sarcastically.

“Tony someone as smart as you should know the chemistry at work here. Your body has been flooded with adrenaline and other neurochemicals that will linger in your system until they can be dismantled. Skin to skin contact won’t speed that up but it will release counter balances, oxytocin for one that can lower blood pressure and reduce anxiety,” Loki paused to let Tony think about it then continued, “Besides, I’m cold. Now come here."

Tony looked at him for the first time. He ran his eyes over Loki, silently assessing before he shuffled across a little and turned so he could lean back into the space Loki had created, his back against Loki’s chest, his head resting in the crook between his neck and shoulder. Loki moved his arm so that it lay across Tony’s bare chest the man’s messed up hair brushing his ear. 

“When I was a child, I had awful nightmares,” Loki spoke calmly as he could, “I’d wake up screaming and crying. I can’t say that I remember why, not that it matters, but somehow Thor would always hear me. He’d come into my room and sit with me for hours until I was calm enough to sleep again. I often woke the next morning to find he’d not actually left.”

“I thought you guys weren’t real brothers,” Tony said quietly.

“Not legally. My parents died when I was very young. It was Thor’s father that took me in,” Loki answered without thinking about the consequences of telling the truth about his family, “He raised me. I owed him a lot.”

“Thor never mentioned that.”

“No, I suspect he didn’t. When I started at Asgard, people often questioned my credentials. Claimed that I was only there because of Odin and Thor. Thor didn’t stand for it of course and so would refer to me to strangers as ‘like a brother’ but quickly correct anyone else who said that. He can be a little overprotective sometimes,” a soft smile played at Loki’s lips at the memory. He let it settle. No one could see it. What harm would it do?

Tony was quiet for a moment before asking, “Did it help? With the nightmares?”

“It didn’t stop them,” Loki replied honestly, “But I stopped being afraid to fall asleep. I knew that Thor would always be there to chase away any monsters my mind could conjure.”

“Sounds nice,” Tony mused. 

Loki lifted his hand to lace his fingers through Tony’s thick dark hair resting them gently on Tony’s head, “Is it working?”

“Jury’s out,” Tony murmured, although there was a soft sleepy edge to his voice, “Further tests required.”

Loki chuckled, gently stroking his thumb back and forth through Tony’s hair. A sudden tiredness fell over him. He could feel Tony’s chest rise and fall with calming breaths, his skin giving a gentle, comforting warmth where it lay against his own. He let his head settle back against the cushion behind him, a little too tired to be conscious of the fact that he shouldn’t be enjoying this moment. 

“Hey Loki.”

“Mm.”

“...Thanks for…you know...not bailing.”

Loki’s smile widened. Not that anyone could see. What harm could it do?


	9. Chapter 9

“Tony...”

Tony had been dozing for at least an hour after the summer morning sun had rudely awaken him at some stupid time, streaming in through his lounge window. But he was too comfy to actually move to anything to remedy the situation. He could feel the warmth of Loki’s chest behind him and the man's arm was still laid possessively over his chest. He pretended not to hear the soft voice somewhere close to his ear. 

“Tony, wake up.”

Sadly, it appeared that Loki would not be ignored. Tony hmphed softly, “Five more minutes mom.”

“No, get up,” Loki said firmly, shuffling under Tony’s back, “And please never call me your mother again.”

Tony exhaled forcefully through his nose and cracked open one eye, “What time is it?”

“Day,” came the sarcastic reply.

Tony closed his eye again, “No shit, Cogsworth.”

“Will you please just sit up? I can’t feel my arm.”

Tony gave a reluctant groan and pulled himself upright, stretching out muscles that weren’t used to the unusual sleeping angle. There were no clocks in here and so Tony had no idea what time it actually was, only that it was far earlier than he was used to. His half-lidded eyes locked on the coffee machine across the room.  He stood and walked towards it. 

“Jarvis, what time is it?” he asked. 

“It is 7:33am, sir.”

“Ungodly...” Tony muttered. 

“Umm...”

It was only then that he realized what he had done. 

Despite the fact that Jarvis had been in existence for nearly a decade, he was largely a secret to the general population. Even though he monitored the whole building, he was only audible in Tony’s personal areas and the offices and labs of the nearest and dearest. The vast majority of his employees were unaware of his existence. In his bleary morning state, he had just revealed this to Loki, a man that he had known all of two weeks. 

Tony spun on the spot, hoping that some other reasonable explanation for the disembodied voice answering his questions would pop into his head by the time he had to meet Loki’s gaze. The man had stood up from the sofa and was pointing at the ceiling where the voice had come from, eyebrows raised in question. 

“That was...um,” Tony was sure that had he been awake for just a little longer this would be a lot easier, “God damn it,” he sighed and wafted a hand, “Loki, Jarvis. Jarvis, Loki. Say hello.”

“Good morning Mr. Laufeyson.”

Loki blinked and looked around at the ceiling a little confused, “Good morning...Jarvis is an AI?” he looked back to Tony. 

“Jarvis is just a rather very clever system. He is my first born.”

“I was created by Mr. Stark as a natural language software for his computer systems.”

“And been with me ever since,” Tony finished, smiling fondly up at the ceiling, “Now he looks after more of the company than anyone other than Steve and Pepper.”

Loki raised an eyebrow, “Even you?” 

 “Especially me. When we built this place, he was installed in the fabric of the building. He monitors the lab equipment, secures the secure areas, and most importantly keeps my calendar. He’s my greatest creation.”

“Thank you, sir.”

“You’re welcome buddy, keep up the good work.”

A thought seemed to flicker across Loki’s face, but once again it passed before Tony could work out what it was. 

“You impressed? You should be impressed.”

Loki just smirked at him. 

“Also, I’d rather you didn’t go advertising his existence, if word gets out, everyone will want one. Took me long enough to make the one.”

“My lips are sealed,” Loki pulled his finger and thumb across his lips to emphasize his point. 

“Good,” Tony turned back to his coffee machine, “What’s the rush to get up anyway?”

“Well other than my arm losing circulation, I have arranged to go see Thor this morning. I thought that his office here in Stark Tower would serve as useful neutral ground for what might be a difficult conversation.”

“Oh! Good for you,” Tony then paused and looked over his shoulder at him, “Do I need to make sure there’s extra security down there?”

Loki smiled, “No. I promise it will be entirely civil. But would you mind if I used your shower?” 

Tony shook his head and pointed to the bedroom door, “It’s through there. Use whatever you want, the cleaners like to stock it and I don’t know what half of it is anyway.”

Loki nodded his thanks and strode towards the door. Tony paused in his coffee making to watch him intently as he walked away until the door shut. With that he picked up his coffee and headed out onto the balcony. There was a slight chill in the air leftover from the night before, but it was warm enough for him to be out in just the loose trousers he’d thrown on in a hurry last night.

The nightmare had been similar to usual. The same series of flashbacks pulled from the memories that conscious Tony had largely been able to process and bury away. But his subconscious always seemed to find a chink the armor and throw them back at him three-fold. Usually he’d just get up, go to the workshop and hammer away at something metal until he was so tired, he wouldn’t dream. But as the workshop was only on the floor below the penthouse bedroom, it wasn’t exactly the behavior of a good host. And so, resigning himself to the lounge had been a reasonable alternative. 

He’d not expected Loki to follow him out. And he’d certainly not expected him to be able to have the impact that he had. Back in Tony’s darkest days not long after his return, there had been many people see his night terrors. No one important. Usually just whoever Tony had picked up a few hours before. They rarely stayed the night after that, and even more rarely contacted him afterwards. His troubles had reached the gossip columns not long after. From there, the progress of Tony’s spiral of self-destruction had been documented almost daily.

 It had all culminated with a high-speed crash that had very nearly killed him. The papers made a fortune that day. 

While he was still in his hospital bed, his nearest and dearest had rallied, staging an intervention and forcing him into therapy. They did have a bit of an advantage in that Tony was wheelchair bound for at least a month. Well supposed to have been at least. It was only in the last half a year or so that the magazines had finally left him alone now that he was actually starting to lead some semblance of his old life, with a much-reduced public appearance schedule however. 

Tony grimaced at the memory of it all and shook his head to clear his mind, back to the point he had been making to himself. Which was that in all that time, he’d not had anyone do what Loki had done for him last night. 

Tony sipped his coffee as he watched New York city go about its business far below, pondering what he would do with his day now that he had been forced into it. Maybe he’d make a start on interpreting his dad’s notes. 

The sound of the door to his apartment opening and closing drew his attention but he didn’t look over his shoulder. There was only one person it was going to be. There was a couple of quiet footsteps before Loki came to lean on the railing beside him, sadly now fully clothed.

“When are you meeting Thor?” 

“There wasn’t a specified time, but he said that he would be around from 8am. I'd like to get it over and done with,” Loki replied, simply.

“Do you want me to show you where he set up shop?”

“I appreciate the offer, but I’m sure I can find it, no need to trouble yourself.”

“Well that’s good, because I don't actually know where it is. You coming back here after?”

“I can if you like but I can’t stay, I have some matters to attend to,” he made that face that Tony had now learned was reserved solely for when he was speaking of his works. 

“Don't even get weekends off hm? That’s rough.”

“Mm, I must simply enjoy what time I have,” Loki smiled at Tony and stood upright, reaching his full height. Tony instinctively stood up as well, but once again came up disappointingly short. “Will you be here all day?”

“Probably, just let Jarvis know when you’re heading back, he’ll find me.”

Loki raised an eyebrow, “I’ll just ask...the building,” he chuckled to himself a little, “Ok well then I will see you in a little while.”

As he turned to go, Tony protested, “What, that’s it?”

Loki looked back with a confused frown but it only took a second for the penny to drop, “Tony I will be gone an hour at most.”

Tony scowled and Loki rolled his eyes playfully before leaning forward and pressing a soft, chaste kiss to Tony’s lips. He lingered there for a second or so before pulling back only slightly.

“Can I leave now?” he asked. 

“Hang on, not sure, better just double check,” he rambled the response and quickly kissed Loki again. After a moment, he pulled back, “Ok yup. I think we’re good. But next time you might not be so lucky.”

Loki laughed. Not just the reserved chuckle Tony had heard so far, but a genuine, infectious laugh. Tony couldn’t help the smile that broke through his poker face. 

“I’ll keep that in mind,” Loki chimed, taking a step back, “Now, I really must be going. Have a nice morning Tony.” With that he spun on his heels and strode for the elevator. 

*******

Loki leant against the wall of the elevator once he’d selected the right floor and peered up at the singular camera in its back corner. Was that Jarvis? 

The revelation that the security in this building was run by a hyperintelligent artificial intelligence was yet another significant blow to Loki’s plans. If the computer was throughout the very fabric of the building he imagined it would not be hesitant to simply report back to Tony whenever Loki happened to ‘stray’ from his route. It ruled out the option that he had to get out of this without having to entangle himself any more in Tony’s life. 

The only way now was the hard way. 

He had considered briefly whether this Jarvis was what Thanos had been after, but if Tony has been in possession of it for a decade it is unlikely that it would have only come to his radar now. It wouldn’t surprise him if Thanos hadn’t sent one of his other agents after it in the past. Unsuccessfully of course. It was also a testament to Tony’s secrecy that Jarvis was not more well known. Or perhaps it was in the right circles. He should look into that. If someone knew more about it then they might know a way around it. 

He filed the thought away as a problem for another day as the elevator came to a stop on the floor that Thor had told him. 

Their conversation over the phone had been thankfully brief, Thor was clearly a little unsure about how to talk to Loki following their less than successful previous meeting at Tony’s party. Loki simply told him his intent to meet and Thor had given his directions to the temporary office that Tony had provided in Stark Tower. 

He stepped out of the elevator into a small lobby with a door to his left and to his right made of the steel and glass that indicated that there was likely research spaces beyond. There was a single camera peering at him from the ceiling directly across from the doors. Loki regarded it for a moment, curiously. 

“Jarvis, which way to Thor’s office?” he asked hesitantly, feeling a little stupid as he apparently talked to himself. 

There was no disembodied voice but after a moment the door to his right swung open. Tony was right, Loki was impressed. He nodded his head in thanks to the camera and headed through the open door. 

The door opened out onto the balcony of a two floored room. A set of stairs to his right descended into the open room below and the balcony carried on round to the left where there a single door was set into the wall. As with all of the major rooms in Stark Tower, the largest wall was glass. The open space below was set up like a cross between a workshop and a laboratory. It was full of machinery of metal and glass but there was none of the polished sterile finish he would have expected from a chemical or biological lab.

He couldn’t tell what it was designed for. The only thing he saw that he could guess at the purpose of was a machine that took up a section of the back wall of the room below. Inside the glass front he could see a piston moving up and down repeatedly, pressing onto what looked to be a thin sheet of silvery metal. A computer screen showed an ongoing graph that fluctuated with the movements of the piston, peaking as the piston pressed onto the metal, bending slightly, and then flat lining as the pressure was removed. Presumably this whole set of rooms were under Thor’s management in whatever this joint venture was that he was talking about. Were they developing a new metal? 

His first instinct was to get closer and see what he could learn, but yet another camera pointed directly at him from the ceiling over the machine reminded him that it may not be the best idea. 

He looked up as a door opened a little way off to his left where the balcony followed around the left wall. 

 Thor emerged from a room beyond and smiled upon seeing him, although not as fully nor carefree as he had when they had first laid eyes on each other at the party. 

“Br-,” he started then coughed and corrected himself, “Loki. I didn’t expect you to be here so early.”

“I was in the neighborhood,” Loki replied, turning towards him and shoving his hands in his pockets, “I was just admiring your work here. May I ask what it is?”

Thor came up to stand beside him, looking into the room with the working machine, his hesitant smile became a proud beam, “Do you remember the stories that father told us when we were younger, about our namesakes?”

“You mean the Viking gods?”

Thor nodded, “We’re attempting to recreate Mjolnir.”

Loki looked at Thor skeptically, “The hammer? That’s just a myth, how can you recreate something that’s never existed?”

 “Always so cynical, Loki,” with that he turned and started back towards the door he had emerged from, gesturing for Loki to follow. 

“It’s not cynicism Thor, it’s basic logic,” Loki continued as following a step behind Thor as the man opened the door and stepped through, “You can’t copy something that was never created-”

He cut himself off when he entered Thor’s office. It was nothing out of the ordinary for Fortune500 companies. A spacious room with a good view out over the city as Loki imagined was the case with almost every room in this building, furnished with the standard up market black and silvery desks, chairs, shelves, bookcases, and even two small sofas around a low coffee table. But none of that was why Loki had paused. 

Set in a glass case behind the desk was a large hammer, with a head larger than Loki’s and a handle about a foot long. The metal was dulled with age but the shiny glint of silver could still be seen underneath, edging the engravings that wove out what Loki just about recognised as ancient nordic writing. 

Thor closed the door behind them and crossed to the sofas, “It was found at the bottom of a fjord by chance.”

Loki was silent as he approached the glass, not wanting to give Thor the satisfaction of knowing how surprised he was. Though his mind was racing. Was this it? Was this what Thanos wanted? It was not his usual prize, it was not exactly insignificant. Besides, Thor would be an infinitely easier mark than Tony. Although, infinitely more painful at the same time. 

“Father knew it was an opportunity not to be missed and approached Tony not long after he realised that we lacked the resources to carry it out ourselves.”

“And you are managing the work?” Loki asked, trying to quash that bitter jealous that arose suddenly at the thought of the success that Thor had experienced in his absence.

“Father said it was about time I experienced the world,” Thor replied, taking a seat

Loki turned away from the glass case of the hammer. There was no point in making assumptions on the whims of Thanos. But he would certainly be reporting this back, “Evidently, he is still unaware of the multiple forays into wider Europe we undertook.” 

Thor laughed, “I don’t believe him to be so naïve...” he trailed off but his smile remained in place, “They are fond memories.”

Loki gave a hum in agreement.

“I’m glad you called, Loki,” Thor said after moment, “I couldn’t bear to leave things as they were after our last conversation.”

Loki came around to sit on the sofa across the coffee table from him, crossed his legs and spread his arms across the back of it, “Which one? The one at the party last week, or the one six years ago?” he’d asked the biting question before he could stop himself. 

This act would be harder than he anticipated. He was not here to lay his angst at Thor’s feet, but to foster enough of a superficial relationship to garner what information he needed to get through this whole shitshow. But the added factor of difficulty came in that Thor was possibly the only person on the planet who could routinely tell when Loki was lying. Years of practice, he supposed. 

Thor faltered a little at the question, “I am truly sorry Loki. For everything. My actions and my inaction. Both have clearly caused you no end of woe.”

Loki was silent as he tried to work out how to react. The apology was not a surprise. There was once a time when Thor was a young man that would do anything to avoid taking responsibility for his actions, but as he had matured, his pride had thankfully waned. But that didn’t diminish the impact the words had on Loki. 

It only just then struck him that he was sat across from the brother he had resigned himself to never seeing again. That familiar tide of rage had risen when Thor had first emerged from the office but it was not the monumental surge that had come at Tony’s party. It rose, it plateaued, and now as Thor sat before him meek and genuinely apologetic, the tide was receding. A new pull began to fill the void. Loki wanted to reach out. To ask for help from Thor, from his brother, who had reliably reached back and pulled Loki from his darkest places every time he had needed it. 

But what would Thor think when he learned that his little brother, whom he protected and defended with every fiber of his being, was nothing more than a cowardly criminal, too scared of facing his own reality that he only really played at life. What would he say when Loki told him that his father was nothing more than the same? 

It was not a choice that Loki would be successful in, and even now he could not bring himself to force Thor to make it. 

After a moment, he exhaled and rubbed a hand over his face. 

“Thor, I’ve been here for six years now, and if nothing else that has given me ample time to reflect on how exactly I came to be,” he looked at Thor, “I can't tell you the whole story, but you should know that it is not your fault.”

Thor frowned, “But what you said at the party...”

Loki shook his head, “I was drinking and I was angry. I didn’t exactly expect to run into you, Tony hadn’t mentioned that you would be present.”

Thor was clearly not convinced, “You know you’re still not a good liar.”

“You know that’s still not true,” Loki smirked.

A hesitant smile pulled at Thor’s lips, “I see you haven’t changed too much.”

“I try not to.”

Thor heaved a sigh that matched his size, “What happened to you? Truthfully.”

Loki set his mouth in a line, “If Odin hasn’t told you Thor, then I don’t think that I can either.” 

It was a carefully chosen statement. There was no way that Loki could just reveal all and expect Thor to believe him and turn on his own father, nor could he lay out everything that was happening with Thanos for fear that Thor would take matters into his own hands. It was not threat used often anymore but Thanos made a point of regualrly reminding Loki that they still held evidence of everything Loki done while in Asgard’s employ and should he attempt to get out, they would release it. Then everything would come down around not only him, but Asgard may well crumble as a result. He couldn’t do that to Thor. 

But this way, it might pique Thor’s interest enough to question Odin. If it came from Odin’s lips, then Thor could make his own choices. 

Thor clearly wasn’t happy with the reply but nodded anyway, “Well it may be that he will be more forthcoming now that Tony has asked him.”

Loki blinked and sat forward, “I’m sorry, what do you say?”

“Oh, sorry I presumed Tony would have told you himself,” Thor shrugged, “He has asked father for your work history there. I wouldn’t take it personally, he has a lot to try and protect. If anything, it is a good sign, it means he wants you to stay around.”

Was nothing going to go right? Loki was taking all the right steps. He could cope with not knowing what he was looking for. He was navigating the uncertainty of Tony knowing his name. He was dealing with the Thor issue. And now this. 

“Do you think he will give it over? The work I was doing was highly confidential.”

“In all honesty, I don’t know. I supposed it depends on how greatly he wants this collaboration to work.”

Loki took a deep breath, attempting to relax his now racing heartbeat, sitting forward and leaning his arms on his thighs, staring at the floor. 

“Would there be something in there that would be a problem?”

Loki’s eyes ticked up to meet Thor’s, “Almost all of it. I should go,” with that, he stood and turned for the door.

“Wait! When are you next here?”

Loki paused in the open door of the office, “I don’t know,” he replied, almost regretfully over his shoulder before slipping out. 


	10. Chapter 10

 After Loki had disappeared off to his morning bout with Thor, Tony had slipped down here almost immediately, pausing only to refresh his coffee mug and don a shirt. From there he had set Jarvis to work scanning the drawings and notes that Bruce had given him while he set about understanding them properly, highlighting what was important, discarding things that had since been disproven. It was what he had spent the morning pulling together. Maybe there was something to this early bird thing, he wondered as he realized this was possibly the most productive he’d been in a while. Though it was more likely that it was simply because had a new, interesting lead that he wasn’t going to let get away. 

The workshop now glowed with gentle blue light, lit solely by a range of holograms that hung suspended in the air, practically littering the room. Models of atoms and nuclei interspersed with a number of handwritten notes that hovered between structures in glowing blue, lines connecting words and scribbles to specific sections of atoms. They ranged in size from just a couple of centimeters to one that stretched Tony’s full height. Most of them had been copied directly from his dad’s notes, while others were some initial thoughts or suppositions on Tony’s part. 

Tony sat in his wheelie-chair at the room’s center, turning in a slow circle giving all the shapes a passing glance, sipping his coffee. There was something missing here, but that was obvious form the beginning. If his dad could have figured this out, it would already be in production. But he hadn’t been far off. With a bit of work, Tony imagined he could have it together in a week or so. The question then was how exactly to create the element.  

“Sir, Mr Laufeyson is waiting in the penthouse,” Jarvis tuned in polite as always, “Should I ask him to come back later?" 

“No that’s ok, I best make sure he didn’t render the mighty Thor incapable,” Tony gave one final spin on his chair before getting to his feet and heading for the door, the holograms dissolving and reforming around him as he walked straight through them, “Tell him, I’ll be there in a sec. Keep this warm for me though bud, I’ll be coming back to it.” 

“Of course, sir.”  

“You’re my favorite!” Tony called as he jogged up the stair from the workshop back into the lounge.  

Loki was indeed already there. He stood at the glass wall, hands in his pockets, looking out over the city, apparently not aware that Tony had come. Tony paused to admire just how good Loki looked silhouetted against the early morning sky. Once he’d decided he’d admired sufficiently, he let the door swing audibly shut behind him, drawing Loki’s attention. The man turned and looked at him with a hint of surprise on his face.  

“I didn’t expect you to still be in the apartment,” Loki commented, then looked past him to the door Tony had just come from, “One of many secret retreats I presume.” 

“You could call it that,” Tony replied as he crossed the room.  

“What would you call it?” Loki asked, raising an eyebrow at him.  

Tony just regarded him for a second then dismissed the question without answering it, instead using the tried and tested method of simply moving the conversation along as he stopped in front of Loki, leaning his shoulder against the glass wall and folding his arms over his chest, “You know, I wasn’t expecting you back here. I had my money on Thor.” 

Loki smirked, “I can assure you that Thor suffered only minor injuries.” 

Tony nodded in mock seriousness, “Good to know, I need him alive.” 

“I imagine so. It looks like interesting work you’re conducting down there,” Loki went back to looking out over the cityscape. 

“He showed you the hammer didn’t he?” Tony rolled his eyes, “I swear that guy loves that thing more than people.” 

“I would not be surprised if that were true, we grew up on stories of that hammer,” Loki replied, that hint of sadness lacing his words, but then he closed his eyes and shook his head slightly as if trying to shake the thoughts away with it.  

“How’d it go anyway? You guys besties again?” 

Loki gave a short laugh, “No, I think that will take a long time. But there is an armistice in place. Do not fret. Although he did say something that I wanted to ask you about.” 

“Oh yeah? If it's about what they’re doing, it’s mostly under non-disclosures,” Tony shrugged apologetically, “Not that I know much about it anyway.” 

Loki paused before finally looking back to him from the city, a new intensity in his gaze, “Did you requisition my history from Asgard?”  

It took Tony a second to remember that, yes he actually had done that. At the time, it was nothing more than a flippant email to Odin, just to see who Loki was. He'd sent it even before he’d sat down with Thor about him. As soon as he realized that he had his best source of information on the guy much closer to home he’d forgotten the email existed. It had mattered so little at the time that he hadn’t actually braved his inbox to recover any reply he might have gotten. He should get around to that inbox at some point... 

Loki interrupted his slipping thoughts, not taking his gaze away, “Did you, Tony? I need to know.” 

The determination in his question piqued Tony’s curiosity, “Why? Worried I’ll find your sordid affair with your secretary.” 

Loki’s mouth pinched and it looked like he withheld a snapped response but instead said, “The work I did at Asgard is highly confidential, I don’t want to have those files out in the open.” 

Tony frowned, “Well, if they’re that bad then Odin won’t send them. No big deal.” 

That didn’t seem to satisfy Loki, who swallowed, “You don’t understand, Tony, it is a big deal.”  

Big deal was another one of those phrases that sounded foreign in Loki’s more refined accent. Not that Tony disliked it, quite the opposite in fact. Tony filed the memory of the words away and stood up straight, unfolded his arms and held them up in a peace gesture, “Look I only asked him because when you practically dared me to find out who you were I had no idea that you and Thor would be so linked. I just wanted to win the game.” 

Loki looked back to him, no change in his demeanor, “If it is already done then please just promise me something.” 

 Tony narrowed his eyes a little suspiciously, “What?” 

“If you get my record, promise me you won’t read it,” Loki replied, simply.  

“And why shouldn’t I?” 

“Because it’s the record of a different man in a different life, whom you won’t want to see again after you’ve read it.” 

Tony couldn’t help but chuckle, “Sounds fun, now I’ve got to read it.” 

Loki didn’t share his mirth, “I’m serious Tony. Surely you can understand the want to leave the past in the past,” he took a half step forward to close the remaining distance between them, took one of Tony’s hands in his and held his gaze with a determination that made Tony’s smile fade, “Please, just, promise me, Tony.” 

Tony’s eyes flicked between Loki’s searching for any hint as to what was making his react to this so viscerally, but there was nothing but a genuine fear he wasn’t sure he liked to see there. His gaze ticked down to the bruising on his cheekbone. He'd re-covered this morning before he’d gone to see Thor but if you knew it was there, there was no hiding it. After a second, he gave a defeated sigh, “Ok fine. I promise.” 

Relief visibly swept through Loki the man’s shoulders relaxed but thankfully, he didn’t let go of Tony’s hand, “Thank you Tony. I know it simply adds to the concerns you shared with me last night, but as I said, it is a history which ended six years ago and I’d prefer to leave it there.” 

“Yeah well, it’s not like I’ve learned any less about you,” Tony replied.  

Loki gave a small smile, “I promise you’ll learn more if you give me a chance to show you.” 

Tony scowled up at him, “You’re going to make me work for this aren’t you?” 

Loki’s smile grew into that full rare full grin that Tony was beginning to love to see, “Every little thing,” he confirmed before looking to New York once more, “Sadly, I should be going.” 

“You can read time from the sun?” Tony asked, skeptically, adding the fact to list of things that made no sense about this man.  

Loki looked back to him, “You can’t?” he asked and then smirked at Tony’s disbelief, “I’ll see you soon, Tony,” he said softly and with that he leant forward and pressed a kiss to Tony’s forehead before taking a step back to turn for the elevator.  

“Hey!” Tony called after him, but Loki only turned and began taking his steps backwards instead, “When’s soon?” 

Loki raised and lowered his shoulders in a slow shrug, “I’ll leave that up to you,” he smiled as he finally stepped back into the lift that had opened behind him and disappeared behind the doors.  

********** 

Loki decided to walk the journey back to his own apartment. He needed the thinking time.   

How could he have been so stupid? He should’ve known that reaching out to Odin would be first thing that Tony would do on learning they knew each other. 

Though there was some solace in the fact that Tony clearly had either not received or not read any files that may have been sent to him and he wasn’t sure that Odin would allow that kind of information to leave his own control. It was a risk to him and to Asgard.  

Thor on the other hand...Now that Loki was outside away from Stark Tower, he realized how risky his interaction with Thor had been. This was not a game, dammit. This was his life. Why had he felt the need to basically dare Thor to find his answers with his father? What difference would it make if Thor found out what had happened to him? All that would happen is that he would rush into Asgard, demand answers from his father and then what? Thor would hate his father, Loki would feel a note of vindication, but ultimately, he would still in Thanos’s chains. It changed nothing. The threat of release of information that could ruined Asgard and Thor was still hanging over his head like a knife tied to a fraying rope.  

The distance he was putting between himself and Tony had also served to make Loki aware that he had allowed himself to enjoy his night with Tony too much. When he had sat with him, comforted him, he had done it out of a genuine feeling of concern and empathy. They were foreign, but not unknown feelings. He simply hadn’t had occasion to apply them in his time here in New York. He knew what they would lead to in the long run. Nothing but an excruciating goodbye and so he’d worked hard to wall them off a long time ago. 

So why was it so difficult to keep them locked away with Tony? It wasn't just the sex. He'd used sex as a tool in his work many times before with little to no issues. But for whatever reason, this felt different. 

Once he reached his apartment, Loki went immediately to his planning room and set about updating the wall with the snippets of new information he had collected.  

Mjolnir went up there, nestled close to the old photo of Thor. Though he didn’t not pay to too much attention. It was unlikely that it was his target. He added a note about the door that Tony had emerged from, the purpose of which Tony had been deliberately evasive about. He added the fact that Tony and Odin were clearly in open communication, and of course the risk of records being handed from one to the other. Finally, he scribbled out the question mark next to the ‘PTSD’ note he’d applied to Tony now that it was confirmed.  

With that Loki took a step back and pulled out his cell phone. It was time for his weekly check in. He had not been in contact since he had been struck last time. They seemed to be mostly content to leave him alone for now, but Loki knew that if he did not keep to schedule, Thanos would find ways of catching up with him. He had done it before.  

The phone was answered quickly.  

“I have an update,” Loki stated.  

“What is it?” the man’s voice somehow seemed to make Loki’s cheek throb anew.  

Loki ran his eyes quickly over the board once more, “I have discovered the work that Stark Industries and Asgard are developing together. It is a new metal, based on an ancient artifact disocovered in the Fjords of Norway.” 

There was a short, heavy pause before the man said, “Do you think that is what Thanos wants? An old rusted hammer?”  

It was not a genuine question. It was sarcastic and biting, making Loki feel a fool for even mentioning it. He held back his initial comment with which was want to remind the man that he still had no idea what Thanos wanted from this project, but he hesitated and reconsidered the question, “I merely wished to demonstrate the advance in trust that I have been making with the target.” 

“Might I remind you, it is Tony Stark, not your brother, who  is the target, Laufeyson,” the man drawled, “I hope his presence is not becoming a distraction.” 

“Of course not,” Loki replied flatly.  

“Then perhaps you are trying to deflect attention away from Stark himself.” 

Loki set his jaw, “No.” 

“Good... I hope you have more interesting news for us next week,” with that the man hung up. 

Loki sat down in the chair behind him and leant his forehead in one hand, letting the cell phone lay on the arm beside him. He’d made significant steps into Tony’s circle of trust. He knew that. Why didn’t he tell that man? That he now knew of a secret room within Tony’s penthouse that could hold anyone of the secrets that Thanos was chasing? Perhaps he thought that if this was the answer then the Thor would prove an easier target.  

Almost as if his mind was trying to answer the questions for him, the image of Tony sat alone in the darkened lounge flashed across his mind.  

Loki balled his hand into a fist and brought it down hard on the arm of the chair in frustration, sending the cell phone bouncing to the floor. He made no move to retrieve it.  

After a moment of remaining still, he looked up to the timeline sketched out over the top of his board. Three weeks had gone. He was a quarter of his way through his allowed time and things had only gone downhill.  

He was struggling to see even a glimmer of the light at the end of the tunnel. All he could see was the two ways this would end.  

Number one, he would fail and finally find out what happened beyond that door in Thanos’s office that he knew he would never come back from. Or number two, Tony would get the records from Odin, he would read them, and he would be the one to swing the final blow.  

Of the two, it was the latter that Loki much preferred the idea of. Tony would deserve it and at least that way, Asgard had a chance of surviving. It was unlikely that Tony would allow them to go down too. He wasn’t that kind of man.  

Even if he did succeed, what then? Simply more of the same.  

There was still some time though. He had two months remaining.  

Perhaps though...perhaps he could find another way before then. Perhaps it was time for him to try find a way out again. It had been a long time since the thought had even crossed his mind, the concept had seemed just so unobtainable. He scowled up at his timeline. Two months was not a long time, but it might just enough. Not that he had any idea what he could possibly do yet. But whatever happened, he would rather meet his inevitable failure knowing he had done something to try to prevent it.  

For now, he just had to try to walk the tightrope between Tony not finding out what he was doing, and Thanos finding out what he was not doing.  

It would be a tricky path. But Loki was no stranger to tricky.  


	11. Chapter 11

The rest of Tony’s weekend had passed in a hologram lit blur. It was one of those weekends that required regular input from Jarvis to remind him to eat, drink, and eventually sleep. He didn’t actually see the sun for more than twenty minutes total. He hadn’t had days like that in a long time, not since the dark days. But this wasn’t like then. This time he was actually working, thinking, doing. This was like his time before Afghanistan when every day was spent locked away, producing some of the most cutting technology that existed. Some of which had yet to be surpassed.  

And that was what he was doing again. 

Though that didn’t stop the programming that Tony had been forced to add to Jarvis when Pepper and Steve had decided that they wanted their weekends off babysitting. Now, alongside his biometrics, Jarvis would chime in with reminders to eat or drink. Much to Tony’s distaste he had also had to build a failsafe into Jarvis’s programming that meant should Tony be in the workshop for more than ten hours straight, Jarvis would shut it down. 

It had been activated the day before, forcing Tony to go to bed at the reasonable hour of 2am Monday morning. 

It’d been a thankfully uneventful night and he’d slept through until a familiar alarm chimed through his bedroom and sunlight spilled through the windows as blinds were risen automatically. 

“Sir, Ms Potts and Mr Rogers are awaiting your usual Monday briefing,” Jarvis announced, before the alarm’s chime recommenced.

Tony shuffled into his pillow and mumbled, “I’ll be there in a minute.”

After a contemplative moment, he pushed himself out of the covers, knowing that the alarm would not cease until he did. Having done nothing but remove his top before crawling into bed last night, he was still wearing the loose sweatpants from the day before. Tony scanned the floor for something appropriate to wear and settled on a t-shirt from a couple of days ago. It may even have been the one from yesterday, he wasn’t too sure. He yanked it over his head, scooped his phone from where he’d tossed it the night before and finally left his room. 

Steve and Pepper were sat where they always sat on a Monday morning, around his coffee table, talking idly, already having helped themselves to coffee. There was a set of folders laid out and ready to go. Tony was pleased but not surprised to see a third coffee cup set out on the table, alongside a plate a single pastry. They were good to him really. 

“So, you’ve got the resourcing call with marketing at 3pm on Wednesday, does that mean you’re happy for me to catch up with Wakanda on my own?” Steve was asking, flicking through a black leather diary in his lap.

Pepper nodded, “Sure, that makes sense. Sounds as though you’re getting on quite well with them.”

They smiled at Tony in greeting as he approached and snagged the coffee and pastry off the table but he largely ignored them. The coffee was cool enough for him to knock back in just a couple of mouthfuls and immediately go back towards the coffee machine for a refill, making a start on the pastry on the way.

“And good morning to you too Tony,” Steve greeted, and even with his back to them, Tony could picture that wide sarcastic grin. 

“Jarvis told us you had quite a long weekend,” Pepper commented.  

When had his favorite AI become such a tattletale? Tony chewed through another mouthful of pastry before answering, “I had a productive weekend,” he corrected, taking his coffee and turning back to join them at the sofa. He took a seat on an armchair so he could face both of his PAs, who were occupying one sofa each, “I’ll have you know, I broke my record on Saturday morning. Got up at 7am. Did you know they still have 7am at weekends?”

“Yes Tony,” Pepper raised an eyebrow, that knowing half-smile on her face, “Did you get up of your own accord?”

Tony regarded her for a moment, then lifted his coffee to his mouth, “Sort of...” he muttered into his mug. 

“And how is Mr Laufeyson?” Pepper asked brightly. 

“Absent,” Tony replied quickly keen to nip that conversation in the bud at the earliest opportunity, “Isn’t this supposed to be a working breakfast?”

“It was but it’s now 11am,” she answered back. 

“Brunch then,” Tony shrugged, sitting forward with mock eagerness, “What have you got for me?”

Steve flicked through his diary, “In all honesty, it’s a relatively quiet week for you this week. There is a board meeting on Friday that it would be good for you to come to,” Tony immediately started to roll his eyes in response and so Steve continued quickly, “It’s just to show your face for a couple of hours, pretend like you’re interested in what’s going on and then you can do whatever you like.”

Tony snorted and slumped back in his chair, sliding far enough down the backrest that he was almost horizontal, “Ok great, what else?”

“Peter has made a bit of breakthrough with something on his project that he’d like to show you,” Pepper read from a note she’d made in her own book and Tony immediately paid attention, “But he’s only free Thursday. Would you mind coming down to see him about lunch time on Thursday? I did say you might not be-”

“Why would I not be?” Tony replied immediately flicking his gaze to her, "I’ll be in my office from 11. Next.”

Pepper smiled fondly at Tony’s reaction but continued on with the next item on the agenda, “There are some applications for funding and scholarships that I’ve set up for Friday afternoon,” she reached out and placed one hand on the folders on the table, “I’ve told them no more than half an hour each.”

Tony sat up at that and pulled the pile of folders towards him. One of the first things he had established on the reformation of Stark Industries was a series of scholarships and funding pots that would be available for any almost any philanthropic cause. There usually weren’t many as they weren’t as well advertised as they could be. Tony always gave half an hour to any application which was all he needed to determine whether the application was genuine. 

“Anything else?” he asked before finishing his pastry in one last mouthful, dusting off his hands and selecting a folder at random, pulling to towards him. 

“Nothing out of the ordinary, I don’t think,” Pepper shared a look with Steve who shook his head, “No I believe that’s everything. Is there anything you’d like from us Tony?”

Tony had ready flicked open the first page of a file was reading idly through it as he remembered the one thing he’d told himself he was going to do this week, “Do you happen to know whether I’ve had any emails from Odin in the last couple of weeks?”

“A few no doubt, but it wasn’t on the list of priorities in your inbox,” Steve replied, “Would you like me to take a look for you?”

“Just let me know if there’s anything about Loki in them,” Tony said distractedly. It would be a miracle of Odin had sent anything. The man had been a fairly hands-off collaborator, happy to leave everything to Thor. Tony wasn’t actually going to bother checking to see whether he’d sent anything through. But Loki’s sudden reluctance that even bordered on fear of Tony reading his history had sadly had the exact opposite impact that Loki had hoped for. 

Pepper frowned, “About Loki?”

“Mm,” Tony confirmed, not looking up from the folder.

Steve and Pepper exchanged another look, before Steve asked, “How come?”

“I wanted to check something out,” Tony half-shrugged as he glanced up momentarily, “Something he said the other day just brought up some red flags. Probably nothing.”

“What did he say?” Pepper asked.

“He asked me not to read his Asgard record,” Tony flipped the folder closed as he came to the realization that mom and dad weren’t going to let this one just be a quick conversation. 

“I wouldn’t worry Tony,” Pepper told him, an obvious sense of relief washing away that initial look of concern that had flashed briefly across her face.

“I didn’t say I was worried,” Tony said flatly.

Pepper continued anyway, “Just think of all the people who work for you who wouldn’t want their record out in the public eye.”

Steve interrupted with a timeless hum, “I don’t know, I can see where Tony is coming from. It is a little odd.”

“And it’s not a little odd to want to read a guy’s resume before you settle on dating him?” Pepper retorted tuning to face her colleague.

“Well it’s probably not a bad idea when you’re in Tony’s position,” Steve answered back.

Tony took a deep breath and relaxed back into the armchair as he watched the exchange through half-lidded eyes. He knew he shouldn’t have mentioned anything and just had Jarvis find it. Why hadn’t he just Jarvis do it? He hardly ever argued.

“I don’t know I think it would be good for someone in Tony’s position to put himself out there a little more,” Pepper continued brightly, “It’s not like Loki’s done anything to warrant this.”

“That we know of,” Steve pointed out raising an eyebrow, “Thor doesn’t even know what he did at Asgard as far as I know.”

“Well do you know exactly what Bruce does here?” Pepper asked, raising a victorious eyebrow as Steve conceded the point with a shake of his head, “I think it’s just a little much to be demanding histories from people Tony gets involved with.”

Tony sat quietly watching as his PAs argued, wondering if they were going to ask his opinion at any point in this debate about his personal life. 

“Actually, you know, I think I see what’s happening here,” Steve said as though struck by a revelation and turned his gaze to Tony for the first time. Took him long enough. 

“Do you, Rogers?” Tony asked, not sure if he was actually glad to be suddenly included in his whole discussion.

“Mmhm. You’re nervous about a new relationship Tony,” he started and this time Tony did a full eye roll, “It’s perfectly natural. You’re nervous because you might have actually found someone who can put up with you for more than an hour at a time and you’re worried you’ll get attached enough to get hurt if something happens.”

Tony sighed. He should have known not to bring up Loki with these two. Although they’d dialed back their fussing, it still reared its ugly head at every new situation, as though they for some reason had forgotten he had survived a fair stint of adulthood without them, “You could’ve saved me a hell of a lot of money if you’d told me a year ago that you’re such a good therapist.”

Steve’s smirk remained steadfast but it was Pepper who spoke, “Clearly Loki hasn’t given you any real reason to break things off or else you’d have done it already. You must like him at least a little bit.”

“Although I do have to say it's a little coincidental that he just pops up like he did,” Steve commented.

Pepper frowned and turned back to Steve, “He didn’t just pop up though did he? Tony found him drunk in a bar.”

Tony scowled, “Are you in on that Stark email blast as well?”’

Pepper glanced back at him briefly but ignored the question and continued speaking to Steve “Coincidences happen all the time. Whatever Loki did or does is clearly highly confidential. How many non-disclosures have we signed over the years?”

Although not involved in the discussion, Tony still quietly considered what they were saying. They made very good points as always. He took the lull in debate as a chance to run past them the one thing that was actually worrying him more than he’d like to admit.

“Ok a curve ball for you,” he said as he sat up right again, gaining their attention, “What would you say if I told you I think he’s in trouble?”

Both Steve and Pepper paused at that, but it was Steve who spoke first, “Did he say that it was work related?”

“He did almost everything but say it.”

“I’d say it sounds like he needs help rather than distrust, Tony,” Pepper said carefully.

“Sure, agreed, but I can’t help him if I don’t know what he does and I won’t know what he does if he won’t let me read his record,” Tony explained, watching them both for their reaction. 

There was a tense moment as Steve and Pepper chose their next words.

“You’re going to read it anyway, aren’t you?” Steve inferred.

Tony held his hands up in a shrug, “I’m not seeing any other options...”

Pepper leant forward at that, “Might I point out how much damage you might do to this relationship-”

“Relationship is a strong word,” Tony pulled a face.

Pepper continued as though he hadn’t spoken, “If he has explicitly asked you not to.”

“What else am I supposed to do?” Tony asked exasperated. 

“Well how about, just getting to know him, like a normal person, go out on dates, talk,” Pepper suggested as though explaining the concept to an alien, “You never know, if you get to know him a little more, he might actually tell you.”

Tony wrinkled his nose, “Seems inefficient.  I suppose we could try that Chinese takeout place down the street...”

“I mean actually  _go out_  on a date,” Pepper reiterated with a smirk, “What does he like to do?”

Tony blinked as he realized he had no answer. For all his probing questions and background research the only hobby he’d identified Loki as having was drinking. Which was admittedly one they shared, but he suspected that that was not what Pepper had in mind. 

“Ask him,” Steve suggested helpfully, “It’d do you good to get out. Especially if it’s not to a bar.”

“Aw but mooom,” Tony moaned. 

Steve just raised an eyebrow, “No buts young man. Ask him.”

With that, the two PAs stood as having practiced headed for the elevator, already starting conversation on their own work for the day. 

Tony sat and sipped at his coffee and considered the concept. Dating. It was not familiar, even before Afghanistan. He had always maintained that billionaire playboy kind of vibe and for the most part that had been enough. But things were different now. He was different. There was no denying just how much the last two years had changed him. Having come so close to death on multiple occasions was probably going to do that to a guy. 

Now as he sat on his own in his penthouse he realized just how quiet it was. How empty. He realized after a moment he was staring at the sofa opposite him. Where Loki had found him. And sat with him as he fought his own psyche. How good it had felt not to be on his own.

But what if there was something up with Loki? 

And did it really matter…

******

 Monday found Loki laid dozing on the sofa, music playing quietly in the background. 

There had been an unexpected relief that had come just from the very thought of simply letting go. Since his decision on Saturday, Loki had removed that constant shadow of responsibility that dogged his every move. Allowing himself to focus on nothing but his own eventual departure. Not that he knew how he would pull it off or even where he would if he managed it. 

He had spent all of Sunday going over his options. There weren’t many, but there some immediate actions he could take in preparation. 

The first thing was to start to withdraw cash. Not right now and not in large enough quantities to raise any suspicions. No, over the next two months he would have to withdraw little and often and eventually collect enough to sustain him for a little while after his Thanos controlled cards were cancelled. Which they would be as soon as there was any hint of his betrayal.

The second action was to determine exactly what information Thanos had on him and on Asgard. It would probably be the most difficult and require more probing into them than he’d like but the only alternative would be to reveal all to Thor if only to give him an early warning of what was coming. He’d like to avoid that if at all possible. The less Thor knew about any of this the better. If he’s learned anything from his brief reunion with his brother it was that, despite everything, Loki still cared about what Thor thought of him. 

Thirdly and finally, he had to maintain a working relationship with Tony, at least for the majority of the time. No doubt Thanos would be monitoring Stark in some distant way and his sudden absence from Stark Tower would be reported. 

Over the last day or so, Loki had come to the realization that he had enjoyed his short time in the man’s company. He had defied all expectations that Loki had had. He had expected to find the usual rich boy bravado presenting a flimsy mask of philanthropy that many of his tax bracket kept handy. But Tony wasn’t like that. Perhaps he had been once upon a time. Now though, the Tony that Loki had met had a heart. 

There was a part of Loki that wished that they could have met in a different life. Tony was the one person who had seen through his flimsy shields and personas to the man beneath. The man who was so bent and broken that he had resigned himself to his life on a leash. But Tony had seen that, and he hadn’t looked away. 

And after the weekend, Loki was beginning to see something of his own struggle in Tony. When he had found him sat alone, scared in a darkened room, Loki had sat with him, for no reason other than genuine empathy. He had cared. 

Thor had somehow smashed through the walls Loki had spent years building when he had turned up. And it had allowed Tony to find his way in. It was a shame that it would have to eventually come to an end. There was a part of him that wished he could have met Tony in a different life. Things could have been so different... 

But once again he reminded himself this was no longer about winning or losing the game, he had to stop playing. Tony was not enough to stay.   

For now, though, he still had two months and there was certainly worse company for Loki to spend it in. He just had to make sure he didn’t make it too hard on himself when he eventually had to leave. If he could help it.

His cell phone vibrated on the side table just beyond the arm of the sofa. Loki reached over his head and swatted at the table in an attempt to find it. He was not rushed. A single buzz meant a text message and there was only one person who had begun to text him. 

_You busy?_

Loki regarded the message for a moment, considering his answer before typing,  _Would_ _it make a difference if I said yes?_

Immediately his phone began to ring. Loki couldn’t help the half-smile that grew on his lips and as usual waited until it had almost rung off before he answered. 

“I’ll take that as a no,” he said in greeting. 

“If you were that busy you wouldn’t have answered,” Tony replied with that echo Loki now knew to mean that he was on loudspeaker. Probably through Jarvis. 

“Are you in your workshop again?” Loki asked, enjoying the concept of asking merely out of curiosity without having to mentally record whatever answer Tony gave, “Do you ever leave?”

“Sometimes. Sometimes I have to host,” Tony replied with an oddly distracted tone.

“Must be so awful,” Loki commented, still smiling, “Having to interact with human beings so regularly.”

“Some of them aren’t bad.”

“Hm, well how can I help you this morning Tony?” Loki asked closing his eyes and relaxing into the sofa a little bit further, “Or did you just call to tell me how not bad I am?”

“Background noise helps me think.”

 Loki snorted and raised an eyebrow, “Charming.”

“Consider it a compliment, I chose you over AC/DC,” Tony explained.

“You know I won’t hold it against you if you just admit you wanted to speak to me.”

“Yes, you would.”

“Only a little.”

“Anyway, I actually have a question for you,” Tony continued, swiftly moving the conversation on before Loki made him admit it. 

“Oh?” Loki raised his eyebrows but his eyes remained calmly closed.

“What do you do?”

Loki sighed, “Tony I’m sorry but we’ve already had this discussion I can’t tell you that.”

“No, I mean when you’re not doing that. What do you do in your free time?”

Loki opened his mouth to reply only to falter when no answer came. He hadn’t exactly hadany ‘free time’ since he had started his work with Thanos. Not that he would have been allowed any hobbies even had there been time to enjoy them. He struggled for an answer to Tony’s question, “I can’t say I’ve had any since I’ve been in New York.”

“That’s impossible.”

“Sadly it isn’t,” Loki replied, finally opening his eyes and sitting up. 

“Alright well what did you do while you were at home? At Asgard I mean?”

“Why so curious?” Loki asked, genuinely wondering. It wasn’t the usual line of questioning of someone who was suspicious of him, but then again Tony was not usual.

“Because.”

“You’re going to have to do better than that Tony.”

He heard Tony huff before answering, “Alright well because mom and dad have said I need to get out more and I don’t think I actually have any hobbies that they would consider ‘healthy’ so I was hoping that you might be able to shed some light on what kind of activities they might include.”

Loki exhaled as he thought. It seemed like this was just an honest, if round about, way of Tony attempting to arrange another evening together. He’d not thought about hobbies or past times or idle evening activities for years. They had seemed like such unobtainable luxuries that there was no point in even contemplating them. But at Asgard, he’d had a rich social life. What had he done back then…

After a moment an idea came to him and he asked, “Have you ever been ice skating?”

“Sounds awful,” Tony replied immediately.

“Have you ever been?” 

“No.”

Loki raised an eyebrow and sat back into the sofa cushions, crossing his free arm across his chest, “Then how can you say it’s awful.”

“I didn’t. I said it  _sounds_ awful. Big difference.”

Loki chuckled, “Well you asked for my hobbies and there you have them. I could take you if you like.”

“And show you my impression of Bambi with broken leg? Not a chance.”

“The great Tony Stark is balking at the idea of a little ice? Incredible,” he could hear Tony mumble something but it wasn’t loud enough to be picked up by whatever microphone he was using so Loki continued on, “How about we play a game. Give me an hour, I wager that I will I have you racing.”

“So, I learn a functionally useless skill and you win the game. Or I win which by definition requires me to somehow fracture a limb. Sounds very fair.”

“A fractured limb certainly isn’t a requirement. Are you refusing my challenge?” Loki smirked to himself. If there was one thing that he’d predicted correctly about Tony, it was that the man would never back down from a challenge.

Tony was silent for a few moments as he undoubtedly tried to come up with some elaborate excuse as to why he couldn’t possibly go through with this. But it was evidently a futile endeavor when he eventually conceded, “Ok fine. But when I have to get stretchered off you’re being my personal nurse.”

“I assure you, you’re in the most capable hands.”

Tony gave a skeptical hum.

“And afterwards, I’m sure I can find other ways to put my hands to good use.”

Something crackled loudly at Tony’s end of the phone and Loki laughed, “Perhaps you should go back to your music if you’re looking to concentrate.”

“Mm…” Tony seemed to agree, “Alright well text me the nights you’re free and I’ll set something up. Probably mid-week when the ambulance crews are more readily available.” 

“Of course. I shall see you later this week then Tony,” with that he smiled to himself and hung up. 

It was an odd feeling, being able to simply enjoy talking to someone. He hadn't quite realized how much he'd missed it…


	12. Chapter 12

Tony didn’t call again for a couple of days. Whatever he was doing to try to get out of ice skating he was putting a lot of effort into it. Not he was out of contact completely. Every couple of hours or so, Loki’s phone would buzz with some inconsequential message, usually a complaint about what his PAs were making him do. Or sometimes it would be an anecdote about Thor. Loki didn’t always reply. Only because he was unsure of how to. It had been a long time since anyone had attempted to hold these long, drawn out conversations over text and he found he was out of practice, often overthinking his response so long that Tony had moved on. 

There were long stints of silence which Loki had learned to take as Tony was working in his workshop. A fact that should have been of incredible importance. But now, he found himself just waiting for his phone to go off again, indicating that Tony had finally come up for air. 

Those hours were not empty. Despite having made the decision to come out from under that immense shadow of Thanos, there was still planning to do. 

He stood for a moment and regarded his planning wall. The bits of paper, the few photos were still stuck in their places with marker lines connecting them. By his own former standards, it was meagre. There was no information useful to Thanos here. Which was a good thing Loki supposed. The first thing that would happen once he was gone was that this apartment would be raided. If he had gleaned anything, they would get their hands on it anyway. 

With a deep breath, he began to strip it back. He pulled the papers from the wall and piled them on the coffee table behind him then he erased his hand-written notes and scrubbed the timeline from the board itself. It was immensely cathartic, and he felt a small smile pull at his lips as he progressed until the only things left were two photos. 

Loki reached out a gently took the photo of Thor and carefully unfolded it so that his own face could be seen beside Thor again. There was now a white crease cracking the colour in a straight line between himself and Thor in the photo. Poetic, Loki supposed looking back to the wall, keeping the photo in one hand. 

At the very centre of the otherwise bare wall, Tony looked back, grinning out of his paparazzi photo. He looked younger than the man that Loki knew. More sure of himself, comfortable in the media’s scope. It was most likely taken some time ago. There were not many media shots of Tony from the last two year. None that were flattering anyway. 

Loki couldn’t help but smile back he admired the photo. 

After a moment of deliberation, Loki didn’t take it down. Instead he slid it across the wall and into the corner, where he fixed the photo of himself and Thor alongside it. A reminder, he reasoned to himself, of the two people that broken through and made him realised that he could not continue on like this. The ones that now he had to get away from, if only to protect them. 

He exhaled and shook his head. There was no time for sentiment. The clock was ticking.

His phone buzzed from the arm of the chair. Ringing this time. Loki turned away from where he was drawing out a new timescale and plucked the phone from the table and answered it quickly, knowing full well who it was going to be. 

“So, have finally you selected an ice rink that meets your stringent safety standards?” Loki asked in lieu of greeting.

“They don’t exist,” Tony replied simply. There was no echo this time. No speaker phone, no workshop, office maybe? Not that it actually mattered. 

“Oh Tony, it sounds like you’re backing out of my challenge,” Loki responded smirking to himself.

“That’s not what I said, and not why I’m calling,” Tony shut down that line of conversation in that exceptionally efficient way he had no doubt picked up from years of intense business negotiations, “You busy tonight? Or do you have vampiric duties to attend to?”

Loki hesitated. He had backed himself into a corner as of their recent conversation when he had told Tony that he had barely any free time at the moment. For Loki to suddenly be able to meet him for an evening at the drop of a hat may come off a little suspicious. Instead, another half-truth emerged from Loki’s thoughts and he answered, “I’ve actually taken a sabbatical from work. I’m freer than I have been in a while.”

Tony paused at the other end of the phone. Maybe the half-truth was not the best course of action, “What brought that on?”

Loki took a seat in his armchair and looked up at the photos on his wall as he replied, “A number of things. I’ve actually been considering it for a while.”

“How’d your boss take the news?” Tony asked, an unusually serious tone to his voice. He clearly had not forgotten seeing the bruise on Loki’s cheek the last time they saw each other. 

Loki gave a nervous chuckle, “I have yet to tell them.”

“Interesting leave policy you’re working with there.”

Loki gave a hum of agreement and sat back into the plush cushion of the chair, “Anyway, you were going to invite me somewhere.”

“I was. Drinks. Tonight.”

“What’s the occasion?” 

“No occasion. Just drinks.” 

“Drinks without occasion. A date then?” 

Tony hesitated, “Erm not quite, Thor will be there.”

Loki raised an eyebrow, “Oh would you look at that, the vampire overlords need to see me. It seems I’m very busy after all."

“Yeah nice try. If you’ll remember, Count Grouch, you made a deal.”

Loki rolled his eyes, “Oh must I, Tony?”

“Yes, you must,” Tony replied, with a mocking imitation of Loki’s accent, “Thor’s been telling me stories about what he calls the good old days. Apparently, you used to be fun.”

Loki scowled, “Used to be?”

“Besides, I need someone to help me cajole Thor into a cab at some point afterwards.”

“And you think I’m the man for that job?” Loki said sarcastically, “I’m glad you could see my immense strength that would rival even the mighty Thor’s. I was worried I had hidden it too well…”

“Can’t hide anything from me babe,” Tony quipped and Loki blinked. It was a light-hearted, casual quip that probably meant nothing to Tony, he probably wasn’t even aware he had said it. But still, the term of endearment was more than Loki had heard in a long time. “Meet us at 230 Fifth, at like 8,” Tony continued on, ignorant of Loki’s reaction. 

“It doesn’t feel like I have much of a choice,” Loki replied, not that he would have said no anyway. 

“Huh, weird. See you later!” 

Tony hung up. Loki sighed and rubbed a hand over his face. How pathetic was he that a simple pet name made him react so? Was this really what he had become? 

He did not have any further time to consider the answer to that question though, as his thoughts were interrupted by his phone ringing once more. Loki read the number with a frown. It wasn’t recognised, nor was it anything to do with Thanos, as far as he knew. After a second of deliberating, he answered.

“Hello?”

A woman’s voice replied, “Hi, is this Mr Laufeyson?”

“Speaking,” Loki said, cautiously. 

“Hi, this is Pepper Potts, one of Tony’s personal assistants, I don’t believe we’ve had the pleasure.”

A mix of relief and curiosity washed through Loki. Of course, he knew who Pepper Potts was. Her photo was one of the many now stacked up on his table and Tony had spoken of her often and highly. Even if he did regularly complain about her mothering. 

“Ah yes, Ms Potts. I’ve heard a lot about you.”

“I hope that you don’t mind my calling you, Mr Laufeyson, I got your number out of Jarvis’s databanks.”

“Not at all. I had hoped that we would have met in Stark Tower already. Tony speaks very highly of you.”

Pepper chuckled at that, “Well I’m glad he praises me to someone.”

Loki smiled, once again relishing the concept of simply talking to someone. Not having to analyse every word, search for the emotions that fuelled them, work out how he could use them to his advantage. No, now he could just have a conversation, “What can I do for you this afternoon Ms Potts?”

“Well, you’ll have to forgive me once again, but I overheard Tony inviting you out to drinks later with Thor. Are you going?”

“Most likely, Tony doesn’t leave a lot of room for no.”

“You’re not wrong. I’m just calling because as you probably know, Tony hasn’t really been out casually in public for a long time now,” even down the phone Loki could hear pain in her words at just the memory, “During his recovery, it just became too difficult and the media were…well they were the media. They aren’t very forgiving. And don’t get me started on social media...”

“I can imagine it was hard.”

“It was, Mr Laufeyson. So, while he has been to the odd fundraiser or snuck out late at night for a drink here or there when he thought we weren’t looking, this is probably the first time he will be out where he can’t control the room, the crowd. He won’t be able to just turn the lights on and shut it down at a whim. Not that he won’t try. But people will probably recognise him. They might even try to engage him.”

“If it is scandal that you are worried about, Ms Potts, I will happily keep my distance while we are out. I understand the reputational impacts that can occur.”

“Tony is no stranger to scandal,” Pepper joked, “No, I was actually going to ask to you to do the opposite.”

“Oh?” Loki frowned. 

“As much as he might like to avoid it, I don’t think Tony will ever be the same again. Crowds affect him more than he would like to admit. I was hoping that…well…could keep an eye on him? Just give him something to ground himself on. And someone to tell him when it’s time to go.”

“Of course.”

Pepper breathed an audible sigh of relief, “Thank you, Mr Laufeyson. I appreciate this may be a lot to ask of you considering the relatively short time that you and Tony have known each other, but I don’t want to stop him from going out. And from what I understand you are somewhat familiar with what he is struggling with.”

“Somewhat, yes,” Loki replied, once again picturing Tony sat alone in the lounge, tearing at his hair.

“Oh also, please could you not tell Tony we spoke? It’s hard enough to make him work in his office without him knowing that Steve and I can hear most of what he does in there.”

Loki smirked, “Your secret is safe with me, Ms Potts.”

“I’m sure we’ll cross paths around Stark Tower one day,” she paused as though about to hang up but another thought occurred to her, “You know, I think you being there with him as more than just a friend might actually work in his favour. Show people he’s doing better. Anyway, you’re a busy man Mr Laufeyson, I’ll leave you to your day.”

“It was good to finally speak with you Ms Potts, I hope that we meet in person soon.”

Loki sat forward as his put the phone down, letting his forearms rest on his thighs as he thought. 

Why was he doing this? Why was he bothering to go to these drinks? He could just as easily maintain his charade to Thanos within the confines of Stark Tower. It was unlikely that either himself or Tony were being physically followed so this evening would likely never be known to Thanos. There were so many risks around drinking, particularly with Thor. The man could hold his drink but he was a handful when it finally overwhelmed him. Besides that, Loki was not exactly in a particularly stable place, there was no telling what he might feel like divulging after enough alcohol. Plus, he was coming to the end of his fifth week, leaving only seven remaining. There was no time for this. 

Pepper had highlighted a new risk he hadn’t considered before. Tony was a high-profile mark. Being seen out in public with him, maybe even photographed or recorded, would ruin any secrecy that Loki had enjoyed. He would no longer be a no one that could slip in and out of projects without leaving a trace. It could ruin him as an asset to Thanos. 

And what of his old targets? They could recognise him and know where to find him, or Tony. 

It took a moment of concentrated thought before Loki found his answer. He was doing it because he wanted to. He wanted to spend time with Tony. He wanted to enjoy a night with his brother as if nothing had changed between them. He even wanted to be there for Tony as Pepper had asked. There was no logic, no reason whatsoever. He would simply have to maintain a certain distance with Tony while they were out.

Loki licked his lips and swallowed, almost angry at himself that this reasonless evening so such a daunting prospect. Because if he could not do something just because he wanted to, he might as well stay on Thanos's leash. 

What would one night possibly do?

*****

The sun was low in the sky but its rays were still warm on Tony’s skin as he sat on the cushioned bench of the bar’s rooftop terrace, whisky in hand. 

He had been a little worried about this evening. He’d not been out to a public bar in at peak time like this in months, maybe even coming up to a year. All he’d managed was sneaking out for a drink alone in a men’s club where talking was practically prohibited. But he decided he couldn’t say avoid it forever when Thor had asked him and Loki to drinks that evening. Thor was understanding enough to let him choose the location and Tony had called ahead to make sure they knew not to publicize his presence. It might be a little prideful but he was fairly sure that he would be mobbed by people attempting to get a photo or a signature or whatever else from him that might get them a few likes on social media or a couple of bucks out of a magazine. 

There had been a little note of unrest as he and Thor had been dropped off by Happy outside the bar where he had been met by the manager and taken to the table that he had rung ahead and requested. But either no one had noticed him or no one cared that he was there. He had relaxed as the minutes passed uneventfully, his drink was brought to him and he and Thor were largely ignored by the sparse crowd that barely glanced in their direction. That was despite Thor’s somewhat indiscrete storytelling volume. 

“Sounds like the two of you were quite the duo,” Tony commented, checking his watch as Thor finished telling a story of how he and Loki had made a not insignificant sum of money hustling pool and cards as teenagers. 

Thor smiled and nodded, “Yes, we...” he trailed off and frowned at something over Tony’s shoulder, “Speak of the devil and he shall appear.”

“What’s up?” Tony asked turning in his seat see for himself without waiting for an answer. 

A little way off, he spotted Loki too. He was stood face to face with another man, gripping the man’s arm as if having pulled him back from walking away. There was a dark expression on his face as the man said something to him but they were too far off to hear what it was. Loki just gave a twisted smirk and replied. Whatever he’s said, it made the man wrench his arm from Loki’s grip and square up to him. Not that Loki was phased. If anything, he looked amused. Not a sentiment shared by Tony. While he was exceptionally quick tongued, Tony suspected that Loki may not come off well in a fight with the much stockier man he was apparently antagonizing.

Thor gave an exasperated sigh and lowered his drink onto the table, “Excuse me Tony,” he said apologetically and stood from the cushioned bench. 

“Happen often?” Tony asked. 

“It’s not unusual,” Thor replied with a smile before heading in the direction of his brother.

Tony followed him with his eyes as he made his way over. Loki’s gazed flicked sideways and spotted Thor approaching. At the sight, his expression shifted and he pointed at his brother, saying something to the man in the process. The man turned at the gesture and deflated immediately as he saw who it was that Loki was talking about. The brothers exchanged a few words and Thor folded his arms across his chest, watching the man carefully. 

Despite what both of them had said, having been apart for six years didn’t look like it had made much difference. The two brothers seemed to connect. Whatever was going on, Loki was able to convey it in just one line and Thor followed on immediately. It looked exactly how he had pictured Thor's stories. In truth, Tony was just glad they didn’t seem to be fighting, even if it was only while dealing with a common enemy. 

Tony frowned as Loki gestured in his direction briefly. Were they talking about him? 

Whatever the conversation was, the man was looking increasingly fearful as Loki and Thor appeared to be holding a conversation across him until he suddenly held his hands up in a gesture of peace. At that Loki smiled and Thor clapped his hands onto he man’s shoulders. The brothers had one more quick exchange before Thor moved off into the crowd towards the bar, physically guiding the man in front of him, meanwhile Loki finally covered the distance to the table. 

“Evening,” Tony greeted, as Loki came to stop at the end of the bench on which he was sat. 

“May I?” Loki asked, gesturing at the space beside him. 

“That depends,” Tony replied, “You gonna tell me what that was all about?”

“What what was all about?” Loki asked, feigning innocence. 

Tony gestured vaguely in the direction they had been standing, “You were talking about me.”

“Not quite,” Loki replied, stepping around the end of the bench, “If you don’t move up, I will sit on you.”

Tony did as he was told and shuffled up just enough for Loki to sit down, “He recognized me, didn’t he? And you stopped him from coming over.”

Loki took a second to sit down and get comfortable, “Yes.”

Tony raised an eyebrow, “You threatened him?”

“Not explicitly,” Loki replied casually, then looked out over the crowd, “In fact, I think...oh yes, look Thor is buying him a drink.”

“After you threatened him,” Tony pointed out.

“Not. Explicitly,” Loki repeated, with more emphasis, finally turning to look at Tony.  

Tony sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose, “Look, I appreciate what you think you’re doing but-”

“And what is it that I think I’m doing?” Loki asked.

“You think you’re protecting me from whatever it is you think might happen,” Tony said exasperated. There was a note of déjà vu as he felt like he was starting the same conversation he’d had a thousand times before with Pepper, “It doesn’t help. I’m a big boy. I can handle a fan. I used to have quite a few you know.”

“I don’t doubt it,” Loki said, then leaned closer and Tony felt a hand slide onto his thigh, “Perhaps I simply don’t want strangers feeling as though they can interrupt my time with you. You invited me to drinks and I would prefer that you weren’t distracted, is that too much to ask?”

Tony held Loki’s intense gaze for a moment before his meagre resistance broke, “I suppose not.”

The corner of Loki’s lips lifted in a half-smile, “Good. I’m sure you’ll have time for your adoring public some other time,” the hand on his thigh squeezed slightly but thankfully didn’t move away as Loki leaned back out of Tony’s personal bubble, “Besides he insulted you, and I’m afraid I can’t have that.”

“In that case, fuck that guy,” Tony laughed, deciding against asking what the guy had said. It wouldn’t make a difference to anything, “Is that your usual routine then? You start fights and Thor has to come finish them?”

Loki looked at him like he was an idiot, “Hardly. Quite the opposite in fact.”

Just as he said that, Thor emerged from the crowd, carrying three drinks held precariously in a triangle in his hands. 

“Is that right?” Tony asked him as he set them down on the table and set about organizing them, “The mighty Thor had to be regularly saved by his skinny younger brother?”

Thor gave a bark of laughter, “He had to save them from me,” he dropped onto the seat opposite them, spreading his arms out along the back of the bench somehow managing to occupy a three-man bench almost entirely. 

“Not always true is it, Thor?” Loki took a sip of the drink Thor had brought for him, a brown spirit of some description, before continuing, “Do you not recall the time you challenged the entire Jotun Giants ice hockey team to a fight?” Loki raised a pointed eyebrow at him, “Had I not stepped in you would have been beaten to a soft pulp.”

Thor laughed and wafted a hand, “Weaklings the lot of them. Ah!” he sat forward as a waitress approached the table carrying a tray with three shot glasses on it and set them out on the table, “Thank you Miss.” He smiled his charming smile and the lady nodded and disappeared into the crowd once more. 

“What is this?” Tony asked, picking up a glass and bringing it to his nose. It smelt of warm spices, cinnamon, cardamom and cumin. 

Loki did the same then frowned at Thor, “Is this aquavit?”

Thor smiled at his brother and picked up a shot himself, “I thought we could toast.”

“Did you?” Loki asked deadpan, but Tony could see the soft up-hitch of his lips as the man fought a smile. 

“It is a Scandinavian liquor,” Loki explained, apparently having sensed Tony’s confusion then looked back to Thor, “It’s not exactly common here.”

Thor was holding his shot glass up, “To family, and to friends,” he held his glass up to Loki and to Tony in turn. 

Tony grinned and lifted his glass to clink against Thor’s then waited for Loki to do the same. But for a second Loki hesitated, only the barest hint of what he was thinking on his face. Tony nudged Loki’s leg with his thigh and the man glanced at him momentarily before apparently coming back to reality. He grinned and raised his glass to meet those of Thor and Tony. 

Thor gave a wordless yell and the three of them threw back the drinks. 

The evening passed quickly. Quicker than Tony would have liked. He soon forgot why he had been so worried about coming out in public like this. Though he suspected those nerves were somewhat alleviated by who he was with. As irritated as he had been at first to think that Loki had assumed that Tony could not fight his own battles, that had quickly subsided. It was quickly replaced by the comfort of knowledge that he now apparently had two Viking brothers willing to back him up. 

Following that shot, it was as though some blockage had been broken in Loki. He had never seen the man more conversational. It was rare for Tony to be unable to get a word in edgeways, but the casual bickering between Thor and Loki was almost continuous. It was nothing vitriolic, or even mildly aggressive. For the most part it was amusing. Thor would regale Tony with grand stories that rivalled even those of the Nordic legends, while Loki would occasionally input with the actual details of the story. 

There was a part of him that suspected that Loki’s sudden sabbatical had something to do with his new-found relaxation, but now was not the time to investigate that. Bringing up Loki’s apparent bid to escape whatever working situation he was in would probably ruin the mood. 

The sun was well beyond the horizon and a number of empty glasses littered the table top when they finally made the decision to call it a night. The atmosphere in the bar was beginning to shift into its final and loudest stage and Tony wasn’t sure he was quite up for that just yet. Just making his way back through the crowds to the exit wasn’t comfortable. Despite being made somewhat easier by using Thor as a makeshift plough and the sensations being dulled by the numerous drinks, Tony still felt uncomfortably close to too many people. He thought he’d heard his name muttered somewhere in the crowd but he couldn’t be sure. But he kept his head down and focused on the feeling of Loki's hand in his as the three of them made their way out of the building. 

Happy and his car were waiting for them when they reached the street. 

Thor grinned as the trio came to a stop, “Well, I thoroughly enjoyed myself, we should do this again.”

“Sure, big guy,” Tony smiled and punched him playfully on the arm, “Now that I know the two of you can spend a couple of hours together without a shouting match."

Thor looked at Loki, “It was good to see you again brother.”

Loki nodded in return, smiling, “And you Thor.”

“You want a lift back to yours?” Tony asked, gesturing at the car. 

Thor shook his head, “No, thank you Tony, it is a nice night, I shall walk. I will see you soon.” With that he turned and started off down the busy street. 

“Ah well, his loss,” Tony mumbled then turned to Loki, “I can only presume you’re coming home with me?”

The man was stood with his hands in his pockets surveying the people passing by, apparently lost in thought. It looked as though he was looking for something or someone. 

“Hey, Earth to Loki,” Tony snapped his fingers and Loki turned his attention to him, “You coming?”

There was almost a pained expression on Loki's face as he replied, “Is it really a good idea for you to be seen with me getting into the back of your car?” 

Tony scowled, “Why wouldn’t it be?”

Loki took a breath. That sadness had returned to his features, “I’m concerned that being seen with me may mar the reputation you’re building yourself.” 

Tony scowled shifted to a genuinely confused frown as he realized he was being serious, “Can’t I decide who I sully my reputation with?” 

Loki smiled at that but it didn’t reach his eyes, “I shall have plenty more free time now that I’m not working, don’t fret.” 

Tony grunted and turned to open his car door, “Well more room for me,” he quipped lowering himself into his seat, “Later gator.” He shut the door after him. 

He watched Loki through the one-way glass. The man looked to the ground and smiled to himself for a moment before something seemed to occur to him and the smile dissipated. After a second, he lifted his gaze back to the car for just a second before turning and walking away down the street. 

What was that about? Tony had his suspicions. Pepper or Steve had probably gotten to him. Sneaky really. 

“A good night?” Happy asked from the driver seat as the car pulled away from the curb.

“Mm,” Tony replied watching the world go by out of the window.

“Oh, Steve wanted me to tell you that he found that report from Odin you were looking for.”

“Anything juicy in it?”

“He said he hadn’t read it, just printed it out and left it in your office.”

Tony nodded. It seemed he might finally get some insight into Loki after all.  


	13. Chapter 13

Loki had walked home the night before relishing the feeling of cautious optimism that had ignited following the evening with Tony and Thor. He had started to think that maybe, just maybe, there might be a life that he could reforge. If he could shatter the pieces of the meagre existence he endured now, perhaps he could pick them up and build something better. A life where he could enjoy a night of casual drinks on a Thursday without having to worry that he was drinking too much or too little, where he was not constantly watching the faces in the crowd for someone who might recognize him as what he truly was. A life where he could be someone that deserved to be with Tony.

That dream could not last.

It was around 11am the next day when knocking at his apartment door drew Loki from the planning room where he had spent the few hours of the morning. He frowned from its doorway, staring across the flat his front door. There was never knocking at his door. As far as he knew, the only people who knew where he lived was the superintendent of the building, who knew better than to knock without a phone call to warn him first, and Thanos. But if something so extreme had happened that warranted someone to be sent to find Loki at his boss’s behest, then they would not have the time nor courteously to knock first.

A second round of knocking, or rather hammering sounded, and the voice that accompanied it did nothing to quell the rising anxiety in Loki’s stomach.

“Loki!” Tony’s call was muffled by the door but it not quiet, “Open up.”

Loki swallowed. There could be no good reason for Tony to have hunted him down like this. Of course, the man knew the building he lived in but not the apartment and for Tony to have come down here to find him mid-Friday morning could not be in Loki’s best interest.

“I can wait here all day!” another call came.

Loki knew him well enough to know that it was not an empty threat. He quickly pulled the door to the planning room shut, making sure to lock it behind him, went down the corridor, and across the lounge to the front door. He laid a hand on the doorhandle and took a deep breath to try to settle his breathing. It didn’t work very well.

He had barely turned the handle before Tony shoved the door open and pushed past Loki into the apartment. The man was dressed in an expensive grey business suit and white shirt, clearly having come from the office. Any other day, Loki would have taken the time to admire what the man looked like when he actually made an effort. Today though, his attention was held by the pieces of paper that Tony carried rolled up in one hand. There was not many things that was likely to be.

Loki closed the door with a deliberately slow motion trying to counteract his increasing panic. His heartbeat was thudding in his chest, “I didn’t expect to hear from you until later. I thought you had your scheduled office appointments this morning.”

“Cancelled them,” Tony replied distractedly. He was pacing the lounge, looking around it, looking for something, “Nice digs you’ve got here.”

“Thank you,” Loki said. Minimalism was the key here. The less said, the less could be questioned later, “Can I ask who told you which was mine?”

“Lady downstairs,” Tony replied shortly as he finally stopped pacing and turned to face him, making eye contact for the first time, “Someone like you should be more careful.”

This was very bad. Loki narrowed his eyes slightly in what he hoped was a look of confusion, but in the state he was in it was becoming hard to control his features and he suspected it would only get worse, “Someone like me?”

Tony just gave a dark chuckle, “Don’t play dumb with me Loki, you’ve played me for a fool enough already don’t you think?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Loki could feel his heartbeat thudding but he ignored it, keeping all his energy is setting his features.

Tony held up the pieces of paper, “Odin sent me through some interesting reading. About you,” he jabbed the paper in Loki’s direction.

This was it. It was over.

Loki had known this was coming. He had become too comfortable, too complacent. Content to simply trust that perhaps the connection between himself and Tony was enough to avoid this. But how could he have expected anything more than he deserved, “You told me you wouldn’t read that.”

Tony grinned but the look in his eyes didn’t change, “Well I guess that makes us both liars doesn’t it?”

The air suddenly felt thick around Loki as he maintained defiant eye contact, schooling every muscle into a ‘casual’ motion of pushing his hands into his pocket to cover the uncomfortable shift of his weight where he stood.

Tony paused before bringing down the hammer in a coldly calm voice, “You’re a spy, aren’t you?”

The world shattered.

Hearing it spoken aloud was something Loki had not apparently prepared enough for as a physical sickness landed his gut. Everything he had done to keep his head above water for these six years, no, his whole career, was for naught as it seemed his end would come from the one man that had lit a tiny spark of hope that there might be a way out. He had come so close...

He held Tony’s gaze for a second longer before his resolve cracked and he looked to the floor.

That was apparently enough of an answer for Tony who scoffed, “You know, I knew something was up Loki. The late night ‘meetings’, the secrecy about what you do. Jesus I can’t believe I was naïve enough to think you needed help.”

Loki forced himself to remain silent and decided not to address the comment. What was the point?

“Did Odin send you?”

“No,” Loki answered flatly, honestly.

“Then who?” Tony asked, that cold tone in his voice wavering ever so slightly.

Loki shook his head. Despite everything, he could still protect Tony from himself. Tony was not the kind of person to take this slight lightly and if he went after Thanos after this, then he could be ruined all the same.

After a second of silence, Tony exhaled forcefully and paced for a second, before coming to a stop again, “I want to hear it from you.”

Loki frowned and looked back to him, “Hear what?”

“The truth,” Tony snapped, loudly, “About you. Who are you? Why are you here?” he paused then continued, “What have you taken from me?”

Loki took a breath,, “Those are exceptionally complicated questions, Tony. More than you know.”

“Ok, let’s break it down then shall we? Since it’s so hard for you,” Tony made no effort to conceal the bitterness in his voice, “What was it that you did at Asgard?”

Why was he doing this? The man already knew. He had it there in black and white. What was the point of having him say it? All it would do is cement that pain that Tony was trying and failing to hide. It would be held in a memory of Loki’s own voice.

“Answer me Loki!” Tony yelled suddenly.

The force in Tony’s voice made him flinch and screw his eyes shut. He’d yet to see Tony angry in their time together. He was used to anger, even violence if it came to that. He'd seen both many times before on previous projects whom he’d had the displeasure of having to be with in the final act of the scheme. But this time was different. This time as he opened his eyes and finally met Tony’s gaze again and saw the raw pain in his eyes. It hurt to see it there, because of him.

Loki opened his mouth to speak but froze as he realized he had no words. For the first time in his life he was speechless. He closed his mouth again and scrambled for something, anything to say. After a moment, he conceded to the voice longing for relief from the burden laying on his shoulders. It seemed that despite that tiny flicker of hope, this was his only way out after all. Quite frankly, it couldn’t come at the hands of a more deserving man.

“I was a saboteur,” Loki started, attempting futilely to keep his voice steady and strong. He couldn’t bear to see what his effect his admission would have on Tony so he dropped his gaze to the pieces of paper in his hand. His undoing. “When Odin came across a rival that he did not think he could outcompete conventionally, I would be sent to parley. But it was always a lie,” he paused and licked his lips nervously, “At best, I would spend time sowing seeds of dissent, or mishandling information in order to hinder their work. At worst...well at worst, I would take it.”

He had wanted to say it with a shrug, as if it meant nothing to him, but his body didn’t respond. His shoulders remained slumped, where they deserved to be. After a moment of anxious silence, Loki dared to lifted his eyes to meet Tony’s.

Tony was staring at him, brow furrowed slightly. There was no surprise there, merely the mixture of anger, and sadness that naturally came as an admission of betrayal wiped any doubt left in Tony’s mind.

"Why did you come to New York?” he asked.

Loki couldn’t help the breathy chuckle that came at the question. If one thing would come out of this, it’s that he would at least expose what Odin had done to him.

“It’s funny how Odin neglected to mention this part. I didn't come to New York,” Loki started not bothering to hide the spite in his words, “I was sent to New York. There was some prize here that Odin coveted. In truth, I don’t remember what it was, and I no longer care to try. What I do remember is knowing from the beginning that I would not be successful. But when I brought my concerns to Odin, he did not care to hear them,” he paused trying to swallow away the lump in his throat but it was stuck fast, “I went to Thor before I left. I had no one else but he couldn’t have known what was happening.” He lifted his gaze to look out over the city he hated. “I arrived and I lasted less than two months before they found out who I was and what I was doing. But when they threw the accusations at Odin’s feet...Odin denied them, denied knowledge of my actions. I was alone.”

He only now realized his fists were clenched in his pockets, but did nothing to unclench them.

When he finally looked back to Tony, the man was stoic and unreadable. “Funny, I thought the prison sentence would be more than six years.”

“It likely will,” Loki replied quietly. His heartbeat had slowed somewhat as the adrenaline that had first attempted to fuel fight or flight wilted and resignation filled its place. “But at the time, there was no trial, no indictment. They offered me a deal.”

“They hired you?” Tony snorted, “So you were happy to just carry on business as usual hopping from one place to another just snatching up whatever you’re told to as long as you don’t have to face up to what you’ve done?”

That struck a nerve. This was the part he had not been looking forward to. The array of false assumptions and beliefs about him and his character, because of what he was being forced to do, “It’s not that simple Tony.”

Tony threw his hands up in exasperation, “Yeah well how about you explain?! Enlighten me Loki, because quite frankly I am struggling here.”

Loki turned his head and narrowed his eyes at Tony, his mouth dropping open a little. How dare he?

“What? You’re struggling?” he asked disbelievingly, “You have no idea about me and my life. You’ve been sent a four-page report of a man that existed six years ago and you assume that you’ve got it all figured out. You suddenly presume to understand everything.” He spat the words at Tony as the last dying part of his resolve arrived to go down swinging. “There is so much going on here that you have no understanding of.” A new sickness crept across his stomach as the weight of what all this meant began to lay on his shoulders. Spite began to lace every word he spoke, “Had you listened to the one request I made of you, this would never have come to pass. If you had just left well enough alone I could have-”

Tony cut him off with a wave of one hand and started speaking, “Could’ve what? Carried on lying to me? Acting like whatever this was wasn’t just some figment of my imagination?! I cared about you, Loki!!” Tony paused and swallowed. His eyes were wide, glistening, “Just how long were you planning on lying to me?! A few weeks? Months? Years?!” his voice was raising in volume until he was shouting, “In a decade would you still be pretending to give a shit about me all the while selling my company out from under me? Jesus Loki you are something else.”

He’d had insults his whole life. He knew he was. He had come to terms with a long time ago. But to hear it from Tony? It broke something in him.

“You think I don’t know what I am?!” Loki yelled back furiously. The force of it made Tony sway backwards and surprise flicker momentarily over his features before they hardened once again. Loki watched him as his wave of fury suddenly receded to something much more bitter. This was the man who had made him hope for something more. The man that a part of him had hoped, begged, to be able to understand his need for redemption, now stood bringing everything down around him. “I am a monster and coward subsisting on scraps and stolen words so that I can survive another day. And I hate myself for it! Do you think my life is a kindness?”

“You seem to be doing alright for yourself,” Tony gestured wildly at the room around them.

Loki laughed, a little madly, “This? This is not mine,” he pulled at the top he was wearing, “This is not mine. The car below is not mine. Nothing. Here. Is. Mine. Everything here is at the gracious whim of my captor who could take it from me at less than a moment’s notice.”

“Well then why are you still here?” Tony snapped back, “It’s not like you’ve got anything weighing you down. If your life is so fucking awful, why do you stick around?!”

“And where do you suggest I flee to Tony?” Loki threw his arms out to the side, “There is no one in this god forsaken country who thinks of me as anymore than a rat on the street. My home is a thousand miles from here. Do you think if I could simply buy a plane ticket I would have by now?” he shook his head, a deep sadness joining the maelstrom of emotions rolling in his gut, “Even if I could, do you think Odin would welcome me back with open arms? He has cast me out once, I’m sure he would not be so troubled as to do it again. So please, Tony if you know of anywhere I could go then pray tell me. I've been searching for six years.”

“Boo hoo big shot,” Tony was steadfast as he spoke, “Maybe people would like you a bit better if you weren’t lying through your teeth at every word. Just how many lives have you ruined? Hm?”

Loki’s eyes narrowed and he met Tony’s gaze defiantly. A response snapped to his tongue from that dark part of his mind that was still trying to defend himself and he replied before could truly realize the impact of his words, “I couldn’t possibly to compare to a man who wrote his own name on weapons of war.”

The comment had as much of an effect as Loki suspected it might.

Tony immediately froze. His brow twitched as his mouth flattened into a narrow, grim line, though his eyes remained wide. Loki immediately wished he could take it back. Tony was the one to break eye contact this time and his gaze dropped to the floor where he stared at it silently.

“Wow...ok,” the man rubbed a hand over his head and sniffed, “Well that settles that then.”

Loki regretted it instantly. He was furious with himself. He had known what that would do to Tony. To bring up his history now, as just a weapon to use as one last parting cut just because he had lost. It was sickening how easily he’d turned the one weakness Loki knew back on him when the man had confided so much already. He swallowed, “Tony, I’m sorry, I-“

“Don’t be,” Tony replied, the eerie calm in his voice made Loki stop in his tracks. He glanced up at Loki and gave a flickering half smile that held no affection or humor. “I'm running full diagnostic of Stark Tower and its ancillaries. If there is anything amiss, I'll know by the end of the day.”

“You won’t find anything...” Loki said meekly.

Tony scoffed, “Confident little thief aren’t you?”

Loki’s lips hitched ever so slightly, “No. I am simply a former one.”

Tony exhaled forcefully and stalked past him to pull open the front door of Loki’s apartment. He paused in the doorway and asked over his shoulder, “Just how much of you is a lie?”

“Does it matter anymore?”

“No...I suppose it doesn’t."

The door slammed shut behind him, taking the best chance Loki had ever had for getting out of this. And worse than that, Tony had been his only reason to.


	14. Chapter 14

The music was loud, blasting through the speakers of the workshop in some vain attempt to drown out the thoughts in Tony's head. 

He’d retreated down to the workshop basically as soon as he’d returned from Loki’s apartment, not a word to Steve or Pepper or anyone else for that matter, and he’d been down here ever since. It was a coping mechanism he was admittedly supposed to be weaning himself out of but desperate times and all that...

Tony couldn’t decide who he was angrier at. Loki for being the rat bastard that he apparently was, or himself for being stupid enough to be suckered into by the whole act. How had he been dumb enough to fall for that whole damsel in distress act he had pulled? Jesus was that was he’d become? 

With a grunt, Tony hefted the sledgehammer and gave another swing at the concrete.

It had become quite clear not long after his descent down here that he was not in a fit state for delicate electro-engineering and so he’d decided to pick up a bit of an impromptu side project. As a part of his research into his dad’s new element, he’d realised the only way to create it was through the use of a particle accelerator, something which he was not in possession of. Yet. 

It was probably something that should be built by professionals with a more precise methodology than just pent up frustration and a sledge hammer, but hey, how hard could it be? Besides, taking a sledge hammer to a concrete wall to make space for it was turning out to be pretty cathartic. 

He wasn’t sure how long he’d been down here. Without any windows or clocks there was no way of telling the time. Tony knew it had been more than a day. Jarvis had chimed in with his programmed warning of shut down a while ago. Not that Tony had been in the mood for that. Rather than conceding and ascending the stairs to his penthouse and most likely his bed for another night of nightmares, Tony had opted to simply deactivate those protocols. It was simple really. Although Jarvis had protested wildly, Tony had enjoyed largely uninterrupted music ever since. 

A deep tiredness burned behind his eyes and he let the head of the sledge hammer rest on the floor of the workshop a moment as he rubbed them with the finger and thumb of one hand, breathing heavily. The ache of his muscles began almost as soon as he stopped moving. But he knew what would happen if he stopped now, if he slept now. 

The nightmares were always worse when he was stressed. Always had been. The last thing he wanted to do now was go to sleep with Loki on his mind and no matter what he did, the shitbag just wouldn’t leave his thoughts. That smarmy grin when he’d sniped some comment, that rare soft smile when he seemed actually happy. The comforting weight of his arm across Tony’s chest as they had slept on the sofa. The rage on his face as he admitted what he was. The pain.

Tony screwed his eyes shut and shook his head quickly, ridding himself of that last thought. It had been an act. All of it. He was a liar, a career thief. And Tony had been stupid enough to fall for that caring bullshit.

He felt an ache in his jaw as he grit his teeth and swung the hammer at the wall once more, watching with satisfaction as the hole he’d made to the other side grew, chips of concrete crumbling to the floor. 

The music quieted suddenly and Jarvis spoke, “Sir, Mr Rogers and Ms Potts are awaiting you in the penthouse for your weekly briefing.”

Tony scowled, “It’s Monday?” he asked between breaths. 

“Yes sir,” Jarvis replied. For an AI with a deliberately neutral voice, he sounded irritated, “You have been down here for almost 72 hours.”

“Huh...” Tony mused, leaning back to inspect the small hole in the wall, “I’d have thought it would be bigger by now.”

“Might I suggest a break, you may find your work hindered by exhaustion,” Jarvis input, helpfully. 

“Can’t stop now, Jarvis, I'm almost there,” Tony lifted the weight of the sledge hammer once more. 

“Then I presume you are happy for me to explain to Mr Rogers and Ms Potts why it is that you won’t be attending the meeting?” 

Tony paused with the sledge hammer in the air, “You wouldn’t...”

“It is not a problem sir, I am more than happy to explain.”

Tony huffed and let the hammer drop to the ground, “You’re getting spiteful in your old age, you know that.”

“I shall inform them you are on your way.”

“Yeah yeah,” Tony muttered as he stepped over the hammer to the stairs. 

The sudden quiet as he stepped out of his rock music echo chamber left a quiet ringing in his ears and stepping out from the bright white lights and into the natural sunlight of morning had more of an exhaustive effect on him than he anticipated. 

His PAs were sat where they always were, chatting idly, but they broke off suddenly and turned towards him when Tony let the door to the workshop fall closed behind him. The look on their faces made Tony suddenly acutely aware of the state he must be in, having spent three days in perpetual light, hammering at a concrete wall with no showers or change of clothes. 

“Tony...” Pepper breathed once she’d regained her composure, painting a smile on her face and attempting to continue on brightly, “You’re up early this morning!”

Tony crossed to the sofas and snatched up the pastry that was waiting for him as it always was. It was only when he’d scoffed it down in two bites that he realized how hungry he was. To be expected really, since he’d not eaten properly in nearly three days. 

“I’m busy can we make this quick,” Tony said waving one hand in the air in a circular motion as he slumped into one of the armchairs. 

There was a second of hesitant silence before Steve leant forward a little, “Is everything ok Tony?”

Tony shrugged immediately, “Sure, great. Why wouldn’t it be? Like I said I am busy so come on what we got?”

“Busy with what?” Pepper asked uncertainly. 

“I’m building a particle accelerator,” Tony answered, wiggling his eyebrows with a grin, “Exciting stuff really. I am having to remodel the workshop a little but I’ve presumed that you know since it’s my building I can do what I want with it so...”

“A particle accelerator, like at CERN?” Steve looked understandably confused. 

Tony scratched the top of his head, “In principle but mine is smaller, better.”

Another beat of silence passed before Pepper leant out and rested a hand on his arm, “Have you slept, Tony?” 

“...Sure.”

“Jarvis, how much sleep has Tony had?” Pepper asked, not taking her hand off his arm. 

At the question, Tony groaned, covered his face in one hand and sank a little lower into the chair. 

“Tony has had a total of 46 minutes sleep since Friday,” Jarvis answered helpfully as Tony continued to consider further amendments to Jarvis’s current protocols. 

The demeanor of his PAs changed immediately. Their smiles fell away, replaced with that irritatingly familiar stern but concerned expression they were both so good at. Well, no. Steve was good at it. Pepper usually took a minute to pull it off properly. 

That hand on his arm lifted and smacked him lightly in the bicep. 

“Ow!” Tony pulled his arm away and stared at her.

“Since Friday Tony?!” she snapped. 

“I’ve been busy, Pepper!” Tony protested.

“You’ve gotten so busy since Friday?” she replied disbelievingly. 

“Did something happen on Thursday when you went for drinks?” Steve asked, calmly. He was always the one who managed to hit the nail on the head annoyingly fast. 

“No! I’m fine!” Tony rubbed his hands over his face doing his best to bite back that tiredness but it was only getting worse now he was sitting down. 

But Steve persisted, “Something happened with Loki didn’t it?”

Tony held a hand up immediately, “I don’t want to talk about it, ok?”

“Fights are normal Tony, it’s ok.”

“Nope,” Tony stood and began to walk back to his workshop. He was not having this conversation with them. As much as it pained him to admit, it hurt. But it wasn’t his bruised ego that he’d been tricked, or even that he’d been targeted in the first place. The worst part was that he was going to miss that man he thought he’d known as Loki. And he was not about to talk about that with these two. Not here. Not now. Maybe not ever. Even his therapist would have to wait a while for this. 

“Where are you going?!” Steve called after him, “We should talk about this!”

“No we shouldn’t!” Tony replied over his shoulder, “Nice to see you guys. Same time next week? Ok great.”

Tony had just reached the top of his stairs when Jarvis chimed in once again, “Sir, Mr Laufeyson is downstairs requesting access to the penthouse.”

Something twisted in his gut and Tony froze. Why was he here? Had he not done enough? “I’m afraid I don’t know anyone by that name.”

“Let him up Jarvis,” Steve said quietly. 

Tony whirled in place and stared at him across the room, “What the hell do you think you’re doing?”

“Look, clearly something has happened between you two

, and he wouldn’t be here if he didn’t want to sort things out,” Steve offered a smile but Tony wasn’t for responding. 

“You don’t understand Rogers,” Tony snapped. 

Steve just shrugged and stood up from the sofa, Pepper stood along with him as if on some unspoken cue, ”No but I don’t think you’re about to explain it to me and if the alternative is that you sink back down there for another three days, then surely this is better than nothing.”

The lift arrived with a quiet bing and the doors slid open. 

The man who stepped out was not what Tony remembered him as. It was certainly Loki but the man looked as bad as Tony felt. Dark circles ringed his eyes, his hair was lank, falling in waves to his shoulders and his skin looked paler than usual. He saw Tony and offered a small smile which flickered and died as he spotted Steve and Pepper. 

“Oh, I’m sorry, I’m interrupting,” Loki said quietly, turning back to the lift, “I’ll go...”

Steve held up a hand to stop him, “No no, we were just heading out anyway. We’ll see you soon Tony,” he flashed a toothy smile over his shoulder at Tony, ignoring the daggers that Tony was attempting to throw his way with looks alone. 

With that, the two PAs stepped into the lift that Loki had disembarked and suddenly it was just the two of them. A tense silence stretched out between them as Tony tried to work out what to do. His thoughts were thrown in a frenzy. He hadn’t expected to see Loki again, ever. Now that he’d been found out, he expected the man to simply slink away and disappear, ready to start again on some new target elsewhere. There was no logical reason for him to turn up here. Tony could have him arrested at any second. 

It was Loki that eventually broke the silence. He cleared his throat, sounding almost nervous as he started, “Thank you for seei-”

Tony cut him off quickly with a wave of one hand, “What? What do you want?”

Loki opened his mouth to reply but struggled to find words. 

“What, snake got your tongue? C’mon spit it out,” Tony snapped. Despite everything, he couldn’t help but need an answer to that question. He’d hear that answer then Loki would be out of here. At least that’s what he told himself. “Did you come sniffing around for one last tidbit to take back to your boss?” Tony dug around in the pocket of his jeans until he found a scrunched-up piece of note paper and threw it at him, “That’s some super-duper equations if that’s what you’re after.”

Loki didn’t move and watched the balled-up paper bounce of his shoulder and land at his feet. He took a breath and looked back to Tony, “I understand your hatred of me, Tony. Truly I do, but-”

Tony cut him off again, “Oh you understand, do you?” he snapped, narrowing his eyes at the man, “You understand what it’s like to care about someone, to trust someone, to think that perhaps you’ve found someone who could tolerate you, only to find out it’s all a lie.  _And_  a lie to steal from me?”

Loki licked his lips and shook his head, not rising to meet Tony’s emotional level as he had done previously. He was a lot calmer than the last time they had spoken. There was an air of resignation about him that Tony had never seen before, “I have not stolen anything from you Tony,” he stated, “You must know that already or else I suspect I would already have been arrested.”

Fair point, Tony conceded silently, “Well it was only a matter of time wasn’t it?”

“No, actually, it wasn’t,” Loki replied. Was that a hint of pride in his voice?

Tony rolled his eyes and sighed, “You have no idea how unbelievably done I am with your cryptic BS Loki. Just...get out,” he wafted a hand at the lift and turned to head back to the workshop. He wasn’t about to stand here and listen to this. What was the point?

“Tony wait.”

Despite himself, Tony paused with one foot on the stairs down to the workshop. Somewhere behind him, he heard something slap down onto the coffee table. 

“I came here to explain myself to you. But it is clear that you do not care to listen to me. So read it yourself, it is all here.”

Tony allowed himself to turn to see what Loki was talking about. On the coffee table was an A4 manila folder with a number of papers inside it. On the front, a familiar photo of himself grinned. A frown creased his forehead and took a couple of steps towards the table, “What’s that?”

Loki was stood over the table, regarding the folder with an odd expression, “That is all the information I have on you.”

An irresistible curiosity piqued in Tony. He glanced between the folder and Loki, trying to work out what kind of trap this was. What Loki was trying to pull with this? Was he hoping that Tony would read through a bunch of half-truths and correct them, giving him all the information he needed? Still, it couldn’t hurt to know what exactly had been compromised. Silently, Tony strode to the table and snatched up the folder. Loki didn’t move, waiting patiently as Tony flipped through the pages in the folder. 

At first glance it was a fairly comprehensive summary of Stark industries. Its board members, its leaders, even some of the more secret projects they were working on. At its back there was a four-page summary of Tony himself, starting from when he first took over from his father, right through to the present. Tony skim read it, skipped quickly past the part that summarized Afghanistan. It was one of the more accurate accounts of his life and he’d seen a few in his time. But what struck him more than he was expecting was seeing the little notes in Loki’s handwriting scribbled around the page. 

“So what, this is your game plan?” Tony asked once he’d read enough.

Loki was looking at the folder as he replied, “It might have been one day.”

Tony scowled, ”What does that even mean? Why are you giving this to me? Oddly enough, I already know my own history, why do I need it from you?”

Loki finally lifted his gaze from the folder to meet Tony’s, ”Because, I don’t want it anymore. I have quit.”

“You quit...” the three words seemed exceptionally hard for Loki to say out loud. There was even a moment Tony could see him force his chin up, “Why?”

A confused frown flickered across Loki’s face, “You’re questioning my motives? I seem to recall not three days ago you couldn’t fathom any reason why I had not already.”

Tony wafted a hand, “No, I’m not asking why you quit. It just seems a little convenient that just after you’re found out you turn up here with a folder of very google-able facts claiming you’ve suddenly seen the light and it’s all over,” Tony narrowed his eyes, searching Loki’s face for his reaction, but the confused frown seemed to endure, ”Kinda like a last ditch gamble at my trust, you know, hand over ‘what you’ve got’ to convince me let you hang around.”

Loki’s frown deepened a little and he looked to the ground, “I have no expectation that I will be staying Tony.”

“Then why now? Why not the last guy or the guy before that? Why stop at me?”

Loki was quiet. The question seemed to have caught him off guard a little and he had no answer prepared. He opened his mouth to start then closed it and shook his head slightly. Tony didn’t push him for an answer like he had previously. He didn’t have the energy for another shouting match and he suspected that Loki didn’t either. It wasn’t long before Loki found his conclusion and looked back to Tony. 

“It’s not a coincidence that I quit now Tony. It's because of you. And not simply because it was you who caught me,” Loki’s opening statement struck an unusual chord in Tony’s chest but he didn’t interrupt, “As long as I can remember I have lived a half-life. The very nature of my work meaning that I cannot simply exist as Loki Laufeyson. I could never simply share drinks with my brother and a partner on a Thursday night, for example, without copious amounts of research and constant vigilance. There was always a project to complete, or a completed one to avoid. If anyone was to find out who I was then...” he trailed off then chuckled sadly, "Well I would be where I am now.”

He paused for a second and Tony remained silent also. Conflict raged in his mind, trying to find some shred of evidence that Loki was lying. He was trying to tell himself that this was just another sob story designed to pull Tony back into his grasp. 

After a moment Loki continued, “When we met for the first time in that bar, you subverted any and all expectations I have for how I deserve to be treated. Although at the time you did not me, and I did not know you, you still helped me. You saw a sad, pathetic man, and you took him home.”

“What do you mean you didn’t know who I was? Some crappy spy you are.”

The softest hint of a smile played at Loki’s lips but it didn’t last long, “I was only given that folder the next day. The night in the bar was not supposed to have happened and as far as my employers know, it hasn’t. You were never supposed to see that part of me. You were never supposed to know my real name. After I was given you as a target, I attempted to create a personality that I believed you would be attracted to, one that you would accept and trust. And I don’t know where I went wrong but you continued to subvert me throughout our time together. Each mask I put on you somehow pulled away and insisted on looking underneath,” he took a deep breath and frowned to himself as though still not entirely sure he understood what he was saying, “Yet, at each glimpse of me, the true me, you didn’t turn away. It seemed as though you liked what you saw under that mask. It made me realize that if I truly wanted to be something better, to be the man that you didn’t turn away from, I needed to get out of where I am now.”

When Loki finished this time, it was with a note of finality that expected a reply. But Tony wasn’t sure he had one to give. And so he did what he always did in this uncomfortable moments, he quipped, “How sentimental.”

A ghost of that usual Loki smirk appeared for a second, “I’m having a relatively rare moment of emotional clarity, and I’d thank you not to make light of it.”

Tony swallowed and scratched the back of his head. If this was an act, it was a damn good one. ”I still don’t see why you’re telling me any of this.”

The smirk faded, “I had thought perhaps that it may alleviate some of the bitter taste of my true nature to know that you stopped me.”

“This is an unusual play Loki, I’ll give you that.”

Loki sighed tiredly and stuffed his hands into his pockets, “There is no play. There is no ploy, no plot, no plan. In truth I am exhausted with all of them.”

Tony waved the folder in the air, raising an eyebrow, “You expect me to just believe that? You turn up here with what is basically a collection of Wikipedia articles and some sob story about how I made you see something better or some shit and you just expect me to forget everything I already know about you?”

Loki barely reacted, his features remaining set, ”I don’t presume to deserve anything from you Tony. But if you feel it would help you to have further proof,” he pulled one hand out of his pocket and tossed a key onto the table between them, “That is the key to the apartment I used to live in. It is the only one I have. Feel free to search it to your heart’s content. I would rather it was you than them.”

Tony frowned at him, "Wait, used to?”

Something else seemed to occur to him and he pulled his cellphone from his back pocket and held it out, “I assume you can pull just as much information from this also. I just ask that the GPS tracker remains on if at all possible.”

Tony didn’t move to take it. He didn’t like being handed things at the best of times, let alone a cellphone that he had never known Loki to be without. Why was he just handing it over? “Why?”

“Because I am fairly certain they follow my location and so if they believe me to be here, it will be safer for both of us,” Loki lowered the phone onto the table. 

“What the hell does that mean Loki?” Tony asked exasperated, “Where will you actually be?”

There was a faulter in Loki’s otherwise stoic facade and had Tony not been on edge, he might not have caught it, ”I don’t know yet. I’m taking your advice and I’m just going.”

The news struck Tony a little harder than he would have liked. Since Friday, he would have been content to have never seen Loki again, but since he’d turned up here looking as tired and done as Tony felt, the anger he felt towards him had waned. With that receding, all that was left was that sadness, and the embarrassing fact that he knew he would miss the man he had known as Loki. Although, as much as he tried to deny it, he was starting to believe that perhaps not everything had been the act he had once thought.

“It is likely that my employers won’t take too kindly to finding out that I have failed, much less that I have been compromised,” Loki continued. His voice was strong but he had dropped his gaze away and Tony knew him well enough now to see that flicker of fear in his features, ”I checked in with them yesterday, reporting as usual and I don’t think they suspect anything as of yet. Perhaps if I can enough of a head start, I will be able to buy myself enough time to figure out a solution.”

“This is one hell of a bluff Loki,” Tony muttered, dropping the folder onto the coffee table.

Loki raised his gaze, “Quite frankly Tony, it does not alter my odds to have your confidence or not any longer. I would have had to leave in two months anyway, this is simply more complicated.”

“What happens in two months?”

Loki shrugged, “Nothing now, I suppose. But I was originally given three months in which to complete the job. I had hoped to bide my time and take my leave then, but alas,” he smiled sadly, ”You beat me in my game.”

Tony rubbed the side of his face with one hand, “You could have told me this Loki. I asked you basically day one if you in any shit. If you needed help.”

“And what you have done if I had told you then, having known me for three days?” Loki regarded him thoughtfully, “Would you have told me, were our positions switched?”

Tony sniffed and ran hand through his hair. God damn it. ”What am I supposed to tell Thor? Even if I pretended like we’d just broken up, he’d still want to see you.”

“I would actually prefer that you say nothing to Thor,” Loki said, that familiar sadness now open on his face, “I’m sure he would not be surprised at my leaving again.”

Tony frowned for a moment before something clicked, “He doesn’t know...”

“Thor doesn’t know,” Loki confirmed with a nod of his head, “And I would prefer to keep it that way if at all possible...” he trailed off then chuckled as something occurred to him, “You know, I think that you likely know me better than anyone on this planet.”

Tony didn’t have a response. Up until Friday morning, Tony had only seen a flicker of the person that Loki truly was, glimpsed through cracks in a fractured armor, but it was enough to make Tony want to know him. Even help him if he could. But the report that Odin had sent had burned that image back to nothing but a coiled snake hiding behind that mask. 

But now, Loki was stood before him with nothing. There was no evasion, no denials, no excuses. He was a man giving up everything to go on the run from his past so that he might build a new one. 

Now that his haze of anger was beginning to clear, Tony was hard pressed to find anything that Loki had lied about. Thor had corroborated his story of his past, Odin had backed up the story that he had sent him to New York. Loki himself had always been open about how much he hated his work, from day one. Maybe he was telling the truth? 

The thought process had taken only a second, during which Loki had looked away, out over the city, apparently lost in his own thoughts, but he returned his attention when Tony started to speak. It was not hard to see the slight glisten in his eyes before he blinked it away quickly, 

“Look, I can’t believe I’m going to say this but let’s say I believe you – which I’m not saying that I do – but hypothetically I do, and hypothetically you didn’t leave right away. What happens then?”

There was a note of suspicion in Loki’s voice as he spoke, “Tony I appreciate the offer but I-”

“Wasn’t an offer it was a hypothetical,” Tony pointed out quickly. 

“Well I suppose...hypothetically, I could return to my original two-month timescale.”

“So you’d leave either way,” Tony concluded, “And what if, hypothetically, I helped you with your employment issues.”

Loki pulled one hand from his pocket and held it up, “That isn’t even a hypothetical option Tony.”

“And why not?”

“Because I won’t have you more involved than you already are,” Loki said simply, “If they found out you were helping me get out, then they would ruin you all the same.”

Tony scoffed, “I don’t know about ruin me.”

“I do appreciate the offer Tony, but it’s not worth the risk to you, or to Stark Industries,” Loki said with an exceptionally serious tone.

“Who are they?” Tony asked simply. 

Loki shook his head, “I’m not going to tell you that Tony,” he took a deep breath and looked out over the city again before saying, “I should go. Thank you for seeing me Tony, and for everything else.”

Loki turned and began to walk back towards the elevator without another word. Tony stood frozen, watching almost in slow motion. He still had no way of knowing for sure whether this was just another play or not. It was clear that Loki was a good actor, that much was obvious. But was he really going to gamble the key to his apartment and his cellphone on this? More importantly, what if this was the truth, and Tony was just going to let him walk out there to face it alone? 

Now or never Tony. 

“Wait!”

Loki stopped just before the lift door and turned back to him, eyebrow raised.

Tony took a quick breath, “This is going to bite me in the ass, I just know it, but...stay.”

A look of genuine confusion fell on his face, ”What?”

Tony rolled his eyes. It was enough to say it the first time, and he was going to have to say it again, “I said, stay. Do I have to say it three times like you’re one of the fairy lords?”

Loki closed his eyes and sighed in barely concealed exasperation, “It was not a question of volume, but one of comprehension. Why would you possibly want me to stay, after everything I’ve done?”

“Well, objectively, you’ve not done a whole bunch,” Tony replied, taking a tentative step towards him, “There’s nothing amiss in the systems, anywhere. I tripled checked, so either you’re telling the truth or you’re just not great at your job,” Tony couldn’t help but give a half-smile as Loki quickly covered a look of amusement, “Either way, I don’t think I've got too much to worry about if you did hang around.”

The look of amusement faded and Loki shook his head again, ”You can’t know how dangerous it would be for you Tony. If they find out...”

Tony took another step closer and held up his hands, “Babe, I’m a big boy. I’ve survived a lot more than a little underhanded competition.”

“You don’t understand...” Loki said quietly.

“Then you’ve got two months to explain, haven’t you?” Tony offered a grin as he closed the remaining distance between them and placed himself between Loki and the lift, “Besides, I’m concerned what Thor will do with that hammer if he finds out I lost you again.”

Loki regarded him, conflict writ on his features before he looked to the floor, “I don't deserve your sanctuary Tony.”

“Hey,” Tony started sternly to get the man’s attention and when Loki finally met his gaze, he reached out and took one of Loki’s hands in his, “Put it this way, if my options are two months or nothing at all?  Call it selfish but I want the two months.”

Loki’s mouth dropped open a little, his forehead was creased and that glisten had returned to his eyes. He was a good actor, but not this good. Tony squeezed his hand and after an uncertain second, Loki closed his eyes and bowed his head. 

“Tony, I...I don’t know what to say.”

“Good I’m not finished,” Tony continued quickly, “You’ll be under strict rules while you’re here. Because you’ve got to understand I can’t exactly trust you right off the bat.”

Loki raised his head and listened quietly.

Tony held up a finger on his free hand, “Number one. You cannot lie to me ever again. About anything. If you won’t tell me who you work for then fine whatever, I’ll allow it. I'm sure I’ll work it out eventually,” he held up second finger, “Number two. You cannot be here unsupervised. Either me or Thor will be with you whenever or wherever you are in the building,” he held up a third finger, “And third and finally, you will tell me everything about how it is you operate, how you report, how you’re monitored, etc.”

Loki had nodded along to the first two, but frowned at the third, “Why?”

“Well you’re going to have to play along until your departure date, aren’t you? If you’re not going to let me fight them head on, at least let me help you ‘report’ on me while you’re here.”

Loki considered for a moment then narrowed his eyes slightly and asked, “Why do you even want to help me Tony?”

Tony exhaled forcefully, “Because if even an ounce of what you’re saying is true, then I’m not going to leave you in it alone.”

Loki swallowed, “...You’re a better man than I could ever have expected Tony.”

“Well obviously,” he quipped as he stepped away from the elevator now that he was fairly confident that Loki wasn’t a flight risk. He let go of Loki’s hand as he headed back to the table where the folder was, “Oh and for the record, I actually spent a long time making sure weapons with my name on have been destroyed.”

Loki trailed behind, “Tony, I don’t know how I can make up for that comment. It was cruel and unnecessary and-”

Tony waved him off, “If I took every comment about the old me to heart, there wouldn’t be a whole lot of it left and then where would you be?” he raised his eyebrows at Loki and smirked, “Will you come and sit down, you look like a kicked puppy. You want a coffee? We’re going to be here a while,” he set up two cups under his coffee machine without waiting for an answer, “Jarvis will you erase the last half hour of audio and visual, I'll sort out some looped footage later. Oh and give us a dark zone for another hour or so, maybe longer, we’ll see.” 

“Perhaps some food while you are taking a break from work sir?” Jarvis suggested, ”It has been nearly three days since your last meal.”

“Did he just say three days?” Loki asked from the sofas. 

“I’ve been busy, alright?” Tony protested as he carried the two cups back to the sofas and held one out to Loki. 

Loki just raised an eyebrow at him as he took the drink, “Jarvis can you place food orders?”

“Hey, don’t take liberties with him. You’re not exactly off the hook yet.”

“Acknowledged but if you’re planning on starving yourself in the next few days I’d rather just leave now,” Loki replied easily.

Tony found it hard to be irritated as that familiar Loki smirk returned fully to the man’s face, “Duly noted. Ok Jarvis, you get food, we’ve got coffee,” he pointed at Loki as he took a seat beside him, “All’s that’s left now is for you to tell me everything.”

And after a deep breath, Loki did. 


	15. Chapter 15

It had not been a part of Loki's plan to come here to Stark Tower.

As Tony had slammed the door behind him just a few days ago, the true weight of what had just happened did not take long to fully settle on his shoulders. He had known he surely didn’t have long before the police would arrive at Tony’s behest. And so the moment Tony was out of sight, he had scrambled to pull together some meagre belongings, stuffing them haphazardly into a duffel bag he had stored away from his first arrival here. It had taken a couple of hours for logic to beat its way through his panic, forcing him to stop, take stock, and just think.

He couldn’t afford to risk leaving until he had reported to Thanos this week and besides that he’d barely gotten together any cash since his decision leave. His options were limited enough as it was without factoring in a lack of finances.

And so he had forced himself to wait, with baited breath, going out only once a day to withdraw cash, expecting to see squad cars awaiting him on his return. But for whatever reason, they never materialised, he did not dwell too much on why it was. And so Loki had pushed his luck, delaying the day of his reporting so he could gather just that little bit more money and try to figure out where he could go.

When the day of the reporting came, Loki knew he didn’t have enough to make an easy getaway but he was out of time. He had been able to pass off some lame update that involved Tony giving him a tour of the inner tower, which the man seemed to buy without much more than the usual amount of scorn.  
The instant the line disconnected, Loki had snatched the duffel bag from the floor and headed for the door.

He had almost made it, left the apartment, left this life, when something made him pause in the doorway. He couldn’t be sure whether it was merely a fear he had overlooked something or something more significant but it made him look back. And that's when he saw it. The file he’d brought out of the planning room and left on the side in the lounge. He couldn’t recall why he’d moved it in the first place, probably just caught up in his panicked whirlwind at some point.

But Tony’s grinning face was still clipped to its front, a stark contrast to the last time the two had spoken. Well, spoken was a tame word for their last exchange. Memories of the screaming match had flashed across Loki's mind and he sneered at himself. Was he really going to do that? Was he going to risk losing valuable time on going to him? The one who had broken the one promise he had made him and slashed Loki’s chances by more than half?

It was not a long internal debate.

Yes, he was going to ‘waste time’ on him. Because if not for Tony, the concept of escape would not have crossed his mind. Tony had been the only man who had shown him any form of kindness and the only thing he had asked in return was honesty. Something that Loki could not give. Could Loki really blame him for wanting to know his past?

It was the least that Loki could do to give him answers before leaving him in peace.

He had anticipated anger when he arrived. He had expected to have to fight his way up to the penthouse to speak to him or even having to simply ask a security guard to deliver a message in his stead as he was forcefully ejected from the building. But when Jarvis had allowed him up and Tony’s PAs had barely blinked an eyelid at his arrival, he did not really know how to react.  
He had also not anticipated seeing Tony in such a state when he had arrived, tired, dishevelled, stubble beginning to fill in the gaps in his usually cleanly cut beard. Had their argument really had that much of an impact? Yes of course it had, idiot, Loki chastised himself. To learn that the man you were beginning to form some sort of bond with was nothing but a lying snake sent to destroy your work, it could break a man. And he had known that Tony was still vulnerable.

When Tony had asked him stay and wait out his two months, Loki was shocked. Once again, this man had shown him a kindness he did not deserve and asked only honesty in return.

And so of course he gave it without question.

He had explained how the process of how he worked, starting from being given a target, how Loki would spend time assessing this situation before requesting the time of his employer. If that time was granted, well, then he was largely left to his own devices. Loki explained how the reporting system was usually implemented on longer projects such as Tony’s. He explained that he suspected that his phone GPS was tracked but he did not think he was physically followed but he couldn’t be sure of either. And finally, he explained that he didn’t know what his employer did with the information and did not want to.

Tony had sat in stoic, uncharacteristic silence as Loki had talked, listening intently as he ate the takeaway Chinese food Jarvis had ordered, interrupting only once to ask if Loki needed another coffee. It was early evening when Loki had finished and Tony had nodded his head slowly for a moment before slapping his hands to his thighs, declaring that this was too much to think about right now, and disappearing into his bathroom for a shower.

In the heat of the moment, Loki had not truly considered the implications of what he was doing. But now as he sat alone in Tony’s lounge, the potential outcomes began to dawn on him. What if this was all simply a ploy to keep him here while Tony arranged for his arrest? He had just confessed to everything, every detail, in a room constantly passively monitored by the most sophisticated AI that Loki had ever heard of. The police were likely already on their way.

Why did he not think about this? Why did he just not think when Tony was around? Everything sounded so reasonable when he spoke. That man had blurred so many lines that Loki could not see them anymore.

He sat forward in his seat, trying to control the nervous panic beginning to bubble up in his stomach and, began to gauge the distance between where he was and the lift door. Perhaps he could still make it before the authorities arrived.

“You alright Agent Bond?” Tony asked as he emerged from his bathroom, drawing Loki’s attention from the lift door, “Looking kinda pale there. Well, more pale, I guess.”

Loki dragged his gaze away from the lift to Tony, ready to retort only to falter as he saw him. He had swapped was no doubt a grimy tank top and sweatpants for an admittedly simple outfit that consisted only of one white towel wrapped around his waist that sat low on his hips, long enough that it almost brushed the floor, leaving his well-defined chest bare. Although it was unexpected enough to make Loki trip over his words, the elegance of his appearance was dimmed somewhat by the second, smaller towel he had draped over his head.

Loki recovered himself quickly and shook his head, tearing his eyes away and forcing them to the floor. He couldn’t afford for those lines to get any blurrier. “I think, perhaps, I should go.”

Tony had been scrubbing his hair under the towel as he crossed back to the sofas, but broke off as Loki spoke, “Go?” he asked, peering out from under the towel before pulling it from his head and discarding it over the arm of the sofa, “I thought we talked about this. Like go back to your apartment, or go go?”

Loki looked up at Tony who was standing watching him intently, “I appreciate your offer Tony, truly I do, but...” Loki trailed off and lowered his gaze again, fighting the impulse just to get up and go, “I learnt a long time ago, that if something sounds too good to be true, it likely is.”

A mix of hurt confusion flickered across Tony’s face, but when he didn’t respond, Loki continued.

“You have your answers as to who I am, Tony, and while I do not regret giving them to you, I am in danger as a result,” Loki stood as he spoke, no longer able to sit still, “As much as I despise who I am and what I’ve done, I would still like to survive long enough to perhaps get a chance to become something better and I can’t do that if I am arrested.”

The confusion on Tony’s face began to dissipate, replaced with slow realisation.

“And so, I understand that must do what you must, and if you have not already made the call, I would appreciate half a day. Enough time to get out of the city. It may help my chances,” Loki swallowed nervously, searching Tony’s face for any hint, any indication as to how much his request would be heard.

Tony was silent for a moment, then his eyebrows flicked up and he shook his head in mild disbelief, “Jeez, you’re as damaged as I am, aren’t you?” he muttered, almost to himself then reached up a scratched his eyebrow as he thought then presented his hands palm up in a gesture of peace, “Look, cards on the table? I don’t know if we can just go back to how things were a few days ago, last Thursday, whenever it was that we had the big spy reveal party. That doesn’t seem plausible after this whole thing,” he paused for breath briefly, lowering his hands but not breaking eye contact with Loki, “And I don’t even know if I’m properly processing it right now, sleep deprivation will do that to a guy, but I didn’t ask you to stay so I could get you to air out all your dirty laundry and have you arrested for it.” Tony said it as though it was obvious, as if the thought had been so ludicrous, he couldn’t understand where it had come from in the first place.

And as he spoke, Loki realized that he didn’t either.

Tony rubbed a hand over his face when Loki couldn’t find any words to respond with, “God I’m so tired. My arms hurt, like a lot. I need to exercise more. Or maybe just lay off the sledge hammer binge. Do you work out? You look like you work out. God, I probably don’t actually know anything about you, do I?”

Despite himself, the corner of Loki’s mouth had twitched up into a half-smile as he watched Tony speak, “You’re rambling Tony.”

Tony exhaled sharply, “Yeah, it happens. You’ll have to get used to it,” he paused and glanced away for less then a second then looked back to Loki and began again, talking slightly slower, “I’ll start over. Long story short, I believe you.” The words struck something deep down in Loki’s gut and he swallowed. “And I don’t know if I can trust you, but I’d certainly like to try.” Tony suddenly took on a very serious note and took a step to close the distance between the two of them, “I know it’s not quite the same, but I understand what it’s like not to feel safe anywhere...and it sucks. There's nothing I can do to help you directly if you won’t tell me who it is that is responsible for all this and if you need to go, then you can go. I'm not gonna stop you. But if there’s anything I can offer, it’s safety, for now. I want you to feel safe here. I want you to feel safe with me,” Tony paused for what Loki suspected was dramatic effect, “If that’s what you want.”

Loki was frozen. This had never been an option for him before. To be able to live in the shelter of someone who had the will and the power to protect him, even if it was temporary. But he wanted it, desperately. He wanted to be able to trust someone, to trust Tony. In those brief moments of calm in his life, he had looked back over the last few weeks of his life. They had been some of the best. And the only differing factor had been the man standing in front of him, holding open a door to sanctuary.

But what if it was all a trick?

Loki quashed that voice as soon as it muttered the thought into his mind. So what if this was a trick. He reminded himself of what he had thought before deciding to go for drinks with his brother and Tony just a few days earlier. If he could not do something simply because he wanted to without fear of betrayal, then what was the point of trying to leave at all?

Loki gave the lift one last lingering glance and then looked back to Tony, took a deep breath and said, “I think I would like to stay.”

Tony’s shoulders seemed to lower at least an inch and he grinned.  
*****

They did not stay up much longer. Having decided that neither of them had gotten enough sleep since their fight on Friday, or the Big Reveal as Tony had decided to refer to it, they collapsed onto Tony’s bed before the sun had set. Not that the sunlight mattered to Tony. His body clock had been well and truly ruined by his weekend in the workshop. He made a mental note to reset Jarvis’s protocols the next day and try and build in some failsafe against himself for the future. He had thought he was past that kind of thing, but it had not exactly been a usual set of circumstances. It apparently didn’t bother Loki either who paused only to remove the majority of his clothes, something that Tony made no effort to look away from, before crawling under the covers. He was asleep in moments.

If what Loki was telling him was true, and Tony had very little reason to think otherwise, then the guy was in one hell of a situation. And Tony was going to do something about it.

But not tonight. He was exhausted and sleep took him as soon as he lay down, barely even giving him a chance to enjoy the comforting warmth of Loki nearby.

The inevitable nightmares came some time later.

Tony found himself back in the desert. Hot, tired, scared. Vague, blurry images of being dragged from one cave to another, bound and gagged flashed across his vision. He couldn’t tell if they were real memories or imagined ones, but it didn’t matter. It was the fear that was real. And it was all consuming. Dirty faces peered at him and made demands in a language he didn’t understand as hands grabbed him, guns pressed into his spine, his head, his face. He felt like he was being suffocated. He screamed but no sound came. He tried to fight but his body didn’t respond to him.

Blind panic began to bubble up his throat.

Reality crashed back over him and suddenly his body responded. He thrashed and yelled before his mind had a chance to register where he truly was. He sat up violently, his heavy breathing rasping loudly in the darkness. He could feel cold sweat coating his skin as he ran a hand through his hair and tried to ground himself, his thoughts still lost in the whirlwind of memories, battling to try to surface from them. One hand remained locked in his hair, while the other gripped the sheets at his side as he stared wide-eyed into the darkness ahead of him, working to pick out the familiar shapes of his bedroom. Something, anything that would help his mind relax into the familiarity of the room.

Something brushed the hand that held his sheets in a white knuckled grip and he flinched reactively. But the thing didn’t back away. It was warm to the touch, a hand he realized after a second.

“Tony...” a sleepy voice said softly from somewhere to his right. A familiar voice. His thoughts grasped for it.

The hand slipped over his own and gripped it gently, but firmly and something moved in the bed beside him.

“Tony, you’re ok,” the voice was smooth, a clipped accent enunciating the words with reassuring calm.

He glanced sideways to find Loki sat up in the bed beside him, watching him carefully, his features shrouded in the shadows of the dark room. Tony gave a shaky breath and tried to make his vocal chords response, “Sorry...I...”

Loki hushed him calmly, “I know. Don’t apologize.”

Tony tugged at his hair if only to try to get his hand to stop shaking.

Loki shifted beside him so that the sides of their bare chests were pressed against each other. The hand that covered his own slipped away, passed around his back so that an elbow rested on his shoulder, and he felt that hand now work its way between the fingers that pulled at his scalp, working them free of the grip. Carefully, Loki moved Tony’s hand away from his hair and slipped his own into the mess in its stead. He could feel the man’s warm, calm breaths against his skin.

“Are you with me?” Loki asked, close-by, his other hand slipped under Tony’s. Tony gripped it instinctively, but Loki did not react.

Tony swallowed, and nodded quickly, his reeling mind beginning to come under control, “Yeah,” he said breathily, not looking at him, “Yeah I’m here.”

He felt Loki’s thumb brush against the top of his head, “Good.”

Tony took one deep, controlled breath and looked sideways at him, expecting to see an expression of concern that was completely unwarranted. He was fine god dammit. But Loki wasn’t even looking at him, instead he was looking down at the sheets they were sat under, distracted by some thought or other. Tony wasn’t sure why, but the man’s apparent disinterest was comforting in its own way, “What are you looking at?”

Loki met Tony’s gaze with the tired eyes of a man roused unexpectedly from sleep he sorely needed, but there was no irritation there, “I was wondering at what point in your life you decided that you would succumb to the cliché of silk sheets.”

Tony scowled at him, “Now? At a time like this you’re questioning my bedding choices?!”

Loki raised an eyebrow at him, lowering the hand from Tony’s head to simply let his forearm hang over his chest, long fingers just brushing his skin, as Loki regarded him, “I could continue to ask you if you’re ok if you prefer, but I imagine the answer won’t change and I get the impression that the constant pandering does nothing to help.”

“Well I guess that mind-reader act wasn’t an act after all,” Tony mumbled and Loki smiled a victorious smile.

“Educated guess,” Loki corrected, leaning back a little but to Tony’s relief he didn’t remove his arm from his shoulders, “I told you, I’ve suffered from nightmares myself.”

His breathing had calmed almost completely, but there was still that residual twist to his stomach that had yet to dissipate, but it was certainly on its way, “So that was true?” he asked, looking at Loki with a raised eyebrow.

It was hard to pinpoint the man’s expression in the dark but he could see his smile falter a little, and he hesitated before he said, “Yes.”

Tony paused before he asked his next question. Whether it was the rush of adrenaline that still had faded, or the odd vulnerability that people seem to adopt late at night but he needed to know, “What else is...you know...real?” he paused and rephrased, “What is real that I think I know about you?”

He watched quietly as Loki looked away, thinking for what felt like an age before saying, “All of it. Which is unusual to say the least. Most don’t know my real name.”

“What about us?” Tony asked, in a way he hoped sounded flippant and nonchalant, then shook his head, “No, actually don’t worry about it. It shouldn’t matter. I’m being selfish.”

“No,” Loki answered, unexpectedly quickly but he had gone back to peering at the sheets thoughtfully, “No, it matters. But I don’t know that I can answer the question. Because you have to understand I don’t know myself, not truly. As I said, I have not simply been Loki in a very long-time and...” he trailed off and Tony didn’t push it only waited patiently, “What I do know, is that despite the circumstances of our meeting, when I’m with you my life has felt,” he seemed to struggle for a word for a moment before finishing with, “easier.”

It was not the word that Tony had been expecting nor really hoping would describe their relationship if he was being honest, but the weight of it was clearly significant to Loki. That mattered more than whatever Tony was expecting.

Apparently sensing the effect of his words, Loki continued, “I’m sorry if that’s what you wanted to hear but -”

Tony held up his free hand , “Hey, you’ve explained yourself enough to me for one day,” his eyes flicked down to Loki’s lips for a second then back up to his eyes, “I am gonna have to kiss you now though,” he said, with a mock apologetic shrug, “I hope that’s ok.”

Loki smiled softly in the darkness, “I’ll allow it.”

With that, Tony leant forward and pressed his lips to Loki’s. He felt Loki’s hand lift back up and knot his fingers into his hair as his own slipped up the side of Loki’s neck so that his thumb caressed the man’s smooth cheek. It felt as good as it had every time before.

It felt real.


	16. Chapter 16

When Jarvis’s alarm awoke Tony the next morning, the first emotion that passed through his mind was confusion. The alarm was only supposed to go off on Mondays when he was supposed to meet Steve and Pepper, as far as his memory went it was Tuesday...wasn’t it?

He scowled into his pillow. Had the day before just been some dream?

That would make an unfortunate amount of sense. All things considered Loki turning up and confessing all was the least probable outcome of the last few days. Even if it was the one that Tony had wanted. But it seemed as though it had all been some addled dream if Jarvis's impeccable time keeping was to be believed. Tony was more surprised he had actually managed to drag himself to his bed rather than just pass out in the workshop like he usually did. Loki had likely simply fled the city after all.

Sadness and disappointment followed quickly behind the realization. It had been one hell of a dream, realistic and positive, and a nice reprieve from the usual nightmares that plagued him. Though the nightmare within the dream was an interesting concept. With a sigh, he began the process of rearranging his sprawled limbs to push himself from the mattress, only to wince as the result of 48 hours of sledgehammering a concrete wall made itself known in the deep, painful ache of his arms and back.

“You can turn that off, Jarvis, I'm up,” he grumbled quietly as he carefully maneuvered his arms and lifted his upper body from the mattress.

The alarm quieted as he spoke.

“If that is something that happens everyday, I will have to reconsider how often I stay,” a sleepy voice muttered from somewhere beside him.

Tony flinched at the unexpected sound but managed to suppress the yelp that would usually have come with it as he searched for the source. A wave of relief flooded through his chest as he found Loki laid on his front not far from him, arms tucked under his pillow apparently unaware of Tony’s reaction. His eyes were still closed, partially hidden by strands of black hair that had fallen over his face. The covers had slipped down his back, exposing his pale shoulder blades, defined muscles pressing gently against his skin.

Tony smiled softly himself, but only because Loki couldn’t see. Couldn’t let him see that, of course. Though if he was here and yesterday did happen then it begged a new question, “Jarvis what gives with the alarm anyway?”

“Mr. Rogers is awaiting you in the lounge, sir. He has said it is important.”

“No rest for the wicked,” Tony muttered, wondering what Steve so urgently that he came up here without warning. He reached out and prodded Loki in the arm and not entirely to convince himself that yes he was definitely real, “Come on Sleeping Beauty, get up.”

Loki made no attempt to move, his eyes remaining firmly closed, “Funny, I don’t remember Mr. Rogers being my personal assistant.”

“Thought you were an early bird,” Tony commented, easily.

“I can be, when needs must,” Loki replied airily.

Tony sat up on his knees on the mattress, “You already forgot the rules I gave you yesterday? I’m not leaving you unattended in here.”

Loki cracked open one eye and peered up at him sleepily, “Worried I’ll find your secret diary?” despite the hair over his face, Tony could see him smirking. A sudden immense want to simply roll him over and wipe that smirk off his face welled up in him, but Tony suppressed it. He had time for that now. Well two months or so anyway…

Tony shoved the thoughts to one side, then lifted two fingers of his hand, “Rule number two, you cannot be anywhere in this penthouse unattended.”

As he spoke, Loki closed his eye again and inhaled, rolling over onto his back with an exaggerated effort. Tony took a second to glance over the man’s equally toned chest. He definitely worked out. “I remember,” he said, “But I don’t think Mr. Rogers would be especially understanding if I was to sit in on your meeting. What harm could I possibly do alone in your room?” he scratched his chest idly.

“I actually hate to think,” Tony muttered glancing around the room at the stacks of papers and loose bits of unfinished engineering, “If you want to hang around, how about you go see Thor? I’ll let you go there on your own,” he suggested, swinging his legs off the bed and beginning to pull together a collection of clothes from the surrounding wardrobes.

Loki sighed and pushed himself upright finally opening both eyes as he did, “Very well, if I must. I can’t promise I can be there for more than fifteen minutes however.”

“I don’t think it will take that long,” Tony replied as he pulled on a t-shirt. Loki ran a hand through his hair to pull it from his eyes, stood without another word and dressed in the clothes he had arrived in yesterday.

“Look, I’m sorry,” Tony said as Loki finished pulling his shirt on, “It’s just for now. I don’t know what he wants, might be something, might be nothing. And I honestly have no idea what’s been left out around in this room so right now I can’t leave you alone here.”

Loki pulled on his dark jeans with a grace that Tony did not know it was possible to have while dressing, “I understand. Although, I can’t promise that I won’t come across that diary. I was exceptional at my job.”

Tony scowled at him, “Not something to brag about right now.”

Loki just smiled at him, resting his hands in his pockets now that he was dressed. “Come on, the sooner this is over with, the sooner, well it’s over with,” Tony shrugged and headed for the door.

Steve was stood waiting at the coffee machine, watching it as it poured out a drink. He looked up and smiled in greeting as they came into the penthouse. A knowing glint seemed to appear in his eye as he spotted Loki emerge behind him.

“Good morning,” he greeted, “I’m glad to see you managed to work out your differences.”

Loki glanced uncertainly at Tony waiting for him to take the lead, so he gave a shrug in response, “Well, we’re pretty reasonable people, decided to give it a couple of months at least.”

Steve nodded, clearly glad to hear that Tony had another sitter that could be relied on for maybe a little longer, “Unfortunately, I’m here on rather confidential matters,” he looked apologetically at Loki who raised a hand in front of him.

“I know, I was actually just going,” he replied, then looked to Tony, “Let me know when it’s safe to return. I’ll try to tolerate my brother until then.”

“Sure, see you soon,” Tony replied quickly, offering a brief smile, and Loki nodded to Steve in farewell then headed for the lift doors. Tony called after him as he walked away, “Don’t go wandering! I’ll know if you do!”

Loki pressed a button on the inside of the lift and had time to cross a long finger over his heart with a smile before the doors slid shut.

With that distraction out of sight, Tony focused fully on Steve, “So, to what do I owe the pleasure? And where’s Pep?”

Steve handed him the fresh coffee, “Pepper is going over the budget for next quarter before they reach you for approval on Friday.”

“Mm, you know how budgets get me hot,” Tony muttered sarcastically as he took the coffee and wrapped both hands around it.

Steve chuckled but it was forced, “Well, my being here may dampen your mood a little.”

Tony raised an eyebrow, “Oh yeah?”

“T’Challa called for you yesterday afternoon. I didn’t bring it to you immediately, you seemed pretty busy but…” Steve grew serious, “he believes Wakanda is compromised. He’s worried that they have a security breach somewhere within the company and he wanted to inform you before we went any further merging systems for the joint venture.”

Tony frowned slightly, “Any more details?”

Steve shook his head, “He didn’t tell me, he’d much rather speak to you about it if you are willing?”

Tony scowled into his coffee cup as he took a burning sip. A part of him couldn’t help but immediately throw suspicions at Loki’s feet, since he wasn’t a big believer in coincidences. But given that Loki had never mentioned Wakanda and that his operations had apparently been centered in northern Europe and then New York city, it was unlikely that the African company had ever crossed his radar.

“Set up a meeting with him,” Tony said after a moment of thinking. “When are you free?” Steve asked, “I’m not sure that this can wait until Friday.”

“Tomorrow then. Any time will do.”

Steve noted something down in the notebook he carried everywhere, “I’ll see what I can do. Has the particle accelerator project taken a back seat?”

Tony rolled his shoulders, a deep-seated ache reminding him that he could benefit from resting maybe just a little, “For now. I can come back to it. The walls aren’t going anywhere just yet.”

“You know, you could always just outsource the work?” Steve suggested, helpfully.

“C’mon Rogers, you know I don’t like the O word,” Tony replied, raising one eyebrow at him.

Steve chuckled and tucked his notebook under his arm, “Of course, my mistake. I’ll get hold of T’Challa this afternoon and let you know what’s going on.”

“Thanks Rogers.”

“No problem at all, Tony,” Steve smiled that genuine smile, “You know where to find us if you need anything.”

“I just say your names three times in a mirror and you pop up right?” Tony said playfully.

“Something like that. If the mirror was Jarvis,” Steve laughed as he walked to the lift, “I’ve emailed you your itinerary for Friday by the way, please read it if you can spare it attention for five minutes?”

“No promises,” Tony called as the lift doors closed, already gesturing in the air to bring up Jarvis’s holographic interface.

The coffee machine whirred as Tony went to refill his cup. Once he’d relayed the message to Loki that the coast was clear, he decided it was probably for the best that he start to think about what he’d do today. Since his arms were becoming increasingly stiff as the morning went on, the sledgehammer was not looking especially attractive. Besides, he likely had a lot of things to catch up on in the office since his tantrum on Friday had meant he had deserted his duties by midday. Not very professional. He’d blown of Peter as well...

It was rare that he made the decision for a voluntary office day and he made a note to prove to both Steve and Pepper that he did in fact know where they were based. Always good to keep them in the loop about the brownie points he was awarding himself. They were the only ones who could actually reward him for them.

He was sat on the sofa trying to find the itinerary Steve had mentioned somewhere in the landfill of his inbox when the lift doors slid open. Tony barely had time to look away from the screen of his emails that Jarvis had pulled up before Loki spoke, striding out of the elevator.

“You know, something occurred to me on the way down to Thor’s workshops,” he announced, as he crossed the room in just a few long strides.

Tony raised an eyebrow, gesturing to dissipate the inbox before Loki could read too much of it, “Oh? What’s that?”

Loki came to a stop in front him, looking down at him with an excited glint in his eye, “If I am to stay, then we still have a challenge to settle.”

Tony took a sip of his coffee to hide his true reaction before making an exaggerated show of thinking. He had quietly hoped that the whole showcase of the weekend had helped slip the ice skating from Loki’s mind. He wasn’t sure why he’d agreed to it in the first place. A combination of never backing down from a challenge and simply wanting a reasonable excuse to see Loki at time had bolstered his confidence somewhat, “I don’t recall any challenge.”

The smirk on Loki’s face grew. Did he just smirk constantly when he was in a good mood? “I wouldn’t worry, I remember quite clearly.”

“Did it have something to do with your apparent vendetta against the continued use of my legs?” Tony asked, light-heartedly.

“It’s ice skating, not kick-boxing Tony, you’ll survive,” Loki’s forehead then knitted together in mock seriousness, “Though, you are more than free to back out if you are concerned you will fail. I will have to mark it as a conceding defeat.”

“That’s not what I said is it?” Tony responded, quicker than he should have, if he wanted to maintain an air of nonchalance.

“Good,” Loki grinned fully, “Thor has given me the name of an ice rink, since it was so hard for you to find one apparently.”

“Is it near here, or preferably near a hospital?” Tony asked, trying to figure out another delaying tactic.

“He said it was somewhere close to the river,” Loki gave a shrug and glanced out of the window over the city, “Are you busy this evening?”

“Depends.”

“Which means no,” Loki raised a knowing eyebrow. Tony mentally cursed Loki’s ability to read almost anyone like a book, “Because I should return to the apartment, wash and change, and resume some semblance of my usual routine for now. But I can meet you there later to settle things if you so wish?”

“Sure fine,” Tony wafted his free hand nonchalantly, “I’ve got some stuff I need to sort out today anyway it looks like.”

Loki looked like he was about to say something then shook his head slightly, “I shan’t ask. But I will message you with the address and meet you there this evening.”

Tony dropped his shoulders a little in defeated acceptance and placed his coffee cup inn the table in front of him, “Sounds good, that’ll give me time to make sure to go for a nice long run, maybe a bike ride. Spend an hour just enjoying having intact shin bones.”

“My, my, what an overdramatic afternoon you have to look forward to,” Loki smiled for a second and then it faltered in that way that meant something unpleasant had crossed the man's mind that he was not about to share. He looked to the lift, “Anyway, I should be going.”

Sensing the indecision, Tony raised an eyebrow and pushed himself to his feet, “You gonna go without saying goodbye again.”

Loki seemed comforted at his movement and his smile pressed further into his cheek again, “Well you were very low down, it felt like a lot of work to bend down there,” Loki tilted his head at him as Tony stepped up close the distance between the two.

Tony scowled playfully, “Are you saying I’m not worth the effort of bending at the waist?”

Loki just smiled. Then without another word Tony lifted head and kissed him. Loki froze for a second but recovered quickly easing into it with natural grace, one hand lifting to gently rest against Tony's cheek. Tony leant into it, unable to prevent the deep, satisfied inhale that flooded his senses with that now endlessly comforting scent. His own hands rested on Loki’s hips, feeling the curve of his hip bones through the thin material of his t-shirt. It was a brief, fleeting kiss. Still hesitant. There was clearly a part of Loki that was still coming to terms with this whole situation and likely would be for the duration of whatever this was. Tony knew he would have to enjoy what he could.

“I’ll see you later,” Loki whispered after he’d pulled back enough to lock his deep eye Tony’s, his hand still resting against his cheek.

“Not if I see you first.”

Loki smiled softly as his thumb gave one final brush against his cheek before he lowered his hand and slipped from the penthouse.

***************

The ice rink was empty when Loki arrived. It was fully sized with one glass wall that gave a good view over the river outside where the evening sun gave the water below a distinct orange glow. It was clearly meant primarily for public use. There were no tiered stands like there would be in a sport facility, and the markings on the rink itself were largely faded. A few cones were out in a loose circle around the middle, probably left out from the latest skating session.

Loki had skated fervently when he was younger but he had not had the time nor the resources to pick it up again while here. The familiar chill of the air was comforting. Although the winter of New York was as icy as his home, the stifling summer could be too much. The hired ice skates were not as comfortable as the ones that Loki had once had, but the feeling of wearing them was enough to bring more than a spark of nostalgia. There was a note of trepidation as he stepped out onto the ice, as he thought perhaps he had forgotten how. But he smiled to himself as he stood at the edge. It was apparently something not easily forgotten.

He would have to mark this down as a good day, he decided to himself as he did a lap of the rink. It was clear that Tony was genuine in his offer, the authorities would not be called, and while he planned his escape, he would have a sanctuary in which to hide and rest. And an ally who was willing to help him. That cared for him. Maybe more than just cared.

As far as Loki could work out, those feelings were reciprocated, but it was still hard to determine whether they were real or just another survival mechanism designed to help him keep his safe place, which was not solid foundation for any relationship. Platonic or romantic. The biggest flaw in his defense theory, though, was the hint of sadness that came at the thought of the inevitable end of their time together. Would it be easier on both of them to back off a little? If so, why was he here, offering to teach the man to skate?

It wasn’t long before the student arrived to distract him. Loki slid to a stop as he heard the door to the rink open and then close and he spotted Tony approaching the ice, a pair of those bright blue skates hanging over his shoulder. The man stopped at the opening in the rink wall as Loki drifted over.

“Were you aware this place doesn’t actually open this late?” Tony greeted as he peered around the room, inspecting the rink with a look of suspicion, “Good thing you’ve got friends in high places.”

That would make sense, Loki mused to himself from where he stood on the ice leaning on the waist high wall as casually as he could manage, “Is that why it’s so quiet?”

Tony bent to start untying his shoes, “I am about to demonstrate just how quickly and how often a grown man can hit the ground and still remain conscious. Did you really think I’d allow that to happen in public view? You’re lucky you’re getting front row seats. I'm not letting Twitter get hold of that kind of footage.”

“So, I should probably dismiss the photographer I had lined up?” Loki pointed to the doorway through which Tony had just come.

“Immediately,” Tony stood upright having kicked off his shoes, replaced them with the skates, and clapped his hands together in readiness, only wobbling the tiniest bit, “Right, let’s get this over with. I asked Thor for some hints before I came and he said I would need a penguin? I can only hope he was being literal.”

Loki frowned at him for a moment before he realized what he was talking about. He glanced about the room until he found what he was looking for lined up neatly against the wall of the rink not so far away. He skated over to the short penguin skating aids and pushed one back to where Tony was waiting in the opening, still yet to step onto the ice. Loki had to repress a smile at the look of realization blooming on Tony’s face.

“That’s not a penguin, that’s a Zimmer frame in a stupid outfit,” Tony stated, deadpan.

Loki brought it to the entrance of the rink and rest one hand gently on its head, “This is step-one. Children use it.”

Tony pointed at the penguin and looked at Loki, “This is humiliating.”

“Only for you,” Loki pointed out.

“I’m glad you’re having such a good time, Chuckles,” Tony fired back, holding onto the low walls of the rink and eyeing the ice at his feet.

Loki laughed quietly to himself, “Will you be coming onto the ice at all or are you hoping that ice-skating skill will simply absorb into your skin?”

“Yeah, I think I can see it all pretty good, reckon I can get 90% from right here,” Tony said, genuine trepidation in his voice hidden under thick layers of over-confidence, making no move closer to the ice itself.

“Tony, even children can ice skate,” Loki said gently, skating a little closer so that he was stood right beside the entrance to the rink, “You will be fine. If you cannot trust me on anything else, will you trust me on this?” he offered a hand to him.

Tony glanced between his hand and his face for a second before he exhaled sharply through his nose, “Ok well, let’s get on with this, you’ve only got fifty minutes left to cripple me.” Despite that, Tony took hold of Loki’s hand.

Loki smiled, warmly as Tony gripped his fingers, “More than enough.”

Tony took to ice-skating about as well as Loki had expected. With an almost violent need to excel immediately. Having refused to even touch the penguin, Loki spent most of the time there skating backwards while holding Tony’s hands as the man wobbled and scraped along the ice, explaining and encouraging his progress. Though, as with probably everything else in his life, Tony was an exceptionally fast learner, and it wasn’t long before he was able to skate without Loki’s constant support. Which allowed Loki to enjoy the freedom of simply skating as Tony began to develop from uneasy steps into real skating technique. He never went too far away though, skating around him in a not so subtle effort to show off.

For the first time since he could remember, he felt normal. This was what normal people did. They went on dates to ice rinks with friends, partners, who knew who you were, your name, your occupation, and were unconcerned by them. This was what he could look forward to if he could escape Thanos. This was a taste what he was working towards and he would lock the memory away for what would likely be much darker times to come.

For now, though he had a bet to win and if Tony couldn’t skate from one end of the rink to the other unaided by the time their hour was up, then Loki would lose their bet and he couldn’t have that.

He was drawn from his thoughts as Tony yelped and dropped to the ice as his skates came out from under him in quite a spectacular fashion. Loki had skated a little distance away, but stopped and turned at the sound. Tony was sat on the ice, with a mildly pained look on his face as he probed his side with his fingers.

“Hey, Snow Queen,” Tony called, voice echoing around the empty hall, “You gonna come over here and help me up? Or was this all part of your elaborate plan to freeze me to death so you can steal my company.”

Loki raised an eyebrow and skated deliberately slowly over to him, “Are you always so dramatic?”

Tony sat forward as Loki approached, “Only when I have an audience,” he quipped then pulled up his shirt to show Loki his side, “I think I’ve broken a hip. Is that possible if you’re under sixty? Is this a new record?”

Loki folded his arms over his chest, barely glancing at Tony’s very unbroken side, “Yes, I believe it is. We should inform the American Medical Association.”

“Ha ha,” Tony said sarcastically, pulling his shirt down.

“You’ve probably bruised yourself, Tony, but you will live I’m sure,” Loki replied smirking.

Tony huffed but then looked up at Loki with a brand new expression, as though a new thought had immediately distracted him, “Hey, I’ve got a proposition for you.”

Loki raised an eyebrow, “Does it include getting up and carrying on the ice-skating lesson?”

“No, but it does serve as a good distraction for a minute while my hip recovers,” Tony replied, pointing at him, “Wakanda, you heard of it?”

Loki frowned and shook his head, “No, I can’t say I have.”

“Rule 1 is still in effect,” Tony raised his eyebrows to emphasize the point.

Loki rolled his eyes, “Tony, I promise you, I don't know what Wakanda is.”

Tony inspected his face for a moment, “Ok I believe you,” he decided and the continued as Loki quietly wondered how long he would last sitting on ice. “Wakanda is a company, not massive but the work they are doing is fantastic. Their lead scientist, Shuri, she’s phenomenal.”

“Good for them?” Loki replied, not entirely sure where this was going.

“We are in the process of setting up a joint venture with them to branch out into the African market,” he was talking excitedly, it was an endearing quality Loki decided as he watched the enthusiasm in his expression, “Hit a little bump in the road though, they have a security breach somewhere.”

“That is a shame, but I don’t see what it has to with me?” Loki narrowed his eyes suspiciously. Maybe it wasn’t so endearing after all, “If you about to accuse me, I will tell you now I have nothing to do with it. I’ve never set foot on that continent let alone worked there.”

Tony quickly waved his hands, “No I know, that’s not why I brought it up. If I was to look for an expert in data security, where would I look?” he held his hands up to Loki, eyebrows raised.

Loki scowled, “You must be joking, Tony. I’m not a data security expert.”

Tony lowered his hands but his expression was just one of optimistic encouragement, “I dunno, I would say it takes an expert to be able to assess the time required to breach something from reading a four page report. Don’t you?”

Loki opened his mouth reply but found he had no response. Yet another unexpected turn. He gave a breathy, uncertain chuckle, still not entirely sure Tony wasn’t just messing around, “Did you hit your head on the way down there? I’m not an expert. I’m a criminal. I caused the breaches. I wouldn’t know how to-”

“How to what? How to stop you?” Tony finished victoriously, “Surely you’d know better than anyone. And if you can stop you, then you can stop anyone doing your thing right?”

Loki went to reply, but found Tony’s argument irritatingly sound.

When he didn’t reply, Tony carried on talking to fill the silence, “Look, how about you just sit in on the meeting I’ve got set up with their CEO tomorrow, he’s going to run everything through with me properly. Just listen. Just think, what would you do? Then tell me and they can plug the gaps that you’d see.”

A frown marred Loki’s face, genuine conflict racing through his mind, “I don’t know if this is a good idea...if they find out who I am, let alone that you know who I am…it could damage both of us.”

“Hey, you wanted to make amends for what you’ve been up to? This is step one. This can be your penguin,” Tony grinned at his own joke, but Loki was too uncertain to join in, he looked to the ice at his feet instead, forehead creased in thought, “C’mon L, I’m asking your help here.”

Whether it was the word help or simply a nickname that Tony had likely barely registered as being any different from ‘Chuckles’ ‘Snow Queen’, or ‘Sleeping Beauty’, but he found himself unable to argue. After everything Tony had risked, this request was the least Loki could do. With a resigned sigh, Loki threw his hands up and looked back to Tony, “Fine, I will sit with you on this meeting and tell you what I think. But he cannot know my name or my background is that fair, ideally not even know I’m there if at all possible.”

“Fair enough,” Tony smiled and held his hand up to him, “Now you gonna help me up, my butt is frozen.” Loki smirked as he grabbed Tony’s wrist and pulled him unsteadily to his feet. “And it looks as though you only have fifteen minutes left before I win.”

“You’re already skating on your own Tony,” Loki pointed out as he let go of Tony’s hand and the man remained firmly upright.

“Ok well, there’s still time for a very serious accident, don't worry,,” Tony wobbled where he stood but it was obviously deliberate.

Loki smirked and glided backwards a couple of feet. That light-hearted feeling had drifted away replaced by the heaviness of what Tony had asked of him. He couldn’t say no. He wouldn’t say no. Not to Tony after everything he had done. But he was worried about another person finding out who he was and what he did. And all he had to protect him was this handsome, kind-hearted, genius currently skating uncertainly across ice towards him who was, knowingly or not, risking almost as much in sheltering him.

Maybe it was enough? It felt like was enough. At least until his time was up.


	17. Chapter 17

Being in the office any other day than Friday threw off Tony’s whole week. It felt odd sitting at his desk knowing it wasn’t the weekend the next day. His discomfort was made physical by the large bruise that had developed on his ass and upper leg from his very sudden and unwanted introduction to an ice rink. He didn’t even have the victory of the wager to comfort him as he sat on the edge of his desk chair at a very specialized angle to avoid weight on any part of his injured backside. Loki had won fair and square. Apparently, years of acting as though your job didn’t have you on the verge of a mental break down had done wonders for Loki’s teaching abilities. Despite Tony’s likely less than subtle attempts at sabotage, Loki had successfully had him skate the full length of the rink unaided. And the smug asshole had yet to determine what the cost of losing would be. 

In fact, once their hour was up, the man had declared his victory and the two parted ways not long after, Loki determined he should return to his own apartment if he was to be helping with his the Wakanda situation the next morning. Which made sense, he supposed. In all honesty, Tony was surprised that he had agreed in the first place. When the idea had come to him, he hadn’t been sure whether it actually was a good idea or whether it was in fact just a way to give Loki a reasonable excuse to be around Stark Industries now if his primary goal was now moot. 

As long as it really was moot, muttered that quiet, constantly paranoid little voice in his mind. But he hushed it very quickly. As he had reinstalled his own babysitting protocols to Jarvis, he’d added a few in for Loki as well. If the guy stepped off the path in any way, it’d be logged and reported to Tony immediately. He wasn’t too worried about it. He was more worried about how empty his bed felt last night without him in it. 

Steve had managed to arrange a meeting with T’Challa for late morning, but Tony’d made a concerted effort to come down to the office for a reasonably early time. Tony exhaled through his nose and tried to refocus on the report that hovering in a hologram just over his desk. That report Bruce had wanted him to go through properly a couple of weeks ago that he’d unfortunately never gotten around to. As long as he was in the office, he might as well try and get ahead of himself, that way he could maybe get back to his demolition project on Friday. 

He glanced at the time on his watch. It was half an hour from the scheduled meeting time, Loki would probably be here about now. 

As if on cue, there was a knock at his door, a second’s pause, and then Pepper’s head poked through. There was a look of unconcealed surprise on her face as for once Tony was actually in his office doing work. 

“Loki Laufeyson for you, Tony,” she said, smiling now that the surprise had been overtaken by professionalism

“Thanks Pep,” Tony replied, gesturing in the air to mark his place in the report and closing it. He’d given the office a once over when he’d arrived this morning to make sure that nothing had been left out, but given that he was not here particularly often and that it was much more of a public space than his penthouse, there was not very much that needed clearing away before a former spy entered the room. 

Tony stood from his chair as Pepper held the door open and Loki stepped around her, smiling and quietly giving her his thanks. She smiled a wide genuine smile in response and closed the door behind her on the way out. 

Tony realized that other than the charity gala, he had never seen Loki in anything other than in jeans and either a shirt or a t-shirt depending on just where he was on the casual to smart-casual scale on that given day.  But he’d never seen him in what Tony would call professional attire. The fact that he had missed out on this until now was an immeasurable shame, he decided as Loki stood in front of the now closed door. He was wearing a slim-fitted suit of slate grey, tailored to his form with a quality his own tailors should be envious of. A matching waistcoat was just visible over his lower torso where the suit jacket hung open slightly. The white shirt underneath looked as though it was purposefully a little tight, laying taut against the skin of his chest, underlying the deep green stripe of color that was his slim tie. HIs hair was brushed back over his head as it always was, but it looked as though it had been deliberately left to form slight curls and waves that rested on his shoulders. 

“So, you’ll dress up for a company you’ve never heard of, but not for me,” Tony quipped, hoping to mask the warmth rising in his cheeks. 

Loki gave a hesitant smirk, none of his usual confidence about his stance, “I didn’t want to give the wrong impression about my presence in your office.”

“Still worried about the gossip columns, huh?” Tony asked, moving around to the front his desk and leaning back against it, “You know, you can come closer, it’s not a trap. Honest.”

Loki remained where he was a moment before glancing around the room and taking a couple of steps nearer.

“How’s it feel working for the good guys?” Tony smiled, hoping to alleviate some of Loki’s apparent caution. 

Loki exhaled through his nose, as though the thought of that had not crossed his mind and then he looked to the floor, “I still don’t know how much help I could possibly provide in this. I know nothing of this company, of their systems, how they operate, what they even do.”

“Do you even know what I do?” Tony replied quickly, then gave an amused smile as he realized where Loki’s hesitation may be coming from, “Are you nervous?”

"No, I’m not nervous, why would I be nervous?” he snapped back, just a little too quickly to be sincere. 

Tony’s smile began to spread only for him to quickly wipe it and give a casual shrug, “I would have thought this was right in your wheelhouse. Up in the big boy office, swimming with the sharks.”

“I always tried to avoid swimming in any pond where I was not the biggest fish,” Loki replied, still glancing around the room uncertainly, as though expecting something to jump out at him at any moment, “I only ever attempted to enter any hub of operations as a last resort. Never have I need a part of them.”

Tony frowned skeptically, “Not even at your own company?”

At that, Loki finally met his eyes, raising an eyebrow as he did, “What part of my situation as I have described it thus far gives any impression that I would be included in anything like this? Or would even want to be?”

“Fair point,” Tony conceded.

Satisfied, Loki resumed his inspection of the room, “I get given my orders, I carry them out, I present the results. That’s it. I wouldn’t be able to tell you how they get the intel they use to target who they do,” he looked back to Tony, his forehead creased, “Another reason why I don’t know how much help I can be here.”

Tony checked his watch quickly as he came out of his lean, then stepped closer to Loki, “Just relax. Listen to what they say and either you can help which,” he gave two thumbs up, “great, a little bit of karma under your belt never hurts. Or you can’t help,” he shrugged and dropped his hands to his sides, “you can bow out and all it’s cost you is an hour of your time plus however long it took you to get dressed this morning.”

Loki studied Tony’s face for a moment before exhaling audibly and shoving his hands in his pockets, “Fine,” he replied, though clearly not all that fine, but there was no time to try anything else to lighten the guy’s mood. 

His watched vibrated a little against his wrist as a silent ring tone and he just tapped it without paying much attention, instead looking up into the air in front of them. Blue lines of light were forming a grid in the air that slipped over the two of them smoothly, head to toe before flipping vertical and hovering a large square above them for a moment. Tony took the brief pause as a chance to glance at Loki to ensure he was looking appropriately impressed then gave him a reassuring pat on the arm. The vertical grid began to shrink and coalesce into the form of two figures, becoming more and more detailed until two people stood before them, a shallow blue glow underlying their images. Holographic teleconferences had saved him a hell of a lot of flying miles, even if it was only Wakanda and maybe three other companies that shared Stark Industries capabilities for them. 

“Tony, what is this?” Loki started suddenly, eyes wide as he watched the focusing lights, then turned and fixed Tony with a look that was bordering on fear, “You said they wouldn’t know I was here,” he muttered hurriedly.

Tony frowned at the sudden reaction, but didn’t have time to address it properly. 

T’Challa and Shuri, the brother and sister leaders of Wakanda stood side by side, their dichotomous personalities showing immediately. T’Challa was dressed in a professional, dark suit, with his hands held neatly behind his back and a serious expression on his face, and although he did briefly side eye Loki, formality prevented any immediate outburst. Shuri on the other hand stood relaxed, with her thumbs tucked into the belt loops of her brightly colored skirt, deliberately mismatched with a t-shirt with a logo Tony didn’t recognize. She grinned and waved almost as soon as they came into sharp focus. 

“Hi Tony!” she chirped happily. 

Tony gave Loki a final glance then returned Shuri’s smile, “Good morning, Shuri, and you T’Challa.”

T’Challa inclined his head, “Thank you for the offer of assistance Tony, we greatly appreciate it.”

“No problem at all,” Tony waved it away, “If we’re going to business together, then your problems are my problems and I don’t like having problems,” he clapped his hands together, ”So! I hope you don’t mind but I invited along a...” he trailed off and looked to Loki, considering how to refer to him. The man looked back at him, as though caught between in the decision to either throw a punch his way or simply leave the room. It left him frozen in place, “...a former colleague of mine. He has a little experience in the subject matter at hand.”

At that, he heard Loki exhale and a hand gripped his upper arm, “Tony can I have a word,” he growled, glaring at him with a passion that in any other circumstance, Tony would have found immensely attractive, but this was clearly neither the time nor the place. Perhaps later.

Tony held up one finger to the siblings, “Just one sec,“ he gave a relaxed shrug and allowed Loki to guide him a couple of steps away, “What’s up?” he asked, innocently. 

Loki fixed him with a dark glower, “You said all I had to do was listen,” he hissed, “You said they wouldn't even know I was here. You just introduced me to them!”

Tony shrugged, “If you didn’t think you were going to be seen what did you dress up for?” he made an attempt at a joke that fell on deaf, angry, ears. At that, he knew it was serious.

Loki widened his eyes as though he could understand how Tony could not see, “They know me now. They know me as associated with you, and as having experience in corporate security. Don’t you see how these dots could be easily pieced together by someone?”

Tony swallowed at the very good point. He had potentially messed up pretty hard. He would make it right. He held up his hands in a gently calming gesture, “I’m sorry, I didn’t think,” his apology seemed to relax something in Loki but not completely, “But they are a thousand miles away. There are just as many security consultants as there are people like you. As far as ruses go, aren’t half-truths easier to pull off than outright lies? I swear to you, they won’t know your name or how you actually know me. My dealings with Wakanda are strictly introductory right now, by the time anything more concrete comes about it’s likely you’ll already be in the wind.”

Loki took a deep breath and looked to the floor. His jaw was tense but he was clearly considering what Tony was saying. 

“Hey, if you really want to change who you are you’re gonna have to take some risks surely it’s better to do take them while I can be your safety net,” Tony said in a serious tone, and Loki’s eyes ticked back to his but before the moment got too heavy Tony smirked, “Think of this as your penguin!”

At that Loki exhaled and his shouldered dropped a little further, “Fine. But you owe me.”

Tony wafted a hand, he’d deal with whatever that was later, and turned back to the siblings who had fallen into their own discussion in the interim, “Sorry about that.”

T’Challa raised an eyebrow, “Is everything alright?”

Tony nodded, “Yep, Vogel here,” he glanced sideways to make sure Loki acknolwedged the fake name, which he did as a ripple of satisfying annoyance passed over his features, “was just wanting to clarify whether this was a live feed or just a prank of technology. Not very common these holocons, as you well know.”

“We’re not calling them that,” Shuri input.

“But that is not the topic of this holocon so shall we get right into it,” Tony continued, ignoring the comment, “I’ve been informed you are having security issues.”

Vogel was not a name he would be keeping, Loki thought to himself as he stood a step or so behind Tony, doing his best to not let the simmering annoyance and paranoia spill into his behavior. This was a time for acting. In a way, the act gave him some comfort and he tried to focus on the familiar process he was about to enter. They would give him the information, he would tell them how it might be done, and the resulting information was theirs to do with whatever they pleased.  Though that didn’t fully suppress the irritation that Tony had thrown him into this without actually telling him what was involved, what the risks where to him. It was just a little too close to how he had been treated over the last six years for him to be fully comfortable with. But at least with Tony, Loki could bring it up, and Tony had even explained himself and apologized. The man was not used to having to think about something like that, meanwhile Loki had to spend every waking moment doing so. He should really have anticipated something like this, but it wasn’t like a holographic meeting was a common occurrence. 

He swallowed his emotions. They could be assessed and dealt with later. For now, he had to concentrate. The bottom line was that Tony was right, if Loki did really want to one day come back from his escape attempt, he needed to learn how. Besides, Tony had asked for his help, Loki didn’t want to disappoint him. 

“We may,” the younger of the two, Shuri, corrected Tony, “My brother thinks it is a security issue.”

“What is?” Tony asked. 

“There has been a spate of unusual activity logged on the usernames of a number of our senior leaders,” T’Challa, the older, clarified. The comment piquing Loki’s interest, a red flag naturally, but could be a number of reasons, none of which meant security breach. 

Tony narrowed his eyes slightly, “Unusual how?” 

“All of the holographic shapefiles we use for the intricate designs are stored on one highly secure server, access to which is restricted to a small number,” T’Challa explained, Loki listening intently, “Anyone that logs into that system for any reason is tracked and their activity is recorded. Recently, we have seen a number of irregularities, in people opening files they are not involved in or multiple things in quick succession.” 

Another red flag raised in Loki’s mind. 

“So, you think you’ve been hacked,” Tony reasoned, though inaccurately. 

“Not possible,” Shuri shook her head, “The encryption I installed on that server is second to none, not even to yours Tony as we well know,” she gave a knowing smile that Tony deliberately did not acknowledge, an inside joke that Loki was not a part of, ”I personally think, my brother is overreacting.”

“Are you?” Tony asked him, “Is it unusual for your guys to look around in folders that aren’t theirs? Maybe they lost something.”

“It is highly unusual to have so many of these incidents in such a short period,” T’Challa replied, “I would rather treat this as a risk now than regret ignoring it later.”

“That’s fair. Vogel!” Tony turned to Loki, giving him a secret smirk that indicated that he had thought carefully about the name he was given for this, “What do you think?”

Loki fought not to react to that irritating smile and instead took a step forward, “I would start by pointing out that given a limited knowledge your company’s hierarchy, it’s business model or its key leaders, my thoughts are inherently limited in their usefulness. But I will say that there is no system in the world that is infallible if there is human input.”

Shuri frowned immediately, “What are you talking about?”

Loki didn’t answer the question, knowing that the explanation would be given in due time, “How long have your leaders been in your employ?” he asked, looking between the two, not entirely clear on who would be best placed to answer the question. 

“Over ten years,” T’Challa said, “And their loyalty is unquestionable,” his tone took on an accusatory note. 

“Had they been with you for a shorter time, I may have called that into question,” Loki told him, “But yes, you are right, decade in a career indicates very little incentive to do anything to threaten that stability.”

“Then why did you bring it up? My people would never steal from me,” Loki could hear the restrained snap in T’Challa’s words. 

“Corporate espionage is not a game for computer hackers,” Loki started, speaking confidently and refusing to put any emotion on his words. At least in this topic, he really was the most educated in the room, “They are content to make their millions in the black market and government dark zones. Rather, it is the sport of con artists.”

“Are you saying there is someone convincing my people to snoop through the files,” T’Challa asked hesitantly, the idea seeming to sink in.  

Loki nodded, “Often it is the easiest way into a system.”

“But I know my people, they would never do that,” T’Challa insisted as though personally offended at the allegation. 

Loki glanced sideways at Tony who looked entirely unfazed by the exchange, happy to simply listen, before continuing on, “In the usual circumstances, that is likely entirely true, but the operatives that carry out this work are shapeshifting manipulators of the highest order,” he tried to keep his voice as neutral as he could as he described his own sordid nature, “They will read their targets’ insecurities and adapt themselves to fill whatever role might be needed of them, whether it be confidante, mentor, technical expert, lover, anything they think might be needed to allow them to get close what it is they are after. Whoever this person is will have selected leaders with a weakness they can exploit.”

There was a silence in the room as his words were taken in. It was a several seconds before T’Challa spoke, “And this hypothetical person is convincing my people to show them our work? But there are records on multiple of our people’s logins, surely as a group that would not be allowed to happen.”

Loki considered the point for a moment before he responded, “it may well be that they are not aware of the others involvement and this operative is hedging their bets. That may actually be a good sign.”

T’Challa scowled, “How could any of this be good?”

“If they are hedging their bets in such a way, they likely don’t know what they’re looking for,” Loki replied simply. 

T’Challa took a deep breath. It was clear that at least some of what Loki was saying was making sense, “If this was true, then my people would come to me,” he stated, but it was not a confident argument. 

“Would they?” Loki asked, “By the time it has gotten to this point, the relationships that have been formed by the manipulator and their victim feels exceptionally real,” Loki paused to glance sideways at Tony, in some vain bid to assure him that his was not the case in his situation, but it was a complex sentiment to try to get across in a brief glance, “It takes a brave man indeed to go to his superior and admit that they showed some of the most secure files in your company simply because a stranger asked them.”

It seemed as though this was the final nail of logic in the coffin  T’Challa’s defense and he looked away shaking his head, “If they do not know what they are looking for, then how are we are target? Are they just guessing at that too?”

“That is not my area, I’m afraid, but what I do know is that the majority of these operatives have a sponsor backing them,” Loki started, forming the answer to the question as he went, “Often these sponsors work only a step ahead of rumor, in that it is often the lack of information of a target’s activity that piques an interest. When they ‘go quiet’ as it were.”

“You’re saying that our discretion is what has put us at risk?” 

“Based on nothing but the information you have provided, it's certainly possible,” Loki nodded. 

It was Shuri who asked the next question as T’Challa fell into in stoic thought, “How do we find this ‘operative’ as you call them?”

“I can’t answer that without more information,” Loki stated flatly. What he had explained was already more of an insight into his world than he had ever wanted to give and there was not a small amount of pain that came in seeing the disgust on the Wakandan’s faces at the very thought of his own activities. 

A tense silence settled on the group as each worried over their own thoughts, until it was Tony who spoke, looking back to the Wakanda leaders, “What are your next steps?”

“I don’t know yet,” T’Challa said, then looked to Loki, “You have given us a lot to think about, sir.”

Loki swallowed and nodded his head, deciding that not speaking was probably the best way to ensure that the creeping doubts of what he had just done did not spill over into his words.

“Thank you again for your assistance in this matter, Tony,” he said turning to the man, “We will be in contact once we have developed a plan of action.”

Tony nodded, “Alright, you know where to find me if you need me,” with that, Tony gestured and the holograms disappeared. 

As soon as the figures dissipated, Loki released the breath he didn’t realize he had been holding. It took his eyes a moment to adjust to the sudden loss of the light that had been given off by the pair of holograms, but when they did, he realized that Tony was watching him with that unreadable expression he was becoming increasingly familiar with. 

“What are you looking at?” he asked after a moment. 

“Was that all true?” Tony asked, simply. 

Loki hesitated, fighting the reactionary attempt to gauge what it was that Tony wanted to hear, and overriding it with the promise he had made not to lie to him again, “It was as honest an assessment as I could have made with the information at hand. Is that not what you wanted?”

Tony sniffed and pushed his hands into his pocket, “I mean, yeah, it was great. Just felt weird, knowing that you were describing yourself.”

Loki signed and ran and hand through his hair, “I knew this wasn’t a good idea...” he muttered, “Tony, you asked for an insight in how I worked. It is an uncomfortable business for all involved.”

“Yeah, yeah I know,” Tony replied, “Thank you for your help. I wouldn’t have been able to do anything with that intel.”

An unfamiliar but not unwelcome feeling flushed through him at the indication of genuine gratitude, “You’re welcome, I’m glad I could be of assistance.”

The usual, light-hearted Tony began to creep back into his expression as his forehead knitted together, “What was my insecurity?”

“What?”

“You know, the one you used to form the basis of your plan? The shape you shifted into,” Tony turned to face him more fully as he spoke. 

Loki pressed his lips together into a thin line, “I don’t want to get into that.”

“Why not?”

“Because you won’t like the answer.”

“I can take it.”

“No one can take it. That's the point of an insecurity.”

“I’m already in literal therapy. I got this. Just tell me.”

“Is this an interrogation?”

“It’s a question.”

“I feel interrogated.”

“Well that’s on you. Just answer the question an it’s all over.”

“Said the ‘bad’ cop.”

“Of the two of us, I am obviously the good cop.”

The quick firing squabble snapped quickly back and forth between them, each coming to the silent understanding the first not to answer to would lose whatever this impromptu competition was. And of course, neither of them was going to happen. Despite the mood they’d both started it in, smiles began to grow on their faces as the contest continued, and Tony started to take small steps closer with each of his quips. There was less than a hand’s breadth between them when the world of the small game was broken by a ringtone.

Loki’s gut twisted. There was only two people who knew the number to his phone, and one of them was stood before him, a look of curious concern on his features. He slowly pulled his phone from his pocket and clenched his jaw, looking to Tony apologetically before pressing it to his ear. There was no greeting. No pleasantries. Just one, simple rasping order before the phone went dead. 

“Office. Immediately.”


	18. Chapter 18

The lift felt smaller and darker than it had in a long time as Loki stood with his back against the steel wall, affecting a posture infinitely more relaxed than he felt, studying the dirty metal floor. 

He hadn’t hung around very long after the phonecall had ended. Tony had protested, even grabbed his arm in an attempt to stop him from going as be presented a hurried form of a ‘what’s the worst that could happen’ argument. But Loki had never found what out what Thanos's worst was and he didn’t intend to. After a bickering that almost became something more serious, Loki had tugged his wrist from Tony’s grip with a muttered apology and Tony’s expression lost its nonchalance. If Loki had read him right through his own panicked haze, he could have sworn there was trepidation in the man’s face. It was refreshing to see someone care. Even if it was in what may well be the last few moments of his life.

He shook his head. 

No. It wasn’t over just yet. He hadn’t come this far just to give up to some panicked assumption that he had been discovered. There was no proof of that, only what the fear in Loki’s gut was telling him. It was an unreliable source of information. No, if he was to get through this, he could not assume anything. If went to that man with his head-bowed and fearful, it would be enough to force them to suspect his failure even if they did not already know of it. But if he was to act confident, head held high, almost indignant at the very thought of being summoned like this? It might just be enough to put them off any scent. 

And if Thanos did know? Well, there would be nothing Loki could do about it. He might as well spend his last few moments donned in some measure of defiance. 

With that thought in mind, Loki lifted his chin as he felt the elevator begin to slow. Acting was what he did best. And only his best would be good enough if he wanted to step back into this lift. To head back to Stark Tower. An image of the anxious look on Tony’s face flickered across his mind. He didn’t want that to be the last time he saw the man. 

The ding echoed through the box. Show time. 

He strode out of the lift as the doors opened, long, confident steps that brought him to the desk of that man who was sat calmly typing. 

“What is the meaning of this?” Loki demanded as he walked, “I was in the middle of something.”

“Oh?” the man lifted his head slowly and he gave grotesque smile. Loki had to work to stop it from shattering his act immediately. It was still too early to tell what information Thanos may have. “Pray tell what has your schedule so full.”

Loki affected an irritated scowl, “I was at Stark Tower. Where do you think I have been spending my time of late?”

“I’m sure your time is being spent fruitfully as always,” the smile became knowing in a way Loki didn’t have to act to find distasteful, though it was no particular cause for alarm. It was no secret that he would sleep with targets if necessary. So far, this was no more than just the usual amount of goading and, as usual, Loki refused to rise to it. When it became clear the man would not get the reaction he desired, he went on, “What exactly were you doing at Stark Tower?”

A note of fear sounded in Loki’s mind. He would have to tread carefully here. Broad strokes, minimal detail. Nothing that could be verified, “I was with my estranged brother. Stark himself was in some meeting,” it was a lie just vague enough to explain himself without narrowing his scope too much. Loki searched the man’s gaunt features for any hint as to what he was thinking. 

“What meeting?” the man drawled, emotionlessly. 

“I’m afraid I don’t know,” Loki replied simply, folding his arms across his chest, “He didn’t deign to include me and now that I have disappeared suddenly, without explanation, before I could meet him afterwards, I likely will have missed any opportunity to find out without rousing unnecessary suspicion. Now, would you be so kind as to give me some hint as to what was so important that I drop everything and return here.” Restrained indignation was Loki’s shield and he clung to it. If there was one thing that he had learned about how this man operated, it was that he would be unable to withhold whatever upper hand he might have if he was irritated enough. 

The man tilted his head, “Your tone is growing awfully impudent, boy. Do not forget your last visit here,” he smirked, “And don’t forget your place here.” 

Loki pinched his lips together with a note of fear that was not entirely an act. It came with ghost of lingering pain across his cheekbone as he remembered what mild annoyance could lead to if it came about that the man had no information to hold over his head. Though, a simple strike across the cheek was something that Loki could handle now he didn’t have to hide it. It was only a little pain. Even attacks that usually happened between projects were manageable. Loki had come to the realization a long time ago that he was too valuable to risk accidentally killing. But mere violence was not the only tool in Thanos’s draw. 

 At the very beginning of all of this, during a time where Loki would make escape attempts at every opportunity, he had been defiant of the intermediary beatings that were used to try to chorale him into obedience. Thanos had shifted tactic. After yet another failed escape attempt, Loki had been brought back kicking and screaming and dealt with in the usual manner. Only this time, after he was dumped into the streets of New York, he returned to the grubby apartment he had been provided with to find the key he had been given no longer worked. The police were called by some anonymous tip off that he was in the building for less than legal reasons and he was quickly ejected. Following that, he found out that the cards he was given for food and any other requirements no longer worked. When he went to Thanos to demand an explanation, security would not allow him into the building. He was alone, homeless, and penniless in a foreign city. 

It was two weeks until Thanos eventually picked him up again, cowering from the rain and many other things under a bridge, cold, hungry, and scared. 

 Loki started to follow the rules after it became clear that this would not be a one off.

As though sensing where Loki’s memory had taken him, the man’s smile twitched eagerly larger and he leant forward on his desk, pulling a set of papers closer to him, glancing over the first page of them, “Now, you were called here because we have questions for you.”

Loki eyed him cautiously, stilling not seeing an indication of any glee the man would have of knowing something Loki didn’t, but he had to be sure, “Then ask them and let me return to my work.”

The man’s eyes snapped back up with an iciness that froze him in place, “My patience is fast running thin, Laufeyson.”

“Then ask your questions, and I will happily depart this place,” Loki snapped back, though he wasn’t sure why he continuing to push this. He had not seen anything to suggest he might have been discovered. Maybe he just needed to be sure. Or, maybe it was a confidence found in the fact that even if the familiar punishment was to be inflicted upon him, he knew a young, handsome billionaire who had given him a promise of shelter in which to lick his wounds. It was nice to have some lenience to find some small amount of joy in the man’s welling rage. 

But after a second or so, the man’s rage dissipated with a slow exhale of breath, “You are lucky, boy. Today, you are not the most incompetent fool in our employ.”

Loki stopped himself from commenting on the word ‘employ’, deciding he had pushed enough. It was time to actually focus on what other possible reason he could have been called here if not to be punished.

The man continued ignorant of Loki’s internal monologue, “What do you know of a company called Wakanda?” 

Loki allowed the surprise to ripple over his features, hoping it played as confusion. Had he been wrong? Did they know after all? No, it would have come up already...The implication hit him not long after that. Thanos was the problem Wakanda was facing. Of course, he should have seen it earlier...

It must have read how Loki had wanted, because the man sat back in his chair and gave that noise he apparently considered a chuckle, “I’m not surprised. You have never been one to lift your head to see the bigger picture at work.”

“I’m too busy trying to survive my own small corner of the show, I suppose,” Loki replied, bitterly, covering the new evaluation of the issues he faced that was going through in his mind. The first thing that snapped into focus was the new level of risk to Tony if he was going insist on involving himself in Wakanda’s apparent problems.  He would have to put something in place to protect him from this.

The man narrowed his already beady eyes as he peaked his fingers in front of him, “Yes I suppose you are. Wakanda is a company in our crosshairs, based in Africa, cited as one of the Times 100 biggest rising stars globally.”

Loki raised an eyebrow. He could see where this was going a mile off and he wasn’t going accept it all too eagerly, “And what has this to do with me? I would find it taxing to undertake two projects simultaneously even if they shared a continent. Though I would be willing exchange one for another if you were willing to return my passport to me.”

The man bared his yellowed teeth in a grin, “Don’t be ridiculous Laufeyson, your passport shall remain with us. You won’t be going anywhere.  Quite the opposite in fact.”

Loki remained silent. He already knew what was coming next. 

“The operative we have in Wakanda has taken the rather brave decision to inform us that they may be compromised and that Wakanda has gone to Stark Industries for assistance,” he fixed Loki with a searching gaze, “Were you aware of this?”

Loki shook his head slowly, “I was not. Stark rarely shares too much of his day to day business dealings with me. I am not exactly his business partner. His external contacts have not been the focus of my work there.”

“Then perhaps you should expand your scope,” the man drawled. 

Loki snorted, “You want me to not only continue my own work, but start some investigation into this Wakanda business to monitor Stark’s assistance in this matter. I don't see why the incompetence of some other operative should hinder my work.” 

“They have yet to fail and we’d very much like to keep it from doing so,” the man replied, simply, still grinning, “I cannot imagine a more well-placed man to keep that from happening than you.”

“And I presume this is not up for debate?”

The man allowed his silence to answer for him. 

Loki exhaled through his nose after a moment and glanced off to the side, taking a brief moment to collect himself. There was no getting out of this. Not right now. But there was something he might be able to get for himself. A silver lining to this ever-darkening cloud. He looked back to the man. “Very well, I’ll assist in recovering whatever situation your operative has found themselves in. But I cannot focus truly on two projects at once. If I am to do this, I will need more time on Stark himself.”

The man considered him unreadably for a long time before picking up the receiver of a desk phone tucked away behind the monitor of his computer, “We shall see…”

****

Tony was half-way down the page when he realized that, once again, he hadn’t actually read a single one of the words on it. He snorted and tossed it back onto his desk and rubbed his eyes. It had been three hours since Loki had made Tony promise not have him followed in any way before disappearing to deal with whatever it was that had him so spooked. It was something to do with his mysterious ‘employer’ which was enough to have Tony just a little worried. Plus the phonecall occurring immediately following the meeting with T’Challa and Shuri to discuss a security breach felt a little too coincidental for Tony’s liking. A sentiment Loki apparently shared, judging by the anxiety that had swept through the man when he had looked at his cellphone. What if they had found out through Wakanda that Loki wasn’t exactly playing their game anymore? That would be on Tony. He was the one who asked him to get involved, despite Loki arguing the opposite. Had he just sold Loki up the river? 

Tony had kept his promise, despite how hard concentrating on anything was becoming the longer that Loki was gone. All he could picture was the bruise across his face that night. It didn’t take a genius to work out its origins. He picked up his cell phone for what felt like the hundredth time and to check to see whether there had been any response to the message he’d sent an hour and half ago. And as usual, there was no sign of any response. 

He pursed his lips and tapped his phone lightly on his desk as he fought the growing desire to track down the GPS in Loki’s phone. He owed it to Loki not to break this promise as well, especially if it was the Wakanda meeting that had landed him in it in the first place. 

After a stretched out internal debate, he had just scooted his chair closer to the computer monitor set up on his desk when there was a knock at his door. As per usual, Pepper didn’t wait for him to acknowledge her before ducking her head around the door. 

“Loki’s back,” she said lightly, likely not understanding the significance what she’d just said, “He’s asked if you’ve got a spare five minutes.”

“I can probably find five minutes,” Tony replied as nonchalantly as possible, but he was already pushing his chair back from the desk and standing. 

A wave of relief washed over him as Pepper stepped aside and Loki appeared from behind her, barely a hair out of place. He looked as good as he did when he’d arrived earlier that day. He smiled his thanks to Pepper who returned them politely and left them alone.

Tony was already half way across the office when the door closed, “And where have you been? You’ve been gone three hours. Do you know that? What? It takes an hour to get to your boss’s office? Didn’t feel the need to answer my message or anything huh? You alright? What did they want?”

Loki crossed the room so they met halfway, “Tony, calm down,” he spoke seriously, but there was a reassuring amusement on his face. 

Tony’s gaze ticked over him, evaluating his state, “Are you okay?”

Loki gave a slow, uncertain nod, “For now, whether that will continue I can’t say.”

“You know I don’t like your riddles, I assume you’re going to tell me what happened,” Tony stated, turning back to his desk now that he was satisfied that there was no physical violence that warranted immediate retribution. 

Loki followed a couple of steps behind and took the seat across the desk as Tony sat in his office chair, the amusement had wilted somewhat, “I have some new insight into your Wakanda problem.”

Tony raised an eyebrow, “Oh yeah? One of your old colleagues I presume?”

Loki nodded, “It would appear so, though I don’t many of them, so I’m afraid it isn’t too much help to your friends. Though I can warn you that they know that Wakanda has come to you for help.”

“How’d you get away with meeting with T’Challa and Shuri this morning, then?” Tony asked, quashing that worry in his gut. Now was not the time. 

“They don’t know that I am involved,” Loki replied, though not with the level of relaxation that Tony would have expected his continued discretion to come with. He licked his lips before continuing, “Which has brought about yet another complication in my life, as though I don’t have enough. They want me to hinder your efforts to assist them.”

Tony hummed tunelessly, “So you've graduated to double agent now huh? Congrats.”

Loki snorted, “Glad to see you’re taking this seriously.”

“I am taking it seriously,” Tony replied, hoping his forced lightheartedness would help quell whatever fears Loki apparently had. 

“You need to back off this, Tony,” Loki stated, fixing him with a grim expression that Tony couldn’t help but mirror, “If their operation fails there and they blame you, they would not be above coming after you for it.”

“What? Would they send another one of you?” Tony quipped, then smirked playfully, “You know, I could probably work with that.”

Loki didn’t share his mirth, “It wouldn’t be nearly as subtle as someone like me. I can probably work out a way to leave you unaffected after I have left, but I can’t protect you from what they would do to you if they blame you for this.”

Tony faltered a little, frowning slightly, “I never took you for the protective type...”

Loki opened his mouth to respond then paused and glanced away, looking almost embarrassed, “...I’ve not had reason to be until recently.”

“...I can’t turn them down if they ask me, L,” Tony said quietly, after a moment, deciding that not addressing the comment was probably the best way to preserve the little touch of warmth that came with it, “You’ve got to know that, right?”

Loki nodded, “I suspected as much...”

Tony leant forward to rest his elbows on the desk, moving his head to try to draw Loki’s gaze back to him, “Hey, we’ll figure it out, ok?”

When Loki met his gaze, there was a satisfying note of confidence in his eyes as they flicked between Tony’s. Apparently finding what he was looking for, he sighed, “I do actually have some good news.”

Tony sat back in his chair, “What’s that?” 

“I convinced them that I wouldn’t be able to both hinder you and convince you hand over your deepest secrets simultaneously,” a victorious smile flickered into life on his face, “They’ve given me more time.”

Tony blinked in surprise, "How much more?”

Loki shrugged as though this process was suddenly easy and Tony realized that this was probably the most long-lasting smile Tony had ever seen on the man’s face, “If I can navigate this minefield successfully, I have until the new year before they expect me to deliver anything.”

Tony narrowed his eyes as he absorbed the news, trying to convince himself he was happy because Loki had found some success in his continued endeavor to escape his crappy situation, and not just because they suddenly had more time together. Though the concept was not exactly lost on him. He sat forward again, “So, we’ve got just over four months to come up with a plan to get you out of this, while making sure they stay convinced that you’re stealing from me, as well as stopping them from finding out you’re not actually stopping me from helping Wakanda and have, in fact, already helped them yourself?” Tony smirked and paused for effect, “Game on.”


	19. Chapter 19

Tony took a slow exhale as he went over the schematics hovering in the air of the workshop, trying to see whether there was anything he’d missed. There wasn’t anything obvious, but then again, he’d not had to design a particle accelerator before and there wasn't exactly plans for them just loitering on the internet. The last thing he wanted to do was spend a month pulling it together, only for it to break immediately. Work had been slower than usual in the two weeks since the new set up with Loki had been established, only because the man was not on board with Tony’s poor excuse for a work/life balance. The look Tony had been given when Loki found out that he’d spent their weekend in each other’s doghouses hammering a concrete wall for 36 hours straight was almost enough to break the wall on its own. It was like having a live-in Nanny. Albeit an exceptionally handsome and intelligent one that made up for the chastising in more ways than one. 

It had been less than 24 hours from the first chat with T’Challa before the request for further help came through to Tony. Not that T’Challa had been asking for  _Tony’s_  help per se. T’Challa had specifically requested the help of the man he knew as Vogel, the security expert extraordinaire, which Tony had agreed to on his behalf. That didn’t go down well with the man himself. The argument that followed almost ended the whole situation there and then. Tony made a mental note that he would never do that to Loki again. Agreeing to something on his behalf clearly had a bit too much of a taste of his current master for him to be all too happy with it.

But corporate espionage was not something that Tony had ever been involved in, until recently of course. He wouldn’t even know where to start in trying remotely attempting to unpick the work of a corporate spy thousands of miles away. It was Loki’s wheelhouse, plain and simple. Besides, if Loki did this, maybe it could help convince himself that was not the monster that he seemed to think he was. Tony secured written agreement from T’Challa that Loki’s (or Vogel as he was known) identity be kept a secret from all but T’Challa and Shuri. It wasn’t hard to persuade them that a man who spent his career thwarting the attempts of criminals might have made some enemies. It was just enough to convince Loki this wasn’t the equivalent of signing his own warrant. 

In what could only be described as a morbid interest, Tony had been curious to see how Loki would operate, a peek behind the curtain to the path that had led him to Stark Tower in the first place. At least that had been the explanation he had given when Loki had caught him flicking through the notes he’d made. What he didn’t tell him was that Tony was still determined to find out who was holding Loki’s leash, since every time Tony even brought up the topic, it shut down any conversation they had been having with nothing more than a ‘you know better than to ask’. Not that the notes had told him anything, they were so vague they were basically written in code. It seemed Loki operated almost entirely by memory and loose pieces of paper. An artifact of his previous life, Loki had described it. His employers had never provided a computer of any sort, likely because they didn’t want to risk a trail of evidence being saved to it. 

Loki had requested information from T’Challa like site layout, office locations, even the social medias of those people at risk. And for a little while, he was making do with just his smart phone on which to browse the information.  Once Tony learned of that, he sourced a laptop for the guy to work from, if only for simplicity. Loki had declined at first, a familiar suspicion in his eyes at being handed a piece of Stark technology he most likely would have fed right back to his bosses a month ago. ‘Trust was a two-way street take it or leave it’, Tony had said calmly, leaving the laptop on the table on top of the piles of notes spread haphazardly across it. There was nothing on there that would be of use to anyone but the very fact that Loki would question why Tony was trusting him with it was a stark reminder of just how he had likely been treated over the last few years. 

A regular routine formed in almost no time at all. Tony still had a company to run and Loki had a double agent ploy to pull off. Tony returned to a loose form of his old schedule, spending four days shut away in his workshop and one in his office. Loki would be found somewhere not too far away head bent over the laptop, usually in total silence. Since the guy was now essentially a subconsultant for Stark Industries, Tony had said he would prefer him to work from the building, but of course made it clear he wouldn’t make him. Loki had been amenable to the concept though, acknowledging that this whole thing would go a lot easier with Tony’s continued help in communicating with Wakanda and maintaining the ruse of hindering Stark Industries’ efforts in assistance. 

Loki was also happy to continue to adhere to Rule 2 that Tony had given, as part his ongoing efforts to prove himself trustworthy. The office days weren’t a problem, there was more than enough room in there for two people to work. Even if he did have to make himself scarce during meetings that Tony had, he was content to wait out the usually short times with Steve and Pepper in the adjoining room. The problem was, the guy wasn’t allowed in the workshop, naturally. So, Tony had had to bend his rule a little while he worked on the ‘Heart’ and he set up a workspace for Loki in the penthouse where he would spend his day under Jarvis’s watchful eye. The system worked well enough.

Loki had known better than to ask too much about what Tony was doing in the workshop. Though he had come close only two days into this routine, when he had demanded to know what it was that Tony was banging on so god damn incessantly or else he would go down there and find out for himself. After sourcing a pair of headphones and agreeing to no more than four hours of hammering a day, the subject was dropped.

In the beginning, Loki had insisted on holding on to some part of his former life, despite Tony repeatedly telling him that he could just stay in the Tower if he wanted. It would get to late afternoon or early evening and Loki would announce his departure, returning the next day always at 7:30am to continue what he was doing. Tony had tried not notice his nightly absence too much, but it wasn’t easy

That changed the weekend after T’Challa had first come to him for assistance, just a few days into this new routine. 

Loki had reluctantly agreed to come to Stark Tower for the ‘check-in with his employer’ that he had explained happened around once a week. Tony had argued it made sense for the two of them to work out what could be said together because who better to point out meaningless tidbits of information than the target himself? After a little more persuasion, he had even let Tony sit in the room while he made the call, demanding absolute and complete silence throughout, no matter what was said.

In the time that Tony had known him, he had never seen Loki on edge in the way that he was on the phone to whoever it was. He was stood with his back leaning against the glass wall of the penthouse, head bowed, shoulders tense, and one arm folded across his chest, gripping the side of his t-shirt in a fist. Tony had watched in the silence he had promised, despite the queasy feeling his stomach as he listened to the half conversation. He had hoped to maybe glean a little about this employer through this, but Loki’s half of the conversation was made up of nothing but the information they had decided on and just a series of curt acknowledgements or ‘I’m not’ and ‘I won’t’. It felt strange hearing Loki talk about him in 3rd person, using only his last name. So unfamiliar, like a stranger talking about him. 

Once the call was over, Loki’s shoulders had visibly dropped a couple of inches as he relaxed and he assured Tony that they were none the wiser of their game. Tony had tried a joke to test the waters and when all he got in return was a tired smile, Tony had all but barred him from going back to his own apartment. If Loki had had it his way, he’d likely be halfway across the country by now, but Tony had been the one to hold him back. The least he could do was look after him when he had to put himself back in contact with whoever it was he was trying to run from. 

Loki rarely left after that, heading back to his own apartment for only an hour at a time to change clothes or pick something up he thought he would need. It only took a couple more days before he apparently gave up on the pretense all together and just brought a bag of his clothes to the penthouse. Tony had spent a fair amount of time rummaging through it, determined to find whatever that brightly colored item of clothing was that Loki had alluded on one of the few ‘dates’ they had actually had. A sadly fruitless endeavor. Though, not that that stopped Loki from continuing to tease about what it could be. 

It was almost two weeks before Tony realized just how domestic the whole situation had become. Their days were spent working in relative silence, communicating only to quibble over who’s turn it was to make coffee or for Loki to remind Tony that eating is what humans do to survive. The evenings were split between going out to drinks with someone or other, or just spent lounging in the penthouse, just talking. Now that he wasn’t so cautious about what he could and couldn’t reveal about himself, Tony found Loki to be surprisingly talkative and almost scarily intelligent. Between the two of them, an evening could come and go without either of them realizing that the topic had not shifted. Loki could talk for hours about the history of his country, myth, legend, geography, and culture. And surprising even himself, Tony would listen, fascinated to hear of this place that Loki clearly missed, even if he described it as cold, desolate wasteland. Though Tony did have to admit, he often wasn’t listening to the words, only Loki’s voice.

Loki was also capable of understanding almost any concept set out in front of him. Having established that he had more than a basic understanding of programming, something Tony wasn’t sure he wanted to know the origins of, Tony began explaining what had gone into some of his older technology. And Loki had grasped it faster than some of his own engineers, even pointing out a flaw or two in some of the plans. Flaws that had been fixed in newer iterations of the devices in question, but the fact that Loki had picked up on them based on nothing but a few base examples was incredible. It was one of those points that highlighted that this could have been something substantial, if only they had met in a different life. Still, that depressing thought wasn’t going to stop Tony enjoying whatever this was for what little time they had together. Even the odd evening when Loki would drag him back to the ice rink for an evening of torturous lessons. 

Their nights...well, their nights were spent energetically, and after they were both satisfied, they would collapse together in a level of comfort that Tony had not felt in a very long time. He was beginning to think Loki might have known what he was talking about after all when it came to dealing with nightmares. Of course, they hadn’t just stopped, but waking up to Loki’s gentle touch pulling him into his arms, murmuring soft comforts, it certainly made going back to sleep more than a little bit easier. 

Weirdly enough, the best thing about this whole new situation was that it seemed as though Loki was beginning to find some small measure of happiness in it as well. Every step of the way, Tony tried to make sure that he had a choice, or at least explained the reasoning behind everything he was doing. He wasn’t sure to what extent his feelings were matched, emotions were one of those topics Loki tended to shy away from. But he seemed happy here, and that was enough.  

Tony smiled to himself as he spun the schematics in the air, admiring the work he had done, despite new found distractions. 

“What d’ya think Jarvis?” Tony asked, tilting his head at the hologram.

“My calculations show that this design would work, in theory.”

“In theory?” Tony repeated with a slight frown. 

“I can’t compensate for human error, sir.”

“I mistranslate one little sequence of code and you never let me forget it...” Tony grumbled under his breath, lifting his hands up to the hologram and moving them apart from each other so he could peer a little closer, “Well then I guess the only way to compensate for human error is to see what a human does hm?”

“Correct.”

“Well then, tomorrow, we move into phase 2!”

****

Loki sat where he always was, at the desk that Tony had set up for him, resting his head on his fist as he frowned at the laptop screen which showed a rather darkened aerial image of a small town. The process of trying to quietly unpick the Wakanda problem was cautious and slow. It consisted of going over information, going back to T’Challa with questions and updates, going over the new information, offering tidbits of advice, and rise and repeat. Thanos’s operative over there was one of his better ones. Hard to pin down. For now, all Loki could do was offer a number of potential ‘next steps’ they could take in the hopes that T’Challa would be able to head them off. Eventually, Loki would have to talk to those targeted by the operative directly, but he wanted to put that off as long as possible. The last thing he needed was for the involvement of a man called ‘Vogel’ to get back to Thanos through this operative. They would put the pieces together faster than Loki could pack. Not that that would take too long now that he had basically moved into Stark Tower, he thought idly. 

Relationships were never something that Loki had ever had much interest in nor time for. Even before New York, there was never anyone that held Loki’s attention long enough for the word to be applicable. And so, Loki had spent a lot of time not otherwise occupied by either Wakanda or planning his own departure trying to work out just how he seemed to have stumbled almost blindly into one with Tony. A man who had been a target not so long ago, but had so quickly seen through his disguise and arguably caused Loki more problems than anyone other than Thanos himself. And yet, here he was, working quietly in Tony’s lounge while he waited almost eagerly for the man himself to ascend from the workshop below.

The only explanation Loki had come upon was that it was nothing more than an infatuation with someone who had shown him a modicum of compassion. Just a sad reflection of the low that he had reached. It would pass soon enough. 

But the work routine they shared had lapsed into something much less professional, Loki found himself rarely leaving Stark Tower, and he found himself enjoying everything about the man. His refusal to be handed anything, the apparently bottomless vat of reasons he could draw from to avoid ice-skating, coupled with the determination to excel at it once he was there. His vast, and perpetually active mind so endlessly observant, Loki was surprised he’d managed to continue his ruse as long as he did. And, of course, the compassion in him that only seemed emboldened by the traumatic events he had suffered through.

As Loki learned more about him and that curious feeling grew, less than two weeks later it had become almost impossible to write them off as just a passing preoccupation. Not that he had told Tony any of this introspection. It wasn’t because he didn’t think the feelings were reciprocated, Tony had made it clear from the beginning where he stood on that matter. Rather, it was that the knowledge that this whole, blissful situation was nothing more than an interlude in his otherwise dismal life. One that would be over soon enough, and what was the point of acknowledging these feelings if they would be irrelevant before the year was out. Besides, who was Loki to deserve any of this from a man such as Tony. It was best not to encourage any of these feelings, lest Tony not come to his senses and realize just what kind of person he was wasting his energy on. 

But that conscious decision to suppress admission of whatever this feeling was did not stop the associated need to impress the man. Loki had thrown himself into this Wakanda issue with a determination that surprised even himself given the risk it presented to him. But Tony had trusted him with this, with a piece of Stark Technology, and with the ability to work largely unaccompanied. Loki would not let that trust go to waste. The memories Tony would have of him after he was gone would be good, he would make sure of that. 

The way that the workspace was set up meant that his back was to the door to the workshop. Loki wasn’t sure whether it was deliberate or not but it did mean that the only indication that Tony was still alive in the time that he was locked down there was the muffled hiss of a secondary door opening somewhere behind it. It was roughly four seconds between whatever was down there and the first door. A fact that Loki had picked up on instinct, a remnant of the former life that had him account for every movement within a building should he ever need to venture off somewhere within a certain time limit. 

"One, two, three, and,” Loki counted softly under his breath, not looking away from the screen and pointed to the door in lieu for reaching four. When it didn’t open, Loki scowled and swiveled the chair he had been given to look at it. 

“Not as predictable as you’d like hm?” Tony called from beyond the door, then pushed it open, a knowing smirk on his face, I noticed you doing that the other day.”

“It’s a force of habit,” Loki replied apologetically. 

Tony gave a shrug as he came through and closed the door behind him, “What else have you timed, out of curiosity?”

Loki hesitated then looked back to his laptop, not entirely sure he wanted to see the disappointment on Tony’s face as he answered, “Sixteen seconds from the entrance door to the lifts. Thirty-four seconds from the elevator to Thor’s office. Thirty-six from the lift to your office. I haven’t been anywhere else.”

Tony hmm’d as he crossed to his coffee machine, sounding not nearly as bothered about Loki creating a mental map of his building as he would have assumed, “Is that something I should worry about?” he asked casually. The sound of the coffee machine whirring into life coupled the question, “Not from you, I might add, I mean generally.”

Loki turned to where he was stood at the coffee machine, eyebrow raised, “You want me to score them?”

“If you like,” Tony was watching his coffee pour, hands stuffed in the pockets of his dust coated trousers. For a man who worked with what was likely incredibly delicate electronics, he did not seem to keep the cleanest of workshops, “If you’re seeing something that would be an opportunity for someone who isn’t going to fall for my dashing good looks and give up their nefarious life, I’d like to know.”

Loki had opened his mouth to reply then smiled at the end of Tony’s comment, “Who said anything about falling for you?”

“No one,” Tony took the coffee from the machine, “So what’s the verdict on my travel times?”

“They don’t have an objective good or bad, in that way, just something to be aware of I suppose,” Loki replied as Tony crossed to the desk, his drink in one hand, “No, I’m fine for a coffee, thank you for offering though,” he said playfully, looking up at him as he stood over his chair.

“Oh, and how many have you made yourself today?” Tony cast a pointed glance at the empty mug next to the laptop, then held Loki’s gaze, daring him to answer as he took a sip of his coffee. When Loki stayed silent, he moved his attention to what was on the laptop screen, “What’s that?”

Loki turned back to the screen, as Tony moved around behind him to rest his non-coffee arm on Loki’s shoulder, in a casually familiar way that was the norm for Tony. It had taken a little while to get used to the level of casual contact, but now that he was, Loki found comfort in it. He gestured absently at the town on the screen as Tony watched over his shoulder, “It’s a candidate for suitable backwater to disappear into when I take my leave.”

Tony leant forward a little to get a better look at the dingy image, causing man’s bristled cheek brushed his own. Loki didn’t move away. Tony assessed the poor satellite photo for a second, “Hm. Looks cold, desolate, and depressing. Perfect for you.” With that conclusion given, Tony leant back a little but didn’t complete remove his arm from where it rested on Loki’s shoulder, “Pretty crappy imaging though. I can probably arrange a flyover there if you want a better look?”

Once again, Loki marveled the situation he found himself in. He had an ally who had not only the means, but the will to literally move satellites to help him. The most unusual thing was, that Tony could not seem to fathom how amazing these tools were. After a moment’s deliberation, he answered, “It would be useful know that it’s still there. The date of this image is off by almost a decade.”

“Sure, I’ll ask the guys downstairs to sort it, just tell me whereabouts it is tomorrow,” Tony replied as though it was the most normal thing in the world, “Can probably get it through in a couple of days.”

“Thank you,” Loki said earnestly, to which Tony gave his usual 'don’t mention it’ shrug and wandered back to the coffee machine, taking Loki’s empty mug with him, “How is the demolition progressing?”

“Well, I have good news and bad news,” Tony replied, starting the machine, “The good news is that I’ve finished stage one. So, sledgehammer to concrete is no more. And I was thinking we should go out to dinner to celebrate. I’ve made reservations at that new place just off Broadway.”

“Well, that sounds good, but if you want to go out to dinner you will have to get changed,” Loki said as he stood to join Tony at the coffee machine. Even if he had goaded him into making one, he felt bad having him bring it to him, “You look like...” he paused and pretended to think, “Well you look like you’ve been hammering on a concrete wall for four hours.”

“Clearly you don’t understand fashion, all the kids are into the construction site look these days,” Tony quipped back.

“Name three people under eighteen that you even know,” Loki replied taking the coffee.

Tony held up a finger, “Peter Parker,” he faltered but refused to break eye contact even as Loki raised an eyebrow at him, “...And two of his friends.”

“Uh huh...” Loki smiled into his mug and decided to allow him this victory, “You said there was bad news.”

“Well stage two also involves a lot of hammering on metal so realistically nothing is changing except tone,” Tony flashed a quick smile. 

Loki sighed, “Oh good.”

“Knew you’d like that,” Tony finished his coffee with one quick swig, “Oh, I actually did need to ask you something. A friend of mine called, he’s in town and wanted to meet up, would you mind if he joined us tonight?”

Loki frowned, “I’m sure you are more than able to have dinner with your friend without my being there. That’s not a problem, I still have an apartment I can go to.”

Tony scrunched his face up in a way that made it clear he knew Loki wasn’t going to be totally on board with what he said next, “I actually would like you to meet him.”

Loki hesitated a second, then asked, “Why?”

Tony seemed to struggle with the question. His mouth worked as though trying to form an answer for a second then looked away, “Does it matter why? I just want you meet him.”

“How could it not matter why, Tony?” Loki answered, a little disbelieving that he still wasn’t grasping the idea of ‘low-profile’, “And the fact you’re being evasive isn’t helping. Who are they?”

“Just an old friend of mine/ Army guy. He’s not in town very long apparently,” Tony shrugged and looked away, “I dunno, I just wanted you meet him.”

“Last time I met one of your friends, I was strong-armed into hunting down my Wakanda equivalent,” a look of guilt swept over Tony’s face and Loki sighed, “I apologize, strong-armed wasn’t the right word...All I’m saying is that historically, those of your friends that I have met have not exactly helped my situation. You must be able to see where my trepidation comes from?”

With a deep breath, Tony nodded looking back to him, “Yeah, I get it.”

Loki attempted a small smile and his eyebrow twitched up a little, “I am sorry, Tony, that this can’t be just what I suspect you have in mind.”

“Hey, what have I told you about apologizing for your whole messed up situation,” Tony chastised, poking him in the chest playfully, “Nothing to for sorry about. I knew what I was signing up for.”

“Then you think you can survive an evening without me?” Loki asked, doing his best to hide the fact that in truth, he would take dinner with Tony and this mysterious army guy over a night without him, but he still had to be practical. Don’t take anymore stupid risks.  

“I actually think I’m looking forward to a night where I don’t have to be back before midnight or else you’ll turn into a pumpkin,” Tony said, his mood immediately covered in that mask of sarcasm he tended to wear when he was feeling vulnerable. 

“I don’t think you’ve ever read Cinderella,” Loki’s eyes creased in amusement. 

Tony just wafted the idea away as he turned on his heels and began to walk towards his bedroom, “I’d better get ready for my night on the town,” he announced over-dramatically then stopped and looked over his shoulder, almost indignant to find Loki not following, “You coming for a shower or what?”

After a moment of defiance, Loki grinned and followed. 


	20. Chapter 20

“So, I hear you’re dating now.” 

It was a statement rather than a question. One that Tony had been ready for. If anything, he was surprised that it had come so late in the evening, only being raised in the conversation now that the desserts were almost finished. The majority of the dinner had just been catching up, since it had been nearly six months since the two had last seen each other. Being an Air Force Colonel didn’t grant too much time off.  

Tony didn’t glance up from his dessert as he replied, “You got people spying on me again?” 

“Twitter,” Rhodey answered, too used to Tony’s demeanor to be fooled by his nonchalance, “Have you not seen the hashtag?” 

Tony looked up at that. He hadn’t had his own hashtag since he went off the reservation almost two years ago. He’d be pleased with himself if he wasn’t acutely aware how not pleased Loki would be if he found out. The poorly concealed amusement on his friend’s face told him enough to know he wasn’t bluffing, “Aren’t we at war with someone?” 

“Almost always.” 

“Then how have you found time for tweeting?” 

“The Air Force has twitter now...” Rhodey answered bitterly, immensely dismayed at the concept. “You want me to tell you what the hashtag is?” 

Tony had whipped his phone out of his pocket before Rhodey had finished the first sentence and held it loosely in one hand, peering at the holographic image of a screen that displayed a couple of inches over the phone itself. Rhodey raised an unimpressed eyebrow, once again, too used to him to be fooled by the very obvious attempt to show off new technology. Besides, the Department of Defense still had one or two outstanding contracts with Stark Industries that hadn’t yet lapsed since he had de-weaponized the company. Tony wouldn’t be surprised if they had some of this technology anyway. “Hey, would you look at that. I’ve got more followers than the world’s most powerful military,” he scrolled idly through the feed, not taking any of it in, “You know if we went to war, my guys could beat your guys.” 

“How many of your guys have F-15s?”  

Tony eyed him over the top of the yellow tinted glasses he was wearing, “Depends how much forewarning I get.” 

“None. It’s war.”  

“That sounds like a breach of the Geneva Convention.” 

“Never bothered you before?” Rhodey retorted.  

The comment stung a little. But thankfully less so than it may have done a year ago. He had reached a point where he had accepted what he used to be. He was turning around his legacy. He sniffed and looked back to the hovering image of the twitter feed.  

“It’s StarKrossedLovers,” Rhodey said before the moment had time to get heavy, “The hashtag.” 

Tony frowned, “That’s terrible.” 

Rhodey smiled, “Well, I tried to get TallStarkandHandsome going but it wouldn’t stick.” 

“Thank God for small miracles, hm?” Tony muttered, already having entered the hashtag into the search bar.  

Sure enough, a plethora of tweets popped into view. They were largely just people commenting that they had seen Tony out with ‘that guy again’ at whatever bar or restaurant he had Loki had happened to be at that evening. If you were to put them all together it would be a fairly accurate map of their movements over the last couple of weeks. There weren’t many with pictures, luckily, and none of those had been able to get a clear shot of Loki’s face. One tweet that was more than just idle observation was one of the oldest, where someone had gone on a short rant about how they had been ‘threatened by Stark’s new guy and his body guard’. Immediately, Tony flashed back to that evening before everything blew up when he had seen Loki talking sternly to a guy in the crowd of a bar where Thor had backed him up quickly. He couldn’t help but smirk to himself a little.  

 After a minute of perusing, something stood out as out of the ordinary. There was unusual number of people claiming that their tweets with the hashtag had been deleted. Too many to be a coincidence. Did Loki know about this? If he did, then why did he not come to him about it?  

“So, is it true?” Rhodey asked, breaking through Tony’s internal monologue. 

Tony flipped the phone back into the palm of his hand dissipating the screen, making a note to look into it later as he turned his attention back to his friends, “You jealous?” 

Rhodey maintained a neutral expression, “Concerned.” 

Tony scowled, “Why? He's perfectly fin-” 

“For him.” 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Tony replied, deadpan, “I’m a catch.” 

“Oh yeah,” Rhodey leant his arm on the table, “According to twitter, he popped up, what, a month ago?” 

Tony shrugged, “Sure.” 

“What’s his last name?” there was a playful glint his eye as he asked, anticipating a game he had high hopes that he could win.  

“I’m not playing twenty questions,” Tony said, with a seriousness that he hoped would be perceived as more than just sarcasm.  

“Why not?” Rhodey frowned, unused to having Tony shut down a conversation so directly.  

Tony licked his lips as the impulse to tell him everything suddenly shot to the forefront of his mind. Rhodey was his best friend and had been for almost a decade. He’d been there through the worst time of his life, he was literally the man who had dragged him from hell. Surely, he could trust him with this? No, he realized, it wasn’t about trusting Rhodey, that was above reproach. What wasn’t, was betraying the trust of Loki. A man so starved of affection that he had argued for nearly forty minutes as to why he shouldn’t be allowed a laptop. A man who’s only opportunity to escape a life he despised, currently rested with Tony. A man who was only just beginning to open up to him truly and Tony knew it wouldn’t take much to shut him down again. As much as he had done in the past, Loki deserved a chance to make amends and the small comfort Tony would find in confiding in Rhodey was not worth jeopardizing that.  

Rhodey knowing could wait. If he and Loki could pull off the next few months properly, Tony could tell him then, happy in the knowledge that Loki was safe somewhere in a dingy little town like the one he had been considering that afternoon, looking forward to seeing him again one day.  

“It’s complicated,” Tony said eventually, wrinkling his nose, trying to inject a light-heartedness to the comment.  

But Rhodey seemed to get the idea, shrugged and sat back in his chair, “Suit yourself. I’m sure he’ll learn to handle you eventually.” 

Tony gave a small smile, unsure of how much Loki would be able to learn in three and half months.  

“I actually came to invite you somewhere,” Rhodey reached into the jacket that was draped over the back of his chair and pulled out an envelope, laying it on the table in front of Tony. 

“Haven’t we just been over my relationship status?” Tony smirked, picking up the envelop and ripping open the top with his finger, “Always wanting what you can’t have huh?” 

“You wish,” Rhodey replied, smiling, “No, it’s a dinner, with a capital D. They're giving me a medal for hauling your sorry ass home from Afghanistan.” 

Tony paused in pulling the invitation out of the envelope, sparing Rhodey a brief glance as the faintest twists in his stomach as the word sounded a number of mental warning bells. He took a slow breath and swallowed the feeling, covering it with a muttered, “Better late than never I guess...” 

“Yeah, you’re telling me,” Rhodey was watching him with a look of mild concern, “I wouldn’t have brought it up but they want you there as a guest of honor.” 

“That so...” Tony was running his eyes over the invitation, if only to have something, anything to distract his mind. It had been nearly two years, he should be ok with this now... 

Rhodey sensed his hesitation, “Hey,” Tony looked up at him, “You know you can decline. I know you’re still going through some stuff.” 

Tony took a deep breath and folded the paper up, tucked back into the envelope and slipped it into the inside pocket of his jacket, “Send Rogers or Pep the details. I’ll see if I can fit it in.” 

Rhodey’s lips twitched up into a one-sided smile, clearly happy that Tony was at least considering it, “Sure. There’s a plus one on there as well, if you want to bring your guy. Can I know his first name?” 

A buzz against the table drew Tony’s attention to where he’d laid his phone to one side, “His name’s Loki...and speaking of,” he slid his finger over the screen of the phone to open the message before smiling to himself a little and looking back to Rhodey, “It looks like he’s gotten bored on his own. Fancy meeting him?”  

It would only be later that Tony had realized that the disquiet in his mind at the thought of Afghanistan had dissipated the instant Loki’s name had appeared on his phone.  

****** 

The bar Loki had suggested was one that the he and Tony had come to a number of times in the last couple of weeks, not too far from Stark Tower itself. The building could be seen from the street outside the bar’s entrance, standing vigilant over the city like a bright beacon just a little bit lighter than the dull, oppressing yellow that seeped from its surroundings.  

After he had left Tony to get ready for his dinner date, Loki had only been on his own for a couple of hours before he realized how much he now disliked his own company. When he was with Tony, it was as though the constant nagging thoughts and self-hatred was quietened. Whether it was a factor being near the man himself or a side effect of the constant hammering, he had yet to discern. However as soon as he set foot in the old apartment once again, the thoughts returned.  

Thoughts such as: Why he was doing this? What happens if this goes wrong? What happens to Thor? To Tony? And even if he pulled it off, then what? Wallow in self-pity in some desolate town and hope Thanos forgets about him? That would never work. What was the point even trying? It's not like he deserved another chance anyway. He could have given himself up at any point but he didn’t. Because he’s a coward and monster who would rather lie and cheat and ruin than face the consequences of his actions.  

Loki shook his head and rubbed the bridge of his nose with his thumb and forefinger to try to dissipate the thoughts. Things felt so simple when Tony was around... 

He ducked down the side alley by the bar to wait for Tony and whoever this friend was. They shouldn’t be too long, but he didn’t want to spend too much time loitering on the sidewalk while he tried to clear his head, too many people, too many curious faces. 

 The alley wasn’t large , only about seven feet across ending abruptly less than twenty feet further down. It was just a storage area for dumpsters belonging to the surrounding buildings. Loki could just about make out a stocky homeless man digging around in one of the dumpsters not too far away but didn’t pay him too much mind.  

He leant his back against the cool bricks of the building and ran a hand through his hair, oddly keen to make a good impression on this friend, something that required a level head. Tony’s memories of this whole time would be good. And that meant those of his friends too.  

“Hey,” a voice called down the alleyway, interrupted his thoughts and Loki looked up to find the homeless man had stopped what he had been doing and was approaching him with more purpose in his gait that just a man hoping for a little change, “I know you.” 

Loki narrowed his eyes, on edge immediately. It wasn’t often that anyone claimed to recognize him and it never lead to anything good. He searched the man’s face for any sign as who he might be. It took a second to peer through the facial hair and dirt on his face but the realization snapped into existence sickeningly quickly. He may not look as calm, preened, and wealthy he had the last time Loki had seen him but there was no mistake. This man had been his target once, not more than six months ago. 

He had been some mid-level director at his company. Not very important at the time but he was high-flying enough to have access to what Loki wanted, and was ruthless enough to be willing to buy into the promises of riches and career propulsion to the top that the persona of recruiter that Loki had presented had given. This man had essentially been tricked into robbing his own company in Loki’s stead. And look how far he had fallen in the time since... 

“I’ve been looking for you for months now,” the man growled, continuing to advance.  

“I’m sorry, I’m afraid you’ve gotten the wrong person,” Loki gave his best impression of a man very confused, hoping that perhaps he could convince him he was mistaken. 

“Oh no, you think I’d forget your face you little shit,” the man was face to face with him now, squaring his much larger shoulders up to Loki, standing eye to eye in height.  

A genuine fear began to bubble in his gut, “I have no idea what you’re talking about, sir,” Loki insisted, averting his eyes and trying to slip around the side of him. He didn’t even remember this man’s name. 

The former target held out an arm, barring Loki’s path, “Where do you think you’re goin’?” there was a malicious glint in his eye that Loki did not like the look of, “Not letting you go now I’ve found you. Easy to track you down since you started hanging around with that Stark guy. He your next target, hm? Looks like you’ve moved into the major leagues.” 

Loki allowed himself to feel a little bit of the fear that was beginning to flood his mind, hoping to fuel his act a little. He held his hands up in front of him in a gesture of peace, “Look, I don’t know what you’re talking about. Will you please let me pass?” 

The man shook his head, a mad smile starting to pull at his lips, “At least do me a favor and don’t treat me like a fucking stooge. Not again.” 

Loki maintained eye contact as he let his act fall away. It was harder to maintain than he had expected. He’d never had to confront the direct result of what he did before. But now it stood before him, fueled by nothing but revenge with nothing left to lose. Loki’s jaw tensed and he spoke through gritted teeth, “Get out of my way.” 

“You’re not going anywhere,” the man said with the eerie calm of man who was ready for violence.  

Suddenly, the man moved, too swiftly to react to, and Loki was slammed back against the brick wall. The air rushed from his lungs with a grunt and he struggled to regain it as the man’s forearm pressed against his throat, pinning him to the wall. Loki clawed and grabbed to try and  to pull it away but he was too strong. 

“Get your hands off me,” Loki ordered only to be cut off as the man leaned forward a little, weighing on his neck until he stopped struggling.  

“You took everything from me,” the man hissed, inches from Loki’s face, “What the fuck did you do with it?” 

Loki didn’t answer, simply stared back at him with a note of defiance. Having realized he wouldn’t be able to overcome his strength, he forced himself to calm down little. He would bide his time.  

“Probably just sold it off to the highest bidder, huh?” the man snapped, dirty teeth bared, “You’re just a fucking pathetic coward. Just a piece of shit thief.” 

A chuckle struggled from Loki’s lips past the pressure on his neck, “If I remember correctly, it was you to stole it. I just took it off your hands,” Loki grunted in pain as  words had as much of an incendiary impact as he had expected and the arm pressed on his throat just a little bit more. He knew taunting him wouldn’t help anything, but it was gut reaction. He had told himself a long time ago that he would not cower to anyone.  

The punch was not fast, but it wasn’t like Loki was able to avoid it. He watched in what felt like slow motion as a big, meaty fist raised over the man’s shoulder and came down hard against his cheek and nose. White light blinded him momentarily and a dull pain rippled out from the impact. His head lolled a little, the pain redoubling as he hit it on the bricks behind him. His knees went weak briefly and he would have stumbled were he not pinned in place.  

“You shut your fucking mouth,” the man hissed, venomously. 

Loki took a moment to allow the brief daze to pass before he looked back to the man. A reckless smile grew on his lips, “Why? Worried you’ll like what you hear?” 

The next punch split his lip and the metallic taste of blood laced his tongue.  

“I said, shut the fuck up!” rage burned in the man’s eyes, and in them Loki saw every man and woman he had ever targeted. This was what he had done. This is what he had caused. Every cowardly choice he had made had led him to this inevitable point. In truth he was surprised a previous target hadn’t found him sooner. There was a part of him that had known this is how it might eventually end.  

“It’s not like it took long,” Loki goaded, just wanting this over with now, “What was it? Two weeks? It was a vacation for me.” 

The next punch went to his gut. What little air he’d managed to regain was forced from his lungs in one painful gasp and he coughed hard to recover it. His abdomen screamed at him to tense up, bend double to defend himself but the man’s arm held him solidly in place. There was no break before the next punch hit in the same place. He gasped for breath to find none was forthcoming. Pain blossomed across his cheek as the man’s fist connected with his already bruising cheek, sending flickering lights across his vision. Another fell not long after that. Maybe this would be it.  

“Hey!”  

The new voice was vague and muffled under the sound of his own heartbeat throbbing in his ears, but Loki could have sworn he recognized it. The punches stopped and the man chuckled. Loki lifted his head to see what he was looking at. It felt heavier than usual. His eyes took a little longer than usual to focus but he just about made out two figures at the entrance of the alleyway.  

“Looks like your new project is here,” the man whispered, a new level of amusement in his voice. 

Loki didn’t say anything, just let his head rest against the brick behind him for a moment, eyes closed. This was the last thing he wanted.  

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing? Get the hell off him!” Tony’s voice had an anger that rivalled what he had heard only once before.  

“I’d stay out of this if I were you,” he heard the man sneer, “Your boyfriend isn’t what you think.” 

“I don’t think you heard me. Get your hands off him,” Tony’s voice was getting closer.  

“Oh, yeah, you wouldn’t be saying that if you knew what he really is. He’s nothing but a fucking, pathetic little thief and he’s about to get what’s coming to him,” the man’s voice had a victorious edge to it as he spat the words in Loki’s direction.  

There was a second voice that Loki didn’t recognize somewhere slightly further away, but he couldn’t make out what it said.  

There was a beat of silence before there was a thud of fist hitting hard bone. The pressure from his throat was released suddenly and without the forewarning to prepare, Loki slumped to his knees. He would have crumpled forward but one hand instinctively shot out to the wall for support. He coughed to regain his breath. 

“I don’t give a shit what he is,” he heard Tony growl somewhere nearby, “Now get lost.” 

When Loki finally opened his eyes, he saw the man scrambling to his feet and hurrying out of the alleyway. Tony another man stood between where he was kneeling and the fleeing man, watching him go. Loki reached up and gently probed his cheek. It stung sharply as he touched his nose but nothing felt broken. His cheek would likely be bruised, but that wasn’t anything he couldn’t handle. His lip was still bleeding a little, starting to trail down his chin and he wiped it away with the back of his hand. 

“You sure you don’t want me to call the cops?” the unfamiliar guy asked Tony quietly.  

“And tell them what? He was getting mobbed by a homeless guy so I broke his nose. Twitter would blow up on that one,” Tony and his friend exchanged a look before they turned their attention to Loki. Tony held his hand out to him, which Loki took gratefully and got slowly to his feet. Once he was stable, Tony folded his arms over his chest, “I leave you alone for two hours and you start a fight club?” 

“I’m not sure that could be described as a fight,” the second man chuckled. 

“You can say that again,” Tony muttered and gave Loki an evaluative once over, genuine concern in his eyes despite the mask of neutrality then looked to his friend, “I swear he’s not usually loitering in alleyways, aggravating homeless people.” 

Loki offered a reassuring smile best he could then looked to the new man who stood with his arms folded, and a questioning eyebrow raised. Loki dusted dirt off his hands best he could and extended the one without blood on it to him, “Loki. Good to meet you. Apologies that it couldn't be under better circumstances.” 

After a beat, the man smiled and gave the hand a firm shake, “James Rhodes, but they call me Rhodey. You alright? That was quite a beating.”  

“Believe it or not, I’ve had worse,” Loki replied with a breathy chuckle. 

“I don’t doubt that,” Tony commented, sounding almost irritated but he recovered quickly, “But the more pressing issue is that you aren’t going to allowed in many places with that mug. How about we go back to the tower for a drink or two? The drinks are certainly cheaper there and the only bouncers are certainly open to bribes.”  

Rhodey shrugged casually, “I’m always happy to drink your drinks.”  

Loki gently rubbed the bottom of his jaw, “I think that is probably a good idea.”  

At that, Tony clapped his hands and grinned, leading the way out of the alleyway and started out in the direction of the Tower and once they were there the evening passed quickly.  

Tony poured the drinks as Rhodey helped Loki wrap a pile of ice in a towel to press to his swelling cheek. He was well versed in first aid, something that came with the territory of being a colonel in the air force, Loki presumed. The conversation flowed easily and despite some of Loki’s initial fears, Rhodey steered clear of asking too many probing questions. When he did, Tony would not so subtly intervene and alter the course of the conversation, which gave Loki the impression that his background and it’s secrecy had come up before he had met them. Now that he was back in his new comfort zone, Loki found himself relaxing again, and the combination of good brandy and an ice pack to the side of his head was easing the pain of his cheek. A part of Loki once again highlighted to him that evenings like these were not anything he could truly have. Friends such as Rhodey who so had Tony’s back that he had followed him unquestioningly into a fight to defend someone he had never met. Maybe one day… 

When the time came for Rhodey to leave a couple of hours later, it was with a warm smile and a brief hug from the man before Tony walked him to the elevator where they had their own private goodbye that, understandably, lasted a little longer. 

The lift doors slid shut, and there was a brief moment of silence as Tony wandered back to where Loki was sat hands in pockets, “So you gonna tell me what happened?”  

Loki sighed and winced as he pressed what was left if the ice against his cheek again, “You saw the worst of it.” 

“Let me see,” Tony tilted his head knelt in front of him, and Loki let him guide his hand away, taking the ice pack away with it. Tony winced a little at whatever it was he saw, “Old friend of yours, hm?”  

Loki snorted as he allowed Tony move his head to the side so he could get a better look, “Oh yes. We played bridge on Sundays, he is quite the sore loser.” 

“I didn’t realize you were ninety years old,” Tony commented.  

“I have an excellent skin care routine.”  

“Shame that baby soft skin bruises like a peach,” Tony let go of his chin, but Loki didn’t meet his eyes, letting his gaze drop to the floor, “Who was he?”  

Loki swallowed, ashamed of his answer, “…I don’t remember his name.” 

“He an old project?” Tony asked directly, clearly realizing that implication wasn’t going to get anywhere.  

Loki nodded slowly, “I knew one of them would catch up with me one of these days. I’ve been careless recently.” 

Tony snorted, “Don’t give him too much credit. I doubt it was the culmination of months of carefully planned espionage. He came across you and threw a few punches. Random chance that’s all. Just a good thing I was there to save you, eh princess.” 

Loki didn’t share his mirth, “I can’t say I blame him.”  

Tony scowled at him, a little disbelievingly, “The hell you can’t! Dick move jumping you like that.”  

Loki lifted his gaze to meet Tony’s, “I’m serious. I ruined him, Tony. He was only in that alley because of what I did to him.” 

“You don’t know that.” 

“Yes, I do. Six months ago he was a successful man, powerful in his own world. He had money, he had a home, he had a future. Then he had the misfortune to be in my sights and now…” he trailed off and dropped his eyes to the floor again, “…well, he’s where I deserve to be…I’m a monster.” 

“No you're not,” Tony replied, so casually it was now irritating.  

Loki frowned at him, mouth agape, “Have you not listened to a word I’ve told you about who I and what I’ve done?”  

Tony just raised an unimpressed eyebrow at him, “You know I’ve met monsters. And not a some small fry that gets punched in the street because he stole a confidential marketing strategy. I’m talking about the ones that manipulate governments into war so they can profit off the thousands of people that are gonna get killed. I did business with those people. And not because anyone was holding my life hostage either, I did it by choice, because it was good business,” he shrugged as though it was nothing but Loki knew him well enough to see what it was taking for him to talk about this. The life be had left behind. “Hell, there was a time I had the opportunity to be one of those monsters. The only reason I didn't take it was because I was kidnapped before I had the chance to sign the contract,” he paused for a moment and swallowed back an emotion as he watched Loki for a reaction, “So, stop with the pity parade you’re throwing yourself? Take it from someone who’s ticked off every cliché there is, none of them help.”  

Loki’s brow twitched and his mouth set in a line as he struggled to find a response to the unexpected admission. He felt a tight feeling in his stomach as he tried to process the emotions that were flooding through his mind but they were so unfamiliar he could barely recognize them. He tried to dropped his gaze but Tony moved his face so that he caught his eyes again.  

“You’re not monster, Loki. Because monsters have a choice not to be. When was the last you got to choose?” Tony continued, holding his gaze with an earnest, wide-eyed expression. Loki’s silence was apparently enough of an answer so he went on, “If there’s one good thing that I’ve learnt in my shitshow of a life, it’s that nobody is irredeemable, as long as they want to be redeemed.” 

Loki felt a burning in his throat as he held Tony’s deep brown gaze. No one had ever spoken to him like this. No one had known enough about him, let alone cared to try to pull him out of the echo chamber of dark thoughts that was Loki’s own mind. His eyes ticked between Tony’s, hating himself for the fact that even now he couldn’t understand why this man was so intent on break through to him. 

 “Do you truly believe that?” he asked after a while, so quiet it was barely more than a whisper.  

Tony’s intense expression softened as he understood the impact of his words had had. His lips twitched up into a half smile, “Well, I didn’t keep you around for your incredible fighting skills, did I?”  

Loki gave a breathy laugh and he lowered his head, if only to hide the tear that had fallen down his cheek. He felt Tony edge forward a little and wrap an arm around his shoulders and Loki instinctively shifted to rest his forehead against the man's collarbone. 

Rough beard brushed against his temple as Tony spoke, “You’re gonna get out of this, you know. I promise you that.”  

The words landed a final blow on an armor Loki didn’t realize he had been holding on to. A shuddering breath slipped from him unbidden and he dropped the ice pack to the ground so he could slip his arms up Tony’s back and the balled the back of his shirt into his fists. Unable to be held back any longer, a soft sob shook his shoulders. In response, Tony lifted his second arm to join his first and embraced him. Another sob followed shortly after the first, followed by another, and then another as the weight of the last six years seemed to dawn on him in this one moment. It flooded through holes in the dam Tony had breached, armed with nothing but simple compassion. 

He screwed his eyes shut and turned his head to press his face into the warmth of Tony’s neck. He opened his mouth to say something. To thank this incredible man for everything he had done. To ask why he was doing it. To try to find out what, if anything he could possibly do to repay him. To try to express a feeling he had never felt before. One that he never thought that he could. 

But he could not speak.


	21. Chapter 21

The morning was dragging. According to the clock high up on the wall, it had only been a few hours since Tony had made his where down to his office, though he wasn’t so sure he believed it. He glanced over at the desk he had set up for Loki the week before, which now sat unoccupied, doing his best to ignore that gnawing concern in his stomach. 

Loki’s energy had drained quickly after his break down had started and he’d passed out on the sofa, still clinging to Tony’s shirt. Tony didn’t have the strength or will to move him, so he did some careful rearranging of limbs so the guy was laid out on the sofa and he’d settled himself into the chair nearby. It wasn’t likely that Loki would wake up, but if he did, Tony wasn’t going to let him be on his own. 

When the sun finally woke him the next morning, Loki had blinked awake and then sat up too quickly for his beaten body to be happy with. Tony had been ready with an ice pack, having not gotten much sleep of his own, but Loki brushed him away, almost violently refusing his help as he pushed himself to his feet and disappeared into the bathroom. He was gone for a long while. Long enough that Tony had been just about to go after him when he finally re-emerged, pulling a plain t-shirt over his head. In the brief flash of the skin of his torso, Tony caught a glimpse of a stormy cloud of bruising covered most of his right side. It matched the darkening shadow that lined his cheekbone and the bridge of his nose. There had been no time to even ask how he was feeling before Loki muttered something about clearing his head, and he had left.

The word he’d had from the man since had been the one-word response to the message Tony had sent an hour or so after his disappearance. There had been radio silence for nearly three hours now. 

Tony took a deep breath and rubbed his eyes then rested his temple against his fist, fighting the urge to call him. Clearly the guy needed some space. No one could understand that better than Tony, who routinely locked himself away from human contact for eight hours straight. But he just couldn’t shake the image of him pinned up against a wall, blood on his chin, a look of resignation in his eyes. It was a look he knew well. The only difference was that Tony’s methods of manic self-destruction had been alcohol and high-speed cars, rather than picking fights with homeless people. He didn’t like to think what would have happened if he and Rhodey hadn’t turned up when they had. 

Was this how everyone else had felt when he was going off the tracks? No wonder they had been so pissed all the time...

“Hey Jarvis,” Tony asked the air, staring at his phone laid on the desk not far away, “You didn’t happen to be watching when we picked up Loki last night, were you?”

“Apologies, sir, none of my devices were active or visible at that time,” Jarvis replied, “May I ask why?”

“A want to track that guy down. Firstly, I want to make sure I did actually break his nose and rectify that situation if I failed,” Tony scratched his head, “And second, if Loki won’t tell me who he works for, that guy could be my key to finding out.”

There was a moment of silence as Jarvis processed something, “Perhaps the nearby establishments have active CCTV which may have captured useful images.”

“See what you can get from them, but be careful, we don’t exactly have a warrant for this,” Tony paused for thought, “Oh and for the love of god, don’t tell anyone about this?” 

“Of course, sir, I will let you know when I have something.”

“You’re the best, J,” Tony said, though without his usual enthusiasm. One lead in the bag. One to go.  

He picked up his phone and then thought better of it. If he hadn’t heard anything by the end of the day, then he would be worried. 

A knock on the door pulled him from his thoughts and Pepper popped her head around it. Tony pulled on a mask of professional distraction and didn’t look up as she appeared. 

“Dr Blake for you, Tony,” she smiled, apparently falling for his faked demeanor. 

“Sure, sure send him in,” Tony gestured vaguely, pretending like he was signing one of the documents on his desk. In truth, it probably did need his signature but he’d had one too many near misses to sign things without reading them anymore.

Thor appeared as Pepper swung the door open for him, dressed in a yet another checked shirt. Tony briefly wondered whether how many the guy owned as he smiled at Pepper and the door was closed behind him. 

“Good morning, Tony, how are you today?” he greeted, cheerfully as always as he crossed the room. It was irritating in a way, but Thor was one of those people that it was almost impossible to be irritated with, “You look tired.”

“Yeah, been a rough night,” Tony sighed and gestured at the chair in front of his desk and waited until he had taken a seat before continuing, “Thanks for coming up at such short notice.”

“It is no problem at all, everything is progressing smoothly on my end, always happy to help,” Thor beamed.

"Well you might not be so happy in a minute, I actually wanted to talk you about your brother.”

Thor’s demeanor changed instantly. His smile faltered and died, and he sat a little more upright in his chair, “Loki? What is it? Is he alright?”

“No. Not really.”

Thor’s brow creased and a slight flicker of annoyance sparked in his eye, “What do you mean?”

Tony took a deep breath. He'd spent a long time trying to decide whether to involve Thor or not. On the one hand, Loki had made it clear every step of the way that no one, not even Thor could know of any of what he had been up to, and that for every new person that found out, his chances of escaping were cut. On the other, right now Loki needed as many people on his side as he could get. Tony knew better than most that the key factor in surviving one’s own mind was to have trusted people to fight against it in those times when you couldn’t. Tony could only do so much on his own, and Thor was the only person who had a chance of not turning on him if he learnt of Loki’s true nature.

After a moment’s pause to give his decision the final once over, Tony scooted forward, leant on the desk and told him everything. He explained why Loki was in New York in the first place, and why he had popped in their lives when he had. He explained how that is had been Odin himself that had revealed Loki’s true nature and the fact that he had so very nearly disappeared without a word again, but at the last-minute Tony had offered a stay of execution. Which lead to the explanation of the current situation. Thor had known that Loki was assisting with the Wakanda problem, it had been an easy, verifiable explanation as to why he was suddenly at the Tower almost every day. But Thor hadn’t been aware of the escape attempt side project that the two of them were working on. 

Thor sat in stoic silence throughout the explanation, an irritatingly unreadable expression on his face throughout. The only indication of emotion had been the slight twitch of an eye as Tony had had to break the news to him about Odin. It had not been at the intensity that Tony had expected. Either Thor didn’t believe him, or he already knew. Tony could only hope for the latter. 

“Why are you only telling me this now?” Thor asked after a moment, once Tony had finished his story. There was only the slightest hint of anger in his voice, but it was enough that Tony realized he had to tread carefully, “I came to you a month ago for help and you have waited until now to tell me anything. Why?”

“Because Loki asked me not to,” Tony replied simply, having anticipated the question, “And until recently, that seemed like the best option.”

Thor narrowed his eyes at that, “Until recently?”

Tony swallowed. If nothing had elicited a reaction so far, this was the one thing that still could, “...He was attacked last night, one of these former targets.” Thor’s eyes went wide and he made to get out of his chair, but Tony held up a calming hand and continued before Thor could react with any real violence, “He’s ok! Rhodey and I got there in time, he’s a bit roughed up but he’s fine, physically anyway.”

“What do you mean, Tony?” Thor growled, increasing frustration on his face. 

“When we got there, he wasn’t fighting back...” Tony paused a moment to let the meaning of his words sink in, “I’m telling you now, because it seemed pointless keeping his secrets if he’s going to go and give up before we can help him.”

There was a beat of silence between them as Thor processed what Tony had said. He sat forward and rested his forearms on his thighs, peering at the floor with level of seriousness Tony hadn’t known he had been capable of until now. Eventually, he exhaled loudly, “What can we do?”

A small smile flickered at Tony’s lips as his gamble paid off, “I’m working on trying to find out who it is that is holding his leash, but it’s a slow process. It’s the one thing he’s not telling me.”

“Loki has always been very careful with what he does and does not say,” Thor told him, “Whatever he has kept back from you, there will be a reason.”

“There is. He says that whoever it is, has the power to take me down if I get in their way,” Tony gave a little shrug, “Whether that’s true or not, who knows, but he’s sure enough of it not to tell me.”

“I would take heed of his word, Tony, he has never been one to grant his enemies too much credit. If he thinks they can rival you, then they likely can.”

Tony wafted a hand, “Well I guess we’ll just have to agree to disagree, but if he doesn’t want to tell me, then fine. There is one other person who might know for sure.”

“Who?”

Tony paused, ready for what impact his next words might have, “Your dad.” Thor narrowed his eyes. “Like I said, he was the one who sent Loki here, and if that project is what got him into this, Odin will know who it was. Now, I don’t think he’ll talk to me. Not a smart business move to discuss your less than honest dealings with a joint venture buddy. But you? You might have a chance.”

There was a moment of silence and Tony fought to maintain his poker face, despite the panic that this wouldn’t work. That Thor would stand and flip the table in response the accusations Tony was throwing at his father’s feet. But, eventually, Thor just exhaled and lowered his gaze, searching the ground before nodding, “I will see what I can do.”

Tony blinked in surprise, “What? That’s it? Gotta say, I was expecting a bit of a fight.”

“You have no reason to lie about this,” Thor took a deep breath and looked back to him, “Besides, this is not the first time I have heard this about my father. Loki asked the same of me several times now, but I stubbornly refused to acknowledge them as anything but baseless lies. Perhaps if I had done something sooner...” he shook his head to, push away a thought before continuing, “I will reach out to my father this afternoon and see what he has to say.”

“Thanks, Thor,” Tony said, earnestly. 

Thor accepted the gratitude with a nod, still looking somber then frowned as he sat up in the chair, “Why did Loki not want you tell me any of this?”

Tony gave a humorless smile, “He didn’t say outright, but I got the impression that he was worried that if you found out you wouldn’t look at him the same way,” he regarded the guy quietly for a moment, and then asked “Do you think any less of him?” 

“He is my brother, Tony, and nothing he has done will change that,” Thor said with a finality that Tony wished Loki had been to hear. Maybe it would help. 

“Yeah, that’s what I thought,” Tony gave a satisfied smile, then relaxed back into his chair a little, tilting it back a little, “Now, I'm not saying don’t tell Loki I told you any of this, but I would rather you could avoid it for as long as possible. I don’t think he’ll be too happy with me when he finds out.”

Thor gave a humorless chuckle, “No, I suspect he won’t, but I think you have done the right thing in coming to me with this. Though, he may disagree,” he got to his feet, and Tony stood alongside him on instinct. The height difference was obvious enough without Tony being sat down. “You have my gratitude for everything you have done for him.”

Tony nodded silently, “Don’t thank me yet. We’re not out of the woods.”

Thor turned to go, paused, and turned back, “I have not spoken to him as much as I would have liked in his time here. But you should know, it is clear that he cares for you. Deeply. Please take care of that. His affection is hard-earned and easily lost, but while you have it, he will go to extreme lengths in your name. It may lead him to make some poor decisions.”

Tony inhaled sharply and shoved his hands in his pockets if only to hide the nervous fidgeting of his fingers, “Has he always been such an ice queen?”

Thor chuckled, “Don’t be disheartened, Tony. He likely does not know his own feelings let alone acknowledge them. But he does not typically suffer fools for very long.”

“Well, I am known as a particularly insufferable fool, so we’ll see how far his patience goes,” Tony replied with a smirk that covered the sudden wave of cautious excitement. 

“If he has confided in you everything you have told me, well, it is more than he has told any one person in all of the time I have known him. Even given the circumstances, it means more than you know that he is still here,” Thor was quiet for a moment, and in a rare turn of events Tony had nothing to fill the silence. “I’ll let you know what I can find out for you.”

Thor offered a weak smile and then turned and headed from the office. 

******

Loki sat in on a bench overlooking the river, his head in his hands, trying to shake the queasy combination of exhaustion and anxiety that sat like a vice around his chest. It had survived the flow of the cold water of Tony’s shower earlier that morning. It had made it hard to breathe as he had left the tower with barely a word. It had held his focus as he’d returned to his old apartment to assess and cover the marks on his face. It had grown tighter as he wondered what would happen if Thanos was to find out what had happened. 

The break down the night before had been unprecedented. It had been years since he had gone through anything close to that.  He hadn’t had time to. It was succeed or die as far as he was concerned and by necessity, he had grown numb to everything outside of that. Emotions were just something that got in the way. Something to be dismissed or locked away or flooded with alcohol until they were no longer a problem. But recently, it had been harder and harder to ignore them, all culminating into the emergence of a dark part of his psyche he had never had to confront before. And all it had taken was a beating from the personification of the consequences of his actions. It had surprised even him how quickly he had resigned himself to his fate. If Tony hadn’t shown up when he did...

The same series of questions raced through his mind, repeating themselves over and over again. How many more like that man were there? Tens, hundreds? How many had Loki ruined to such a degree? How many were worse? Why had it taken so long for Loki to lift his head out of the sand long enough to see the true extent of his actions?

That was the worst part. The sudden realization that his cowardice had erased any empathy he might once have had for those he was targeting. Over the years, he had systematically shut down any ounce of sympathy he had until it had felt like that part of him was locked behind a glass wall. Able to watch every action, but do nothing but scream wordlessly into the void of his subconscious as he had ruined target after target after target, never once looking back. That’s all they had been to him. Targets. Just names on a page. Not people with lives that Loki was content to rip away from them as long as he could keep his own. 

But now, that glass wall had been shattered and all of that bottomless remorse had flooded through in one overwhelming tsunami. 

How could he possibly come back from this? What was there left to go back to?

Loki felt this throat begin to dry and he clenched his fists into his hair and tugged, using the pain to ground himself. The bruised skin on his cheek stretched and prickled as he did. A reminder of what he deserved. 

His phone vibrated in his pocket and he let his arms drop to rest his forearms on his thighs, already knowing who it was and what he would be saying. He’d already told Tony he was fine, what more did the man want from him? This was in part his fault. Loki wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for him. Damn that caring bastard…

Tony had wanted nothing from him except honesty, and he had repaid Loki’s truths by carefully dismantling every shred of constructed armor Loki had with a detailed focus only a man like him could employ. Now that there was nothing left and he had found the man Loki truly was cowering in the darkness, he seemed determined to drag him out, no matter the kicking and screaming. Could he not see that there was no redemption for him? 

_No one is irredeemable, so long as they want to be redeemed._

Tony’s voice skimmed across his mind, instantly drowning out the echoes of his own thoughts. He brought his hands down over his eyes, careful to avoid the bruises lining his eye socket that had spread over his nose. If this is what redemption felt like, he wasn’t so sure he wanted it.

Loki exhaled slowly, and pulled his phone from his pocket. 

A photo of a cup of coffee set out on the desk that Loki recognized as the one he used in Tony’s office filled the screen of the phone. A message underneath it read, ‘ _I’m just_ _gonna_ _keep_ _remaking this_ _until you come back and drink one you know’_.

A soft, unbidden smile pulled at Loki’s lips the cut on his protested and it twisted into a wince. He rubbed his eyes with his free hand and took as deep breath as he could with his ribs in the state they were in. He suspected there may be a fracture, but there wasn’t much that could be done about that. 

Why was he out here, sitting alone on a bench? He wondered suddenly. What good would that do? Every ounce of help he had ever found, had been found in that one room at the top of that one tower, at the hands of that one man. So why did he keep running from him? 

For now, he didn’t have answers for any of those questions. But the bench wouldn’t have them either and Tony was worried. He hadn’t meant for that, he had upended Tony’s life so much already, but emotions themselves were largely a commodity he had not been able to afford for a long time. Clearly, he was out of practice in handling them.

The walk back to Stark Tower wasn’t long, but he made the journey on autopilot, only realizing that he was back at the Tower as he stepped out of the lift onto the floor of Tony’s office. He kept his head down as he made followed the usual route to the office door, wishing he had taken the time to stop and double check how much of his cheek was still obvious under the make-up he had applied. There had been nothing he could do about his lip, but thankfully the corridors were relatively empty. 

The office itself was at the end of a long corridor that, through two doors. The first of which was set into a glass wall and brought any visitors face to face with both Steve and Pepper, who would usually relay any requests to Tony themselves through the secondary door that sat opposite the first. 

Loki hesitated outside the first, his hand hovering over the door handle. That familiar question came to his mind, once again. Maybe now? He could just turn and walk away. Slip away without a word. Surely that would be better for everyone...

Before he could retract his hand, the door was pulled open from the inside and Pepper stood in the doorway. 

“Loki,” she greeted then winced involuntarily as her gaze ticked down to the cut on his lip, “Oh, that looks painful. Are you ok?”

“It looks worse than it is,” Loki assured her, attempting a smile but feeling the thin skin of the healing cut pull taut as he did, “Is he busy?”

"No more than usual,” she replied with her usual level of dismay, stepping aside to let him into the outer office. Steve wasn’t at his desk, but that wasn’t unusual. Between the two of them, the PAs spent a large part of their time acting in meetings up and down the building. “But I don’t think there’s anything scheduled,” she continued, closing the door behind him and returning to her own desk, 

“Would you mind if I...”

She shook her head, gesturing to the door, “No, no, go right ahead.”

Loki nodded his thanks, and entered Tony’s office proper. 

Tony was sat at his desk, head bowed over something with a charade of busyness that Loki had become familiar with over his time in the Tower. Loki let the door fall closed with an audible click rather than greet him, feeling suddenly uneasy. Having expected to hear Pepper to chastise him for something or other, the following silence was unusual enough to make Tony lift his head with a frown. Upon seeing him, Loki felt his chest tighten a little more, but this one was not an unusual reaction to seeing the man, and although Loki had yet to discern its origins, he had begun to accept it. 

There was flinch as Tony seemed to suppress the urge to stand up, instead dropping the pen he had been pretending to write with, and sitting upright a little. 

“It’s worrying how good you are at covering that up,” he said after a moment of the two of them watching each other. Tony got to his feet calmly, affecting a forced relaxation that Loki would have missed if he hadn’t spent so much time with the man recently, “You left pretty quick this morning.”

Loki looked to the floor, “I’m sorry, I don’t...,” he started hesitantly, unsure of how to approach this, “I’ve not had to deal with that before.”

Tony came around the front of his desk and leant on it, “I wasn’t sure you were going to come back.”

“For a little while, neither was I,” Loki admitted after a moment.

Tony folded his arms across his chest, “You wanna talk about it?” 

Loki gave a humorless chuckle, “I can think of nothing I would enjoy less..

“Fair enough...How’re you feeling though?” 

Loki lifted his gaze to Tony’s, drinking in the slight crease of concern on his brow, the deep genuineness of care in his eyes as he waited patiently for an answer, and in that he found the confidence to speak with an honesty he had not felt before. “I feel as though every remnant of who I thought I was has been shattered. And I can’t decide whether I am thankful for that or terrified because underneath that charade, I am finding it hard to find anything to replace it...”

“Nothing?” Tony tilted his head a little, raising an eyebrow, “You mean apart from the scarily intelligent, exceptionally good-looking, top-class ice skater, with a mind for history, and languages both human and computer. Just off the top of my head.”

Loki raised an eyebrow at him, “Must you have an answer to everything?”

“It’s a significant part of my personality, yes,” Tony replied simply, and Loki couldn’t help but smirk a little before Tony continued with a more serious tone, “Look, what you do is not who you are. You just haven’t had a chance to see that yet.”

Loki shook his head and asked the question that he suspected he may never truly accept an answer to, “Why are you so invested in this, Tony? Why do you care about who I am?”

Tony shrugged, “Maybe it’s because you make good coffee. Maybe it’s because I like you, a lot. Have done since the moment we met. Maybe it’s because I know what it’s like to suddenly realize that the foundations you built your life on turn out to be nothing but crap and hot air and I refuse to see you go down like I did. Pick whichever you like, they’re all true.”

Loki opened his mouth to reply, but he couldn’t find a response. 

“But enough of that,” Tony declared suddenly, coming out of his lean with an exaggerated effort, walked to Loki’s desk, and picked up the coffee cup from it holding it out in Loki’s direction, “Now you’re back and not in the mood for talking, you’ve got some work to catch up on.”

Loki took a deep breath and eased himself away from the door. That tightness around his chest that had followed him since the moment he awoke was loosening. He crossed to the desk where he took the now lukewarm cup of coffee that was offered. 

“T’Challa wanted to speak to you, but I said it had to wait until Monday. So, he sent some reports for you to read before then,” he gestured to the small pile of papers stacked on Loki’s desk, “Let me know if you need anything, but I have a bunch of stuff I’ve already told Pepper I'd done that I should really get started on. You do need to give me a list of places you want information on so I can set up the flyovers. Oh and we have a dinner next Thursday.”

“What kind of dinner?”

Tony frowned at him, “That’s what you picked out of that?”

Loki shrugged and went to sip at the coffee only for his ribs to protest and he had to switch to his off hand, attempting to cover the wince as he did so.

Tony glanced down at his torso, but didn’t mention anything, “Well, Rhodey is getting an award for pulling me out of... you know,” Tony sniffed, not quite glossing over his unease at the word Afghanistan, “I don’t know if I mentioned he was the one who eventually found me. Took him long enough, I don’t see why he gets a medal. Quite frankly, I did most of the work and all I got was PTSD. But that's besides the point, they’re putting on a big military dickswing and I’m a guest of honor.”

Loki frowned a little, “Forgive me if I am overstepping my bounds, I know he is your friend but that doesn’t sound like a situation you should be in.”

Tony’s eyebrows rose and fell quickly, “Yeah tell me about it, but I gotta go. He did save my life or whatever and I wouldn’t hear the end of it.”

“I’m sure he would understand, Tony.”

“Yeah probably…” Tony trailed off without really addressing Loki’s point, clearly this was important to him, “You’re coming with me. You can hold my hand while I quietly dissociate.”

A number of issues were highlighted as Loki instinctively evaluated the potential scenarios that this could lead to. The threat of official press photos, and being acknowledged publicly as Tony’s ‘plus one’ would not do much good for his already tenuous covert existence. But the thought was shoved to one side almost immediately. Surely the worst harm had already been done. Besides, he had seen how Tony reacted to his own memories of Afghanistan, he did not want to think how he might react to a live retelling of the events. Especially alone. 

“Plus, I need someone who’s going to make me look good on the red carpet,” Tony continued, oblivious to Loki’s internal debate.

Loki raised an eyebrow, “Is standing beside a man with a black eye and split lip the only way to make that happen? Whatever did you do before I came along?” 

Tony gave him a pointed look, “I got a hell of a lot more work done, I can tell you that.”

“I can’t imagine that is remotely true.” 

“Prove it,” Tony retorted quickly, “You in?”

Loki exhaled through his nose, “I suppose if you insist on jumping into fights for me, it’s the least I can do is parade myself around as suitable comparison.”

Tony beamed, “Great, I’ll let Rhodey know,” with that he returned to his own desk and took a seat, where he plucked the coffee cup and held it out in Loki’s direction, “Oh and it’s definitely your turn.”

“Nobody asked you make coffee for me while I wasn’t here, besides I still have mine,” Loki raised an eyebrow as he sipped from his own drink to emphasize the point, but Tony only wiggled his cup in response, “You’d ask an injured man to make you a drink?”

“Oh no, you’re not playing that card, Princess Peach, you didn’t want sympathy this morning, you’re not getting any now,” Tony raised his eyebrows expectantly. 

Loki tried and failed to fight the smirk that grew on his face. 

Everything felt so simple, so uncomplicated in this room, with Tony. This was Tony’s redemption. His new life, risen from the ashes of the old that had been destroyed far more violently that Loki’s. And the man had survived. If this was even just a glimmer of what redemption could look like for Loki too, then there was no doubt in his mind. He wanted it. He wanted it badly. 


	22. Chapter 22

"You didn't tell them,” Tony was leant back at an almost 45 degree angle in his office chair, swaying it side to side slightly as he watched Loki finally finish pacing now that the phone call was over. The man regarded his phone in one hand with a level of cautiousness that one might have for a grenade. 

“It didn’t seem necessary,” he said after a moment, lifting his free hand to gently rub the bruise on his cheek that was starting to turn a slight green color, “It was my own carelessness that led to it, and they don’t exactly take kindly to carelessness. I can only presume that your public facing nature has not helped my own.”

“So...hypothetically...a dedicated hashtag on twitter might not be a good idea...?” Tony asked, wincing a little as Loki lifted his gaze and raised an eyebrow at him. 

“No, not really, though I suspect they are aware of ‘StarKrossedLovers’,” Loki gave a small, knowing smirk at Tony’s confusion, “I know about the hashtag, Tony. I have not survived this long without monitoring my online presence, and they do as well. Which is why you may have noticed that there are no photos of my face on that feed. Deleting all of them would be too obvious, so they are selective.”

Tony had sat up as Loki started speaking, made a gesture in the air and brought up said twitter feed, scrolling through it. Just as he said, there many photos, but they were always from behind or the side, or just the wrong angle to be able to work out who this person was. Clever. Tony made another gesture and the feed vanished, “What did they say? Anything I should know.”

Loki pondered the question in silence for a moment before answering, “No. They seem largely disinterested in what I’m doing at the moment, which is about the best we can hope for. Though I can’t say how long that will last, given T'Challa is getting very close to the operative in Wakanda.” 

“T’Challa told you that?” Tony asked.

Loki hummed in agreement, “He has picked out those in his employ who may fit the criteria I developed. He wants me to speak to them myself.”

“I imagine you have some reservations about that,” Tony commented, relaxing back into his chair and watching as Loki tucked his phone into the pocket of his jeans. 

“Some,” he replied with a slight shrug, “If I can do so without showing my face, then I don’t think it will be a problem.”

Tony nodded, already going over solutions to the problem, “We can set something up.” 

Loki gave him a soft smile, “I knew you’d say something like that.” 

Tony opened his mouth to reply but there was a knock at the door before he got a chance. He and Loki shared a confused glance. It was a Saturday. Other than a few diligent directors with deadlines to meet and the essential maintenance staff, the building was empty. The former knew better than to come knocking at his office door and the latter were likely unaware he was even there. Tony hesitated, not sure he wanted to have to deal with anything so urgent as to come his door on a weekend, but he quickly changed his mind when a familiar voice called through the door. 

“Tony? Are you there? I have news.”

Tony blinked and tried to hide his expression from Loki, trying to work out exactly how Thor could have had worse timing. 

“News?” Loki asked in a quiet voice, not quite suspicious, but not far off either.

Tony didn’t answer, not sure whether to even answer at all. He quickly weighed the pros and cons, finding the key con being that Loki was going to be angry. Probably a few steps beyond angry, actually. Though that was lessened as a con a little with the knowledge that Loki would be angry no matter how he found out, it would be easier to the music if he knew it was coming. 

“It's open!” Tony called, deliberately ignoring the questioning scowl Loki was giving him.

Thor pushed through the door with all his usual confidence only to falter a couple of strides into the room when he caught sight of Loki stood off to one side. 

“Brother,” he breathed in greeting then looked to Tony for some direction.

Tony took a quick breath and nodded his reassurance, “You said you had something?” 

Thor regained some measure of his composure and crossed the remaining distance of the room, coming to a stop level with Loki, fixing him with an expression of concern that carried an intensity that only Thor could manage. It was unusual enough that Loki narrowed his eyes at him.

“Why are you looking at me like that?” he asked, running his eyes up and down his brother, folding his arms across his chest in an intuitively defensive posture. 

Thor swallowed before speaking with a gravity that lent itself well to his deep voice, “I’m sorry, that I didn’t believe you sooner.”

The quizzical look on Loki’s face was deepening into distrust and glanced at Tony quickly then back to Thor, “What are you talking about?”

“You said you had some news?” Tony interrupted, keen to cut to the chase. This was not going to be a pleasant experience and the faster he could get through it the better. 

Thor looked back to Tony, as though pulled from a reverie by his voice, “I have a name of the megacorporation that my father sought to attack a small part of all those years ago.” 

Out of the corner of his eye, he could see Loki’s expression shift instantly to a look of horrified disbelief. 

Tony nodded slowly, “Good, good, what is it?”

But Loki spoke before Thor could answer him. 

“You told him,” the words were calm but there was a chilling disbelief to them that cut Tony deeper than he had expected. As though he could hear that meagre trust the man had built up, shattering in that one sentence

Tony pursed his lips for a second holding his gaze then looked to Thor, “Would you mind giving us a minute? I think it’s best if we go through this all together but I think I owe your brother an explanation first.”

After a second, Thor gave a reluctant nod, glanced at Loki and left the office once again. 

The click of the door closing seemed absurdly loud in the tense silence the two of them found themselves in. It felt like a physical weight on his shoulders as Tony watched Loki carefully, who had lowered his gaze, mouth slightly open.

“I sense…anger,” Tony started in his usual lighthearted way that deep down he knew would probably only serve to make him angrier. 

Loki gave a dangerous, humorless chuckle, his head shaking slowly, “I am… _furious_ ,” he said, lifting his gaze to meet Tony’s and he could sense the difficulty with which held his calm, “I asked only two things of you in my time here.” He held up two long fingers, “One, that you stay away from my employer and two, that Thor does not find out,” he took on an almost impressed expression, “And you managed to decimate both of those in one fell swoop. Did my precarious situation somehow slip your mind?” 

“I am reminded of it daily.”

“Then you cannot even claim ignorance,” Loki snapped, that fury writ clear on his face, “I never planned on staying here but you told me that I could trust you. I followed your rules, I acquiesced your request for aid with Wakanda, despite my better judgement, I have been introduced to your friends by name and by association and yet it did not seem to be enough for you. Your incessant need to know _everything...”_ he paused as the frustration of what he was saying overtook him and he shook and closed his eyes a moment, “Do you know what you might have done?” 

“No, but I bet you’re gonna tell me.”

Loki scoffed disbelievingly at him, “Is everything a joke to you? You coast through your life apparently under the assumption that because you have your life all figured out you can solve the problems of all of those around you by proxy. You deliberately and knowingly betrayed my trust to meddle in something that you seem to think you understand despite having no knowledge of it whatsoever.”

Tony held up his hands in a peace gesture, “How about you calm down and let me explain?” 

“Calm down?!” Loki repeated the words with a furious lilt, “You don’t seem to understand that what you have done threatens not only my life but yours and Thor’s, the one thing I have been trying to avoid through all of this. I don’t understand how you have yet to grasp this.” 

Tony kept his face as deadpan as possible despite the turmoil raging in his mind, “Am I going to get a chance to speak or have you still got some hot air to let off?”

“Oh you will speak, Tony, and it had better be a good explanation.”

Tony held Loki’s gaze defiantly, “Long story short, I don’t like fighting people blind.” 

Loki narrowed his eyes, “This is not your fight. You don’t need to know who the enemy is. All you’ll do is open yourself up to further attack from them.” 

“What attack?” Tony replied with a question he had been curious about for a long time, “Tell me exactly, what would they do? You’ve never said, all you’ve given is vague threats here and there. It would be useful, to know exactly whatever this mystery threat is.”

Loki answered, but not as quick as he should have. It was a hesitation of less than a second, but one that was not characteristic of the guy, “You don’t understand.”

“You keep saying that but all I’m hearing is, ‘I don’t have an answer’,” Tony told him. It was something his own therapist had said to him a long time ago and by the look on his face it seemed to strike a similar chord in Loki as it had in himself the first time he’d heard it. After a second of him not answering, Tony leant forward on the desk, “I can help you, Loki, and God knows I want to, but you’re crippling my ability to do that by keeping me in the dark.”

“We’ve had this conversation already!” Loki snapped, his gaze intense as he cut one hand through the in front of himself in a slashing motion, “You have done more for me than I deserve and I will not have you nor Thor putting yourselves in harm’s way in some futile attempt to save me,” there was still force in his voice but it had shifted away from aggression, back to his more familiar territory of self-pity. 

Tony rolled his eyes, “You have got to stop with that ‘I don’t deserve this’ BS. You want to know why I went behind your back and told Thor?”

“Because you knew I’d say no,” Loki spat.

“Because you’re too close to this to see straight!” Tony snapped back finding himself becoming increasingly frustrated, then rubbed a hand over his face, exhaling in an attempt to calm down a little and changed tactic. Plan A was not going so well, “What’s your plan, then? After your time is up?”

Loki frowned a little, confusion drooping his shoulders ever so slightly, “You know my plan.”

“The run away to a dingy backwater and hope you’re forgotten about plan?” Tony asked, raising an eyebrow, “God awful. Pissing in the wind. You said so yourself, you can’t just walk away from this life.”

“And what exactly am I supposed to do, Tony?!” he hid it was well but there was a note of fear behind the exasperation in Loki’s voice. 

“Exactly my point, I don’t know what to tell you until I know who you’re up against!” Tony threw his hands up and stood from his chair, “Don’t you see that? I have knowledge, I have resources, I give a shit, and I want to help you. But I am sick of waiting for you to ask for it.” He stopped and held Loki’s intense gaze for a moment, “I'm telling you  _let_ me.”

Loki eyed him, some undisclosed thought process working behind his gaze, his mouth set in a grim line, chest rising and falling in deep, controlled breaths. 

Tony sighed and dropped his gaze to the floor, rubbing the bridge of his nose with his thumb and forefinger, “I have one last play here and it’s not one that I wanted to use, but you don’t seem to trust the selfless reasons. Maybe you’ll trust the selfish one.”

Loki eyes narrowed ever so slightly in question.

“I’m not doing this as just some tickbox philanthropic exercise,” Tony came around the front of the desk and leant back against it, maintaining eye contact as his inherent nature fought what he was about to admit, “I...don’t want you to go.”

Loki’s features softened for an instant but he covered it, “What?”

“I don’t want two months, or three months, or four. I don’t want a time limit. I want it to be up to you and me how long we have together,” Tony watched Loki to make sure the meaning of his words was being conveyed, “But that can’t happen as long as someone is breathing down your neck. When it comes to getting what I want, I can get a little tenacious. So, I’m sorry for the deception, Loki, really I am, but I don’t want you to go and this was the only way I could see to make that happen.” 

Loki swallowed and his shoulders dropped a little as he lost a little of his fight, “Tony, I-”

Tony lifted a hand to cut him off, “Like I said, didn’t want to bring it up right now, there was probably a much better time and place, but you forced my hand,” he gave a shrug as though this was all actually Loki’s fault, “Besides, it won’t matter if I can’t help you.”

Loki’s eyes flicked between Tony’s for a moment, eyebrows high, expression soft.

“He doesn’t hate you, you know,” Tony offered, taking a guess at what could be holding the last of Loki’s resolve together. As he spoke, Loki lowered his gaze, “The guy’s spent six years searching for you, that sounds like a kind of love that takes a bit more than this to break. He just wants you to be able to go home.”

At that, Loki exhaled, “Damn you both,” he muttered, but it had none of the venom of his previous statements.

“So...can I let him back in and find out what he knows?” Tony asked cautiously, “I’d like you stay if you feel you can. I don’t expect you to have to contribute, but a verification would be useful.”

Loki didn’t lift his head, “Fine,” he said begrudgingly, “Damn you both, but fine. I will accept your help.”

Tony grinned, “You won’t regret it.”

Loki fixed Tony with a tired look, which was accentuated by the still dark ring around his eye, “I believe I already am,” he replied quietly.

**

Loki watched, feeling a little detached, as Tony crossed the office and disappeared out of it to find wherever Thor had gone off to. 

Emotions of all kinds roiled in his mind. He wasn’t angry that Tony was making sense, it was that in his six years here, he had never made it to these conclusions himself. A product of the manipulation, he supposed. It was true, Thanos had never given him an example of what they could do or even what they might do to those third parties should Loki fail or betray them. It was all vague threats, largely levelled against himself or Asgard in the early days. But as far as he knew, Asgard was still standing, still thriving. Then again, Loki had never thought to call these bluffs because the potential ramifications were too much to consider. The fact they had followed through on every threated thrown his own way was convincing enough not to question them too closely. 

 _I don’t want you to go_. 

The phrase echoed across his mind, Tony’s voice once again thankfully drowning out his own spiraling thoughts. Loki had always wanted to find a way to come back from this. To one day redeem himself to the point at which he could reenter society. He had never considered the possibility of not going anywhere in the first place. It had never been an option. Step one had always to get as far away from Thanos as possible. Now Tony was presenting the idea that step one wasn’t necessary?

In those six words, Tony had lit a torch that Loki had secretly clutched since the day he had been offered sanctuary, and though it burned dimly, the fact it burned at all meant more to him that he had anticipated. 

He was thankfully pulled from his thoughts as the door to the office reopened as Thor and Tony returned. Tony flashed him a smile as he came in and went straight to his coffee machine, ever the professional host. Thor paused just inside the door as it swung shut behind him. Loki held the man’s gaze. 

In his weeks here, his relationship with Thor had become easier but it had felt superficial. A new relationship, rather than the rekindling of a brotherhood lost. But there was a new weight to the man’s gaze as though Loki was being seen properly for the first time. After a moment of unbearable tension, Loki took a deep breath. 

“I understand you may have learned a little more about me than you might have...expected,” he started, uncertainly. 

Without saying a word, Thor strode across the room, rushing with a purpose that caused Loki to lift his arms ready in defense. Before he could react, Thor threw his arms around Loki's shoulders in an embrace. It might have been a tender moment one that Loki may have even partaken in were it not for his injured ribs screaming in response to the new found pressure on them. 

“Thor...please...ribs,” Loki gasped. 

Immediately, Thor released him but didn’t take a step back, simply resting his hands on Loki’s shoulders, “Ah, I apologize,” he said giving Loki an evaluative once over, chuckling nervously, “I should have known. It appears I have a lot to apologize for. Again.”

Loki lifted a hand to his side, shot a brief glance to reassure Tony who’s attention had been drawn by his cry of pain, then looked back to his brother, “You have already apologized to me the morning you showed me Mjolnir. Do you remember? You don’t need to repeat yourself.”

“I do,” Thor said solemnly, “For, at the time, I did not truly know what I was apologizing for and so it was not as earnest as it could have been.”

“Yes, well, I suppose I should take some responsibility for that,” Loki muttered, “I thought by keeping you in the dark, I was protecting you. Tony seems to think differently,” he glanced at the man in question who was pretending not to be listening as he brewed the drinks, “Perhaps I should listen to him, it seems as though I will be rectifying that this afternoon.” 

“That you are,” Tony confirmed discarding his charade, gestured them over, “Come on, take a seat. We’ve got a lot to get through.”

Thor gave Loki one final clap on the shoulder and headed to the seats. Loki hesitated, took a deep breath and followed. 

“Usually I would have provided something a little stronger for a chat like this, but I’m still trying for a ‘no drinking in the office’ record and I’m too close to ruin it for this,” Tony said almost apologetically as Loki and Thor took a seat across from him, “So, shall we just rip this bandaid right off? Thor, you wanna tell me what your dad told you? And Loki, you just chime in when you feel you can alright?”

Ignoring every instinct yelling at him to shake his head, get up and leave this whole situation, Loki nodded. He’d decided just yesterday that perhaps his own internally monologue may have been not so subtly leading him down the wrong path this whole time. He had to stay open to something else.

Thor waited until he had seen Loki nod before beginning, “Well, it took some convincing, but father confirmed everything you have both already told me. And after some discussion, he told me who it was that was Loki’s last target, here in New York.”

Loki said nothing, leaning on the arm of the sofa beside him, his mouth and chin resting on his fist, ignoring the concerned glances of both Thor and Tony. 

When he didn’t respond, Thor continued, “I didn’t recognize the name but I did some research, and it is part of the Titan Conglomerate.”

Just hearing the name twisted something in Loki’s gut and he closed his eyes on the exhale. If his initial target was under a different name, maybe Odin didn’t know who he had been challenging all those years ago. 

There was a short pause before Tony spoke, “I know them.”

At that, Loki’s eyes snapped open and locked onto Tony. The man’s face had taken on a slightly ashen shade and he moved his gaze from Thor to Loki as he realized his eyes were on him, “I take that to mean more than just in passing?”

Tony sniffed and nodded, running his hand through his hair with an exaggerated nonchalance that indicated he felt anything but, “Yeah, I...” he went quiet for a moment rethinking his words, “You remember I said I very nearly became one of those monsters?”

Loki nodded. 

“Well, it was their contract that I was going to sign,” he swallowed, “They are professional bastards with fingers in every stinking pie there is, both legitimate and not. Their weapons program was ambitious to say the least, at the time it was intriguing, but looking back...I’m sure I don’t have to tell you just how awful these people are.”

Loki’s mouth dropped open a little, his brow creasing ever so slightly, “They never told me any of this when they gave me your file,” he paused and sat forward, a strange new fire lit in his belly, “Did you work with Thanos?”

“Yeah, I remember that big bald brute, only met him once or twice though, most of my commination was through his PA. I don’t actually remember that guy’s name. Short guy, looked like he was dying.”

“What do you know about them?” Loki asked eagerly, “I’ve been blinkered to them from the moment I started.”

Tony narrowed his eyes as he thought, “Not a lot, they were cagey, wanted my secrecy contracted in before they would discuss anything with me. I wouldn’t be surprised if we knew about as much as each other.”

Thor glanced between the two of them, “Does this information help you?” he asked, not really directing the question to either of them in particular. 

Tony and Loki held each other’s gaze. Loki still had no idea how this could help, they were still in the same situation they were half an hour ago, except now there was a name to hovering sense of dread that overshadowed him. Tony, on the other hand, had glint in his eye that matched the soft hitch of his lip. 

After a second, he broke eye contact and looked to Thor, ”Well, it’s a hell of a lot easier to dig up dirt on someone once you’ve got their name.”

Loki frowned a little, “What do you mean?”

Tony relaxed back into his chair, “We know who they are, we know they’re rotten, how hard can it be to get proof of what they’ve been up to?”

Loki scoffed, “Harder than you might think Tony.”

“A walking talking compendium of their last six years of assholery seems like a pretty good way to start,” Tony raised an eyebrow at him. 

Incredulous, Loki leant forward in his seat, “Don’t you think if I had enough evidence of what they do to indict them, I would have taken it to the police by now?”

“I’m sure you would have. But you haven’t got the kind of toys that I do,” Tony gave a wink, with that infectious confidence that could convince you to walk off a cliff and everything would be ok on the other side, “You’ve trusted me this far haven’t you?”

Loki exhaled and he glanced sideways at Thor who was regarding him carefully. Could this actually work? Could the three of them work out some way of doing what Loki had wasted years trying to do? And all it had taken was a little admission. He searched Tony’s bright, open gaze, noting the excitement there, the glittering of ideas as Tony was beginning to come to the solution to a problem. It was a beautiful sight. The sight of a man who was risking so much because  _he didn’t want Loki to go_. 

Maybe, just maybe, this was the one good thing that he had earnt from his years of survival. 

As the thought crossed his mind, he smiled to himself and then to Tony and Thor. 

“What was that phrase you used Tony?” Loki’s smile pulled into a grin at Tony’s mild confusion, “Game on.”


	23. Chapter 23

In the excitement of the weekend, Tony had almost entirely forgotten about the military dinner that Rhodey had invited him to. He was only reminded by a quick phonecall from Rhodey himself. Of course, Tony made no mention of the fact he had forgotten, waiting until Rhodey had hung up before scrabbling from the workshop, up to spur on Loki who until that point been working peacefully in the penthouse.  

Once the initial rush to get ready subsided, a disquiet that had settled in his lower gut at the first reminder of this dinner began to get a little louder. Afterall, he couldn’t imagine a much more obvious trigger for his anxiety than reliving the whole thing in third person. But Rhodey had been the one to literally save his life, it seemed worth the risk of an attack to be there as he got officially recognised for it.  Besides, he thought to himself as he glanced over to where Loki was adjusting his waistcoat in one of the full-length mirrors of his bedroom, he had his own secret weapon now. He smiled to himself and went back to deliberating watch choices, studying the array of thirty or so largely similar watch faces peering back up at him. 

“The Breitling,” Loki commented from across the room, watching him in the mirror.  

“What makes you say that?” Tony asked, curiously.  

“Because it’s the one I can see and we’re going to be late if you spend any longer agonizing over it,” he replied pointedly, one eyebrow raised as he turned away from the mirror and regarded him properly. 

“Hey, I’m allowed to be late to my own anxiety hell,” Tony replied, nonetheless picking up the Breitling and beginning the arduous process of trying to fasten it.  

“You know it’s not too late to not go,” Loki said after a moment, taking a guess at why this whole process had taken so much longer than usual. It was an accurate guess, as usual.  

Tony scowled at the needlessly complex strap, “Yeah, it is.” 

Seeing the struggle, Loki crossed to where he was in just a couple of strides, “Here, let me,” he held out his hand and Tony presented the wrist with the watch balanced over the top of it. 

There was a beat of silence as he watched Loki study the strap with a mildly confused frown before his long fingers went to work, “Thanks for coming with, by the way,” Tony said, quickly, “I know what this kind of exposure might do to you.” 

Loki shrugged one shoulder, his focus remaining on the watch, “I’ve been attending these sorts of events my whole life, I know how to navigate them without gaining attention by the wrong people. Remember your charity gala?” he looked up and met Tony’s gaze as the clasp finally snapped closed, but didn’t let go of his hand, “Besides, someone has to be there to what was it? Hold your hand, while you quietly dissociate?” he said it with that relaxed smile that Tony found so comforting and he returned it in kind. Loki’s smile did become a little more serious after a second as he asked, “But on a serious note, is there anything I should know? Anything I can do to make this easier for you?” 

Tony scoffed, “Make it easier? No, it’s gonna be hell no matter what there is there, and I don’t know how I’m gonna react,” Tony shrugged as casually as he could manage, “Worst case scenario, I’ll go full panic attack and bolt. I guess the only thing you could do is track me down and drag me back to reality.” 

Loki nodded, but Tony could see that soft crease between his eyes as the sign that he wasn’t entirely comforted by his answer. 

“What are you worried about?” Tony asked, lightheartedly scowling up at him, “I'm the damaged one, you just have to be my handler for the night. Think you can do that?” 

The soft frown softened a little as Loki ran his eyes over him deliberately slowly, “I’ve handled worse I’m sure,” with that he gripped Tony’s hand a little tighter and pulled him forward into a kiss. 

Tony closed his eyes and relished the warmth of his lips, the smoothness of his skin, the wafts of expensive cologne drifting through the air. He felt Loki’s free hand rising up to slip around the nape of his neck. Tony’s hand snaked around Loki’s waist and pulled him against him. It was brief, but delicious, as so many of these were. Loki lifted his head away slightly, and murmured, “We should go, there’s only so fashionably late you can be to military affair. I’ve heard that they can be quite strict on their timings.” 

Tony scowled, though his gaze was still fixed on Loki’s lips.  

Loki chuckled to himself and took a step backwards, leading Tony from the room, “Come on, the car they sent will be waiting.” 

They arrived as fashionably late as one could be to a military affair, walking into the main room just as people were being ushered to their assigned seats. The seating plan was made up of ten or twelve large round tables, each one seating up to twelve people. A stage area was set up at the front of the room with a microphone in front of a large white projector screen that was cycling through a number of military stock photos. Tony paused in the doorway and took a deep, calming breath.  

Thankfully, Rhodey spotted them as they arrived and was quick to greet them. Tony presented as calm an exterior as possible, though how well it came across, he couldn’t be sure. Meanwhile, Loki was apparently in his element. He walked casually beside Tony as they were led to their table by Rhodey, glancing about the crowds with a disinterested curiosity, probably going through a number of evaluative processes yet still easily riding the level of staying close enough to be associated but not so close as to feel intrusive on the conversations of Tony and Rhodey as they walked. Tony took his cues from him, relying on his comforting presence to quash the heavy feeling niggling at the back of his mind. If Loki could be fine, he could be fine.  

“You sure you’re alright with this?” Rhodey asked as they came to a stop at their table situated close to the back of the room, near the bar. Sometimes he wondered if Rhodey knew him a little too well. Its other occupants were already present and there was a burst of excitement over their faces as the three of them had approached. Small talk with strangers was not what something he was interested in this evening. But the awkward exchanges weren’t necessary. Loki had swept in ahead of them, introducing himself and engaging them in conversation apparently so distracting, they barely spared Tony a glance once it started.   

“Will you stop worrying, you sound like Steve,” Tony replied to Rhodey, plucking the complimentary champagne from the table and taking a sip as he watched Loki talk with these people, making a mental note to convey his gratitude later.  

“Well, if you start feeling shaky, you’ve got your very own emergency exit,” he pointed off to the side where a set of double doors sat closed.  

Tony nodded and waved it off, “Sure, sure, don’t you have a speech to be practicing?” 

“There's no speeches Tony,” Rhodey muttered, then looked up as Loki rejoined them from the conversations he had been having, “Look after him.” 

Loki gave a single nod so exaggerated it was almost a bow, “I suspect that is the sole reason I've been allowed to attend.” 

Rhodey chuckled warmly, “Glad to see you’ve recovered by the way. I’ll catch up with you guys later!” 

And with that, he headed off across the room and disappeared behind the curtains that flanked the sides of the stage. Once he was gone, Tony turned to fix Loki with a single raised eyebrow, which Loki responded to with a ‘well am I wrong?’ expression, smirked and took his own seat, fluidly starting up a new conversation with the other guests as he did so.  

The whole ceremony started not long after that. Tony had attended a few in his time in as military contractor and they were usually all very boring. Just a string of severe people recounting the immense achievements of other rather severe people with stretches of flashy promo video in between. And for the first half, the same could be said for this one. Though it was made somewhat easier by having Loki occasionally lean in, rest a hand on his thigh and mutter some amusing observation about the speaker or one of the guests, especially once the hand remained in place after he leant away again. Whether his calm demeanor was real or an exaggerated charade for Tony’s sake he couldn’t be sure, but either way, by the interlude, he could barely remember why he had been so concerned about this in the first place.  

Loki excused himself not long after the short break was announced, promising not to leave him alone too long. Tony watched him go over the lip of the whiskey glass he’d gotten to replace the champagne on the table.  

“How you doing, Tony?” the voice of Rhodey drew him from his appreciative gaze as the man took a seat in Loki’s now empty place.  

“Fine, mom, thanks for checking in,” Tony replied, swiveling in his seat to face him, “Looks like I’m cured. Told you I’d get over it eventually. I don’t know what the big deal, this mental health thing is a breeze.” 

Rhodey rose a skeptical eyebrow, “Uh huh...well don’t get ahead of yourself. The next section is gonna be hard. They’ve put helmet cam footage of when we picked you up into the presentation.” 

Tony froze mid-swig as his stomach twisted and suddenly the taste of whiskey didn’t seem so appealing, “What kind of footage?” 

“Less than thirty seconds, when we spotted you in the desert then getting you in the chopper,” Rhodey explained, “Just thought you should get a heads up. In terms of reliving your trauma, probably couldn’t get much worse than this. Feel free to sit this next half out and join us for the after party if you need.” 

It could have been worse, it could have been the footage of the initial attack on the convoy. But still, the idea of seeing footage of himself in the sorry state he was after his escape attempt was not exactly comforting. Tony swallowed back the bubble of fear and covered it with a shallow cough, shuffling in his seat, then leaned forward to Rhodey slightly, as though about to share a secret, “Do I get royalties for the showing of this footage?” 

“Tony, are you ever going to take this seriously?” 

Tony affected an offended look, “I am taking it seriously, I won’t be cheated out of my rightful dues. I can get my people to speak to your people, hash out the decimal points et cetera.” 

With a sigh, Rhodey shook his head.  

“Besides, I can’t sit this out, I’m still hoping for some kind of surprise award for doing most of your job you,” Tony took a swig from his glass, doing everything to mask the welling fear. It was one thing to go to therapy, talk through what happened, work with the military (albeit reluctantly), or even experience nightmares. He’d done all that, that was fine. It was quite another thing watch a video of yourself in the very situation that caused you the spiral in the first place.  

“Well, keep hoping,” Rhodey commented, standing and heading back to the stage.  

As soon as he was gone, Tony let his smile drop. 

He flinched as a hand came to rest on his shoulder, only to calm quickly as Loki appeared in his peripheral, a fresh drink in his hand and a slight frown on his forehead. 

“Is everything alright Tony?” he asked as he retook his seat.  

“It was, until you came back without a drink for me,” Tony replied, recovering quickly.  

“You fret so readily,” Loki chastised playfully, “Yours is on its way, they didn’t have your brand on hand, it will be along in a minute. So, while we’re waiting, are you going to tell me why you’re suddenly so pale?” 

Tony took a second to work out whether he was going be able to talk his way around this one, but as he held Loki’s naturally intense green gaze, he realized that this was the one person that he couldn’t lie to, even if he wanted to. And so he explained in as few words as possible what might come up on the screen and just how badly Tony may well react.  

Loki nodded with that unique air of calm understanding and glanced off to the side where the door was, “Should anything happen, I’m sure we can make a quick exit.” 

“You don’t want to stay and watch me stumble through the desert?” Tony asked. It was unusual that anyone was so apparently disinterested in Tony’s Afghan experience.  

Loki shrugged and leant back into his chair, “I can think of many more enjoyable ways to see you hot, sweaty, and barely able to walk,” he shot him a devious smile, and then looked back to the stage, “Though I would be loath to miss someone else I don’t know walk to the middle of the stage and walk away again,” he said, sarcastically, leaving Tony still unable to tell whether it was genuine or an act. 

Either way, Tony smiled to himself as the lights dimmed, deciding not to question it too much. The ends justified the means and the end result was that Tony was not as close to panicking as he may have been should he not have shared the information. He did notice though that as the speaker returned to the stage Loki had moved his chair a little closer to Tony’s and the hand rested light on his thigh. Its proximity to his crotch may have been a distraction technique was but Tony wasn’t about to ask him to move it.  

The second half was almost entirely similar to the first for the first thirty minutes and once again the two of them passed their own time murmuring comments to each other. It was only when the speaker stepped up and began to talk about a special honor to be awarded that Tony’s attention was drawn away from the lewd comment that Loki was making.  

“Two years ago, a convoy was attacked in the desert of Afghanistan,” the speaker said somberly, resulting the tragic deaths of fine men and women and the taking of civilian consultant Tony Stark.” 

The images flashed across Tony’s mind before he could stop them. Of the jeeps, the people, the kid who’d asked for a selfie just seconds before the- 

He was cut off from his thoughts as he felt Loki’s hand tighten on his leg and he heard Loki’s voice speak softly, “Tony, stay with me. You can handle this.” 

Tony took a deep breath, “I’m here.” 

“Colonel James Rhodes volunteered without hesitation to lead the operation to hunt down these people and bring Mr Stark home,” the speaker continued in the background.  

On the projector screen, a series of images of Rhodey stood in a room amongst banks of computers, peering at screens, going over maps, giving commands.  

“Two months of intense, painstaking work, brought about only through Colonel Rhodes incredible leadership, determination, and drive to never give up,” more images of Rhodey, on an airfield, sharing documents with others, “And finally they got the break they needed, from the ingenuity of Tony Stark himself no less.” 

With that, the speaker stepped aside and the images on the screen transitioned to running film. Aerial footage of the desert sped past, taken from a jet juding by the speed of the movement. The robotic voices of pilots talking through radio played through the speakers, Tony couldn’t make out what they were saying. Though he was transfixed on the screen, he kept focused on the sensation of Loki’s hand on his leg, the man’s casual posture posture beside him. He tried to follow his lead, if Loki was ok, he could be ok.  

The sound of an explosion echoed through the speakers. Several members of the audience gasped audibly. Tony had known it was coming, but that didn’t stop the flinch as a fireball erupted in the periphery of the footage. It was a fireball he knew well, since he was the one that caused it. He’d never seen it from another angle before. It had seemed so much bigger at the time... 

At his sudden movement, Loki leant in to him, pressing his shoulder against Tony’s, if only in a reminder of his presence. 

Tony clenched his jaw and embraced the sensation still not able to tear his gaze away from the screen.  

The footage shifted suddenly to take on the perspective of a man leaning out of the side of a helicopter that was descending. This was the helmet cam footage Rhodey was talking about. At the realization, Tony felt his breath catch in his throat,  as the camera panned back and forth over the desert until it came to a stop on a lone figure stumbling through the sand.  

His eyes went wide as adrenaline flooded his system without warning, triggering a flight or fight response he was not prepared for.  

His chest tightened. The noise of the helicopter reverberated around the room, pounding relentlessly into his head. Memories flashed across his mind and his vision started to blur and throb. He had to get out of here. He couldn’t be in this room anymore. He felt his breathing start to rasp out his throat. His heartbeat was racing. His brain screamed at him to stand, to run, to get away from this, from everything, but his legs ignored him. He was starting to spiral.  

“Tony,” Loki’s voice cut through his thoughts with a quiet authority he rarely heard from the man. He felt a hand slip over the top of his own and grip it firmly, “Tony, stay here with me. Focus on my voice, focus on your breathing. Do you hear me?” 

Tony forced his gaze away from the screen before he could get a good look at the state he had been in when they had found him. He ticked it sideways to Loki, who was watching him through an emotionless mask, before dropping to the table in front of him. 

“Just breathe.” 

Tony did as he was told. Inhales through the nose, exhales through the mouth with a short pause in between. Recorded voices were still playing through the speakers, his own shouting included in the dissonance of noise. But somehow, the soft commands of Loki nearby were louder than any of that. He focused on the sound, the feeling on his hands, one on his leg and the other gripped in his own. The quiet confidence that exuded from the man as some calming forcefield. Slowly, his breathing came under control and the tightness in his chest relented a little.  

“And that is why, Colonel James Rhodes is receiving this special honour today,” the speaker announced, to be greeted with uproarious applause. After a moment to ensure he was through the worst of what would happen, he lifted his gaze to the stage. The image on the screen was frozen on a moment he remembered vividly. He and Rhodey knelt in the sand, embracing, it was the moment he knew he was truly safe.  

Rhodey came striding across the stage, appearing from the side of the stage and Tony joined the applause. As the medal was pinned to Rhodey’s chest, Tony stood, sparking a standing ovation that spread around the room. True to his word, there was no speech, but as he saluted the speaker and then turned to the audience briefly, Tony could see the barely restrained smile as he realized Tony had made it through the evening. But military protocols were still to be followed and Rhodey exited the stage almost as quickly as he had entered it.   

Tony slumped back into his seat once the man had disappeared, finished his whiskey in one quick swig and leant his elbows on the table, rubbing the bridge of his nose, as the familiar post-anxiety fatigue washed over him. He rested his forehead in his hands as order was slowly regained on the room and the speaker stepped forward once again. 

Loki leant into him as the speaker began his closing words, “I fail to see what anyone was worried about.” 

Tony turned his head slightly to regard Loki with a tired ‘are you serious’ expression, but Loki merely smiled at him and then returned his attention to the speaker, relaxing back into his chair as though nothing at all had happened. That smug, beautiful bastard. 

**** 

As the ceremony began to shift from formal awarding to less formal celebratory drinks, Loki allowed himself to relax a little. Tony had fared so much better than he had ever expected and now that he was distanced from the military formality, he seemed to have recovered as though nothing had happened.  

Once the drinks had started, Loki had deliberately given Tony his space. He stayed close by until they had met up with the newly medalled Rhodey and then Loki had left them to it. This was not Loki’s world and having a shadow would likely only be an irritation to them. So instead, Loki posted himself close to the bar and was content to people watch from afar. He wasn’t sure where it had come from but there was an immense amount of pride that welled up as he watched Tony move through the crowd, shaking hands with people, entering conversations, grinning and laughing at jokes, swimming through the crowd as though it was water. Everyone seemed to want a piece of him and yet it was Loki that had the honor of Tony’s searching gaze as he scanned the crowd to find him. Once their eyes met, there would be a knowing smirk and return to the conversation.  

This was a snapshot of the life that was now dangling tantalizingly close. After Tony had given him an offer to stay, Loki could barely think of anything else. It was hard to imagine that this could be his reality, one of those things that seemed far too good to be true. Here Tony was, handsome, intelligent, kind, caring, vulnerable, and yet willing to bend over backwards to help Loki out of his situation. It was a compassion that extended not only to Loki, that much was clear in the lengths he was willing to go to, simply to be present as his friend received an award.  

It was just another reason to add to the ever-growing list of reasons that Loki lov- 

He closed his eyes as the thought tried to form in his mind, shutting it away. One step at a time. There would be time to consider that train of thought further once Thanos was out of the picture. But that opportunity would not come that if he did not stop trying to protect himself from imagined threats.  

He swallowed the last of his drink and began to manoeuvre through the crowd to where Tony was talking with three other men before he could change his mind. Tony saw him approach and smiled in greeting as Loki rested a hand on Tony’s back and addressed the men he had been talking to, “Excuse me gentlemen, may I please borrow Mr Stark from you for a moment?” 

“Of course you can,” Tony replied for them, “So sorry gentlemen, we shall have to continue this at a later date.” 

With that, Tony turned away and the two of them found their way to a quiet corner of the room where Tony leant against the wall, “Thanks for the save, not sure how much longer that conversation could have carried on...” 

Loki chuckled, “I must have underestimated your acting ability, you seemed perfectly at ease,” Loki glanced back over the crowd the two of them had just emerged from, spotting the three men now talking amongst themselves, looking only slightly peeved to have been interrupted.  

“Ugh, they’re sniffing around for new military contracts, as if tonight has done anything other than make me consider minor bordering on major illegalities just to end the ones I still have,” Tony grumbled, through a false grin as he gave the men one last acknowledgement before turning fully to Loki, ”But anyway, what did you come out of your skulking for?” 

“I...I actually wanted to ask you something,” Loki started, suddenly unsure how to go about this. It was not a situation that came up often for him. 

“Yes,” Tony replied immediately.  

Loki blinked in surprise, “You don’t know the question.” 

“Oh, were you not about to ask me to sneak back-stage for a quickie?” Tony asked, looking genuinely surprised. 

Loki chuckled and shook his head, his nerves immediately eased by Tony’s easy joking, “Sorry to disappoint.” 

Tony shrugged and sipped from his drink, “Well the night’s still young. Go on then, ask your boring question.” 

Loki took a deep breath, “Did you mean what you said, when you told me that you wanted me to stay?” 

“Mmhm,” Tony answered, firmly, while looking out over the crowd, “And I still do. Why? You considering it?” 

Loki exhaled, as a range of doubts skimmed over his mind but they seemed trivial as he stood with Tony, who was scanning the crowd in an attempt to avoid his gaze. One of those quirks he had when he was nervous about the answer to a question. Loki smiled to himself, “I might be.” 

“Might be?” Tony brought his attention back to Loki, one eyebrow arched, “Where’s the might coming from? You worried I’ll change my mind?” 

Loki’s smile faltered a little and he glanced away over the crowd, as Tony once again inferred his thoughts irritatingly easily, “Historically, very few people have wanted me to stay anywhere. And fewer of those had simple companionship as their reason.” 

Tony regarded him impassively for a moment, then took a drink as though thinking something over, “You’re right to be concerned,” he started. Loki snapped his attention back as that niggling voice began to shout, that is until he saw Tony’s smirk and the man continued, “It’s not like I don’t know literally everything about you. You know, the lying, the spying, the stealing. Worst of all, that irritating proclivity for cold showers. I mean could you at least put the temperature back once you’re done?” he pulled a disgusted face at the final concept, “I can see why you’re worried something will come up that makes me reconsider.” 

“You certainly enjoy out-rationalizing my concerns, don’t you?”  

“Says the man who talked me down from a panic attack as I watched the footage of my own trauma,” Tony replied easily, holding his gaze with a victorious half-smile. 

“I concede the point,” Loki said quietly averting his gaze again, but struggled for anything else to say.  

As though sensing his hesitation, Tony tilted his head, “L, look at me.” Loki did as he was instructed, that warm rush at the pet name, intensifying as he met Tony’s earnest genuine gaze. “If you still have secrets that I don’t know about, then hell, kudos to you. Keep ‘em. If I don’t know them now, I doubt I ever will and quite frankly I could care less. I want you to stay and I’ll reassure you of that any time you ask, but first and foremost, I want you to be able to decide what you want you to do. Because despite what you think, that’s what you deserve.” 

Loki’s forehead creased as he felt his stomach tighten. He open his mouth to deny it, remind Tony of the monster he was, but Tony continued, deliberately interrupting the attempt at self-deprecation.  

“You’re brilliant, you’re smart, you’re funny and you’re wrapped up in one of the hottest packages I could have asked for. But most importantly, despite everything you’ve been through, you’re still fighting to get shot of where you are,” he paused as Loki clenched his jaw. It was irritating that hearing words of praise had so much more of an impact on his demeanour than insults ever could, but he didn’t stop Tony talking, “Thanos is a nasty mother, I know how manipulative his is from personal experience. You already know he would have had me sign away my soul, were it not for a few well-placed missiles. And that was after just over eighteen months of his time. So, the fact you’ve been on his leash for six years and you’re still trying to bite the hand that feeds you? Well, it’s a strength I would kill for. And if tonight is any example, it’s a strength that I would be keen to keep around. But only if you want to.” 

Loki exhaled slowly, and gave an uncertain chuckle, taken aback but the intensity of the man’s words, “Tony...I...” 

“Speechless? I know, what can I say, I tend to have that effect on people,” Tony replied with a half-shrug, “Don’t worry about it. I’m about six drinks in and I’ve gotten to the point where my fear that it isn’t reciprocated doesn't matter, you need to know you have people on your side, and they’re not trying to get anything out of you for it.” 

That nervousness that had tried to grip Loki’s mind, slipped and melted away as he smiled, finally finding the words, “Your fear is unfounded Tony.” The words were obviously unexpected as Tony blinked in surprise. “I’ve danced around the topic for an unfair length of time given the candour that you have shown me, partially burying it from even myself. I wanted to dismiss it as merely a saviour complex or perhaps something similar. But it has become excruciatingly evident that this is not just some passing sensation,” he paused to make sure the wording he had was right before continuing and that the gravity of his message was being conveyed. Judging by the way that Tony stood frozen, regarding him intently, it seemed to be getting through. “I have not felt so safe, so at ease with anyone in my entire life, not even before Thanos. And it’s not the circumstances under which we met nor the complexity of the situation we now share. It is you, Tony Stark, in your entirety, that has brought about feelings that, honestly I’m not sure I fully appreciate yet.” 

Tony’s gaze was transfixed on him, an air of disbelief about him he only barely concealed. 

“If by some miracle we succeed in what we are attempting to do, I would very much like to take you up on your offer if only to see just how deep these feelings can go,” he finished with a confident smile which grew as he watched Tony struggle for words to respond, “Speechless? I understand, I can have that effect on people too when I so wish.” 

Recovering, Tony’s disbelief formed a smile that looked almost relieved, “Don’t get cocky big guy. I’m just surprised you could be so soppy.”  

"I've had nothing to be sentimental about until you,” Loki replied, his smile still holding strong as he leant in to whisper in Tony’s ear, “Now, I don’t want to drag you away from your friend, but perhaps you could spare me a little time to...celebrate our new plans? Perhaps backstage?” 

He felt Tony tense a little as he spoke then set his half-empty glass on the tray of a passing waiter, “I suppose I can spare a little time,” he said hurriedly, already setting off through the crowd, with enough confidence that Loki would be following that he didn’t even look back  

Loki paused, smiling softly to himself before following into the crowd. This could be his life, legitimately attending these functions in the company of a great man who cared for him, for whom he cared for. It was so close and he was going to fight tooth and nail to get it. 


	24. Chapter 24

There was a cautious excitement in his gut as Loki stood outside the door that Tony so often disappeared beyond for hours at a time. This was his inner sanctum, his temple, the most important place in the world to him, and as far as Loki knew, the only person that Tony let see its interior was Jarvis. That is until Jarvis had passed on a message that Tony wanted Loki to take a break from his work and go down to meet him there and Loki wasn’t about to question it too deeply. Ulterior motive or no, the secretive contents of Tony’s workshop had been a persistent curiosity but the fragility of the trust that Tony had in him was enough to prevent any unnecessary questions. 

Glass replaced stone of the walls almost as soon as Loki stepped through the doorway, flanking both sides of the staircase, and ended in a single glass door at the base of the stairs. As he descended, Tony’s workshop began to reveal itself through the transparent walls. It was a brightly lit open plan room, a theme that apparently seeped into all of Tony’s interior decorating, which seemed to be about the same size as the floor above. There were no windows, just an omnipresent glow of light emanating from the ceiling and from behind certain panels in the wall. Through the wall to his left, he could see worktops pressed up against the outer wall, separated out into workstations usually centered about a single bulky piece of equipment, a few of which he recognized, but most that he didn’t. All of them clean and clear, neatly laid out. In contrast, a number of cabinets of varying sizes were clustered haphazardly together in the central space, as though having been recently pushed there. When he looked to the right, he saw what he assumed to be reason for the sudden rearrangement of storage space.  

A circular tube of metal took up most of the right side of the room, with a diameter so big it looked as though it rested against the wall in places. It was bulky and clearly unfinished with spikes of metal and exposed wires jutting out at random angles, waiting to receive their counterparts from the pile of parts and curved metal panels that were leant up against one wall. A network of thick cables of varying colors crisscrossed the floor like webbing, and it took a moment of searching before Loki followed them back to the origin point, a relatively new looking hole in one of the concrete outer walls where the cables all coalesced into one thick snake and disappeared into the darkness beyond the wall. The reason for the sledge hammering saga, Loki supposed.  

Tony was stood over the tube with his back to the staircase, apparently oblivious to Loki’s presence. Loki took a moment to admire the soft definitions of Tony’s shoulder blades left uncovered by the black tanktop that was his ’workshop outfit’, before taking the last few steps to reach the door. There was no way of physically opening it that Loki could see, but as he reached it, it slid away with a soft hiss.  

“Admiring the view?” Tony quipped, taking a moment to finish fiddling with something then turning to Loki, eyebrow raised and knowing smirk on his face. There was a streak of something black over his temple but Loki decided not to mention it.  

The door slid shut behind him as he entered the room, gazing around before taking a couple of casual steps towards a nearby worktop that caught his attention with a what appeared to be a selection of electrical components strewn over it, “Well, there appears to be some impressive technology in this room. I’m afraid there is a measure of professional curiosity that I’m not sure will ever fade.” 

Tony grunted in response and glanced around the room absently then looked back to Loki who had picked up one of the smaller, more benign looking objects and was inspecting it, “Hey, hands in pockets, Moriarty.” 

“Don’t trust me?” Loki smirked but replaced the component and adhered to Tony’s request nonetheless. 

Tony plucked a square of cloth from the same work top and wiped his hands off on it before tossing it back onto the table haphazardly, “Don’t take it personally, I barely trust me in this room. How’s it feel to get into the VIP room though? Not many people get to come down here. Impressed?” 

Loki continued to run his eyes over every part of the room as he answered, “Conflicted.” 

Tony frowned a question, “Not what I expected.” 

“Well, two months ago, everything I did was to try and trick you into letting me down here, but that was because Thanos wanted me to,” Loki wandered away from the table to get a closer look at the tube itself, “I must confess that at the time, I could not have cared less what it is that you actually did. But now that I have this immense curiosity and no reason to know?  Rightly or wrongly, it feels a little like one final test to make sure I won’t be taking anything from you,” he shrugged and finally looked back to Tony, “Not I know what any of this is.” 

“You could always ask,” Tony offered, “Didn’t invite you down here just to admire me working. You get to do that the rest of the day. And don’t worry about the test thing, nothing leaves this room unless I’m with it. Simple algorithm not even a thief like you can get around.”  

Loki gave him a measured gaze, but the thought quickly flew from his mind as Tony stood with his hands slightly outstretched, welcoming as always, “Very well, what is this?” 

“You heard of CERN? Well, this is like that but considerably smaller,” Tony told him as he ducked under the tube. 

“Why do you need a particle accelerator in your penthouse?” Loki asked as he bent to study some of the metal ring, “I would say it seems excessive but I don’t know that you understand the meaning of the word.” 

“Glad you’re finally understanding,” Tony replied over his shoulder as he crossed the empty space within the ring and ducked under the other side to a worktop that Loki hadn’t noticed, tucked away in the small space of one corner of the room. It almost empty with nothing but a set of four fist-sized constructions of metal and glass. Tony hesitated in front of the table, before plucking one of them from the top and bringing it back to where Loki was stood and began talking excitedly as he held it up, “This is the Heart. It’s a single point source of almost infinite energy that can be used to power anything from cars, to buildings, to cities. Even thought about experimenting with exosuits once or twice,” Loki smiled fondly as he watched Tony speak about his pride and joy, “Gonna revolutionize how we power things when it’s finished, but so far, it’s been burning through every element I've tried to fuel it with. So, I've had to delve into a little bit of molecular chemistry to try and make some new ones.” 

Loki narrowed his eyes at the bulb, the Heart, in Tony’s hand as an odd realization came over him, suppressing the impulse to reach out and take it. If it had been just a few weeks ago, standing face to face with Tony Stark in his personal testing faciliaty, being presented with one of the most sophisticated pieces of technology he had ever heard of, it was exactly where Thanos’s endgame would have started. He swallowed, feeling a little like an alcoholic being presented with a drink, “You know, this is probably what Thanos wants from you.” 

“Yeah, I suspected as much, Tony commented lightly, still turning it over in his hand as he ducked under the tube and headed back to the table.  

Loki watched him go, “And you’re content to just show it to me?”  

“Certainly, seems like it doesn’t it?” he smirked at him as he replaced the Heart back amongst the others that Loki now realized were largely just similar perhaps older versions of it, “Look, I’ve been working on this for nearly a year now and you cannot imagine how much it has been killing me that I can’t tell anyone about it.” 

“Actually, I probably can.” 

Tony continued, ignoring the comment as he returned from the table, “I figured, who better to tell then the guy with a the most to lose if he tells anyone.” 

Loki rose an eyebrow, playfully, “Is that a threat?”  

Tony gave an overexaggerated sigh as he stood upright and face Loki fully, “I guess we’ll see whether Thanos patents any revolutionary energy hardware in the next few weeks. Anyway, that’s not why I asked you down here,” with that, he walked past Loki and round to other half of the workshop.  

“There was a reason beyond your ego? I’m intrigued,” Loki commented as he followed, watching as Tony stopped at the only desk with any physical manifestation of computing technology and picked something up from it. He held it up to the light briefly before turning and holding out what looked like a simple watch battery, but Loki suspected it was not. Gingerly, Loki took it from Tony’s outstretched hand, “What is this?” 

Tony stuffed his hands in his pockets as Loki inspected the disc, “That is a little side project I started a long, long time ago. Archived it after the reshuffle. There weren’t too many philanthropic uses of that kind of spying equipment. I call it the Dot, after the passive recording equipment Amazon have started to trick people into putting in their houses.” 

Loki raised his eyebrow at him, deciding not to comment on the general existence of Jarvis, “That didn’t exactly answer my question.” 

“It’s a computer bug in physical form,” Tony elaborated, “Leave it in a room with a computer and it’ll read electromagnetic fields to generate and save a copy of any computer system it can find, including hard drive, network connections, and copies of installed software. The end result is a functional mimic that can be attached to any other machine and you can use it as though you’re on the copied computer. Didn’t take long to make it functional, but it’s not perfect, it’ll take a few days to mimic everything. Could’ve made it faster but I thought it would be useful to include a microphone,” when Tony had finished, he glanced up from the disc in Loki’s hand to glance over his expression, “What d’ya think?” 

Loki raised his eyebrows, mouth slightly open as he inspected the disc, marveling at just how the technology that Tony was describing could possibly be all within the small bit of metal. Every time he thought he was getting close to the extent of Tony’s genius, the man outdid himself.  

Apparently a little too impatient to wait for the penny to drop, Tony went on, “All you’d need to do is put it in the same room as Thanos’s computer or a computer on the same network, leave it for a while and it’ll copy everything he has. Then we get it back, we hunt through the files til we find the proof we need. There’ll be something in there we can use. Not exactly above board, probably wouldn’t hold up in any court, but we might just get enough to blackmail you off your leash.” 

Loki blinked and raised his eyes to meet Tony’s as the realization dawned on him. He was holding the answer to his prayers in his hand. After all of the hypotheticals, the ifs, the maybes, the hopes, for the first time he held some physical manifestation of how he could finally get out of this.  

“The flaw is that it does need to be physically carried into his office and then back out again. With a bit more time I could maybe give it remote transcription, but I don’t think I’d be able to do that soon enough and it’d been to be twice the size maybe,” Tony shrugged apologetically but when Loki didn’t respond he asked, “So, what do you think? Is it workable? Can you get this into his office or moldy cave, volcano lair, wherever Thanos sets up shop?” 

Loki laughed to himself, “Tony, you are brilliant.” 

“So I’ve heard. Can you use it?” 

“Though I do all I can to avoid going to the office, I’m sure there will be opportunity to plant it when the Wakanda situation inevitably does not go their way,” Loki held the disc between his thumb and forefinger, already pulling together a set of actions that could easily slip this somewhere hidden but easily retrievable, ”How close does it need to be to the machine itself?” 

Tony narrowed his eyes at the disc and looked as though he was doing some quick mental arithmetic, “Not sure yet, there’s some finetuning to get the measurements right, but I think ten feet, just to be sure. I’ll double check tomorrow while I’m waiting for a few tests to run on the doughnut.” 

Loki opened his mouth to ask a few more curious questions when a vibrating in his pocket cut him off. He spared Tony only the quickest glance before pulling his phone from his jeans pocket and pressing it to his ear.  

*** 

It hadn’t been a hard decision to invite Loki down here. After all, the guy had now seen more of Tony’s life than even Pepper at this point and the risk he would be taking paled in comparison the one Loki had taken in still being here. It only seemed fair. Besides the look of admiration and pure fascination on the man’s face at just the small explanation of the Heart he had given was glorious. The sudden dissipation of that expression upon a phonecall was heartbreaking.  

“I had not heard,” Loki answered a question Tony couldn’t hear, “Though Stark has been in meetings for most of the morning.” 

Even though he’d insisted on being present for as many of these conversations as possible, these one-sided conversations left Tony feeling helpless, stood in forced silence as Loki had to pretend that he was still their puppet. A stark reminder of the reality the guy was still living under. Just hearing Loki refer to him by his last name caused his stomach to tighten just a little.  

“Yes, I was aware of this external consultant, I did what I could but by his professional nature, he was not a particularly easy man to get close to,” Loki explained to whoever it was on the phone, once again inspecting the disc in his hand, “Rather than interrogating me, if you want a reason for this failure, I suggest you return your attention to the operative who was so obvious in the first place it warranted Wakanda to call for aid. I’ve wasted enough time on this as it is.” 

There was a pause as Loki listened and considered his response. 

“Yes, despite this interruption, I’ve made significant steps. The trust the man has in me is almost complete,” Loki spoke with a coldness to his voice that would have been worrying were it not for the small smile that Loki shot Tony’s way as he spoke, “I’m still at Stark Tower and he may return at any moment, I would prefer to keep this conversation brief if at all possible. If there is anything you want from me other than to inform me of what has transpired then just say so.” 

After another few seconds of listening, Loki hung up abruptly and ran a hand through his hair, jaw clenched as he narrowed his eyes in thought. There was an unusually sickly tinge to his skin. Whatever he had been told was not just the berating his usually received.  

“You want to tell me what just happened?” Tony asked when Loki didn’t speak after a couple of minutes. 

Loki licked his lips, nervously and looked at him, “Well...it appears that the Wakanda issue is no more.” 

“…And that’s a bad thing?” Tony inferred, doing his best to read Loki’s patented inscrutable expressions.  

“You’re not going to have time to calibrate this,” Loki told him holding up the disc, “Thanos wants to speak to me in person. Today.” 

“So why do you look like you’re going to throw up? You’ve been there loads of times before.” 

“Yes, but not to report to him directly,” Loki answered, quietly, almost distractedly, “I’ve only actually met the man himself a handful of times and none of them were pleasant experiences. But this may be an opportunity to get to Thanos’s machine and not just his lackey. It shouldn’t be wasted,” Loki seemed like he was talking primarily to himself, searching the floor as though the answers he was looking for might be built into the ceramic tiles. After a while, he looked to Tony again, “If I don’t come back-” 

Tony scowled and shook his head enough to cut off the rest of Loki’s sentence as a sudden fear sparked into his mind, bringing with it images of the black eye, busted lip, and broken ribs he’d had seared into his mind’s eye, “Wait, what’s that supposed to mean?” 

“Tony, let me finish” Loki said, calmly. 

“Don’t ‘Tony’ me, L,” Tony bit back, much less calm, “There is no ‘if I come back’. You’re either coming back or you’re not going.” 

“If I don’t go, he’ll just come looking for me here which I won’t end well for either of us. Besides, this was your idea and it’s the only plausible one we’ve had.” 

“Yeah, I know, this whole thing was my idea,” Tony almost snapped, more than a little irritated at how calm Loki appeared in the face of the concept of only possibly coming back. It wasn’t something that had even crossed Tony’s mind but now he couldn’t shake it, “And if something happens to you because of it then that’s on me. I won’t let it happen.” 

Loki tilted his head and a smirk on his face, “Will you let me finish what I was going to say or have you still got a little further to fall into that panic spiral?” 

Tony huffed but remained silent.  

“If I don’t come back, then you may have to go and get this thing back yourself, that’s all I was going to say. I’m sure you can find an excuse to go and see Thanos, new deal, information on me, anything you like,” Loki said in manner that made it seem as though what he was saying should soothe Tony’s worries. But it was doing anything but. Apparently seeing this, Loki took a step forward and took Tony’s hand, smiling, “As always, I appreciate your concern for my safety, but I will be fine. He will likely attempt to teach me a lesson, nothing I’ve not endured before, but I may be gone for a while.” 

“Define a while,” Tony demanded.  

“A week perhaps?” Loki sounded as though he had plucked a timescale from the air.  

“You expect me to just sit around and wait for a week?!” 

“Yes,” Loki said seriously, “If you react too soon, Thanos may catch on to what we’re doing. As far as you should know, I am a man with an exceptionally unusual work schedule who probably gone out of contact for this amount of time before. Under usual circumstances that would be the norm, and that is what we need to make Thanos keep believing.” 

“I’m not giving him a week’s head start on you.” 

“I’ve worked hard to make myself valuable to him, he’s not going to have me killed over this Wakanda issue,” Loki’s eyes ticked between Tony for a second, “Will you at least trust my judgement enough to last 72 hours before you do anything drastic?” 

“24,” Tony replied instantly. 

“This isn’t a negotiation, Tony.” 

“36.” 

Loki chuckled and shook his head a little in exasperation, “Fine, 36 hours, then you can bring in the cavalry. Now, do I need you to carry this out of the lab for me?” he held up the Dot.  

Tony glanced between the disc and Loki’s almost amused green eyes, taking comfort in his calmness. It was now or never he supposed, “Jarvis, new exception to workshop protocol 23a, Loki Laufeyson.” 

There was a beat before Jarvis acknowledged the programming change had been made.  

“That seems like an elaborate method of avoiding carrying something for me,” Loki said, closing his fist over the Dot, “Does that me I get to wander in and out of here as much I as want now?” 

Tony shrugged one shoulder, “No excuses not to make me a coffee now.” 

“I suppose not,” Loki nodded then the smile faded a little and he glanced over his shoulder at the door, “I should go, they’re expecting me any minute.” 

Tony clenched his teeth then exhaled, “You know if you don’t come back, I’ll be coming after you.” 

“I should hope so too,” Loki whispered, running his eyes over Tony’s face, as though trying to memorize it. Tony lifted his head and kissed him. 

It wasn’t often that Tony initiated these things, content to let Loki take the lead on almost every part of the physical side of the relationship. And so, when their lips met, there was a split second of surprised hesitation before Loki relaxed into it. He let go of Tony’s hand to cup the nape of his neck, fingers cool against his skin, as the other rested on his hip, still partially clenched around the Dot that would be their ticket out of this mess if the all went according to plan. Tony’s hand slipped around Loki’s waist and held his slim torso possessively against him, keen to make sure that Loki knew that he meant everything he’d said over the last few weeks. Loki leant against him, bending a little to equal their heights, and Tony concentrated on the sensation, committing it to memory to mute the soft ringing of fear now sounding in the back of his mind.  

Loki would be coming back, Tony told himself, it was just a matter of what Tony would have to do to make that happen.  

Eventually, Loki broke away from the kiss, and rested his forehead against Tony’s, both of them a little breathless, “I must go, Tony,” he said, regretfully, “I’ll be back as soon as I can.” 

With that, Loki pressed a soft kiss to Tony’s forehead and turned to the door to the workshop, striding with an air of confidence that as usual left Tony wondering whether it was genuine or merely a show for his benefit. Either way, Loki didn’t look back.  

“Jarvis, set a 36 hour timer will you?” 

“Already done, sir.” 

 


	25. Chapter 25

Despite his promise, it had taken Tony less than ten minutes to decide that, actually, he’d never agreed not to track Loki this time, and have Jarvis set up a three-dimensional wire frame outline of New York City for a little red dot to move through, tracking the GPS in Loki’s phone. With that waylaying some of his more immediate concerns, he was able to continue to in the workshop for another couple of hours glancing occasionally at blinking red dot that was Loki as it moved through the city. After a little bit, it arrived at an office building Tony didn’t recognize, but made sure to commit to memory, and proceeded to the 15th floor. And that is where it remained for the rest of the morning. Tony almost lost interest in it as he continued putting together the accelerator, but it wasn’t long before he realized that perhaps Loki remaining in the exactly the same place was not the best sign.  

By mid-afternoon, Tony had to abandon any form of delicate working as his imagination distracted him with images of what Loki could have meant by ‘teach him a lesson’. None of them were good. With a deep sigh, he downed tools and ascended the stairs to the penthouse, where Jarvis had already re-positioned the model of the city. The red dot was still in the same place.  

In an attempt to force his thoughts away, Tony decided to try to catch up on some of the phone calls he needed to make to keep on top of what the rest of the company was doing. Something that, realistically, he should be doing a lot more often than in the admittedly rare times that his boyfriend was out of contact, talking to an employer who may well be beating him senseless as he spoke. But talking to other people was often the easiest way to distract himself. He checked in with Bruce, and Steve, and Pepper, as well as the other heads of departments who were a little more periphery to his central operation. The conversation with Thor was a little difficult, but Tony managed to navigate it almost without mentioning his brother once. It was a distraction plan that was working well enough until he got to T’Challa’s name on his list.  

Tony did his best to be happy for them as T’Challa and Shuri excitedly relayed the news of their success, pretending as though Loki had not already informed him, and the conversation turned to planning the finer details of their joint venture. He was doing a decent job of pretending as well, until T’Challa mentioned the possibility of involving ‘Vogel’ permanently in their arrangement. At his mention, the sickness in Tony’s stomach spiked suddenly. He managed to continue a little further, placating them with vague promises of ‘I’ll ask’ but eventually, it was enough to shut down the conversation.  

As the day dragged into evening and eventually night, that sickness did not get any better. The blip had not moved all day and the prospect that they had already taken Loki someplace else and simply left his phone behind was beginning to dawn on him.  

Tony quickly dismissed the idea of sleep. He barely got any at the best of times when Loki wasn’t around let alone while he was worried about the guy’s safety. Besides, he needed to be ready if they tried to move Loki outside of his little map. So, he poured himself a coffee and set up on the sofa, with the television on for background noise as he watched the map intently.  

Images of Loki’s recent injuries continued to flash across his mind in the split seconds where his eyes drooped closed before he forced them open again. It was a long night watching that dot remain stubbornly in one place.  

It was still there when dawn broke the following day, eighteen hours into Tony’s vigil. Before the sun had even fully reached over the horizon, Tony sent a message to Pepper and Steve, politely informing them that he would not be disturbed today, under any circumstances. They didn’t question it.  

That perpetual sickness only grew worse as the time passed. The only thing that helped was to beginning to think about how he would be getting the man back. He drafted messages to Clint and Natasha, ready to be sent should the need arise. The notes were easy enough, the pair of them rarely needed an explanation from him for their work, always ready to drop what they were doing and assist him in whatever he needed. Tracking people was their speciality. He’d brought them on the moment he returned from Afghanistan and he had made sure they were the best of the best. There had been a couple of near misses that where only knocked off target by their quick thinking.  

The message to Thor explaining the situation would need a little more consideration however.  

It was nearly thirty hours from Loki first leaving before anything changed in the map.  

Tony thought he had imagined it at first, thinking he had seen movement out of the corner of his eye, he snapped his gaze up from his third draft of a message to Thor. After a second of the not moving, he almost dismissed it, but as he watched the red dot it began to descend the office building that had been holding it. Tony discarded his phone to the sofa and watched with bated breath as it reached the ground floor, emerged onto the blue lit street, paused, and then began moving through the city.  

Tony barely registered where it was going, he was just overwhelmed that Loki was on the move. Or at least his phone was, there was no way of telling who was holding it but it was certainly better than it continuing to not move. 

He watched the red dot navigate the city, likely in a taxi judging by the speed at which it was moving, before it eventually stopped at Loki’s old apartment building. Not that told him anything, Thanos would know where Loki had lived, who’s to say they weren’t just going to ransack it and then head out again. The dot headed into that building up to where Tony remembered the apartment was, milled around for a minute or two before reemerging, heading back through the city. It took a moment before it dawned on Tony that the phone was on his way back here. It had to be Loki. 

The nausea didn’t dissipate, it just twisted into cautious excitement. Could Loki be alright? If he was, they may have just made it through the hardest part of this. The only thing left was to go back and get the Dot before it was found but they could think about that later. Compared to everything they’d gone through so far? Piece of cake.  

Tony couldn’t help the grin on his face and he took a shaky breath as the red dot stopped outside Stark Tower, hesitated a moment and then moved through the building. Only a split second ahead of the movement of the dot, Tony heard the elevator whir into life behind him and he stood from the sofa, watching, readying himself for whatever state Loki may be in.  

Tony had never known his lift to take as long as it did in this moment but eventually it hit his floor with a quiet ding and the doors slid open.  

Loki was stood upright within the elevator as the doors opened, which was already better than Tony’s worst nightmares. Not that he looked well. He held one arm across his waist, though whether that was because of pain in this arm or his stomach, Tony couldn’t tell. A shade of bruises lined one side of his face, down his neck and disappeared under his shirt where Tony suspected it got worse. But he was alive, and standing and as he stepped out of the lift, Loki gave a soft reassuring smile that creased his eyes. 

“Hi Tony.” 

Tony stared at him mouth half open for a second before he recovered himself and hurried across the distance between them, “’Hi Tony’? That’s it? That’s all I get?”  

Loki started to laugh but cut himself off with a sharp, pained, inhale, “You’re always so worried. I’m flattered.” 

Tony held his hands out to try to help Loki somehow, but realized that he wasn’t sure there was anywhere he could lay weight that wouldn’t hurt, “You ok?” 

“I’ve been better,” Loki conceded with a wince, “Could you help me sit down? My legs are not in their best shape.” 

Tony nodded eagerly and slipped an arm under Loki’s shoulders, noticing for the first time Loki was holding a half-empty bottle of whiskey in the hand that was not pressed to his stomach, “We celebrating?” 

Loki chuckled as Tony helped him limp to the sofa, “If there was any time to pause and take stock, now seemed better than any don’t you agree? This is a vintage bottle I’ve owned for a while now, only ever drinking it to mark the small victories. They were few and far between, but it felt appropriate.” 

“That why you went back to your apartment before coming back here?” Tony asked.  

At that, Loki narrowed his eyes then noticed the wire frame New York City laid out on the floor by the sofa, “Ah, why am I not surprised?” 

Tony moved himself away from Loki as he lowered himself onto the sofa, “Well, I had to make sure you weren’t just getting cold feet and skipping town,” he commented lightly, pausing to make sure Loki wasn’t going to collapse before turning away to head to where he kept his whiskey glasses.  

“I’m actually surprised you lasted this long,” Loki said from the sofa, “Thank you for trusting me.” 

Tony plucked a couple of glasses from the side and returned, “Didn’t leave me much choice, just leaving like that. I hope when this is all over we can set up some sort of mutual sharing of ideas type relationship structure,” Tony placed the glasses on the table in front of the sofa and held out his hand for the whiskey.  

Loki nodded, still smiling a little as he handed him the whiskey bottle, “I suppose I will have to work on that.” 

“How’d it go anyway?” Tony asked, unscrewing the lid and taking an inhale of the scent. It smelled pretty damn good, though he couldn’t be too sure that he wasn’t just riding the high of having Loki back, alive, conscious, and chatty, “You want to talk about it?” 

Loki swallowed and nodded again, though more uncertainly this time, “It went exactly how I thought it would go. Thanos wasn’t happy that I hadn’t been able to facilitate his theft from Wakanda and did what he could to show me that.” 

Tony poured out a couple of large measures. Loki looked like he could use it, and Tony certainly wouldn’t say no. The end of a 36 hour vigil was starting to take its toll and he could feel the tightness behind his eyes. 

“The Dot is in place,” Loki continued, “There is a small nook under Thanos’s computer monitor that you can only see if you are sat opposite the man. Given that there aren’t many people who would dare sit in his presence, it should be safe for another day or two, but I can’t guarantee that.” Loki’s expression took on a little bit of a thousand yard stare as he watched Tony pour. As hard as Tony’s night had been, it couldn’t possibly have matched up to what Loki had gone through.  

This would be the last time Tony allowed this to happen, he told himself. There was a moment of calm silence as Tony set the bottle to one side and handed Loki one of the glasses, then took one for himself and seated himself next to him, “Are they gonna relocate you or whatever it was you said?”  

Loki hesitated at the question, wrapping both hands around his glass before taking a breath, “Not yet. I convinced him I was too close to the goal to bother,” his voice drifted away as he watched the whiskey swirl as he moved the glass absently. 

Tony frowned. Something felt off. He reached out and laid a hand gently on Loki’s thigh, “Hey, it’s ok. I’m not letting you go back there again.” 

Loki didn’t move for a second, then rested his own hand over Tony’s and smiled up at him, only the barest hint of emotion in his eyes, “I know.” Then he lifted his glass, “To small victories.” 

Tony grinned and chinked his glass against Loki’s before throwing back the full shot. It burned just the right amount to prove it was in fact very expensive whiskey, though there was a subtle aftertaste that he couldn’t quite place. Despite that, it was good. Very good. He coughed a little as his stomach reminded him he hadn’t actually eaten anything for almost 48 hours, but that didn’t stop him from reaching out for the bottle ready to top up.  

 It was only when he looked back to Loki that he realized something was wrong. The man had gone back to staring into his glass, which was almost entirely covered as he clasped both hands around it. 

“Everything alright?” Tony asked, hesitating with the bottle in one hand.  

“It will be,” Loki said, so quietly, Tony wasn’t sure he wasn’t actually talking to himself, “But there’s something I have to do that you’re not going to like.” 

Tony narrowed his eyes for a second but a fatigue came over him with a suddenness that made him shake his head to clear it before looking back to Loki, “What is it?” 

Loki swallowed, but didn’t lift his gaze, “Tony...I’m so sorry.” 

“What are you talking about?” Tony asked, blinking hard to fight through the tiredness that was trying to sweep over him, he suppressed a yawn, “Sorry for what?” 

Loki didn’t answer, simply placed his glass on the table. The whiskey that was still in it rippled as Loki let it go.  

Tony glanced between the glass and the half-empty bottle, his drowsy mind scrabbling to put the pieces together but simultaneously doing everything to reject the implication of the result. He screwed his eyes shut and shook his head again, but the confusion just wouldn’t shift, “Have you given me something?” 

“It’ll help you sleep,” Loki said, that stone cold neutrality in his voice Tony had only heard when the guy was on the phone with Thanos, “I’ve used it myself a few times. It only lasts a few hours, though assuming that you’ve been up all night, you might well be out for longer. It might actually be good for you.”  

Tony forced himself to his feet through the haze in his head, fuelled by a muted outrage that made him want to do something, anything. The only goal his mind gave him was to sleep, “What the hell, Loki?” he tried to force anger into his voice, but his brain just wasn’t getting the message over the incessant call to just close his eyes, “We had a plan.” 

He watched through lidded eyes as Loki rose to his feet, moving a lot easier than he had just a few moments ago, “Not everyone has the capacity for change that you do.” 

Tony swayed again, overcompensated and slipped forward, only to feel a warm grip catch him before he went too far. The vague proposition of fighting crossed his mind for a second but the thought slipped away, “You lied to me...” his eyes finally acquiesced to the drugs in his system and the lids slipped closed. 

“I’ve lied to a lot of people,” he heard Loki say softly near his ear, “Don’t take it personally.” In his final moments of consciousness, he felt himself be lowered gently to the sofa, “It’s just business.” 

And then comforting darkness welcomed him. 

*** 

The sun was just rising into the sky when Tony awoke, disoriented. He’d been out cold overnight. It only took a second before the last set of memories hammered their way into his conscious and he snapped upright on the sofa, eyes darting around the penthouse.  

He was alone in silence. The only evidence that the day before had not been some horrendous nightmare was the half bottle of whiskey and two glasses set out on the coffee table, one still full. Loki was nowhere to be seen.  

“Jarvis,” Tony said, feeling frozen, “Jarvis, where is he?” 

A part of him prayed that there was some other explanation for this. That if he just calmed down, perhaps he would be able to hear the sound of the shower from the other room. Or smell breakfast being prepared in the other room.  

“Mr Laufeyson departed last night sir,” Jarvis said, his engineered calmness doing nothing to help Tony’s mood, “I’m sorry sir, there was nothing I could do.” 

“What are you talking about?” the thud of his heartbeat in his ears was growing louder by the second.  

In answer, a holographic screen appeared in Tony’s eyeline showing a viewpoint of his penthouse from one of his CCTV cameras. In slightly fuzzy imagery, he watched his past self scrabble to his feet looking almost drunk, and Loki stand along with him. There was no sound but, Tony could see himself say something, and then fall forward. Loki moved quickly to catch him, though there was an obvious grimace on the man’s face as he did so. Tony didn’t need to hear to remember what was said as Loki then laid the limp Tony on the sofa. Loki stood over his sleeping form for a moment, then lifted his gaze to the workshop door.  

The viewpoint on the screen changed abruptly to show the entirety of the workshop. After a second of perfect stillness, Loki’s feet could be seen slowly descending the stairs. Though he was not moving quickly, there was a clear limp as he made his way down. Pieces dropped into place, as Tony watched in horror as Loki cautiously approached the door. There was slight pause as Jarvis processed the alterations to protocol that Tony had set, and the door slid to one side. Again, there was no sound, but he could see a grim smile on Loki’s face the man stepped through, picking his way across the cable strewn floor, ducked under the particle accelerator to the table top with the Hearts.  

Tony felt sick as he watched Loki stop in front of the table. The guy seemed to hesitate as he stood over it, then cast he gaze around the room almost forlornly. Tony begged the image to stop, turn around and walk away, but he knew that Jarvis would not be showing him this footage if that had happened. After a second of deliberation, Loki picked up one of the older Heart models and turned it over in his hands. Tony thought he could see Loki say something to himself, but he could not tell what it was. And then Loki turned and headed for the door, the Heart clutched in one hand.  

The footage angle switched back to the penthouse where Tony was out cold on the sofa. Loki slowed as he passed him, some undisclosed thought passing over his bruised features but he didn’t stop. He headed for the elevator and disappeared from view as the doors slid closed. With that the image on the screen froze.  

“Find him,” Tony growled, as he forced himself to his feet and headed to the workshop door. 

“I’ve tried sir, however the GPS of his phone is inactive,” Jarvis’s voice followed him as Tony ran down the stairs, taking them two at a time, and pushing through the door at their base before it had a chance to open fully. 

Once Tony was inside the workshop, he slowed, taking a moment to try to control his breathing, his heartbeat, his thoughts. He approached the table carefully, hoping beyond hope that he was wrong. That there was some other explanation. Maybe this was just to teach Tony a lesson about trusting people too easily and Loki would jump out from somewhere in a second, brandishing the Heart. Tony would lay into him, Loki would apologize and quickly find a way to show Tony how much he meant it. They would go back upstairs to laugh about how much of a lightweight Tony was to pass out after one shot of whiskey as they started to plan their future together. 

But that was not the reality.  

Tony stood over the worktop on which had once sat all versions of the Heart. Except now there was one less and Loki was gone. Hell, Tony may as well have just handed it over to him he realized are he backtracked though the months leading up to this. Though, that had been Loki’s plan all along.  

Tony’s fists clenched and unclenched where he stood.  

Every moment since they met had been a fake. The bickering, the sex, the confession, the reconciliation, the plans for the future. Every single one had been a bare-faced lie designed to hit Tony at every single pressure point he had. Loki had flowed into his life, read him like a book and exploded away again, taking Tony’s pride and joy with him. Exactly as he always had to countless others in his career. And just like every other victim, Tony had been desperate and gullible enough to believe it wouldn’t happen to him.  

He rubbed his eyes with his thumb and forefinger so hard it hurt, sending flashes of white light across his vision when he eventually let his hand drop back to his side.  

“Loki, I told you I’d be coming after you… 

 _I should hope so too._  

The little shit had said it like it would be a game. 

Tony clenched his jaw and turned away from the table, “Jarvis, find the address of the place Loki’s GPS was the other night and have Clint and Nat meet me there.” 

“Of course, sir. May I ask why?” 

Tony made his way out of the workshop, striding up the stairs, “I need to work out what the hell happened and I need a neutral party.”  

“Forgive me, sir, but what happened is clear. You saw the footage.” 

“I know what I saw!” Tony snapped angrily as he stepped back out into penthouse then closed his eyes and exhaled to calm himself, “Just...please could you ask Happy to bring a car around while I make myself look presentable?” 

“Very good sir.” 


	26. Chapter 26

The lift was a small metal box, no mirrors or music, just a dull white glow emanating from behind the blurring panels in the ceiling, barely big enough for the two of them as Tony and Happy were carried up to the only floor this lift gave them the option for. They’d strode into the lobby of the building earlier, with absolutely no intention of being stopped and it must have shown because the security guard buzzed them through without asking. Tony was vaguely aware of her muttering something into her phone as they headed for the elevator bank.  

Tony wasn’t sure what he was expecting to find at the other end of this lift. It could have been Loki, it could be Thanos, it could be both or it could be neither. So, planning what exactly he was going to do once he was in there was somewhat difficult, but Tony had always prided himself on his ability for improvisation. Happy was here as a witness more than anything, and he had Clint and Nat on standby watching the building’s entrances and exits. No matter what he found at the other end of this lift, his presence here might just shake someone of importance loose, and Tony wanted to be able to track them down once they were out in the open.  

After a few minutes spent uncomfortably close to Happy, the lift slowed to a stop with an unusually ear-piercing ding and the doors slid open. It seemed everything about this lift was designed to put people on edge, not that Tony needed any help with that.  

The room beyond appeared to be designed with the same theme in mind. It was relatively small, clearly nothing more than a reception area for whatever was beyond the overbearing black wood doors at the opposite side of the room. It was a second before Tony noticed the desk set off to the right. He hesitated a second then strode out of the lift.  

An old hunched man hurried around from behind the desk and put himself in Tony’s path, halting him in the middle of the room.  

“May I help you?” he asked in a cracked voice and it was only after a second that that Tony recognized him as the same man that had been his intermediary with Thanos once upon a time. That answered one question. Loki had been honest about him working for Thanos. The next step was to find out Thanos had done with him and his Heart.  

Tony flashed him an over exaggerated grin, “Long time no see, I’m surprised to see you’re...” he paused to find the right words, “still alive. If you’ll excuse me, I need to see your boss. I assume he’s through here?” it was a rhetorical question and Tony simply stepped around the small man, keen not to actually touch him in the process.  

“I’m afraid, Thanos does not take visitors without an appointment,” the man protested attempting to step after him, but Happy laid a hand on his shoulder and Tony continued to the door.  

“Happy will you make an appointment with Thanos’s secretary.” 

“Sure boss, what kind of time were you thinking?” 

“How about five minutes ago?” Tony said over his shoulder then checked his watch, “Uh oh, I’m late for an appointment, I must go.” With that, he turned the door handle and swung it open.  

Inside was an office not dissimilar to any one of those of at Stark Tower, before anyone moved into one. A big room with plenty of window to allow natural light to spill in,illuminating a décor that went beyond just minimalistic. There were only the bare essentials, a bookshelf that was entirely full, a wooden cabinet with a series of lockable drawers, even the desk and chairs facing it looked as though it could have been bought from a Swedish build it yourself store. But Tony spared the room only the briefest of glances, gaze fixed on the man behind the desk.  

Thanos had not changed since the last they met. A huge, bald man, taller than Thor and somehow broader, he looked so stuffed into his skin it almost had a purple tinge. He was bent over a set of papers in front of his keyboard and monitor and slowly lifted his head as Tony stood in the doorway, scrabbling to push away that tightness in his chest. This was not the time. He’d faced worse than this.  

A confused frown twitched at the man’s brow for a moment before he set aside the pen he was using, “Tony Stark,” he said in deep greeting, “I must say this is a surprise. How long has it been?” 

“Two years, eight months, and ten days,” Tony replied instantly with a fact he wished he could one day lose track of, “But who’s counting. Sorry to drop by unannounced you got five minutes?” 

“I’m actually very bus-” 

Tony ignored him, coming into the office and taking a seat in one of the two chairs in front of the desk. As he did, he flashed back to the night before.  _There’s a nook behind his computer monitor...it should be safe there_. Until now, Tony had dismissed Loki's description, first as something he would never need to know since he’d assumed Loki would be the man to retrieve it, and then later, as merely another lie to continue the ruse just a little longer. But it couldn’t hurt to check... 

Tony made show of shuffling in the uncomfortable seat and then glancing around the room, “Nice office you got here,” he passed his gaze over the computer monitor as casually as possible, and had to force himself not to react as a glint of silver caught his attention, exactly where Loki had said it would be. Had Loki told him where it was so Tony could be the one to find it? Tony sniffed to cover his reaction and continued to glance around, as if he had not clocked all four of the features of the room in the first second of his entry, “Don’t think I’ve ever been here.” 

Thanos was watching him with an intensity that Tony remembered all too well, “No, you wouldn’t have. It is a recent acquisition.” 

Tony hmm’ed indistinctly as he was still battling to figure out what Loki had been thinking. If the Dot was in position then why did Loki still do what he did? The plan was still good. After a second, he decided he didn’t have to know that now, he just had to get the Dot back, there would be something on there that would help him, “That lift could do with a little decoration, it’s like coming up in a freezer box.” 

“I’ll look into it,” Thanos replied, very obviously planning on doing nothing of the sort, “Is there anything I can do for you Stark, or did you just come here to insult my offices?” 

“Not  _just_ to insult your offices, no, I’m actually looking for someone and I was hoping that you could help me,” Tony scooted his chair forward so that he could lean on the desk, closer to where the Dot was sitting.  

“Help you look for someone?” Thanos had narrowed his eyes but Tony couldn’t read why, “I assume that the globe’s leading technology developer would need no help with such a thing.” 

“You should know better, I don’t do that anymore,” Tony gave a flickering smile, “There’s a guy who’s been helping me out on free-lance basis, but he’s upped and disappeared,” Tony shrugged as though it was just a minor inconvenience, then watched Thanos carefully as he said, “The name’s Loki Laufeyson, tall guy, long black hair, green eyes. Kinda hipster goth vampire vibe about him.” 

To Thanos’s credit, the man barely batted an eyelid at the name and had Tony not spent the last few months with the city’s best liar, he may have missed the microexpression that passed over his face, “I’m afraid the name means nothing to me.” 

Tony heaved a sigh and shifted in his seat, slumping back a little, but leaving one hand resting behind Thanos’s monitor, inches from the Dot, “Funny, cos I got hold of Loki’s last employer, a guy I’m actually working quite closely with for a side project and he told me the last he heard was Loki was involved in the Titan conglomerate. I just assumed you might know what your employees were up to.” 

Thanos studied Tony with an unreadable expression, “May I ask why you are so keen to find him?” 

“I wanted to keep this on the downlow but if it’ll help...” Tony pretended to think for a second then took a deep breath and broke eye contact, then moved in his chair again, managing to get his fingers to brush the Dot. Tony leant in as though he was about to share a secret, “He has something of mine that I’d quite like returned,” Tony turned his expression serious, hoping to distract Thanos enough while his fingers slowly worked the Dot out from its hiding place, “You see, I wanted to give him, and whoever he might be working with, the opportunity to return my property before this whole messy situation could be made messier when the authorities got involved.” 

Thanos was quiet for a long moment but Tony held his gaze despite every muscle screaming to look away. He wasn’t backing down from this, “I’m sorry to hear that Stark. I’m afraid I don’t know this man you seek but if you are right in that he works for the Titan conglomerate, I will look into this for you, but appreciate that this may take time. In the meanwhile, should you come across this man or any information on his whereabouts before I do,” he paused to emphasize his point, “Please do let me know. I cannot have my employees besmirching my name in this way.  

Thanos didn’t know where Loki was either.  

The realization came over Tony in one sudden, almost overwhelming crash and he had to pause for a second to recover his composure. “Well I guess that’s the best I can hope for,” he stood quickly and rebuttoned his suit jacket, “Give me a call if you ever get your soul back, maybe we could work together again.” 

Thanos gave a thin smile, “Goodbye Stark.” 

Tony returned the smile and left the office.  

Happy was stood over the desk in the reception room, his full mass looming effectively over the decrepit man. Seeing Tony emerge, he gave the man one final threatening look and fell in silently behind Tony as he stepped into the lift. The journey down and back out of the building was silent. Tony knowing better than to speak anything while he was still within the building, even if he could get his thoughts straight enough to form a sentence. What the hell was Loki doing? 

It wasn’t until they were back in the car and driving away from the building did Tony dare take a look at the Dot. Happy would be able to hear what was going on, but it didn’t matter at this point. 

Tony pinched the Dot between his thumb and forefinger, “Did it work Jarvis?” 

A light on his watched flicked into life and in response a blue circle began to glow around the edge of the Dot as Jarvis linked with it, “There is a partially complete computer mimic present on the hard drive. Further analysis will need to be undertaken in the workshop.” 

Hope blossomed in Tony’s mind, “Nothing obvious about Loki then? Where he might be?” 

“Not that I can see through this ancillary system,” Jarvis replied, “Though there is audio that matches Mr Laufeyson’s vocal signature from two days ago.” 

Tony took a deep breath and readied himself, “Play it.” 

The backseat of the car was suddenly filled with a soft rustling sound akin to a pocket-dialed phone, but after a second, Tony heard a muffled conversation start.  

‘ _I was sorry to hear the Wakanda operation failed_.’ 

Tony couldn’t help but clench his jaw at the sound of Loki’s voice, but it was hard to tell why. There was another second of rustling before the background noise suddenly cleared. Loki must have taken the Dot out of his pocket. 

‘ _Failure is rare within my organization and so when it occurs, I tend to take it a little personally.’_ Even if it wasn’t muffled there was no disguising Thanos’s voice.  

There was a soft click and suddenly the audio evened out. Loki must have put the Dot in place, ‘ _Then perhaps you should start with your operative in Wakanda.’_  

 _‘I did. He had some interesting information regarding the external consultant Stark provided. Apparently, whoever it was had intimate knowledge of our operating methods and an exceptionally...distinctive accent.’_  

 _‘...I can explain.’_  

 _‘I’ve been in b_ _us_ _iness a long time, Loki. Those with a reasonable explanation rarely have to preface it with such a phrase.’_  

 _‘Given the presence of my brother, about which I was not forewarned, I had to use my real name. From there it was not hard for Stark to trace my history or lack thereof, and it wasn’t long before he worked out that I was not there for benign reasons.’_  

 _‘So_ _,_ _you were compromised and you failed to inform me.’_  

 _‘I didn’t see any need to as, unlike your Wakanda operative, I salvaged the situation. I convinced Stark that I_ _was_ _merely a self-employed thief and being with him had made me see the light. That with his help I could start to make amends for what I have done.’_  

 _‘A dangerous gamble.’_  

 _‘A lucrative one. He trusts me now more than ever, demonstrated by my involvement in the Wakanda situation.’_  

 _‘Then why did you fail_ _me_ _there?’_  

 _‘I could not see any gain in its success for me. I will not apologize for self-preservation, as I’m sure you wouldn’t either.’_  

 _‘And what has this gain bought me but unnecessary effort in media control while you enjoy fine dinners and VIP galas?’_  

 _‘I am days away from_ _your_ _goal. Despite the distraction, I know what it is Stark is working on, and where it is.’_  

There was a pause in the conversation and in the silence the weight of what was happening was beginning to dawn on Tony.  

‘ _I’m afraid I have a problem_ _,_ _Loki, in that I’m starting to feel like I’m being spoken to as though I am one of your projects...Would you like to know what I think happened?’_  

 _‘I assume that is a rhetorical question?’_  

 _‘I think you were discovered, but rather than return to me empty handed to face the ramifications of failure, you did what you do best. You grabbed the next offer that was handed to you. Stark offered you a way out of your failure, as I did all those years ago, and like a coward you took it. Once again proving_ _just how little_ _it takes to buy your meagre loyalty. You have no intention of delivering anything from Stark and you deliberately sabotaged my operation in Wakanda in the hope that he could shelter you from this fallout. Am I close?_  

 _‘...That is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard,_ _Thanos_ _.’_ To Loki’s credit, the man sounded genuinely surprised as Thanos had laid bare everything they had planned as though it was stupidest plan in the world. 

 _‘Is it? Then you will have no objections when I tell you that I am removing you from the Stark project.’_  

 _‘None at all, save to point out that you would be wasting the months of time and resource I have put into this. If I am not the one to succeed here, then no one will. You think he will remain open to these tactics again?’_  

 _‘He won’t have to. Do you think that you are my only course of action I have to get what I want? I would usually loathe to use them but I fear you have left me no choice.’_  

 _‘What are you talking about?’_  

 _‘Well, where you are subtle, but time-consuming, I have people who are fast-acting, but can be a little, how should I put this...blunt. I don’t know how much Stark has shared with you about his past, but he and I worked together once before. I started to get the impression he was getting cold feet about what we were planning, and so it was my men who reminded him just how dangerous the world is.’_  

There was a sickening beat of silence before the penny dropped and Loki’s voice lost a measure of its composure, ‘ _You orchestrated Afghanistan?’_  

 _‘I did what I had to_ _,_ _to secure his allegiance.’_  

Tony clenched his fist in a bid to control himself as the revelation threw itself at the delicate walls he’d put up around his mind. It couldn’t be true. It had been an accident. Wrong place wrong time, that’s all. Wasn’t it?  

“You alright Boss?” 

He was vaguely aware of Happy’s concerned frown in the rearview mirror but didn’t make eye contact. His chest was tightening. At least until Loki almost amused voice drifted through the car speakers, ‘ _And it worked so well you’re willing to try again?’_  

It was the familiar quiet confidence that slipped into his mind and began to loosen the hold of the anxiety enough for him to compartmentalize it. This was not the time for dealing with that.  

 _‘I would say that your fear for my goals is appreciated_ _, Loki,_ _were I not worried that is misplaced. Stark is no longer your concern, put him from your mind and instead begin to think about how you can earn my forgiveness.’_  

 _‘Sir, forgive me but this is madness. Allow me to finish my work, you will have what you want within days without risking an inquiry into the kidnap of Tony Stark leading back to you,’_ Loki’s voice had grown more insistent. 

Thanos gave a dark chuckle, ‘ _I am no fool, Loki. The only thing you would do on your return to the man is warn him, if only to_ _worm_ _your way into his good graces just that little bit more like the two-faced snake you are. You think you have found someone who cares about you, who will shelter you if you so wished. As if it was not I who saved you once already. You seem to forget that I could still throw you back where I found you and not even Stark could save you there.’_  

‘ _Then why don’t you?’_ Loki spat defiantly, and Tony would have been proud at the man’s fire, were it not so wildly mistimed, ‘ _Your vague threats mean little to me_ _anymore,_ _Thanos_ _. If you meant them, I would not still be sat here. Perhaps you know that Stark is probably the one person that could save me. He can’t be broken by you. You’ve tried once before with all the weapons of the Afghan war and what did he do? He rejected you completely and saved more lives than could ever have been hur_ _t by what you had planned_ _,’_ Loki gave a chuckle and Tony couldn’t help but be angry with himself that he had ever done anything but trust this man who was spitting in  Thanos’s  face in Tony’s defense,  _‘It must burn you, to have come so close.’_  

There was a violent crash that made Tony flinch and when Thanos spoke again, his voice had moved position, ‘ _It would seem that you need to be reminded of who it is that you work for,’_  Tony winced as he heard a choked noise somewhere near where  Thano  was talking. He didn’t  have  to think too hard to work out what it was, ‘ _You will be relocated with no contact with Stark save for the regular updates my men will send you as they slowly but surely twist everything I want from him. You will watch him break and you will know that it was your betrayal that caused it.’_  

 _‘What could you possibly do now that you couldn’t in a terrorist cell in a desert?’_  Loki was talking in choked gasps, Thanos must have had a hand around his throat and for the first time ever, Tony begged the guy to just shut up.  

There was a wordless yell from Thanos and another crash. A worrying silence reigned for just too long before Thanos spoke again, ‘ _I expected cowardice Loki, but the compassion I did not. You actually care for_ _Stark_ _don’t you?’_  

There was no response from Loki.  

‘ _Very well, I will allow you to see him one final time.’_  

 _‘Why?’_ Loki’s voice was laced with suspicion, but was no longer choked, though it did sound as though it was coming from the floor.  

‘ _It would be stupid of the two of you not to have arranged some plan if you were to suddenly go missing. I won’t have him hounding me once you are gone. So_ _,_ _I want you to return to him and give him a plausible reason for your disappearance, one that he will not question and will not want to follow you because of.’_  

 _‘And what is to stop me from just warning him of what you’re planning?’_  

 _‘Always know the right question to ask, that was one of the things I liked about you Loki. If I suspect you have warned him about any of what we have discussed here today, or if he comes after you, well_ _,_ _let me just reiterate that hostage situations are tricky. He only barely escaped the last one with his life, we wouldn’t want his luck to run out.’_  

 _‘Even you are not stupid enough to kill him...If you think that I will stay silent if you dare-’_  

 _‘Who would believe you?! The stranger who appeared out of nowhere and disappeared just as fast only a couple of weeks before the tragedy. You have found the courage to face up to your crimes, but would it extend to being accused of the murder of Tony Stark?’_  

Loki was silent. 

‘ _Do we have an understanding?’_  

 _‘We do.’_  

 _‘I’m glad. You will have six hours, one for each year that you have been loyal to me and then I will expect you back here._ _Oh_ _and don_ _’t_ _try to run, it would be all to_ _o_ _easy to track you down. Take him away.’_  

Tony could hear the sound of a door bursting open as Loki suddenly protested, ‘ _Wait! Wait you said I had six hours!’_  

 _‘And you will, when I am satisfied that you understand what my men can do,’_ Tony could hear the scuffling in the background, ‘ _Farewell Loki, I’ll see you again soon.’_  

Tony heard the door slam shut and there was silence again.  

“There is no further audio until your arrival this morning, sir,” Jarvis said quietly, but Tony barely registered it.  

His mind was reeling as he tried to piece together what the hell Loki had been thinking. The implication of Thanos being involved in what happened in Afghanistan was screwed up and compartmentalized, he did not have the capacity to unpack that now and it made no difference in his immediate reality. Loki had been confronted with a threat to Tony’s life and in response he’d drugged him and stolen his work, but Tony was struggling to understand the steps in between. What had Loki known that Tony didn’t?  

“Sorry to interrupt, Boss,” Happy said from the front seat, “But is that a credible threat to your life that we should be aware of?” 

“It might have been yesterday,” Tony muttered, not really concentrating on his response, “I doubt Thanos would risk coming after me after I’ve been to see him. Especially now that...” the sentence drifted into silence as two trains of thought collided in his mind with a nauseous realization, “Now that Loki has what he wants...Oh that stupid bastard.” 

“What? What do you mean, Boss?” 

“Loki took the Heart because he knew that Thanos wouldn’t bother risking attacking me if he could give him an easier target,” Tony was talking hurriedly, still piecing together the thoughts as they came to him, “Thanos said it himself, it wouldn’t be hard to track him down.” 

Happy frowned into the rearview mirror, “Seems unlikely, how would Thanos have known he had it unless you told him?” 

Tony’s mouth dropped open, “Loki knew I wouldn’t trust him not to have betrayed me...”  

He slumped back against the car seat and tried to sort through his thoughts, pulling out the facts that mattered.  

Loki was still on his side, that mattered. Loki was on the run, that mattered. Loki was in danger, that mattered most.  

“Clint Barton is calling sir,” Jarvis said.  

“Put him through,” there was a pause before Tony recognized the click that meant the lines had been connected, “What’s up Barton?” 

“Well, whatever you did in there stirred something up, we followed a bunch of suits to an apartment downtown. They didn’t bring anything out, so we went to check it ourselves, but the apartment’s been ransacked,” Clint explained.  

Tony exhaled, “No sign of anyone at all?” 

“Other than bare furniture the place is empty, no clothes, no papers, no photos, would’ve assumed it had been unoccupied if we hadn’t seen them coming here.” 

“Sounds about right...” Tony said quietly. Clearly, while also drugging a bottle of whiskey, Loki had made sure to clear anything important from his apartment before heading to Stark Tower. 

“You gonna tell us who we’re looking for?” Clint asked, “Might make this a little easier.” 

Tony exhaled, “It’s Loki.” 

“Your boyfriend, Loki?” 

“Not sure what he is at the moment,” Tony mumbled as a passing thought, “But he’s danger. I need you guys to track him down.” 

“Well, if this is where the guy was living it might be pretty difficult, looks like he doesn’t exactly live an ‘on the grid’ lifestyle.” 

“I’ve got some of his stuff in the penthouse, come see me when you’re back and take whatever you need. This is a priority one, Barton, use any means necessary. We gotta find him before those suits do.” 

“On it. We’ll meet you back at the Tower.” 

With that, Tony hung up and stared out the window as the city passed by, eyes glancing from face to face, hoping beyond hope that he’d catch those confident green eyes or that smug grin. But there was nothing.  

“Where the hell are you, Loki?"  


	27. Chapter 27

The days following Loki’s disappearance were some of the worst that Tony could remember. Naturally, there were some that could never be beaten, but most of those had been blurred by his brain’s own defence mechanisms or by direct action involving a variety of intoxicating substances. These more recent times, however, had none of the immediate threat to his life that would trigger any form of memory repression, and intoxicating substances were out of the question until Loki had been found. Though by the third day he was starting to consider looking into whether it was actually possible to overdose on caffeine. It was probably something he would need to be aware of if this went on much longer.  

Since his chat with Thanos, there had been no word on Loki’s whereabouts. Clint and Natasha had put every one of their resources to work on the issue, starting with the few backwater towns that Loki had picked out as possible boltholes in Plan A. But they were a dead end. They couldn’t track the guy’s car either. Apparently, one of Thanos’s guys had found it traded into a dodgy car lot on the outskirts of the city, the kind that didn’t ask too many questions. The owner had traded the flash sports car for a sum of cash that was vastly below its value, but the ‘beat up guy with the black hair’ hadn’t quibbled and disappeared in a hurry with only a backpack. Tony had kept Jarvis on the active search for the GPS on Loki’s phone but he was not holding out much hope.  

In fact, the whole search was becoming bleaker by the hour. Turns out a guy with no other known contacts in the country, no form of hackable technology on him, and operating on a cash-only basis was closer to U.S. Marshall territory than Tony would have liked. The one thing that was keeping him optimistic was that it seemed that Thanos was having just as much difficult a time tracking him down as Tony was.  

When dawn broke on day four, Tony was stood in the centre of his Penthouse, staring up at a bank of holographic images, each one showing a different CCTV image of the car lot that Loki’s car had been found at, two interior and four exterior.  

“Again,” he muttered.  

There was a second of silence and Tony could tell that Jarvis was about to say something futile but thankfully realized that now was not the time and abruptly the screens’ images changed. Now, Loki was there, talking with the car lot owner. That same deep sadness resonated through his mind, as it had every other time he’d watched these images since Jarvis had found them the day before. Loki looked haggard and pained, the bruising lining one side of his face obvious even on the poor resolution image. Tony watched the silent discussion, once again cursing the lack of sound. Not that it would help him find the guy, he just wanted to hear his voice again. He’d realized not long into day three that it was probably the longest he’d gone without hearing that wonderful, clipped accent since the two had met and, god, how he missed it.  

He watched impassively as look of restrained anger passed over Loki’s face and he cut through the air with one had in a motion of finality. The car lot owner nodded gleefully in response and disappeared into a different room, and his image reappeared on an adjacent screen, but Tony was not interested. He'd reviewed that footage enough to know it was of no interest and no use. Instead, he kept his eyes fixed on Loki, waiting for that one moment he craved.  

Loki took a deep breath, readjusted the weight of the backpack he had slung over one shoulder then reached into the inner pocket of the jacket he was wearing. From it, he pulled what looked like a small photograph and held it one hand. He regarded it for second and then abruptly lifted his head and his eyes locked onto the camera that Tony was watching him through. The look softened suddenly and his lips moved.  

There it was. Whether he was actually saying something aloud or simply mouthing, Tony suspected he would never know. Either way, the words ‘I’m so sorry’ moved over his lips, his green gaze piercing through the camera, out of the footage and straight into Tony, carrying the message like a sniper shot in such a way he didn’t even consider it wasn’t meant for him. 

Tony swallowed and clenched his jaw. The moment passed and he wasn’t sure whether he was grateful or he wanted it to last forever, because right now, anything was better than the nothing he had.  

The car lot owner returned and Loki hastily slipped the photo back into his jacket. A wad of cash was handed over and Loki gave a single, curt nod before walking from the building, limping a little as he went. The CCTV images followed him down the street a little way, flicking from image to image, Loki giving each camera cursory glance to make it astutely obvious he was aware of each one. The images followed until Loki abruptly disappeared from one screen and did not appear again.  

And that was the last image that Jarvis had been able to find.  

“Again.” 

This time Jarvis did not acquiesce, ”Sir, there is nothing new in these images. Perhaps if you were to get some sleep, you may see something you have missed already.” 

“If I’ve told you once, I’ve told you a thousand times, sleeping won’t help him, so why would I bother? Play it again, and bring up the map of his movements.” 

“We have already searched the area, there was no further footage from within a mile radius of his last known point.” 

“So expand the radius!” Tony snapped, then rubbed his eyes as regret caught up quickly with the irritation, “I’m sorry, J. I just gotta find him.” 

“Of course sir,” Jarvis replied, a note of sympathy in his engineered voice as the wire frame map of New York City formed on the ground at his feet, under the bank of holographic screens.  

The images played again, and this time a small red blip followed the action on the screen, mimicking the movement through the screens and Tony felt that familiar disappointment when it did indeed make no difference. He sighed, rubbing his stomach in some vain bid to alleviate the perpetual nausea that had settled there a few days ago.  

He left the bank of screens to pour himself a coffee, blinking hard to push away some of that heaviness. Not that it ever worked.  

“Sir, Clint Barton calling for you,” Jarvis said, then without waiting for permission, patched the call through.  

Any surge of hope that came with calls from Clint or Nat had been slowly numbed by repeated exposure to nothing more than a buzz of apprehension, neither positive or negative.  

“Morning Barton,” Tony greeted as pleasantly as he could manage, then threw back the mouthful of burning espresso, winced and set about refilling the cup.  

“Tony, there’s a delivery for you.” 

Tony scowled, “I have better things to be doing, just sign for it and send it up.” 

“He’s saying that he can only deliver to you personally,” Clint said, “Says someone paid him a lot of money to bring something to you and he won’t get paid until he can get proof of delivery.” 

“Paid by who?” the buzz was gaining some traction.  

There was a moment of silence as Clint relayed the question, “He says the guy’s name was Vogel.” 

Tony almost dropped the cup he was holding, “Send him up.” 

“Sure,” with that Clint hung up.  

It took a force of will for Tony to suppress that buzz in his stomach. He had to tell himself that he didn’t know what this meant. It could mean that Loki was alive and well, or at least well enough to send him a post card from the exotic place he’d found himself in, or it meant that Thanos had caught up to him without Tony knowing and this going to be some horrific gloat.  

Tony had shut down all but one screen, which remained frozen on the image of Loki peering up at the car lot camera, and the wire frame map by the time the lift reached his penthouse. Clint and a boy in his late teens stepped out, the latter carrying a plain cardboard box no bigger than ten inches cubed.  

“What’s your name kid?” Tony asked, watching the boy with a measured gaze. The kid seemed entirely unfazed, with the air of a service worker who just wanted his shift to be over with already.  

“Not allowed to say,” the kid replied, approaching Tony casually, Clint not far behind, but carried the box with a caution that indicated there was something worth much more than his job inside it, “Delivery for Tony Stark.” 

“What is it?” Tony gave the box a cursory glance then flicked his gaze back to the boy. 

The kid shrugged, “He didn’t tell me. In fact, he said that if I opened the box or gave it to anyone but you, then I wouldn’t get the other half of my pay check. So guess you’ll have to find out yourself.” 

“He?” 

“Said his name was Vogel, no last name,” the kid said, oblivious the impact of what he was saying, then held the box out a little further indicating for Tony to take it. Which Tony did, cautiously, that familiar dislike of being handed something overwhelmingly silenced by the need to know. It wasn’t heavy but there was a weight to it that Tony recognized immediately. Once Tony had the box, the kid stuffed his hand in his pocket and pulled out an old flip phone, “He said you had to open it and I had to let him know when you did. Proof of delivery, see?” he shrugged again, not looking up as he typed something out into the phone, scowling occasionally, as the outdated technology failed to keep up with him.  

Tony blinked and immediately tore through the cardboard top of the box. Inside was stuffed as far as it could be with newspapers, foam beans, and cotton wool, but it fell away easily under Tony’s fingers. Beneath the stuffing sat the Heart, laying undamaged amongst the best that Loki could have done for packing as possible wherever he was. There wasn’t so much as a fingerprint on the alloy frame. 

Tony’s brow twitched into an uncertain frown just as he heard a sound like a digitized camera click and he looked up to see the kid lowering his old phone.  

The kid glanced up to see him staring and shrugged, again, “Proof of delivery.” 

“Give me the phone,” Tony demanded, handing off the box to Clint without looking at him and taking a step forward, “Give me the phone, kid.” 

The kid chuckled a little and took a step back, still typing something out, “He said you’d do that. Just hang on a sec and you can speak to him yourself.” 

Tony blinked and faltered. The three stood in silence broken only by the soft click of phone keys being pressed. Speak to him? Tony glanced between the phone and the kid, a wide-eyed scowl marring his features. What the hell did he mean, speak to him? He was ok?  

There was a quiet noise as a message was received and the kid held out the phone to Tony with a look of smugness that only a teenager could manage. A second later, an out-dated ringtone shattered the silence. 

The kid waited for a second but when Tony didn’t move, he offered it again, “He told me to tell you he’d only try once and he’d understand if you didn’t answer. Whatever that means.” 

Tony stared at it like it was the countdown to an explosion before his brain kicked into gear and he snatched it from the kid’s hand. The number was blocked, but that wouldn’t stop Jarvis from pinpointing the signal. With a shaky breath and a glance to Clint, Tony answered it. 

****** 

Loki stood in the booth, the handset resting against his ear as he watched the sunrise over the low concrete wall that enclosed the parking lot. Under normal circumstances, there was very little that could convince him to use a public telephone, but trying to speak to Tony Stark in a manner that would maximise the time needed to trace a call and then disappear without being tracked was not normal circumstance. A phonebooth from the late sixties at an intersection truck stop that was only visited by people looking to avoid people altogether was Loki’s best bet.  

The phone continued to ring and Loki exhaled, still trying to decide whether this was a good idea or not. He should've just put a note in the box like he’d originally planned, it wasn’t like Tony would want to speak to him anyway. The phone continued to ring and Loki clenched his fist around the handset. He should just go, this was a foolish, selfish idea. So what if he just wanted to hear Tony's voice one last time? Tony didn’t deserve to have this dragged up again and Loki didn’t deserve anything from Tony. It would be for the best if he just left it alone now. Tony had his work back, he was safe, and Loki was where he always deserved to be. It was done.  

He set his jaw and was just about to put the phone down when there was a click and the ringing stopped. A knot in Loki’s stomach clenched.  

“Tony Stark speaking,” There was a caution in Tony's words that was unfamiliar, but the sound of his voice washed through him and for the briefest of moments, Loki pretended like everything was ok again.  

Loki closed his eyes to enjoy the feeling, “Hi Tony.” 

“Where are you?”  

It was a demand rather than a question but it had none of the animosity that Loki had expected. Perhaps, he was not hated after all, “A moot question surely, you’re already tracing this. I wasn’t sure whether to call but I have some things I need to say and I’d rather do it over the phone.” 

“If you’re about to apologize, then you should know I only accept apologies in person. You’ll have to come here and do it,” there was a light-heartedness to his words. Did the man actually want him to go back? After everything? 

Despite himself, Loki chuckled, “Then I suppose I shall have to go unforgiven but, nonetheless, I am sorry, Tony, for deceiving you.” 

Tony paused for a second then, seeming to catch on to the gravity of Loki’s demeanour, his voice turned serious, “Why’d you do it? If you’d told me, we could’ve worked something out that meant you didn’t have to go anywhere. You didn’t need to steal from me for me to tell him that you did.” 

“This hinged on Thanos believing that you were no longer involved with me,” Loki explained regretfully, “Forgive me, Tony, you may well be willing to risk your life on your ability to lie, I am not,” a ghost of a smile played at Loki’s lips as he considered giving an example of just one of the times Tony had tried and failed to lie to him, but moment passed. 

“When are you coming back?” 

The smile died as Loki registered the genuine nature of the question. Tony hadn’t come to this conclusion yet or at the least he was denying it. He swallowed against the lump in his throat, “I’m not.” 

There was a pause as Tony tried to work out the joke but it quickly became clear he was serious, “What are you talking about?” 

There was a note of surprise in Tony’s voice and it struck a deep, bittersweet nerve. Loki hadn’t anticipated that Tony would want anything but to be rid of him after what he had done. But that second of pleasant surprise twisted quickly into a deep sorrow as it only made the fact that he would never see the man again that much worse. He lowered his gaze to his feet as be answered, “I can’t come back Tony, all it would do is bring Thanos with me.” 

“And you don’t think I can handle him? Is that it?” Tony sounded almost offended. He was still trying to keep this as nothing more than a joke. 

“I fear that you will try,” Loki replied with as firm a voice as he could manage, “And I cannot bear to imagine the consequences of that.”  

“But you’re happy to put me through the same thing?”  

“Tony, I-" 

“Cos that’s what you’re doing,” righteous irritation laced his words as he cut Loki off almost immediately, ”Four days, Loki, you’ve been doing it. 96 hours in which you could’ve been dead for all I knew. And now you’re telling me I get to carry on with this, for, what? Forever?”  

Loki closed his eyes as the understanding of what his disappearance had done to Tony struck a painful blow, “If there was another way then I would take it. Gods know I want nothing more than to spare you this, but-"  

“It seems simple enough to me, just come back here. Or better yet, tell me where you are, I’ll come get you. I can get to you a hell of a lot faster than you can get to me. Easy,” Tony spoke as though he truly believed it was that simple and Loki couldn’t tell whether it was naivety or just desperate hope. He couldn’t tell which was worse. 

“I would in a second if it did not risk you,” Loki said quietly, not trusting the roiling emotions in his mind not to spill over into his words. He would not see this final conversation be one of malice. 

“I’m not some princess in a tower, Mario, I don’t need protecting, especially from you!” Tony snapped, apparently unconcerned or unwilling to believe that this may be the last time they speak and not sharing Loki’s desire to maintain civility, “If you want to come back so bad then just do it. Remember what you said? If you can’t do something just because you wanted to, then what was the point of ever trying to get away from Thanos in the first place!”  

“What I want!” Loki bit back then paused to calm himself the continued, softer, as he gazed at the dirty floor of the booth, “What I want is to see you in a health and happiness that I have done nothing but threaten since the moment we met.” 

“You wanna know what I want?” Tony asked rhetorically, continuing before Loki could even open his mouth, “What I want is you. I want you safe. I want you here with me. I want you home!” he stopped, but if he was waiting for an answer from Loki, he would be disappointed. Even if he could find the words, Loki could not trust himself to answer. Eventually, Tony realized he would not get a response and gave a long shuddering exhale, the sound of which brought a blur of tears to Loki’s eyes that lined the lower edge of his vision. He knew that exhale well enough from the nightmares and anxieties that Loki had comforted the man through. And now he was a hundred miles away and could do nothing but listen helplessly. “I don’t think I can deal with this without you.”  

Loki’s throat burned as he said, “Of course you can.”  

“No. I don’t think I can,” Tony was talking quietly, worriedly, and Loki wanted nothing more than to go to him, hold him as he had so many times before. Tony would shudder and bury himself in Loki’s neck as he hushed him gently, apologizing again and again for everything. His whole body ached in the impotent desire. He screwed his eyes shut against the feeling as Tony continued, “L, I haven’t slept since you left, food makes me feel sick, I can barely bring myself to leave this godforsaken Tower. I...,” his train of thought drifted into silence but there had a poorly concealed tremor to Tony's voice and Loki clenched his jaw instinctively, if only to stop himself caving there and then. “I...Jesus...Thanos was fucking Afghanistan, L. I need you. Just come back, we can work something out.”  

The cold air prickled at the trail left as a tear fell down his cheek. He was quiet for a moment as he gathered up his thoughts and shoved them to one side, instead reminded himself why he’d left in the first place. It was not hard. The image of Tony wandering the desert, bloodied, beaten, tortured, was burned into his mind since Colonel Rhodes award ceremony. And his own night with those people had left no doubt in his mind that, at least this time, Thanos was not bluffing. Tony had the support to get him through this, but he would not survive any other nights like the one Loki had suffered. And Loki would not survive the knowledge that he had brought that down on him, “...I can’t be the person to get you through this Tony and you cannot know how sorry I am for that...” he breathed, then inhaled as he watched a tear fall to the ground and looked out towards the sunrise again, “I should go. Jarvis can’t be far off my location.”  

“L don’t go,” the tremor was replaced by barely controlled panic, that tore at Loki in a way that nothing else had, “Please, don’t hang up that pho-" 

“I love you, Tony Stark,” the words tumbled from his lips before he could stop them and seemed to surprise Tony as much as it did himself because the man fell silent mid-sentence. 

“No.” Loki could hear the pain in Tony’s suddenly dangerously calm voice. “Not over the phone. I’ll say it in person or not at all. Loki, are you listening to me? L-" 

But Loki was not. He could not bring himself to listen anymore. He lowered the headset and left the booth. 

**** 

The dial tone droned into his ear and Tony fell silent, still pressing the phone to his ear, hoping that it was a mistake, a break in the line, anything that meant Loki was still there. But the tone continued and Tony let the phone drop to his side, staring wide-eyed into the middle distance.  

“You alright, Tony?” Clint asked cautiously.  

Tony had taken a few steps away from them as it had become clear that this was not the conversation he was wanting to have, but Clint sounded a hundred miles away. 

“Hey can I get my phone back?” the kid said.  

The oblivious annoyance in the kid’s voice snapped Tony out of his thoughts and he inhaled sharply. There was no time for this. Not now. He couldn’t deal with this on his own and trying would only cripple Loki’s chances. Logically, this changed nothing. It didn’t matter what Loki thought. The guy was on the run, scared, too scared to be thinking straight. He’d run out of cash soon and then it wouldn’t be long before Thanos caught up to him. It didn’t matter that he was talking like it was the last time the two would speak again, Tony would be damned if he was going to let someone else decided when he could see Loki again.  

“No,” he ran a hand over his face to dismiss the remaining thoughts and turned on his heels to face them, starting to walk back towards them, in long confident strides.  

“What the hell? You can’t just take my stuff,” the kid took a step forward but Clint grabbed the back of his shirt and dragged him back before he could go any further.  

“Did he say where he was?” Clint was watching him carefully, still holding the box with the Heart in it in his other hand, while the kid was stood with his arms crossed. 

“In his questionable wisdom, Loki has made the executive decision that he is too dangerous to be seen again,” Tony told him, forcing the nonchalance into his voice, but not quite being able to bring himself to meet Clint’s gaze just yet, instead making a show of inspecting the phone as though it may have some clues as to his whereabouts.  

“Not a decision you agree with?” Clint replied, already knowing where this was going, a soft smile playing at his lips.  

“What gave it away?” Tony muttered, finally lifting his gaze to look at the kid who had was wearing an expression of bored irritation that Tony knew all too well, “Kid, sorry, not sorry, but I’m keeping this and you’re going to go with my friend here. He's going to ask you some questions and you’re going to tell him everything you know about the guy who paid you,” he looked to Clint, “Give him whatever he wants. Money, new phone, a pony, I could give a shit as long as he tells us where he met Loki and what he was told. Jarvis will have gotten a state and a county by now, maybe even a town, he’ll have it ready for you as soon as you ask.” The relaying of instructions worked to combat his racing thoughts. He had a lead, he had a witness, he had a starting point in the triangulation that Jarvis will have picked up. Whether Loki had meant it to be or not, it was more than they had had in four days. And it was everything that Thanos did not. “In the meantime, I want you guys to look into Thanos and the Titan conglomerate and get me every dark mark on their grimy file.” 

“That the guy Loki is running from?”  

Tony nodded, suppressing the soft whispers of fear that now came unbidden at the mention of his name, “Loki won’t come back here if Thanos is still a threat. I’m going to speak to Steve and Pep about what we can do above board but I’m not going to stop you from doing what you do under the radar. I’m sure you’ve still got some stuff hidden away that you and Nat happened to ‘miss’,” he gave air quotes, “during the reshuffle. I don’t want to know what it is, but use whatever you need to.” 

Clint rose an eyebrow but didn’t comment.  

“I'll speak to Thor. His dad has been on the receiving end of Thanos as well, he might have some useful information,” Tony glanced away. He hadn’t spoken to Thor since he’d told him the news of his brother’s disappearance. He hadn’t taken it well. The last he’d heard, the guy was boarding a plane back home to speak to his father about something, “Let me know if there’s anything you need from me.” 

“Sounds good,” Clint concluded once he was sure that Tony wasn’t going to continue. He lowered the box with Heart in it carefully on the nearby sofa, “There is one thing I’ll need.” 

“What’s that?” Tony asked eagerly, looking back to him.  

“I need you to get some sleep,” Clint fixed him with a serious look and Tony scowled, but before he could protest, Clint continued, “You look like shit and nothing is going to change for at least a few hours. I’ll be up here the second it does,” Clint offered a thin smile and then headed for the lift, the kid trailing behind him. 

Tony exhaled and once he was alone, he glanced at the bedroom door. Clint was right, of course he was, and so was Jarvis, and Pepper and Steve. They were all right and he knew that deep down. He was surviving on caffeine and the micro-sleeps that occurred in the seconds where he closed his eyes a little too long before he remembered himself and forced them open again. But he could not bear the thought of sleeping in that bed alone.  

He lowered himself onto the sofa, being careful not to knock the box from its perch, and leaned back into its corner. His thoughts drifted the moment he reclined into the cushions and for the brief seconds before sleep snatched him from consciousness, he could almost feel Loki’s bare chest and his warm arms embracing him.  

 _I love you, Tony Stark._  

As Tony slipped into sleep, he swore he wouldn’t be giving up until he could hear it in person.  


	28. Chapter 28

It had been over two weeks since that phonecall from Loki and in the time since, Tony’s penthouse had transitioned into something that more closely resembled some sort of situation room than a living space. A blue holographic map of the full east coast covered the glass wall of the room, rising from floor to ceiling. New York City was glowing brightly about two thirds up the wall and a number of red dots were scattered around it, some connected by lines, others stood alone, each one highlighting a confirmed sighting of Loki. A few slightly smaller, but not insignificant holographic screens hung in the air to the side, showing a constantly scrolling stream of various social medias as Jarvis carried out his constant surveillance for any mention of the man.

Tony sat on his sofa in front of the low coffee table that was barely visible under the number of scattered papers, and empty plates and coffee cups, reading the latest report he’d been sent from Clint. Loki was exceptional at disappearing. His trail across the country looked to be completely random, and it most likely was, given that this was probably the first time the guy had been out of the city. Following the information that the courier had given them, Clint and Nat had picked up a fairly substantial trail.

He’d left them to it. Tony was not a tracker and his anxiety had not exactly been forgiving recently, especially when he tried to leave the Tower. After a couple of panic attacks that almost rivalled the ones he’d suffered before he’d started actual therapy, Steve and Pepper had put him on sick leave, officially taking lead on the business and leaving him to his Penthouse. They checked in regularly with food and water and making sure he was sleeping best he could under the circumstances, but mostly they left him alone.

But Tony couldn’t just sit around.

He exhaled as he tossed the set of papers into the pile with the rest. Nothing. The trail was starting to go cold. He slumped back into the cushions of the sofa and stared up at the mess of dots on the map, hoping that maybe this time a pattern would emerge. But nothing happened.

The sound of the elevator arriving caught his attention but he didn’t move. Steve and Pepper had taken to turning up out of the blue to check that he hadn’t somehow snuck alcohol or something worse up here. They would bring him some form of food, maybe some water, try to make small talk and leave again. He sat up a little as the doors slid open.

“Good afternoon, Tony,” the unexpected voice of Thor greeted from somewhere behind him.

Tony turned to find Thor stepping out of the lift, a sad smile on his face, which Tony met with a curious frown, “Didn’t know you were back?”

“My flight landed this morning, I came straight here,” Thor told him, taking a couple of steps closer, his gaze lifting to the various holographic windows set up around the room, “I was told you weren’t feeling yourself.”

Tony stood from the sofa in politeness, “I’ve been better,” he muttered, snatching one of the mugs from the table, “Want a drink? Jet lagged?”

“I’m good, thank you.”

Tony nodded and made himself one anyway.

“I apologize it has taken me so long to return.”

“I don’t blame you, I’d want to be out of here too if I could,” Tony replied, sipping his coffee, “How’d you get on with what we talked about?”

Thor took a deep breath and Tony could already tell the news was not good, “My Father does not want to involve himself or Asgard in this. He believes that the risk of the less public activities of Asgard surfacing is too great to take for one man,” he said, darkly, clearly disagreeing with the sentiment as he continued, speaking as though he was reciting a prepared statement, “No matter who that man is.”

Tony nodded, making some quick mental adjustments, “Alright, doesn’t matter. Would’ve been helpful but not necessary.”

Thor’s forehead twitched a little, “Necessary for what?”

“The upside of PTSD related insomnia is that you have a lot of time to think,” Tony explained, tapping his temple with his free hand, returning to his coffee table, “I have a job for you, if you’re still willing to help against daddy’s wishes.”

“Of course,” Thor nodded.

Tony set his cup down on the table and began digging through the papers. Thor joined him at the table. It took a few seconds to find the right ones, but eventually Tony pulled out a set of blank forms that he tapped on the table a couple of times to neaten up and then stood upright again.

“Here,” he handed them to Thor.

“What are these?” Thor asked, taking them and flicking through them.

Tony opened his mouth to explain, when the sound of his muffled cell phone ring tone interrupted. He dug his phone out of his pocket and scowled at the screen. The number was blocked. He glanced up at Thor who met his gaze and asked the question they were both thinking.

“Could it be Loki?”

“Let’s find out shall we?” Tony took a final sip of coffee and answered the call, with his most formal greeting, “Stark, speaking.”

“Good afternoon, Stark,” Thanos’s deep voice triggered a spike in the perpetual nausea that had settled in Tony's gut and he had to fight his immediate reaction just to put the phone down there and then. But if Thanos had taken the time to find out his personal cell phone number and call him out of the blue, what he had to say would be important, “Thank you for taking my call.”

Thor must have seen his expression change because his features hardened immediately.

“Thanos,” Tony managed, scrabbling to get his thoughts together, “This is unexpected, I’m kinda busy so will this be quick?”

“Hopefully.”

Tony locked eyes with Thor as he said, “I’m gonna put you on speaker then, my hands are pretty full.”

“Are you alone?”

“Yep,” Tony lied, but he was already in the process of connecting the phone to Jarvis’s speakers throughout the room, “Right then, clock’s ticking. What’s up?”

“I was hoping to discuss our fugitive,” Thanos’s voice sounded omnipresent and Thor glanced around, not having experienced this before.

“You found him?” Tony held Thor’s gaze as he asked.

“No, I’m afraid not,” Thanos replied and Thor’s shoulders dropped visibly, Tony had to fight the relieved exhale that came reactively, “Have you?”

“Not yet.”

“Then perhaps, a collaboration would be in order. A combined effort to reach a mutual goal.”

Tony physically winced as even the thought of working with Thanos twisted something in his stomach. Every logical part of him was telling him to agree, maintain the ruse, find out what Thanos knew, and use it against him. That would be the smart move. That’s would be the Loki move. But he did not have Loki’s strength to work under pressure, he could not lie like Loki could, and he could not bring himself to pretend that Thanos was an ally. After a moment of internal debate, his mouth spoke without permission.

“No.”

“I’m sorry?”

Thor was frowning at him in silent question. Even he could see the opportunity being lost here. Tony glanced at him briefly and then looked away, concentrating on the ground at his feet, “I said no.”

Thanos was silent for a second, clearly not expecting the response, “Can I ask why?”

Tony exhaled audibly, “Look, I’m not like you, or Loki for that matter. I prefer to lay it out straight so, here goes,” he swallowed, “I know what you’ve been up to, Thanos. And I know what you did to me, so the chances of me agreeing to work with you ever again are lower than Jack Frost surviving in hell.”

“I’m afraid I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Yeah, didn’t think you would,” Tony sniffed, “Good thing I don’t need you to.”

“But you need Loki,” Thanos inferred with an accuracy that stunned Tony immediately.

He didn’t reply, not trusting himself to come up with any sort of response that would gloss over the fact that he’d had his legal team combing through every shred of ‘evidence’ they could find only to conclude that it was all worthless without something to string it all together. Or, more accurately, someone.

Thanos chuckled at his own small win, “A shame, then, that he has disappeared so completely. You had better hope you find him first, Stark. I can’t guarantee he will be in a fit state to testify anything if I do.”

“I’m not one of your lackeys, Baldy,” Tony snapped, “You can’t just mutter a vaguely threatening phrase and hope I’m suddenly quaking in my boots. Even Loki stopped falling for that. After six years of your abuse, he escaped you, with just a few hours head start and a handful of cash. Loki is in the wind and you had to come crawling to me for help. That’s gotta hurt.”

A note of satisfaction muted some of the panic in Tony’s mind as Thanos remained silent.

“You wanna know what I have?” Tony continued, “I have the country’s most technologically advanced corporation at my disposal. I designed 75% of the software that runs the government’s surveillance and the other 25% is just a phonecall away if I felt like using it. I have friends in the US Marshals, the FBI, and the Air Force. Finding people is what they do. What do you have? A handful of stolen patents and list of idle threats that, quite frankly, are boring. I’m not scared of you.”

“That sounds like a long list of people who would happily add Loki’s arrest to their resume,” Thanos said, a note of smugness to his voice as he pinpointed the one flaw in the plans that Tony had been developing, “You somehow forget that Loki Laufeyson is a known corporate thief, who once attempted even to steal from me. It was only my mercy that saved him from the fate he rightfully deserves. How exactly do you propose to keep him safe from his own history now that my good grace has run dry?”

“I don’t answer to you,” Tony quipped, much more flippantly than he felt, “The sound of your voice is literally making me feel sick and the cost of cleaning my carpet is not worth the time I’ve already wasted on this conversation. Thanks for calling.”

With that, Tony made a vague gesture and Jarvis severed the connection. The following silence felt thick and Tony could feel the weight of Thor’s gaze on him, but he made no move to meet it.

“You sounded confident,” Thor commented when it became clear that Tony was not going to speak first, “Do you truly think you can find him?”

The question snapped Tony back to the present and he lifted his free hand to rub his hand over his face then finished off his coffee before answering, “Finding him was never the issue. Give me enough time, I could find Elvis wherever he’s hiding. The issue is the race against a megalomaniac who has got possession of Loki’s legal identity forms and likely written proof of the operation that got him into this Thanos mess in the first place, which puts you and your dad in the firing line.”

“To hell with my Father, what can we do to protect Loki?” the anger in Thor’s voice took Tony by surprise and he flinched away a little. Seeing the reaction, took a calming breath, “Loki is in this situation because of something my Father forced him to do. If there are any consequences to him because of that, then so be it.”

Tony regarded him for a moment then rubbed his unkempt stubble, “Well there is one option, but you’re not going to like it. I’d hoped to avoid it altogether, but looks like we’re starting to run out of time.”

Thor’s expression darkened, “What is it? How do we protect Loki?”

Tony inhaled, readying himself for the reaction, “We don’t. Realistically, he is a criminal, not to mention and illegal alien while Thanos holds his papers hostage. We can protect Loki from Thanos or we protect him from the law. We can’t do both.”

Thor’s jaw clenched and a note of restrained anger filled his expression.

Tony held his hands up, “Believe me when I say I wish there was another way, but arrested is better than dead as far as I’m concerned.”

“So you’re just going to hand him over?!”

“Not quite,” Tony returned to the table again and began rummaging, “I wasn’t kidding when I said I had contacts everywhere,” he pulled out a small business card and presented it to Thor, “Agent Coulson is an FBI who owes me a favor. I’d been hoping to save it for my own inevitable warrant, but priorities change. I’ve been considering calling for a few days now, but I didn’t want to pull the trigger on this until I was sure there was no other way. And I’d say, my own running mouth has just made sure of that.”

Thor calmed, though his nostrils still flared a little, “And he will help us?”

“Probably,” Tony said, dialing the number on the card into his cell phone, “In meantime, I still need your help.”

“With what?”

Tony nodded at the forms in Thor’s grip, “That is the best information I could find on Norway’s embassy website about passports, that sort of thing. And I’ve filled out the parts that I think are needed. But I’m not the person to talk to them face to face. As his family and his former colleague, you might be convey this rather tricky situation to them a little better.”

“Very well,” Thor said eyeing the forms with a confused frown, “I’ll do what I can, but I suspect they may be unwilling to grant papers to a convicted criminal, even if he is a national.”

“Let them know that he can be sponsored by Stark Industries. There’s a letter amongst those papers that as well,” Tony told him, pressing his cell to his ear as the number rang, “Let me know how if they need any more evidence of that. I’ll do whatever they need.”

Thor looked as though he was about to question him, but instead just nodded and headed for the elevator, forms in hand. Tony took a deep breath and looked back up to the map, noticing with a little glimmer of hope, that a new dot had been added.

“Agent Coulson, speaking.”

Tony smiled into the phone, “Afternoon, Agent. Tony Stark, long time no speak. Listen, I’m calling in that favor.”

******

There was a chill in the late-night air that indicated that summer truly had ended. Loki pulled his jacket a little closer around him as he sat alone in the covered bus stop on a lamp-lit street he did not know the name of, in an unknown town. His journey had been made up of coach trips and train rides selected at random that had crisscrossed him across the country in such a way that he had quickly lost track of his direction and distance from New York City. Logically, he knew that was a good thing. If he did not know where he was, neither could Thanos. But it did nothing to alleviate the deep ache that had settled in his chest with the realization that he had no idea how far he was from Tony.

He exhaled through his nose as he held the paparazzi headshot he’d snatched up in the few minutes he’d spent in his apartment before he had set the ball rolling on his own personal nightmare about three weeks ago. Tony was grinning up at him and despite his best efforts to the contrary, the image did very little to erase the memory of the man’s final panicked beg for him not to leave.

He rubbed his eyes with his thumb and forefinger. His time on the move was beginning to take its toll, especially more recently now that his limited funds were beginning to dry up. A couple of close calls with those who were seeking him had meant that any sort of restful sleep was difficult to come by. Given that he had gone a few days without any incident, his plans for this night had been to find a motel, but now that the bus had dropped him off in what seemed to be just a residential little town, he was starting to realize he would have to reconsider.

“Hey, I know you!”

The sudden voice made Loki jump, sending the photo fluttering to the ground. Logic kicked in a moment later and the voice registered as belonging to a child. A boy no more than twelve perhaps, that was stood bundled in a thick winter coat a little way off to his left, peering at him from under a thick mop of dark blond hair.

Loki regarded him flatly, “Didn’t your parents ever teach you not to sneak up on people in the dead of night?” he spat, reaching down to collect the photo, giving it a once over and removing the flecks of dirt it had collected.

The child looked appropriately abashed at the venom in Loki’s words, “Sorry,” he mumbled, “I wanted to see if I was right. You’re Tony Stark’s boyfriend, aren’t you?”

The sound of his name made him clench his jaw, but Loki shoved the reaction to one side as he carefully slid the photo back into its place in the inner pocket of his jacket, “I’m afraid you’re mistaken.”

“Then why have you got a photo of him?” the boy came closer, taking a seat beside him without being asked, still gazing up at him.

Loki rose an eyebrow as the boy settled down, then glanced up and down the street as he realized, there were no adults in sight, “Do you often wander the streets late at night talking to strangers?”

The boy didn’t address the issue, “If you’re here, does that mean Tony’s here to?”

“No,” Loki exhaled, “He’s not.”

“That’s a shame,” the boy said a little sadly, fidgeting his hands in his lap, his feet swinging, not quite touching the ground, “He promised he’d visit again soon.”

Loki frowned down at him, “Again? Has he been here before?”

The boy looked up at him and nodded eagerly then pointed out of the bus shelter to a building that rose up over the other buildings in the area, tall but somehow not out of place amongst the suburban townscape, “He built that, after the big storm came and knocked out all our electricity last year. Mom said that he did it for free,” the boy looked back to Loki, his chest puffed up a little with pride, “I showed him around the town while he stayed, and he upgraded my potato gun too.”

A soft smile pulled at Loki’s lips as he looked up at the building. A testament to the generosity and intelligence of the man he loved. He looked back to the boy, “Don’t be disheartened that he has not returned yet, little one. Tony always keeps his promises,” the smile faded a little, “Even if it is goes against all better judgement to the contrary.”

The boy regarded him silently for a moment, “Did he promise you something too?”

“You could say that.”

The boy frowned, “But you don’t want him to do it?”

“Perceptive child, aren’t you?” Loki’s small smile took on an impressed note as he considered what exactly he was doing speaking to this child that was wondering around the streets late at night. Perhaps he just enjoyed the company, something he’d not had in the three weeks on the run, perhaps it was the opportunity to talk about Tony in a unique scenario in which he could be confident of his safety. Thankfully, Thanos was not in the habit of hiring children. He briefly even considered he might be hallucinating. “If Tony tries to help me, he might get hurt. And I don’t want that.”

“Tony could never get hurt,” the boy replied, sounding bemused that Loki would even consider that, “Did you know that he got kidnapped once?” he asked with excitement that only the naivety of childhood could lend to the discussion of kidnapping.

“I did,” Loki confirmed, once he was sure he could.

“Well, he escaped from that nice and easy and I bet whatever you need help with isn’t nearly as bad as that,” the boy beamed, his childish innocence making him glow as he spoke but it did nothing to light the dark memory of Tony’s beaten form stumbling through the desert. Loki dropped his gaze, if only to avoid dimming this boy’s glee. There was a beat of silence before the boy asked, “How come you’re all the way out here, and not with Tony?”

“It’s complicated, child.”

“Are you in trouble?”

“Where are your parents?” Loki asked, finally looking back at him and ignoring the question, “It’s late for a child to be out on his own.”

“I’m not on my own, I’m with you,” he replied, expertly skirting the question.

Loki smirked a little at the boy’s logic, “That’s not what I meant,” with that he reached down to pick up the backpack from the ground at his feet, “I should go, but I do not feel comfortable leaving a child out in the night on his own. I’ll walk you home,” Loki rose to his feet, “Where do you live?”

The boy hopped up as Loki stood, “Sure, it’s this way, not far,” and he set off walking down the road, with Loki walking beside him making sure to limit his usually long strides to keep pace, “You should let him help you, you know. Whatever trouble you’re in, he’ll solve the problem. He’s real smart.”

Loki sighed and looked down at him, “That he is, but this is not simply a broken potato gun that needs repair. It’s somewhat different.”

The boy was silent for a moment as he considered the point, then shrugged to himself and changed the topic, “What’s he like?”

“Did you not say you had met him?”

“Well, yeah, but only for like a few hours. I didn’t get to go to the Tower. I bet it’s really cool in there...Did you get to see his garage?” he gasped audibly and almost came to a halt, “Or the workshop?! Did you get to see what he’s working on?!”

Loki couldn’t help the smile that crept onto his lips at the boy’s wonder, “I did.”

The boy looked enthralled and his walk took on a slight skip as he tried to turn to face him as the two walked together, “Can you tell me what it was like?”

Loki inhaled ready to break the news to the boy that the last thing he wanted to do was talk about the Tower, the workshop, or the man he’d left behind but as he looked down into the boy’s wide eyes, he found himself unable to do it. He exhaled, let the smile on his face linger and began to tell him all he could.

As they walked, Loki told him about how they’d met, the real time, not the engineered one. How Tony had helped him find his way home. He told him about the labs and what he could about what projects were underway there, or at least, the ones he understood. He told him about the holographic phonecalls and the private satellites that could take photos of space wherever Tony wanted. He told him about the ice-skating which lead to a short argument with the boy who disbelieved that Tony could be bad anything. Loki lamented destroying his phone if only because he could not show him the various pictures Loki had taken of Tony being bad at various things in their time together. Finally, he told him that even though he couldn’t tell him what was in there, he assured him that it was very much beyond ‘really cool’.

By the time he was finished, the boy’s mouth was open and Loki chuckled at his speechlessness, though it was made bittersweet as he realized it was the first time he’d laughed since he’d left New York City.

“Wow...” he breathed, “I heard that Tony doesn’t let anyone in the workshop. He must really like you!”

“Yes...” his chuckle ended but a small smile remained, “I suppose he might have.”

The boy was still grinning as he turned suddenly and began to walk up a garden path to a house with a light on in the porch over the front door, “Well this is my house,” he pulled a key out of his coat pocket and unlocked the door then frowned back to Loki who had stopped at the foot of the porch steps, “You coming in?”

“You should not be in the habit of inviting strangers into your house,” Loki chastised, not moving.

“You’re not a stranger, you’re Tony’s boyfriend.”

Loki shook his head, “I’m not, child.”

The boy’s shoulders drooped a little, “Oh...what happened?”

Loki swallowed as the pleasant warmth that had been forming from this simple conversation was cooled instantly, “...I happened. I am not a good person to know.”

“You seem like person good to me.”

“I appreciate your words, but you do not know me,” Loki said, placatingly to try not to disappoint this boy too much more than he clearly already had.

“Tony must have thought so too.”

The comment stung unexpectedly, and Loki paused to fight the sensation, “Thank you for letting me walk you home. Now get some sleep, it must be well past your bedtime.”

“Where are you staying?” the boy asked, a concerned frown on his forehead, “It gets cold here at night, you could stay here if you want. Mom wouldn’t be back until the morning so she wouldn’t know.”

“I appreciate the offer, little one, but I must regretfully decline. Though I would ask that you please stop talking to strangers in the street, no matter how related to Tony Stark you think they may be,” with that, Loki turned to leave. He was a few steps away down the path when the boy called after him.

“Hey, my name’s Harley by the way. What’s yours?”

Loki stopped and looked back over his shoulder, “...Loki,” he said, then gave a conspiratorial smile, “But that’s a secret, alright?”

The boy grinned, “Sure! And if you change your mind, I’ll be making cocoa!”

"Goodnight, Harley,” and with that, Loki continued off down the nameless street.

****

It was past midnight and Tony was reaching the 77th hour of sustained consciousness. It was getting towards the edge of even Tony’s limits, but he needed to finish this tonight before his arranged meeting with Agent Coulson the next morning. And then he would get some sleep.

His cell phone rang and a corresponding picture flashed up on the holographic screen in front of him to show a picture of Clint Barton. He answered it immediately.

“What news, Barton?”

“Two things, one I’m disappointed that you’re still awake,” Clint replied, “And two there’s a kid on the phone for you, called that number you hand out to every kid who crosses your path apparently. We need to talk about that at some point.”

“Who I give my number to is no concern of yours, Barton,” Tony said, "Does this mystery kid have a name?”

“Says his name is Harley.”

Tony sighed, “Put him through,” he rubbed his eyes and waited until he heard the familiar noise of a call connection, “Kid, how many times do I need to tell you, I gave you this number is for emergencies only. Is it actually an emergency this time? Because a broken Xbox controller is still not an emergency.”

“No that’s still working after the last time you fixed it,” Harley said, sounding more confident than most adults who spoke to him.

“Then why are you calling? And more importantly, why are you still awake? It is well past your bedtime.”

“Well, I was just talking to Loki and-”

The rest of the sentence might as well have been white noise because the very mention of the man’s name smashed through Tony's haze of exhaustion with a burst of adrenaline that seemed to eliminate the use of all of his other senses. He shook his head and tried to concentrate properly. He needed to concentrate.

“Wait, wait wait. Kid, hold up. Did you just say you talked to Loki? Is he there?”

“Yeah, he was just here,” Harley said, sounding a little thrown by the flurry of Tony’s words, “He didn’t want to stay, though. I think he's in trouble, so I thought that might count as an emergency.”

Tony gave a relieved exhale. Loki was alive and now he knew where he was. Couldn’t get a much fresher trail than this. Tony looked up at the map that was still up on his wall. “Kid, I owe you, big time, again. Don’t tell anyone else that you saw him ok? That’s very important, you understand?”

“Sure,” Harley said uncertainly, then hesitated a moment before asking, “Are you going to come get him? You coming to visit?!”

Tony gave a breathy laugh, “Yeah, kid. Keep an eye out, I’ll be there by the end of the week. There’s just one or two things I need to get straight first,” he looked back to the document he was reading, “I know you should be in bed right now but...I need you to tell me everything.”

 


	29. Chapter 29

The gun barrel felt cold against the back of his head as the man who Loki suspected he would never learn the name of, pressed it a little harder against his scalp. 

“Where is it?” he asked, for the third time, his tone still professionally calm.  

For the third time, Loki didn’t respond. He remained still in the kneeling position he’d been forced into by the man with the gun not long after they’d stepped out of the car, now parked behind him at the side of the lonely highway. His shadow stretched out in front of him. The headlights of the car parked behind them was the only source of illumination in the empty countryside and cast his visage several meters out before him, elongated by the torso of the gunman standing over him. To one side of it, he could see another shadow figure hunched over, rummaging through a shadow backpack. Loki watched idly from the corner of his eye, not entirely unaware that he should really be feeling something as a result of the barrel nestled in his messed hair. Perhaps he might have done, had they caught up to him a week earlier, while he still had the money for food or shelter or any particular reason to keep running. Now, all his felt was relief that it was all finally over.  

It had been three days since he’d rested. Nearly two since he’d seen any form of civilization. The small towns had become fewer and further between the farther he walked. In fact, until this more recent encounter it had been almost as long since he had seen another person. Since Harley.  

“It’s not here,” the second man was not so concerned about concealing his frustration, discarding the backpack and its meagre contents to one side. Loki watched the shadow grow until its source appeared as a pair of expensive leather shoes in his peripheral vision, “What have you done with it?”  

Loki raised his head, pushing deliberately back on the gun barrel as he did. The man was glaring down on him. He didn’t know this man’s name either but he did recognize the face. A face last seen sneering down in malicious joy as one survived night of torment was not easily forgotten. But it was not joyful now. 

“I’m afraid I don’t know what you’re referring to,” Loki smiled as widely as he could manage.  

The gun was shoved sharply into his skull, knocking his head forward and he withheld a grunt of pain.  

“He’s already sold it,” the gunman muttered.  

“You think we'd have found him wandering along the side of a highway on a night like this if he’d sold it?” his partner snapped back, “Look at him.”  

Even if he had the energy to, Loki would not have wasted it arguing with these men. He remained still, his head lowered, eyes half lidded, just waiting patiently for the click that could finish the whole saga.  

After a moment of silence, the man at his side exhaled, “Just kill him. We can still get paid for that part.”  

A cold spear of adrenaline lanced through Loki as his last feeble remnant of a will to live clamored to force him into action. It managed to straighten his spine a little, but nothing more. What was the point? The Heart was safe. It had made it back home. Tony was safe and other than some reported leave, seemed to be surviving as well as could be expected. Loki was just so tired of it all. As he lifted his gaze slowly to take in the wide-open landscape, he concluded that this roadside seemed as good as any for it to end. It was remote, miles away from anyone who could get hurt, they wouldn’t find him for months, if they found him at all. Not that there would be anyone searching particularly hard, Loki suspected. 

Loki closed his eyes, a soft smile playing at his lips. A part of him was sorry that it ended this way, that he had been so close to something more, but there was no reality where his dreams could be fulfilled. Tony had done more for him than anyone before him and he would die, satisfied in the knowledge that in return he had done all he could to defend him from an enemy that was hell bent on breaking him. He hoped it was enough.  

The hammer of a pistol clicked and Loki exhaled slowly. Calm for the first time in weeks.  

“Wait,” he heard the man to his left hiss the order.  

Irritation at the stay of execution laced through him. What could they possibly be waiting for other than to torment him just that little bit more? He cracked his eyes open a little to see a set of headlights speeding along the highway towards them. The three stood in tense silence as the car began to slow. Stupid fool, Loki thought to himself, knowing full well just how easily these two men could get away with killing whoever was in that car. Nothing ever came of a good deed for a stranger.  

The pressure of the gun against his head dropped away and Loki was able to turn his head fully to watch as the car slowed to a stop on the road alongside where they were stood. It was a jeep, deep green and two doored. If Loki had to guess it looked as though it perhaps had been military at one time or even still was. As it rolled to a stop and the driver window was lowered, it took a force of will for Loki not to react. His two captors seemed too preoccupied on their impromptu guest to notice his sudden tension.  

“Everything ok here?” Colonel James Rhodes leant one elbow out of the car window, its engine purring quietly. Loki stared at him, hoping to catch his gaze, to somehow tell him to leave, quickly, and not return. But Colonel Rhodes knew better than to look away from the man with a gun in his hand. 

The man without the gun took a couple of steps closer to the car, “This is private business sir, I suggest you move along quickly.” 

“Well, actually, given you’re within 5km of a military base, and you’ve been loitering around here for a good amount of time now, according to our surveillance, it really is my business,” Colonel Rhodes responded confidently.  

Loki narrowed his eyes slightly. He may not know this country well, but he had made sure to be aware of any form of military installation to avoid encounters such as this, and there was nothing of that sort anywhere near here. His captors though, were not so confident in that. The man without the gun hesitated a moment, holding Colonel Rhodes’ gaze before turning back to his compatriot, “Let’s go. We can handle this elsewhere.” 

At that, a hand gripped Loki’s upper arm painfully and dragged him up to his feet. Loki didn’t resist.  

“Hang on, he comes with me,” Colonel Rhodes interrupted, pointing in Loki’s direction, “He’s been loitering a lot more and we’ve got some questions.” 

“I’m afraid that's not going to happen,” the man without the gun spoke icily. The man with the gun reminded Loki of its existence as it was pressed into his back and used to guide him back towards the headlights.  

“So, you’re not compiling to my order?” Loki glanced up to see Colonel Rhodes shrug and reach for a radio transmitter fitted to the dashboard, “You got any documentation. I’m gonna need it for my report.” 

There was a tense pause before the man without the gun nodded curtly and Loki was shoved forward. The surprise almost sent him tripping over his own feet, but he righted himself after a couple of steps and took a moment to wait for some sort of gunshot. When it didn’t come, he pulled his shoulders back, ran a hand through his hair to move it from his eyes and looked back to his two, now former, captors.  

“We’ll be seeing you soon, Laufeyson.” 

“I don’t doubt it,” Loki flashed a grin as he walked around the jeep and pulled open the passenger door and he stepped up into it.  

Colonel Rhodes didn’t wait for the door to be closed before pulling away, accelerating quickly down the road. There was silence as Loki kept his gaze fixed on the red rear lights of the other car in the wing mirror of the jeep for as long as he could see them. Only once they crested a hill and the lights disappeared from view did he exhale audibly and sat back in the seat. He turned his head to Colonel Rhodes who was giving him an evaluative once over before looking back to the road. 

“I hope this does not offend you, but I did not expect you to be such a competent liar,” Loki commented, “There is no military facility near here, is there?” 

“Well maybe if we’d had a conversation that wasn’t immediately following saving your ass from a beating, we could have gotten to know each other a bit better,” Colonel Rhodes replied idly as he plucked a mobile phone from an alcove under the dashboard, “And as far as you or anyone who asks is concerned, no, there is no facility of any kind.” 

Loki frowned a little, the implication of a top secret military asset in the nearby vicinity was glossed over as he watched him unlock the phone, scroll through and then place it against his ear, “Who are you calling?” 

The raised eyebrow that Colonel Rhodes gave him was enough of an answer. That cold lance that had done so little when faced with his own death, now crackled up his spine and he found himself pressing against the door as though trying to hide himself there.  

“I suppose there is nothing I could say that make you hang up is there?” Loki asked, watching out of the window and beginning to judge what his chances might be if he were to simply jump out of the car.  

Colonel Rhodes didn’t even look at him this time, the call had been answered, “Yeah I got him. I couldn’t exactly be subtle about it but he’s fine. Looks like crap, but no worse than you did earlier.” 

There was a pause and Loki swallowed, knowing full well who was on the other end of the phone, but somehow completely at a loss as to how he felt about it. He wanted more than anything to speak to him again, to see him again, but not while the risk to him still hung heavy over them. More prominently, why was Tony still searching for him? Surely, he should have given in by now, unless of course there was still some punishment left to bring down on him.   

“You been drinking?”  

It took a second to realize that Colonel Rhodes was talking to him directly and he frowned, “...No.” 

“He says no,” there was a pause as Colonel Rhodes listened, then looked back to Loki briefly, “Yeah, we’ll be there soon.” 

With that, Colonel Rhodes hung up and put the phone back in its alcove.  

“Where are we going?” Loki asked quietly. 

“Think of it like an intervention,” Colonel Rhodes replied with a note of apology in his voice, “We’ve got a couple hours' drive and child locks are on, so might be worth getting some sleep. No offence but you look like you need it.” 

Loki exhaled and let his head fall back against the rest, as resigned exhaustion washed through him. He tried to form some kind of coherent thought train. But he could not sort through them. The only thing his mind could hold onto was the vague image of Tony’s face, caught in anguish as the sound of the man’s final words to him echoed around his head as sleep overtook him.  

******* 

Tony was pacing and had been for a while. Luckily, the conference room of the hotel he’d picked was significantly longer than it was wide and there was plenty of room for it alongside the conference table, despite it being lined by leather chairs on both sides. He’d given Rhodey a headsup to say that Loki had been sighted not far from one of their ‘super-secret’ weapons testing grounds the day before and thankfully, the Colonel had managed to arrange a ‘surprise inspection’ not long after. It was a good thing too, because when Rhodey then called to tell him that something had pinged on the base’s long-range scanners, they found out that Loki was not alone. The guy had been cagey about telling him exactly what was up. Tony shuddered to think what could have happened.  

It didn’t matter now. Loki was safe with Rhodey and on his way here, where Tony would finally show him his way out. As long as the guy was willing to listen.  

Tony paused in his pacing to realign the two documents he’d set out on the table, and pointlessly adjusted the jug of water and two glasses he’d requested be put here, despite the fact it was close to 3am now. Then he reached up to fiddle with his collar, and then his glasses, and then his suit, as if anything out of place would send Loki running from the room the moment he entered. That is, if Rhodey could convince him to come in here at all.  

When Rhodey had given the call that Loki was in sight, Tony had flown to the nearest airfield he could find as soon as he could find a crew for his plane, with just Happy in tow. They'd barely arrived at the hotel with enough time for Tony to shower, have a minor anxiety attack, and do his best to hide his exhaustion under an expensive suit and yellow tinted glasses. He’d stationed Happy in the hotel lobby outside as either guard or guide depending on who entered the reception.  

His attention snapped up at the sound of voices from beyond the only door to the room. Well, the sound of Happy talking cordially to someone as he approached the door. There was only one person it was going to be, not that there was any response. There was a knock at the door, and Tony cleared his voice and stood to face the door before calling out. 

“Yup, come in!” 

There was a moment of stillness before the door was pushed inward and he found himself holding his breath as Loki stepped inside. Rhodey’s assessment had been accurate, he did indeed look like crap. The guy was dressed all in black, jeans that were ripped and stained with dirt and dust, and an equally disheveled t-shirt was covered by a jacket that hung open, looking as though it now lacked the ability to close up. His face was dusty and his hair had coiled into the thick curls that were not usually allowed to form. Thankfully, there was no obvious injuries, no blood, no bruises and other than a trepidation that Tony was ready for, he stood with his shoulders back, apparently painlessly. Though, Tony was disheartened to see no emotion of any sort in those familiar green eyes. The guy was wearing his mask again.  

“I wasn’t sure you’d come,” Tony started hesitantly, “You alright?” 

“I’m as well as can be expected,” the sound of his voice struck a chord in Tony’s chest but Loki spoke as though addressing a stranger, ”and had I not the desire to know how you found me so I can avoid making the same mistake again I would not be here.”  

“You’re not exactly subtle in your appearance,” Tony answered, doing his best not to lose hope. This was what Loki did when he was protecting himself.  

Loki narrowed his eyes momentarily and then gave a slow nod as realization came over him, “The boy. I should have known you would have given him the means to contact you again. Thank you,” he paused a moment and swallowed. It was a minor tick of a movement but seeing it was enough to add just a little fuel to the little ember of hope that Tony was doing everything to protect. “It was good to see you again, Tony.” 

As he turned back for the door, Tony took a step forward, “L, wait. I didn’t track you across the country just to prove I could. I need to talk to you. Just give me ten minutes, twenty tops and after you’ve heard me out, if you still want to, you can walk. I swear I won’t stop you.” 

Loki had stopped in place, still half turned to the door, not looking at him.  

“Please,” Tony said quietly, “just listen.” 

There was an audible exhale and Loki looked back to him, “Very well. Twenty minutes.” 

Tony nodded quickly, and gestured to the chair near him, “Come sit down, I’m going to be doing a lot of talking and you look like you could use a bit of rest.” 

Loki crossed the room and took a seat in the chair Tony had pointed out, though not without casting a curious glance at the two documents deliberately laid out in his eyeline, “What is this about?” 

“It’s about you, it’s about your problem, and it’s about its solution,” Tony took a seat in the chair opposite him and pulled forward the slightly thinner of the two documents, and slid it across the table towards Loki.  

A frown had cracked the man’s mask as he began to read the typing on the first page. Tony watched him silently, searching his expression for any hint of what he might be thinking. It had been so long since he’d had to try, he felt out of practice. After a moment, Loki spoke with a note uncertainty, “This is a contract of employment,” at the realization, Loki’s eyes snapped up from the paper, the frown replaced with undisguised disdain. It stung to see it directed at him like that, but Tony readied himself for the response. “After everything that has happened, your grand solution is yet another faux career? How could that possibly work? And even if it could, quite frankly, I have had my fill of charades such as this.” 

“It’s not a charade,” Tony responded as calmly as he could despite Loki’s reaction, though the flicker of surprise that threatened Loki’s mask went someway to help that. The response had taken him back a little, and the disdain had softened to confusion as he looked back to the contract. “What you have there is a bespoke contract of employment between you, Loki Laufeyson, and Stark Industries. It’s honest, written by lawyers, and if signed, it is legally binding so read it carefully before you decide. Naturally, both the salary and benefits package are negotiable but I’d rather do it before it’s signed and not after. It’s to be reviewed every six months, in case, you know, change your mind down the line.” 

Loki had been skimming the document, flicking through the few pages, “Director of Social Engineering?” he looked up at Tony for an explanation.  

“It’s a more PR-friendly way of saying ‘counter-espionage’,” Tony explained, recalling just how difficult that conversation that had been, “Plus it side-steps some of the questions that might arise about why one might suddenly hire a counter-espionage specialist. The long and short of it is that you’d be doing what you did for Wakanda, or at least running the department that does the work should you want it to exist. Whether you want to hire people or do it yourself, that’d be up to you. We’d have to set a budget, but for the most part, I tend to let my Directors direct as they see fit. If they didn’t know what they were doing, then I wouldn’t have hired them. You’d pick your jobs, your clients, your working methods, etc etc and so on and so forth.” 

The mask had cracked a little further and Loki's brows had knitted together in subtle disbelief. But it was clear that it was not that he didn’t want to believe, “If this is real as you say this is, then this this is an exceptionally...generous offer, Tony, but I cannot accept. It's not that easy.” 

“Yeah didn’t think it would be,” Tony muttered, then scooted his chair a little closer, “Alright, let’s troubleshoot.” 

It was getting easier to read him as his armor was slipping. Loki clearly was not expecting to have this conversation, and he looked at him as though it was obvious, “Well, for one, the very purpose of my leaving was to eliminate any implication in Thanos’s eyes that we are connected. Employing me undermine that somewhat, wouldn’t you agree?” 

“On the contrary, I’d say it undermines it entirely,” Tony corrected, nonchalantly, “But no more than I’ve already done when I told Thanos where to stick it last time he and I spoke.” 

Loki’s eyes narrowed. For a second, he looked as though he was going to snap something irritated, but he tensed his jaw and shook his head slightly, deciding against it. “The other, more pressing issue, is that I cannot legally sign this contract. As far as your government is concerned, I am an illegal immigrant with a criminal history. I have no right to work in this country. This contract would be void.” 

“I know,” Tony nodded, “I’m not an expert on immigration law, nor am I fluent enough in your language to dream of beginning to negotiate a new passport on your behalf. Thor on the other hand...” 

“Thor?” Loki asked quietly, “He’s involved in this?” 

“Oh yeah, the guy practically disowned his father to do it too,” Tony offered a small smile, but Loki wasn’t for mirroring it. Though the ice that laced his demeanor was melting, his shoulders had rounded and his expression was open and he was listening. It was a step in the right direction, “He’s got enough evidence to prove that you are who you say you are and he assures me that all it would take is a quick trip to the embassy to sign off the documentation as long as you have a sponsor on US soil as well,” Tony told him, that little flame of hope still burning, though he was not sure whether it survive the next revelation, “Admittedly, the criminal history is a bit of a sticking point. I’ve had my guys looking at it from every angle they can think of but there’s no way around it, so a traditional working visa is a bit out of the question. But, there is a way I can help you stay in the country.” 

“I don’t understand.” 

Tony took a deep breath. It had been going remarkably well so far, but this little bit of icing was going to make or break this cake. He reached out and passed over the second document, “There’s no getting away from it so I did the best I could to work with it.” 

“This is an FBI document,” Loki said quietly the moment he looked at the front page, then his eyes snapped up to Tony with a vicious demand for an explanation, “Must I now have the Federal Bureau of Investigation hounding my every step as well?” 

“Given you seem to be ready for death as the alternative, you didn’t leave me much choice!” Tony snapped back, then calmed himself, “I’ll give you all the time you need to read it, but cliff notes are that they need you pull together the circumstantial evidence from the Dot. If you plead guilty to being an unwilling accomplice to what Thanos has been doing, you’d serve seven years. In those seven years, you have the opportunity to work with the FBI under the protection of my legal team, to package up the circumstantial stuff and make it stick. As an incentive, you’d get time served for every patent overturned and any charges they can land.” 

Loki’s expression was gradually softening as Tony spoke, his reactive anger melting away, leaving him looking as vulnerable as he had the day he’d left. One he was finished, Loki looked back to the pieces of paper before him, “These are real?” 

“As real as I could make them,” Tony replied, then sat forward. He wanted to reach out, to touch him but this was still a frail truce and he could not risk losing it now, “I can’t make you sign either of these, they would void if I did. There is no condition that you have to sign both if you sign one,” he reached out and touch the contract, “You sign this, we leave here tonight, back to the tower. You meet my legal guys who can prepare you for whatever legal process is to come but without the plea I couldn’t tell you what that process would be.” Tony touched the plea deal. “You sign this, you come with me to meet Agent Coulson, a friend of mine and he’ll start this ball rolling, but without the contract, I don’t how much involvement or help I can be allowed to give once it’s started.” He sat back again and held his hands up, palms forward, “Of course, you could sign neither. Our twenty minutes will run out. You stand up, walk out of here. I don’t follow and the FBI wouldn’t know where you are either. You’re in the wind, for good.” 

Loki was silent for a long time, glancing between the two documents he was holding, occasionally he’d lift a page and read a little more, only to cross-reference it into the other document. Tony was content to watch him. The fact that he hadn’t bolted already meant that he had already moved out of the worst-case scenario that Tony had envisioned. After a while, Loki’s brow twitched as he came across something. He pointed to it and showed it to Tony, “What is this ‘house arrest’ clause?” 

“Oh, that is a bonus that only applies if you sign both,” Tony said, enjoying the proximity of the man, “Coulson let me add that myself. Given you’d be an employee of Stark Industries who is no threat to society on any macroscale, he agreed that you could serve your seven years at Stark Tower,” Tony explained and Loki’s whole body shifted a little. “There’d be an ankle monitor specifically not designed by Stark Industries, and heavily monitored access to the internet, but it’s a bit comfier than a prison cell.” 

Loki was staring at him, incredulous, “You did this in three weeks?”  

“Well, what else was I supposed to be doing while you were off on your hitch-hiking tour of America?” Tony answered and relished the twitch of Loki’s lips as the guy fought a smile, “Imagine what I could’ve done in four months.”  

“I don’t know what to say,” Loki breathed after a moment.  

“Say yes,” Tony said shortly, “Say yes, sign your name, and we leave here tonight. After a shower, or dinner or whatever you need, obviously.” 

Loki shook his head, but there was an immense sadness to it, “You must know that I can’t do that.” 

Tony’s forehead twitched, “Um, no, I don’t know that.” 

“Your friend didn’t mention this as far as I know, but as he arrived, I had a gun pressed to the back of my head, and do you know what I felt?” 

The revelation opened a pit in Tony’s stomach. He’d known how close Thanos was but the confirmation was not a pleasant experience. “I actually don’t think I want to know.”  

“I felt relief, because you were safe,” Loki answered anyway. Then picked up the papers and shook them a little, “This? This is undoing every step I’ve taken to keep Thanos from you.” 

“Forget Thanos,” Tony said sternly.  

Loki scowled at him, “Forget Thanos...Ah yes, of course, perfect, let me just get right on that and all of our problems will be over,” he said sarcastically, then slammed the papers back onto the table, “Tony, you don’t seem to be understanding,” the guy paused for breath to calm himself a little, “For all of my life, I have been numb. I forced myself into apathy because it was kinder than to confront the reality of my life. Eventually that apathy had become to cemented to my core that I came to believe that I was simply hollow. For years and years, my moral compass was nothing more than success or failure, and there was nothing else in between that mattered. Nothing and no one has shaken that. Until you.” 

Tony felt his breathing begin to deepen and he felt Loki’s intense gaze.  

Loki exhaled as he continued, “For reasons that I cannot honestly say that I fully comprehend, you changed everything. You systematically dismantled every concept I held about myself and you showed me that I am not the husk of a man I thought I was,” he paused and was watching him, “Every step I have taken to undo the pain and wrongdoing that I have inflicted is because of you. You are somehow simultaneously the questions I ask and the answers I need about who I am. Simply put you  _are_  this war I am waging, the first blow and the reason to fight it. Tony you must understand that I have nothing left. Thanos has taken it all from me. My home, my family, my identity,” he faltered again and his jaw tensed, though he did nothing to hide the glistening in his eyes as continued, “You are my first, my last, and everything in between and I would live these last few days a lifetime over if it meant that he could not take you too.”  

Tony was too focused on trying to find something to say to be able to react at all.  

Loki exhaled and looked away, and pushed the papers back towards Tony, “So, thank you for your offer, but I must decline because there is nothing in this world that is worth risking you again.” 

A second of silence ticked by before Tony finally found his tongue, “You know, I can only hope that one day I can be as fluent in English as you are,” he swallowed and shifted in his seat, then sniffed and leant forward, placing his hand on the papers, “I am fluent in this. Carefully planned, legally binding documentation. This is my word that for as long as you wish it, I will protect you with all every ounce of my not insignificant force. When I say forget Thanos, I mean it. Without you, and without his anonymity, he is nothing. There wasn’t enough on the Dot to charge him, but it was enough to get the FBI interested. He can’t sneeze without them combing through it see what’s in it. We’re winning. As much as I hated it, your reckless plan worked. It saved me,” he pushed the papers back towards him, “Now let me use mine to save you.” 

Loki was silent, eyeing the papers.  

“Look at me,” after a second, Loki did. “You are so  _close_ to the end of this. Too close to give it up to a bullet on the side of a highway. As much as you seem to think otherwise, you don’t deserve that. This is what you deserve. Take it. Sign the papers. Come home.” 

“Home...” Loki breathed, “You’d welcome me back even now?” 

“In a heartbeat. I already told you once, but I’ll tell you again every time you need to hear it. I want you, with me, for as long as we want it to last,” Tony licked his lips, “I love you, you stubborn bastard, and I don’t know how many different ways I can show you that, but I won’t get the opportunity to find out if you’re going to give up now.” 

Loki inhaled at the words and closed his eyes for a moment, before a slight, nervous smile pulled at his lips. It was radiant to see. “I imagine that to be called a stubborn bastard by Tony Stark himself is not a feat that many can claim.” 

Tony smiled and relaxed back into his chair.   

With a deep breath, Loki pulled the documents towards him, “I suppose you have a pen to hand?”   

Tony reached into his inner jacket pocket for the slim silver ballpoint he kept there and held it out, “Can I tell Happy to get the jet ready?” 

Loki took the pen, the smile maintaining, “Let me make sure that whatever this benefits package is suitable before we go anywhere,” he replied easily, a hint of the Loki Tony knew and loved peeking back out from under the tired visage as he turned his attention back to the contract.  

“Of course, I’ll give you a few minutes,” Tony said, as he pushed himself out of the chair, taking a moment to straighten his jacket before taking a step towards the door. Only to be stopped as Loki’s hand reached out and slipped into his as he passed. The sensation of the man’s cool skin sent sparks up his spine as he suddenly realized how long three weeks could truly be. He looked down at his hand and then to Loki, who was looking at their hands with a note of surprise then raised his eyes to Tony’s.  

“Stay?” he asked quietly, “I fear that if you leave this room, whatever dreamscape this is will collapse around me.” 

Tony tightened his grip on Loki’s hand. After a moment of deliberation, he leant down so their eyes faces were level. He lifted a hand and gently brushed the edge of Loki’s jaw as he slipped it around to rest against the back his neck. Despite the weeks on the run, his skin felt soft and smooth. Loki held still at the touch, but Tony felt a slight weight against his palm as Loki pressed his cheek against it. It was all the confirmation that Tony needed to cover the last gap between them and catch his lips with his own. It was water to a dying man, and Tony drank in the scent of Loki only barely masked by earth and dust, the sensation of his soft lips against his own, and the slight tightening of their hands. It was soft, and quick, and there was the lingering promise of something more as Tony pulled away a little.  

“Feels pretty real to me,” he said, quietly, very much aware of the thud of his heartbeat in his chest. He brushed his thumb over Loki’s cheek, then stood upright so he could lean on the table in Loki’s eyeline, “I’m not going anywhere.”  

Loki held his gaze for a long, glorious moment, then reluctantly withdrew his hand so that he could flip through the contract and begin to read it fully. There was a few minutes of silence as Loki read through both things thoroughly and when he came to the blank entry for a signature, the guy swallowed, glanced at Tony one final time, and then in a flourish that only Loki could be capable of, signed his name.  

“Welcome aboard, director,” Tony said, smiling as Loki stood slowly, the signed documents in hands.  Tony held out his hand, “C’mon, let’s go home.” 

Loki gave a breathy, disbelieving laugh, and took the offered hand.  

 


	30. Chapter 30

This false reality was persisting much longer than Loki could ever have hoped for. Too long for simply a hallucination. It was becoming increasingly more likely that he had in fact died on the side of that highway and by the will of some unjust god, he had done enough to find his peace in whatever passed for the afterlife.  

Tony’s solution had somehow been everything he could ever had hoped for and it had come at the one moment that he had been ready to simply give up. It was beyond anything Loki could have devised which put a little more weight behind the afterlife argument. The only thing that had shaken his morbid belief had been the moment he hard reached for Tony's hand and he did not pass straight through him as he had expected to. Not that the true nature of this purgatory mattered, Loki was willing to go along with it if it meant he could stay close to Tony for however long it lasted. 

Once he’d done as asked and passed Tony the two sets of papers, now marked with his signature, Tony had whisked him from the room with barely another word. Happy fell into step beside them on their way out, listening intently as Tony gave his orders in short clear sentences. Colonel Rhodes was still waiting in the idling jeep outside the entrance to the hotel. He and Tony shared some playful words as the group climbed in, but Loki wasn't concentrating enough to catch them. Happy got into the front seat, while Tony and Loki got into the back. An immense tiredness come over him as Loki took his seat. Perhaps he could not find reprieve from exhaustion even in death. It seemed a fitting punishment, he supposed as he rested his head against the headrest, eyes half-lidded, to live in the image of his heaven, only to be mocked by his inability to endure it. 

The jeep pulled away and journey was filled with the sound of Tony’s voice as the man made phone call after phone call after phone call with no mention of who he was talking to or why. Loki was more than happy to leave him to it. It didn’t matter who this construct of Tony was talking to, it was able to match the sound of his voice, his intonation and his perpetually sarcastic manner and that was enough. Loki simply watched the countryside go by, soothed by the voice he’d missed so much. Tiredness attempted to hold his eyes closed but he forced them to remain open for fear that should he fall asleep he would be sucked from this dreamscape forever into whatever lay beyond this purgatory. 

He kept his fingers entwined with Tony’s, hoping it would serve an anchor to whatever plane of reality this was.  

After a time unknown, the car pulled up at an airfield where a jet was awaiting them. Tony said his grateful goodbyes to Rhodey, but Loki could only find the energy for a quick, vacant nod. Did it even matter? Loki would never see this version of Colonel Rhodes again anyway once this fantasy was over.  

Tony was still on the phone as he led Loki aboard the jet, but he was confident and shining with that smug pride that Loki had once been naïve enough to believe was all the man was. Loki did his best to reciprocate and allowed himself to be guided to a seat. Tony continued his phone calls and commands until the captain of the plane had to physically take his phone from him so the jet could take off safely. It would have been amusing in reality but in this world, Loki could only offer a twitching smirk and let his head fall back against the headrest, turning it slightly to watch the ground fall away underneath them. 

Tony’s energy for talking was apparently endless and what had once directed to onto the phone was now aimed at Loki and Happy. He chattered in that unique, unbreathing manner as the real Tony had once done when he was nervous or excited. Loki was glad to see that his purgatory had not lost the memories of who Tony had been. He looked back from the dark sky out the window and though he was answered what he could in no more than a few words or tired nods. He wasn’t sure why he could not bring himself to make conversation. Perhaps he was out of practice, perhaps he was scared that should be put a word wrong or misspeak a phrase it may cause some cosmic glitch would bring this wondrous fantasy crashing down around him. Dream-Tony seemed understanding, encouraging him to get some rest, but Loki shook his head and deliberately sat up to try to force the fatigue into obedience. There would be plenty of time for rest once this inevitably ended. 

The jet landed some indeterminate time later, during which Tony’s expression had shifted gradually from excited to concerned. Loki had smiled and assured that everything was fine, but it was becoming harder to keep his eyes open.  

They were met on the runway by Steve Rogers, a man armed with a bow of all things, and a woman with red hair and twin pistols. Loki didn't recognize either of the latter two but they were introduced as Clint Barton and Natasha Romanov. On seeing them, Loki briefly considered whether a dead brain had the ability to invent people, particularly ones so distinctive. The introductions were brief, though, and Tony handed off Loki’s documents to Steve who disappeared into a car with Ms Romanov, while Tony, Loki, Mr Barton and Happy got in another.  

The drive to Stark Tower was short. The early morning sun was barely lighting the city and the only traffic on the roads were a few cabs homeward bound now the sunrise brought their graveyard shift to an end. The city looked almost beautiful in this quiet, low light. This was the city he could have been happy in.  

Then he felt his head droop a little in the car and suddenly, they had pulled up at the Tower.  

Had he slept? Loki shook his head a little as his door was opened for him and he stared out of it bleary eyed, his vision feeling unfocused before realizing that Tony was waiting for him to get out of the car. 

Stark Tower rose up before him. He inhaled as he stared up at it and a wild smile grew on his lips, and Tony reciprocated. They were silent as the group crossed the lobby and all stepped into the elevator, each person pressing their own button. First Steve and Happy stepped out, with a promise to be back within the hour. A couple of floors later, Clint and Natasha stepped out to the sound of a promised raise called after them by Tony. And finally they were alone.  

That exhaustion that had hounded him for the whole journey was beginning to overwhelm. The ingrained comfort of Tony’s proximity had relaxed him dangerously close to unconsciousness and he wasn’t sure he would make it to the end of this lift. 

Loki tightened his grip on Tony’s hand and curled into him, pressing his chest against him and his head coming to rest against Tony’s temple. Tony reacted only a second later, turning and pulling his hand free of Loki's only so that he could reach up and wrap both arms around Loki’s neck. Loki folded his arms around the man and turned his head so that his mouth was pressed lightly against the bare skin of his neck. His chest expanded against painful ribs as he inhaled, taking in Tony’s cologne, the one he reserved for only special occasions, and deeply comforting scent of the man underneath that. This man who had saved him. Who had found him in a bar just few months ago and carried him home. Who had found him fighting with his long-lost brother and brought about their reunion. Who had believed in him, cared for him, and for reasons that defied any and all logic, had loved him.  

He felt Tony’s chest expand and contract against him as the man sighed contentedly and they embraced in perfect silence. Loki did everything in his power to commit this moment to memory or whatever might serve as memory in what would come once he gave into that exhaustion and this purgatory collapsed. It would not be long now. 

The moment the elevator announced its arrival to the Penthouse, Loki felt his knees buckle. Tony apparently felt it too because his arms tightened and he heard his name being spoken in hurried panic somewhere nearby. Loki’s arms however lost their grip and he felt himself falling.  

“I love you, Tony Stark...” 

And the world went dark.  

***** 

Surprise was Loki’s first emotion upon regaining consciousness. Surprise at the very concept  _of_  regaining consciousness.  

Loki’s eyes snapped open to find himself in a darkened room. He sat up quickly, eyes darting about trying to find any hint of where he might be. Where was he? Where were his belongings? He needed to get moving. Wherever he was, he could not stay. They would catch up to him if he stayed.  

A flurry of memories came not long after and he reached up to gently probe the back of his head with both hands. There were no bullet wound there as he has suspected. He patted himself down, hands moving over bare chest and other than the quiet ache of fractured ribs that should have really received medical attention at the time, he found himself unharmed, if a little underweight. The shirtlessness was unexpected though. Someone had undressed him. Thankfully, he still appeared to be wearing underwear.  

He took a moment to calm himself, take a breath, evaluate, adapt, survive. He ran his hand over the covers he found himself under. They were silk. The soft mattress on which he found himself sitting was ridiculously soft. It was familiar. He exhaled and looked around again, a confused scowl on his face.  

This was Tony’s room. Tony’s bed.  

Had it been real? Loki’s breathing quickened again as the realization crashed over him in a tsunami.  

That was real. He had signed a contract of employment. He had a signed a plea deal. But neither of those was more concerning than the fact that he had no idea how long had passed since then. Thanos had to have found out by now. Which meant that Tony... 

Loki reached out to both sides of him hurriedly, probing the sheets. There was no Tony.  

Where was he? Had something happened? 

Loki kicked off the sheets, and scrambled for the door.  

“Tony,” Loki breathed, as he went. It took a second in his panicked state to find the door handle in the darkness, calling out as he went, “Tony!”  

“Loki?” the voice that called back was not the one he had expected but it was equally familiar.  

“Thor?” Loki pushed through the door to the lounge sun lit to find Thor standing from the sofas and turning towards him. It was mid-afternoon judging by the full, bright sun shining in through the window wall. 

His brother beamed unreservedly and rushed to cover the distance between them, enveloping him in his arms before Loki had a chance to go more than two steps from the bedroom doorway. Loki gave a shaky exhale and for the first time in more than six years, he closed his eyes and allowed himself to relax into it.  

“It’s so good to see you, brother,” Thor said, as quietly as Loki suspected the man was capable of, not releasing him just yet. Loki did not protest, despite the pain in his ribs and the fact he was not completely dressed. His brother’s arms were solid and warm, and very real. “I thought you’d...Gods I don’t know what I thought. But it doesn’t matter now, you’re here now.” 

Loki met Thor’s eyes as the man took a step back from him, a smile was latching to his face as this...reality...began to take root, “Not in small part because of you, from what I understand.” 

Thor laughed and shook his head, “A minor role only. It is Tony who deserves your gratitude more than I.” 

Loki nodded and glanced around eagerly, “Speaking of, where is he? How long have I been asleep?” 

“He is safe,” Thor assured him, “He called me a few hours ago when you had collapsed. I helped carry you to bed then he told me had a few things to attend to, so I said I would wait here for you to wake up. Neither of us could bear the thought of you being alone.” 

Loki scowled, “What things? What more could possibly need to be done now?” 

Thor looked grave, “Thanos knows you’re here,” he began and immediately, any ounce of joy that Loki had dared to feel shriveled and died. It apparently was writ clear on his face because Thor immediately held his hands up in a calming gesture, “Fear not. Tony is safe, but you may not be.” 

“When have I ever been safe…” Loki muttered, exhaling, “But I suppose I should ask how exactly my life is forfeit this time.”  

“He has released your information,” Thor answered with forced neutrality, “You are not anonymous anymore Loki. Anyone you may have come across now knows your face, your name, and likely your currently whereabouts.” 

“Then I must leave,” Loki concluded. He turned to the bedroom to find his clothes and the means to do just that when he felt Thor’s hand grip his arm and he looked back.  

“Tony saw this coming,” Thor told him, seriously, “That’s where he is now. He’s getting out in front of it. This is his world and he is king here, he knows what he’s doing. He asked you to trust him.” 

Loki’s gaze twitched anxiously between Thor’s earnest blue eyes before exhaling forcefully and he pulled his arm from Thor’s grip, “Very well...” 

“Good,” Thor replied, smiling once again, “Though you should get dressed anyway. I’m supposed to take you to Agent Coulson. You have clean clothes in one of Tony’s wardrobe. I’ll wait here.” 

Loki levelled his gaze at the man for a moment before huffing and heading back into the bedroom.  

***** 

Thanos had done exactly what Tony had expected him to and released Loki’s information to the public, alongside some inflated claims that the guy had tried to take down his company from within. That big bald moron had thought that the heat it would bring would make Tony to balk and back off, leaving Loki exposed again. Despite it not being his area of expertise, Tony knew rival CEOs well enough to know that they were usually too up their own asses to assume that there was any other way of thinking than their own. Thanos had assumed that Tony would react how he had. With a truck load of denial, and a quick off-loading of the problem, namely Loki. But that wasn’t how Tony operated.  

Press conferences were always a little hit and miss, especially when they were arranged at such short notice like this. It had been planned from the beginning, but Tony needed it seem reactive. This was the one part of the deal that Loki hadn’t been told about. The guy definitely wouldn’t have stuck around if he had been told that Tony had no intention of keeping his presence at Stark Tower a secret. PR had managed to have him disguise the job title but they could go fuck themselves if they thought that he was going to put any more effort into the secrecy than that.  

When the call had gone out at 4am this morning just before he’d guided an only semi-conscious Loki on to the jet, a surprising number of people had RSVP’d. Thanos had been quick off the mark with his information and the news that Stark Industries was affiliated with a corporate spy was the hottest gossip.  

Tony ran his eyes over the faces in the small crowd of about twenty or so people  sat in the neat rows of chairs set out in one of the smaller press rooms of Stark Tower. Some were familiar. Some not. Some were generally in favor of Stark Industries. Some were not. All of them were pretending to listen as Pepper gave a short introduction and her thanks for their presence, but it wasn't hard to see their glances tick sideways occasionally to run their eyes over Tony and the accompanying FBI agent he was stood with, trying to glean some inkling of what he could be about to divulge. The agent had not been Tony’s choice, Coulson wanted to make sure that he stuck within the legal limits. 

He was pulled from his thoughts as Pepper announced his name and stepped down from the podium. There was a tense silence as Tony made his way to the front of the room, forgoing the podium to simply stand in front of them. He let the quiet draw out for a dramatic second before he sniffed and stuffed his hands in his pockets.  

“I’ve got a lot to do today so I’d like to make this quick. Is this being recorded?” he glanced up at the cameras at the back of the room then to Pepper at the side who nodded, “Ok good. That’ll make things easier. Let’s just get into the juicy bits. You’ve heard a few rumors about certain new hires we might have made. First of all, I’ll confirm that Loki Laufeyson, formerly of the Titan Conglomerate and, prior to that, of Asgard has, indeed, very recently taken up a position as Director of Social Engineering here at Stark Industries. I could go into detail about exactly what that entails but I don’t think you especially care do you?” 

“What explanation do you have for the accusations that Mr Laufeyson is a corporate thief?” called one of the braver reporters from the front row.  

“Yeah, didn’t think you would,” Tony mumbled then continued louder, “I don’t have an explanation. No explanation needed. It’s true,” there was a soft murmuring amongst the group but Tony continued before any questions were raised, “Loki is a corporate thief and a very good one, might I add. He managed to walk out my front door with a piece of kit you guys don’t even know exist yet. More come on that in the next couple of months but not important right now.” 

“He stole from you, so you hired him?” that same reporter asked, showing a disappointing disinterest in Tony’s Heart project.   

“I did.” 

There was an uncertain quiet in the room before a man at the back of the room called asked, “Why?” 

Tony smiled, lifted a hand and wagged a finger at him, “You know I am so glad you asked, otherwise this would have been a super boring little catch up would it? Now, naturally, the obvious answer is that Loki is exceptional at what he does and because of that, he’s exceptional at stopping other people from doing it too. But that’s not the answer you got up at 4am and cancelled your meetings to be here for is it? No, you want the difficult answer. I don’t blame you, this one is much more interesting,” he paused and smiled, the crowd sat in riveted silence, pens resting on notepads, recording devices out. Ready for him. “You’ll have all heard the sad tale of the Titan Conglomerate and its run in with Mr Laufeyson, ending in failure for the latter and apparent injustice for the former and now Thanos is accusing me of harboring a criminal. You know me, I don’t like baseless accusations. So, I want you guys to make couple of important clarifications when all this goes to print. Firstly, yes, Loki did try steal from Thanos. Probably deserved it too, but that’s not the point. The point is, there was no injustice, there was only Thanos’s justice. For his crime, Loki served six years on the man’s leash, no home, no family, no life, trapped here in a foreign country made to continue his crimes under Thanos's orders. Just as an aside, did  _no one_ notice how successful they’ve suddenly gotten in the last few years? Look into that. It was at Thanos’s orders that Loki found himself at my doorstep. Not a smart move.” Tony was pleased to see not a single face inattentive or disbelieving as he continued, “I’m not harboring anyone. This morning Loki plead guilty to his theft from Stark Tower and for a number of other things that the partypoopers in black over there have told me I’m not allowed to divulge right now. Loki is now considered a convicted felon, employed by Stark Industries, and as such is under my supervision as much as the FBI’s. And I won’t have slanderous claims be thrown around about my people." 

A hand went up from the middle of the crowd and Tony raised an eyebrow at her, “That’s all well and good, Mr Stark, but Mr Laufeyson is a criminal that has ruined the lives and businesses of many people here in New York. How can you be affiliated with such a man?” 

It was a fair question, and one he had been expecting. “As part of his sentence, Loki will be working to undo what damage he has done while wielded by Thanos. I can affiliated with a man who has voluntarily signed his freedom away to do that. Actually on that note, FBI need to know his hitlist. They have asked that anyone who believes they have had a run in with Loki Laufeyson to get in contact,” he glanced off to the side, to Pepper, “I can only hope his photo is being broadcast alongside this because I have literally no idea how many names the guy has used over the years, and I’m sure he doesn’t either. No matter how insignificant the interaction may have been, you have may well have played a part in a bigger picture.” 

A hand flew up from the crowd of journalists and Tony acknowledged them with a nod of the head, “Why are you investing your time and money in this one man? If he is the  criminal as you say he is, and has stolen from you as well, then why not simply hand him to the FBI and be done with it?” 

“Good question,” Tony answered then pretended to think about it for a moment.  

This had been another one that had been expected, but trying to work out what response to give had been difficult. How was he supposed to explain why he was doing this in such a way that wouldn’t distract the reporters from the point here? He wanted more than anything to simply tell them the kind of person Loki truly was. Not the Loki who was a thief and a spy, but the Loki who’d sat with him through PTSD nightmares even though every survival instinct would have been to the contrary. The Loki who had read him like an open book within hours of their meeting, and seen every flaw, every weakness, every fear and trigger, and done nothing but stand beside him in calm solidarity. The Loki who had undergone years of mental and physical abuse and was still ready and willing to fight the guy responsible for it him hostage these last few years. The Loki who had welcomed a bullet to the skull if it meant those he loved had been kept safe.  

But that was not what a professional press conference was about.  

Tony looked back to the question asker and gave the short, practiced answer he’d developed a few hours before walking into this room, “A couple of years ago, the wool was pulled off my eyes as to what it actually was to be a weapons dealer. Old story short, it was crappy. A hell of a lot worse than what Loki’s done. Sadly our justice system seems to disagree and if he hadn’t wanted to do something to redeem himself legally, the FBI wouldn’t be involved at all. But more than that, this endeavor is about  me find justice that I didn’t even know I was looking for. You have come here asking for answers about a criminal, but you’re looking for the wrong one,” he glanced sideways at the FBI representative stood close to the door who nodded slightly. Tony set his mouth in a grim line and readied himself, “The following was recorded in the office of the CEO of Titan Conglomerate, just over a month ago, and is a conversation between Thanos, and his associate at the time, Loki Laufeyson. The topic of which is yours truly.” He whirled a hand in the air and with that played the card he’d somehow managed to keep up his sleeve since Loki left. 

Expectant silence reigned for a second as the audio loaded before Loki’s voice cut through the room. 

_You were Afghanistan?_  

_I did what I had to secure his loyalty._  

It had been one hell of an argument to let him even play those two lines from the audio that had since been classified as evidence. But it was enough.  

The soft, curious murmuring of the reporters exploded into full blown yelling as all of them threw their hands into the air and cried his name, hoping to get something, anything more to add to their stories. But that wasn’t Tony’s job anymore.  

Tony simply held up his hands and took a step back from the clamoring, grinning as he spoke, “Any further questions, please direct them to Thanos of the Titan Conglomerate,” he called over the noise, “It seems like he has a fair bit to answer for.” With that he held up two fingers in the peace sign and strode towards the side door to where Pepper was waiting, a wry half-smile resting on her face, “Work your magic Pep and make sure they don’t riot too much. Remember we are on high alert until further notice, I’ve got one criminal on my ass and another one to manage.” 

“And remind me, which one was Loki?” she asked playfully, before laughing as Tony rose his eyebrow at her, “He’s awake by the way. You’d better get up there. I’ll get these guys out.” 

“Don’t tell, Rogers, but you’re my favorite,” Tony smiled and disappeared from the room, making a beeline for the lifts that would take him up to Loki’s brand-new office.  

***** 

Without the cushion of exhaustion to soften the blows of reality, it was all a little hard to process.  

Just twelve hours ago, Loki had been ready to close his eyes and let a gunshot be the final noise he heard on this Earth. But now, he was leant against  _his own desk_  in  _his own office_ , while a suited agent of the FBI knelt at his feet in the final stages of programming the GPS ankle bracelet now strapped to his left leg, while the man he’d been introduced to as Agent Coulson was stood nearby, watching with that small, perpetual smile. On top of that, he’d just watched Tony not only publicly acknowledge his presence within Stark Industries, but also threw the metaphorical gauntlet at Thanos’s feet in the form of the recording of the Dot.  

Loki exhaled he watched Pepper stride back out in front of the uproarious crowd and began to calm them. Tony had disappeared from the room. He glanced sideways to where Thor was seated in one of the armchairs,  _his armchairs,_  that had been set up around a table, on which there had been a plate of sandwiches and pastries, though it was somewhat emptier than it had been when they’d first entered.  

“I assumed that keeping this from me until the tracking device is permanently in place was a part of the plan?” Loki asked, casually. 

Thor finished the pastry he was chewing on then smiled at him, “Would you have stayed if we hadn’t?” 

Loki didn’t answer, simply looked back to the screen, but it had dissipated. Beyond where it had been, the double doors to the office had been pulled open and Tony was striding in, that familiar confident bounce to his step. Loki smiled reactively to his presence. 

“How are we getting on in the dressing room?” Tony asked generally as he strode in, glancing around, eyes lingering on Loki and then the man with the ankle bracelet before moving on to Thor, “You know they weren’t all for you.” 

Thor picked up another, maintaining defiant eye contact as he did so.  

Tony pressed his lips together but didn’t say anything else, instead crossing the office to stand next to Loki, looking down at the agent installing the anklet, “All plugged in and ready to stay within one very clearly defined area?” 

Loki looked down as the agent moved away to revel a slim, black band of metal and rubber now resting around his ankle, “It appears so.” 

Agent Coulson exchanged a look with his partner and then nodded, “We are all set up here. The limits are set to the base plan of this building with the ability to travel to the embassy with prior consent.” 

Tony hadn’t lifted his gaze from the ankle bracelet, head tilted as he inspected it, “Is that the Hammertek 4500? Are you still using that stone-age scrap metal? I could get that off with a plastic spork in three minutes flat wearing a blindfold,” he flicked his gaze up to Agent Coulson. 

The FBI agent was clearly experienced in Tony’s specific brand of humor and his soft smile remained in place, “If you attempt to hack this in any way, your friend here will be sent to prison and you will face criminal charges. And I wouldn’t need any cutlery.” 

Tony lifted his gaze to meet Coulson’s a single eyebrow raised, “But you know I could if I wanted to, right? It’s very important to me that you know that I could.” 

“We will be in touch tomorrow, Stark,” Coulson replied calmly, then looked back to Loki, “Mr Laufeyson, I appreciate your cooperation.” 

Loki inclined his head a little and with that, Agent Coulson and his colleague walked from the room. Loki flexed his ankle experimentally.  The band was remarkably comfortable for a permanent tracking device, if a little heavy, the weight of its implication could not be discounted. Seven years and a criminal record. It was not exactly inconsequential.  

“How you feeling?” Tony asked, breaking into Loki’s thoughts, “You gave us a bit of scare back there Sleeping Beauty.” 

Loki nodded and lifted his gaze back to Tony, “Reality is slowly setting in.” 

“About time. It’s a good thing there weren’t any lawyers hanging around to hear you babbling on purgatory versus hallucination,” Tony wandered over to Thor who scowled as Tony snatched the pastry he had just picked up from the tray and took a bite from it himself, “It might well have been enough to void the contracts you’d just signed.” 

“That would be a shame, especially after such a wonderful speech you gave in my defense,” Loki laid one hand over his heart, “I’m touched.” 

Tony chewed through a mouthful of stolen pastry before replying, “You should be. I had to go on camera without my make-up people around, if that’s not love then I don’t know what is,” with that, he stuffed the rest of the food in his mouth.  

Loki chuckled quietly and folded his arms over his chest, “So what happens now?” 

“You go to work,” Tony replied simply, “Like I said, this isn’t a charade, you’re not just here to sit around, drink coffee, and make me look philanthropic. You’ve got a full Jarvis hook up, he’ll give you any information you need for a full assessment of our systems. Look for weak spots. Just do what you do, or what you did. Let me know what you find. Once that’s done, Wakanda wants you to do the same for them. Best guess at how long you think it’ll take you would be useful. Your services don’t come cheap. People are gonna be paying a lot of money for the privilege of having you break into their companies.” 

Loki listened intently, pleased to find the foreign feeling of excitement growing in his mind, sprouting from the roots of his new reality. The beginnings of his redemption. “And what of the other side of this endeavor?” 

Tony shrugged with a reassuring nonchalance, “Well, now that I’ve set all of the journalists of Wall Street and beyond on Thanos’s tail, he’ll be running for cover we don’t have much pressure anymore, but how things will work day to day is in Coulson’s ball park. All I know is that you should start compiling a list of all the people and companies you can remember, and what you took, if you know. I don’t know if the FBI deal in brownie points but it can’t hurt to try. I’ve got somewhere for you start if you want it.” 

Loki frowned a little, “Who is it?” 

“Your old bridge partner.” 

Loki lifted his chin in realization, “The man from the alley.” 

“That’s the one. I put a tag on him the day after your run in. I was going to try and use it to work out who you worked for but didn’t matter in the end. I actually forgot about it until yesterday.” 

The residual ache of Loki’s ribs seemed to pulse as the memories of that night flashed across his mind and he dropped his gaze, one hand absently rubbing his side.  

“No one said this was gonna be a walk in the park, L,” Tony said, sensing his trepidation, “but it’s not going to be a fight club either. You’ll be on the same side next time you meet.” 

“I fear he will not see it that way.” 

“No, he probably won’t, that’s what the FBI agents with guns will be for,” Tony smiled softly, “But that’s a tomorrow problem. Good first day on the job, very productive.” 

Loki smirked. He could see that this employee employer relationship was going to be going quickly to Tony’s head, if it hadn’t already. 

“You though, Thor, you’ve spent too much time dithering around. I’m pretty sure you’ve got reports to submit to me by the close of play today. As in, a couple of hours from now.” 

Thor heaved himself up out of the armchair with an overdramatic sigh, “Of course, Tony, I will get right on that,” he said, though the grin on his face said very much the opposite, “I suppose it need not be a long goodbye anymore, given I am only a short elevator ride away,” the grin softened as he met Loki’s gaze. 

“I suppose not,” Loki replied, the realization of Thor’s new, almost immediate proximity bringing unbidden memories of their time at Asgard and a new, unfamiliar, anticipation of seeing the man again soon to begin to make up those years lost to Thanos, “I’ll see you around, brother.” 

Thor’s smile held strong as he nodded his head to the two of them and left the office.  

“Well, I don’t know about you, but I really, really need a drink and about two days sleep,” Tony said once they were alone. He rose his eyebrows at Loki briefly, then began to walk towards the door, “ice still got that spiked bottle, might actually kill two birds with one stone,” he called over his shoulder.  

Loki chuckled warmly to himself as he watched Tony head for the door. This man who was his salvation. Who’s capacity for love was so unending that he would make light of something that had so broken them both only a couple of weeks before, because he knew that it was what Loki needed to hear. This man who was likely the only one who could truly understood Loki’s need for redemption and seen something in him that had been enough to put everything on the line to bring it about. This man who had shattered six years of apathy to become Loki's entire world, and taken on that responsibility with a delicacy that Loki could never have expected.  

He still wasn’t sure what he had done to deserve this, but he was willing to spend these next years trying to find out.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This seemed like a natural ending to this fic given I'm pretty terrible at endings anyway. Thank you all so much for the kudos and the comments. I'm so glad you've enjoyed it! I really like this AU and so I may revisit it with one-shots/drabbles set after this if anyone would be interested? In meantime, once again thank you for sticking with the fic, and the very unreliable upload schedule. You guys are the best! <3


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